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U L T R O N
6
"You can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you'll find you get what you need."
Missouri, America
August, 2015
WILLING PARTICIPANTS. THAT WAS all Lucy could think of as she shut the technical file of Wanda and Pietro Maximoff. Their history with HYDRA was extensive, starting all the way back to the age of ten. They were merely children when they'd joined HYDRA voluntarily; the same age they'd lost their parents. No wonder Verfall and Winter were never introduced to them—they were too young, too naive, and if they had seen what they were doing to the pair, then, well, they would've tried to run. Even now, they were only fifteen.
Fifteen.
But, that was besides the point.
Wanda and Pietro had been willing participants, according to the files, and Lucy felt bile climb her throat. To think a pair of children had entered HYDRA's arms, willingly, was the greatest gift they could've been offered. They must've groomed the pair into thinking the only truth to world peace was through HYDRA ideals.
She shuddered, because the worst part of it all, was the fact that they weren't willing participants.
No matter how many times the HYDRA agents wrote them down as willing participants, they most definitely weren't. They'd been manipulated as children to join a terrorist organization without truly knowing what they were capable of. Children could not consent to experiments, not that the agents cared much about whether or not one was willing to become a mindless weapon.
She sighed, turning the tablet off.
From what she could tell, the Maximoff twins had not been stripped of their autonomy or free will. They didn't need to have an extensive programming regime like she and James had experienced because HYDRA had them since they were young. They were still themselves, and hadn't been subjected to the final stage of conditioning—compliance training.
Which allowed them to choose whether or not they wanted to fight alongside Ultron, which also meant they'd been manipulated.
Again.
She wondered how long she'd aided HYDRA in using the pair of children—wondered how they recreated her abilities, enhancing Wanda far past what she was capable of.
There was another part of her that felt relieved.
Wanda understood what it meant to be dangerous in an otherworldly fashion; her abilities had been given by the scepter, Lucy's abilities had been given by the tesseract and the essence of Loki's sister.
Of magic and aliens.
She felt sympathy swell in her chest—the poor children hadn't even known what they'd been getting into—but she wasn't sure if James would be as understanding. It would be difficult for James to wrap his mind around the fact someone had volunteered, whether or not they were children. Unless—unless that was merely Winter's behavior and Lucy just forgot to differentiate him from James again.
She winced, a fresh wave of guilt riddling her shoulders.
It seemed she couldn't give up certain thoughts and habits. In that aspect, it was slightly easier for James, because his memories were not as sharp.
Lucy, on the other hand, remembered willingly allowing her to be subjected to Winter's violence because she deserved it and he needed to release all of his emotions before any of the agents noticed.
She stood from her seat at the kitchen table, walking towards the front door, where Steve, James and Tony were, cutting pieces of wood in the front yard.
She bit the inside of her lip, uncertain of how she should approach Steve.
Her eyes flicked to James as she shut the front door, shoving her hands in her pockets. He broke a piece of wood with a heavy axe, wiping sweat off his brow, metal hand glinting in the sun. He glanced at her and Lucy felt her cheeks heat up at the scene in front of her.
She padded forwards across the grass and James dropped the axe to the floor.
Tony and Steve glanced at her as she leaned forwards and nuzzled into the crook of his neck. James's arms moved to wrap around her easily, his gaze gentle.
"Hey." He said softly. "Didn't mean to walk out on you. The kids are playing with Apollo."
Lucy sighed against his neck, holding onto him for a little bit longer because they would be away from each other for so so long—
James nuzzled back into her.
She pulled back from him as Tony cleared his throat rather dramatically. She glanced at him for a second before letting her eyes flick to Steve. He was looking away from the pair, eyes squinted to combat the sun glaring at him.
"Steve." She called softly, taking a careful step forward. "I'm. . ."
"Sorry?" Steve finished, raising an eyebrow.
Lucy winced, nodding her head.
"We thought. . .because—well—there was no correlation we had with Clint—we didn't expect him to bring us here but—" she stammered, stumbling over words as she thought of what to say.
Steve's lips quirked upwards slightly, but he didn't look. . .well. He looked just as tired as everyone else did, and Lucy wondered what exactly Wanda had shown him.
