When I woke up some time later, it was pitch black.
I knew I was outside because I could smell leaves and hear the soft chatter of the wildlife.
I slowly sat up clutching my throbbing head.
I squinted trying to adjust my eyes to the low lighting, scanning my surroundings till my eyes fell on a body outline by the light from the moon.
"Why'd you have to knock me out?" I asked Ezekiel irritated.
"You were in emotional distress." I heard him reply.
"You killed my boyfriend." I retorted.
Then as the realization dawned on me, yet again, I lashed out. I could barely see him but I felt my nails dig into skin as I fought him. We rolled around the forest floor.
"Get. Off." He hissed.
"You. First." I retorted giving him a good kick to the chin.
He hissed and threw me off of him. I immediately retaliated and threw him down to the ground.
I straddled him and pinned his arms down.
"Where are-"
I was cut off by a knife at my throat. I knew it was a knife because of the cold metal.
"Stand up very slowly." The voice whispered threateningly.
I almost cried as I immediately recognized it.
"Blu." I breathed.
"That's my name." She turned me to face her. She was smirking. "Don't wear it out." She looked over my shoulder at Ezekiel.
The ground was now lit by lamps.
I could see a small tent and random tools spread out on the ground.
"I'm leaving." She informed him still holding the knife at my throat. She spoke to Ezekiel as if I wasn't even there.
"Leaving?" he repeated. "Where?"
She smiled in triumph. "I just got a job offer. I'm going to California!"
He gave her an incredulous look.
"No way. What about us?"
She shrugged. "I'm going to Hollywood. I'm sure I'll forget all about us. As for you..." she cocked her head to the side. "Well, it was nice knowing you."
She pushed me towards him. He caught me and held my hands tightly behind my back.
He was still gaping at her.
"I can't believe you Blu." I finally said.
She scoffed. "You can't believe me?!"
She stepped towards me.
"You've been royalty this whole time and didn't even tell me! I saw you in that stupid magazine. Ezekiel was there that day. He'd been visiting all the museums that displayed Solveige, he got lucky because I told him I knew you. I didn't know what he wanted with you and he was really cute, so naturally I did what he wanted." She said shrugging.
"I'd call it perfect timing, but that's rude...you know since their talking about killing you, but don't worry you're in good hands."
She stooped down and picked up her bag.
Blu frowned. "I am really sorry Aaliyah." She said Somewhat sincerely. She looked over my head. "Ezekiel." And with that she left.
I stared after her. She'd been the one on the inside who told about our impending departure. If she hadn't told we would have been gone.
Kenneth would have been alive.
"Give me your gun." I hissed.
"For what?" Ezekiel asked bewildered.
I elbowed his stomach and snatched the gun away running after her.
"Hey Blu!" I called ignoring Ezekiel who was running after me yelling my name.
She turned. I could only tell it was her because of her flashy shirt in the moonlight.
"Thanks for killing my boyfriend." I told her, hiding the gun.
She gaped at me in horror. "Kenneth's dead?" she breathed.
I glared at her. "It's your fault." I informed her. "It's all your fault!"
I raised the gun. Both Ezekiel and Blu were yelling at me but I ignored them.
I closed my eyes and pulled the trigger.
~
My whole body was numb. I had no idea how I had ended up here.
I was supposed to be finishing my senior year. With Alex and Kenneth.
I was going to dance school.
None of that was happening now.
Blu wasn't dead. That was good. But I was still shaken. I'd almost killed a person. An actual person. I was so glad I hadn't because then I would have been no better than Ezekiel, or his father.
I was sitting inside the tent staring at the woven fabric. It was woven so tightly you could barely see the lines, from far it appeared solid brown.
But if you leaned in closer you could see the individual strings criss crossing each other evenly.
I imagined the world to be like that. I pretended Solveige was there somewhere where my mother was.
It would have been perfect if the world wasn't chaotic and intricate.
We were too challenged for the straight, even lines of the fabric.
My world felt like it was fallen apart. As if somebody had pulled one thread, that would unravel the entire fabric.
"You're boring a hole into the tent." Ezekiel said crawling inside. It was really cramped but he made himself fit.
"This tent was built for one." I informed him.
I could feel his breath on the back of my neck.
He didn't answer so we sat in silence.
We sat for so long I began to wonder if he'd fallen asleep sitting upright.
But then he spoke.
"My father hates me." He whispered.
I didn't say anything, wondering if he would continue.
"He thinks I'm useless. I try over and over to prove myself to him but he's never satisfied..."
I wondered why he was talking to me. He was my kidnapper and I was his victim.
"I had an older brother. He seemed to do everything right. He was always...better, no matter what I did. One day...we...we were playing a game in one of my grandfathers courtyards. We weren't rich but he had a bit of land in Solveige and we stayed with him sometimes...my brother challenged me to a race. We would race to the cliff beyond the house."
Ezekiel took a deep breath and I could sense something bad coming.
"We always used to race there, it was dangerous, but that was the thrill of it. He beat me of course, this time was different though...I got angry..and I wasn't thinking. He kept smirking and taunting me." His voice was rising in anguish. "He was always taunting me...boasting about his superiority."
I turned to look at him. He was glaring at the side of the tent. Though I knew I shouldn't, I felt kind of sorry for him.
"What happened next?" I whispered afraid to speak loudly.
He didn't answer for a while.
Then I felt his breath by my ear.
"I pushed him over."
I gasped and turned fully to face him.
"Did he..."
Ezekiel's face contorted in anger. "Die?! Yes. He did. I killed my brother. My father never forgave me and he barely looks at me because I'm not him. I'm not Mattheu." He spat.
I looked away. I didn't want to feel sorry for him. I hated him.
"Why are you telling me this?" I asked bitterly.
"So you can understand...so you can understand why I did what I did. At the time I wanted I impress my father but..."
He took my hand and I snatched it away. "I'm really sorry Aaliyah."
I glared at him. "Don't apologize. You can't take it back. You can't bring him back. Just get out." I spat.
"I'm really sorry." Ezekiel kept saying. "I wish I could change what I did bu-"
"You can't! Okay?! So quit talking about it and apologizing as if you ran over my foot! You killed my boyfriend! There's no way you can take it back and an apology is not enough!" I yelled. It felt good to get it out.
And then I was crying.
Wrenching sobs racked my body. I felt like I wasn't even myself. I was holding my sides like I couldn't keep myself together.
Ezekiel was still in the tent.
"It gets better...when I lost my brother. I thought I would never recover. But I did." He tried to soothe me.
I scoffed at him. "You didn't recover." I told him. "You're crazy. Psychotic." I shook my head in disgust. "You're a monster!"
"Just leave me alone." I repeated.
Finally, he got the message and I felt his warmth leave as he exited the tent.
Once I was finally alone, I immediately regretted it. I needed company to distract me. And who was better company than my boyfriends killer?
I sighed and laid down on the blankets Ezekiel had laid out.
I didn't know how exhausted I was until my head hit the pillow. I was asleep in no time.