TW: Minor graphic fighting scenes ahead
"I have to go," I told Gandalf and Bilbo.
I turned to look at my brother whose prior look of sympathy was replaced with one of utter confusion.
"What do you mean?" He asked, looking between me and the Company who was now fighting alongside Dain, "You can't seriously be thinking of going right now."
"Of course I am Bilbo. It's obvious the sickness has worn off has it not, Gandalf?" I asked the wizard.
"It would appear y/n is correct. Thorin would never leave his hold if still impacted by dragon sickness. I would believe that this turn of events would mean we have regained our trusty dwarven king." Gandalf smiled, clearly as happy with Thorin's improvement as I was.
Bilbo remained silent.
"What's gotten into you? Two seconds ago you were consoling me and now you've changed your mind?" I asked, my tone dripping with annoyance.
"The last time he saw you, y/n, he hit you. He belittled the both of us, then slapped you across the face. How could you be so quick to forgive and forget?"
"Obviously I haven't forgotten but that wasn't him. Do you think the Thorin we knew in Beorn's cottage or in Thranduil's dungeon would have done that? It was the gold and it wasn't his conscious mind. I haven't forgiven him but I do love him and if there's a chance I can hear him out then I will."
Bilbo sighed but his expression changed, "You're right. I don't understand the same way but that doesn't mean my judgement of him is justified. I'll help you get to him in any way I can."
I smiled and placed my hand on his shoulder before looking at Gandalf.
"I appreciate that Bilbo, I do. But this is something I need to do alone. I can't be dragging you both away from the battle to help me reconnect with Thorin. I have my weapon and my ability to stay hidden from most if I chose to," I told them, earning a look of understanding from Gandalf.
"What? No. No, I'm not leaving you alone," Bilbo said, looking to Gandalf for support.
"Y/n is able to hold her own. This is something she needs to do and I think it's best we let her do it while helping out in the city while we can," He told my brother.
"If you die, I'll kill you," He whispered, pulling me in for a hug.
"I'll be back in time for tea," I whispered back, my eyes growing cloudy with tears.
I smiled at them both before turning away and heading back the way I had come. It would be easy to bring them both and it was probably stupid to go alone but I stood by what my gut told me. It wasn't fair to force Bilbo and Gandalf to follow me down a path that wasn't their own. Thorin was my cause; my reason; my purpose. I needed to do this alone.
The walk back on my own felt longer. The area we had come from seemed to have been cleared and signs of life came from Laketown men which gave me a reassuring feeling of safety. I held my sword in front of me, nonetheless. Attacks always seemed to arrive when one was least expecting it and I knew I couldn't let my guard down, even for a moment. I continued down the path, doing my best to follow the roads that felt familiar. Eventually, I would either hit the city's walls or a way out so it didn't matter too much which roads I took. I guttural sound just off to my left sent a chill down my spine and I turned my head quickly. A single orc emerged from behind a broken building and was feasting on what looked like a poor man's leg. I sprinted as fast as I could to the closest bit of shelter, a broken-off piece of building that must have been damaged during Smaug's first encounter with this area of Middle Earth.
I held my sword close to my chest and held my breath in order to rely on my ears to pick up the orc's location. A gust of wind blew from behind me and I thanked my lucky stars again that the orc would have a harder time picking up my scent. I took a deep breath and slowly peered up from behind the rubble. The orc seemed to have disappeared entirely which only raised my guard more. It must have seen me and was waiting to strike.
Almost as if answering my own internal question, the orc jumped out of the rubble to my right and let out a scream. I let out one of my own and fell backwards in fear. My sword had dropped from my hands and, without taking my eyes off the orc, I felt around on the ground for my weapon. I let my eyes wander down and my stomach dropped as I realized the orc was standing on my blade. It seemed to notice my disadvantage as well and gave a smirk. It understood the situation and the advantage it had over me. It kicked the sword away from me and I crawled backwards in fear, immediately regretting my decision to go alone. The orc crept closer to me and I let out another cry for help. My body went cold as the orc slowly raised its sword and my mind went to my brother, then Thorin, my mother and father, the company, Gandalf. Their faces flashed before my eyes and I found myself feeling comforted by the fact that I had been loved by all these people. My whole life, I had always been loved and in my last moments on Middle Earth, it was comforting to know I lived my life to the fullest extent I could. I let my eyes close, ready for the inevitable but right as the orc's sword should have pierced my chest, its breathing halted and a warm liquid splattered onto my face. I wiped it away from my eyes and looked up in confusion. The orc still stood in front of me but a blade was pierced through its throat and blood leaked from its mouth and stab wound. Someone had saved me.
I pushed myself backwards, ready to thank my saviour and was met with a pair of familiar blue eyes I couldn't have been happier to see.
"Amrâlimê," The voice cracked.
My cheeks flushed, "Thorin."
The dwarf pulled me off of the ground and into his arms, one going around my waist and one cradling my head. Both of my hands tangled in his hair, happy his head was without a silly crown. My eyes filled with tears and I let them fall, tightening my grip on him.