"It's okay, Lucy." Steve said. "I'm not upset—well, I was. But, I get it. I read the files so I know—I know. And the whole thing with Pierce—I understand now. So. . .we're okay."
He gave her a meek smile.
Lucy never thought he'd see him become so weary.
"Oh." Lucy sounded dumbfounded. "I—thank you, Steve."
He nodded his head, before grabbing another log, preparing to split it. She glanced at Tony as he swung his axe with a huff, breaking the wood in half with slight difficulty. James and Steve had accumulated the most wood, and Lucy wondered if they were trying to make it a competition.
She cleared her throat, glancing across the field.
"Where did Thor go?" She asked, hoping he'd somehow managed to find Loki within the year.
Of course, she was concerned for Thor's well being, but Loki had seen the raw, vulnerable pieces of her. He'd decided against utilizing her for just the abilities she had, and that somehow made them closer.
Besides, he'd been there right after Pierce had conditioned the living hell out of her. And that was—and he'd been—
So nice.
"He left—something about the vision the Maximoff kid showed him." Steve said as he tossed a piece of wood into his pile.
Lucy blinked.
"Thor didn't say where he was going for answers?" Tony inquired.
Steve stepped forwards, grabbing another log.
"Sometimes my teammates don't tell me things." He said, and the remark pointed fingers at all three of them. "I was kinda hoping Thor would be the exception."
Lucy grimaced.
Steve was used to the Howling Commandos, who were a tight-knitted group that moved together like one collective organism. But the Avengers were far from such a team. They were each remarkably different, with traumatizing pasts and bucketloads of trauma—not that the Howling Commandos were perfect or anything.
But Lucy was ninety-nine percent sure that none of the Howling Commandos had been experimented on and turned into weapons like the Black Widow or locked in a cave by terrorists for months on end.
Was it probably a little unhealthy that Steve was comparing two and two in his head? Lucy wasn't sure, but she did know that Steve still had his head very much wrapped in the past.
He would have to learn to live without them.
"Yeah, give him time." Tony nodded before turning his head towards Lucy. "Hey, mind helping me out here?"
He waved a hand towards the pile of uncut logs.
Lucy rolled her eyes at him lightly, stepping forwards and grabbing one of the logs. She placed it on the trunk Tony was using, holding her hand out for the axe.
He raised an eyebrow.
"Uh—I meant, you know," he wiggled his fingers.
Lucy drew her hands back sharply, fidgeting with her fingers as she took a small step backwards.
"Stark, if she doesn't use her abilities on me when I'm in pain, she probably won't split pieces of wood for you." James said pointedly, eyebrow raised.
Tony raised an eyebrow at him as James swung his axe.
Lucy glanced at James, analyzing his expression—he seemed relaxed, not as tense as he used to be around Steve. Maybe their time away from everyone else had been beneficial; but benefits always came with something negative.
Always.
"Now I feel like smacking Reindeer Games." Tony frowned, leaning on the axe. "I mean, it's a bit self-conceited if he thinks he can just possess people's bodies. And that's a whole other level of weirdness."
Lucy pursed her lips.
"Not really. I mean, Agent Marks was implying something and I wouldn't have done anything about it if Loki hadn't stepped in." She crossed her arms over her chest. "He shouldn't have killed them with my hands, but he helped, and that matters just as much. Besides, Agent Marks deserved to die."
"I agree." James remarked as he raised a hand. "But he died too fast. Should've tied him up and beat the living shit out of him. At least Sasha got crushed by a building."
Lucy raised an eyebrow, turning to him.
"Actually, I'm pretty sure Pierce died from gunshot wounds. And it was to the heart too. He would've been dead in a minute." She replied.
James groaned.
"Oh, c'mon, that's so unfair. You're telling me the Commander suffered more than Sasha did?" He pouted.
Lucy's eyelid twitched.
"Last I checked, Pierce is dead and the Commander is still alive." She said pointedly.
James rolled his eyes childishly, but said nothing to retort to the comment.
She turned her gaze to Steve and Tony, who were looking between them weirdly. She raised an eyebrow as the pair both gave each other looks. Then they turned back to their pile of wood.