"I feared I would never see you again," He told me, not making any motion to let me go.
"And I you. After what had happened, I feared the worst might happen to you, that it was too late."
"I fought the demons in my head and I would do it again to hold you like I am right now."
I let out a small sob, baffled that this was the same dwarf from only a day prior. I loosened my grip and he did the same, allowing his face to come into view of my own. I placed a hand on his cheek and he chuckled.
"You've got a little something," He started, bunching up his sleeve to wipe away at the blood on my face.
"That was your doing," I teased.
"Hey!" He put his hands up in defeat, "I saved your life."
I rolled my eyes at him, placing my second hand on his cheek and pulling him towards me. To my surprise he hesitated, pulling back and turning my face to the side.
"I did that to you?" He whispered, brushing his thumb against the small bruise on my cheekbone from his slap at the gate.
I nodded softly, "But I know it wasn't really you."
"Y/n," He looked me dead in the eyes, "I cannot put into words the apology you deserve from me. I am so terribly sorry for the pain I caused you, not just at the gate but since the moment we arrived at the mountain."
He paused, tracing his thumb along my cheekbone, my jaw, my lips.
"Amlanthi sulla dê astâ," He whispered, "You mean everything to me. And I will prove my apology in my actions."
"I forgive you," I told him honestly, tears running down my cheeks.
I pulled him towards me again, this time with no hesitation on his end and our lips met. Fireworks exploded in my mind and it felt like I was kissing him for the first time. He pulled away, his cheeks flush, and pressed his forehead to mine.
"Marry me," He whispered.
I pulled away in shock, "What?"
"Marry me. Let me court you. Let me show the world my love for you. But most importantly, let me prove to you my love for you is grander than anything on this Earth. Marry me."
He held my hands in one of his and reached into a pocket of his pants, pulling out two small silver beads. I looked at him confused.
"In the dwarvish courting tradition, I would braid one of these into your hair and you would braid one into mine. Traditionally there is a bit more to it than that but seeing as our situation is less than ideal, if you agree, this would seal our love."
"Ok."
"Ok?" He smiled.
"Yes, yes! Yes, yes," I chanted, kissing him again.
"I love you Y/n Baggins."
"I love you Thorin Oakenshield."
He pulled me into a hug and I let myself forget about the battle around us. He pulled away slightly and placed one of the metal beads in my hand.
I looked up at him confused, "I thought you said we were supposed to braid these into our hair?"
"We are, I just don't want to do that here. For now, your word is enough for me."
"For now?"
"When this is all over, we'll have a real wedding. I'll braid your hair, and you mine; we'll invite the company, Bilbo, Gandalf too if he wants. Everyone can bare witness to our love but for now, keep this with you as a symbol. It's not official but at least you know my heart is yours."
"And mine is yours Thorin, until the end of time."
He pulled me to him again, kissing my lips with such intense passion.
"Will you come with me?" He asked softly, touching his forehead to mine.
"Where?"
"Up the mountain. I've asked Kili, Fili, and Dwalin to follow me. We're killing Azog."
I looked at him, surprised.
"It's time to put an end to this, once and for all," He said, his voice stoic.
"When do we leave?" I asked, looking away from him and up at the mountain.
"Now."
I nodded and he gripped my hand in his own, guiding me towards what I assumed would be an eventual exit. The battle had moved more towards the middle of the city which meant Thorin and I were protected for now. His hand held mine with such intense force as if he was scared to let me go; not that I was particularly interested in being apart from him either. Neither of us spoke as we walked; there was nothing else to be said. I knew he couldn't take back what happened in the mountain, and so did he. None of that mattered now.
I looked away from the road ahead and at his face. He looked stern, eyes ahead, ready for anything that would have dared cross our path.
"There," He said, nodding in front of him.
Turning my gaze back to the road I could see just up ahead where the three dwarves waited for us. I smiled and choked back a sob; while it had only been a mere few days since I had seen the company, I missed them like family. Kili's goofy smile shone the brightest and I knew he must have been over the moon to finally have his uncle back.
"Miss Baggins, I'm happy to see you're safe return to us," Balin said, grabbing my hands in his own.
"I'm happy to be back," I told them honestly, looking at each one.
"It wasn't the same without you and you're attitude that's for sure," Dwalin laughed, patting me on the shoulder.
I laughed along, treasuring this moment with the dwarves. I didn't know where the path ahead would lead me and I wanted, more than anything, to ensure I had fond memories to look back on when this was all over.
"Well, shall we get going?" FIli asked us, looking to his uncle for guidance.
Thorin looked at his eldest nephew then up ahead, "Lead on."
This was it, the final battle was about to begin.
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Translations and A/N
Amrâlimê: My Love
Amlanthi sulla dê astâ: You mean everything to me
A/N: Here it is! The long awaited update! Hopefully these are a bit more regular but no guarantees... nevertheless, the story continues!