"So Wanda," Lucy started; the pair paused once again, "I'm fairly sure if we were to fight, I would lose. Since her abilities are based around the magic of the scepter, her capabilities of telekinesis, energy manipulation, and neuroelectric interfacing makes it extremely difficult for me to apprehend her."
Steve pursed his lips, brows furrowing with confusion.
"But, you can too, right? Uh—the telekinesis and energy manipulation, I mean." Steve said.
Lucy tilted her head.
"I can manipulate energy, yes, but I can't float things around like that, Steve. It may look like I am, but I'm not using my mind solely to lift something. I manipulate the molecules surrounding the object, making it lighter or heavier as I please." She explained. "That's what allows me to float objects. I do so at such a fast rate that any molecular division I create can't be seen with the naked eye."
She cleared her throat.
"Anyway, without an extra boost, I would probably lose to her. But only when it comes to our abilities. If I were to fight her hand to hand, I would win, undeniably." She added. "And by extra boost, I mean I have to use necro-energy; dark manipulation. The abilities Loki helped me use."
Tony opened his mouth, shut it, then opened it again.
No sound escaped his lips, and Lucy raised an amused eyebrow at him. He huffed as Steve stepped forwards, giving him a small look.
"So what you're saying is, you could apprehend her and her brother, possibly? With or without casualties?" He asked.
Lucy clasped her hands together.
"Without. But that does come with a risk. I've never used necro-energy to its full extent successfully without the help of Loki." She bit the inside of her lip. "The two other occasions I used those abilities, I didn't even do five percent of what Loki did."
Tony grimaced, remembering the dark spears that'd sprouted across the room like wild roses, thorns piercing into the walls, only to disappear as if they were never there in the first place.
Lucy could remember that just as vividly.
That's why she hadn't used her abilities in months, and had become rather rusty from disuse. But she could snap back into it instantly—that's what she had to do with HYDRA after all.
"If I try to use necro-energy to the extent that I'll need, well, it's possible I might release too much energy." She paused. "I won't be able to control it. At that point, Loki will have to do. . .something. I don't know. In fact, I don't know about any of this. It's very theoretical."
James frowned at her, and she shuffled on her feet.
She had been under the assumption that Tony had told James she'd be joining the Avengers for their next mission. Clearly though, Lucy hadn't exactly dwelled on that thought long enough.
She exhaled as James placed his hands on his waist.
"So you're going to the frontlines." He stated.
Lucy cocked her head to the side.
"Yeah. I can do what I want, right?" She remarked.
They stared at each other, and Steve looked between them with sudden unease. Lucy straightened, cracking her neck as she took a confident step forwards. James mirrored her movements, arms crossing over his chest.
She kept her gaze locked onto him, refusing to back down.
"So you wouldn't mind if I stayed with Brock for a while." His words sounded flat.
Lucy narrowed her eyes.
Going to the Commander for some reprieve was blatantly unfair. They both were struggling to remain human, and it was so ridiculous if James got to live with Brock and Jack for some time. Because Brock wasn't afraid to tell them what to do—he didn't treat them like fragile people. He treated them like soldiers; like equals.
He, quite frankly, didn't give a fuck about their trauma.
And that was refreshing in it's own way.
So yes, that was unfair, especially when the Asset had always had the Commander's attention.
"No." She snorted, jutting her chin to the side. "I wouldn't mind. 'Cause it's somethin' you want to do. I ain't gonna stop you from doing somethin."
James scoffed, uncrossing his arms and throwing them in the air instead.
"Seriously? Just because I want to do something doesn't mean you should support it. Lucy, you haven't used your abilities in months. Going to fight is like suicide!" He raised his voice.
Why did he always get to raise his voice first?
"Yeah? Is it? Well guess what James, I'm not as weak as you think—I can handle myself!" She snapped, stomping forwards.
Tony glanced at Steve, completely at a loss. Steve sent him a similar expression.
"Oh, really. You really think so. We were a tag team for a fuckin' reason, Lucy." He sneered.
Lucy's eyes widened with disbelief.
"James, you and I agreed to separate—" she pointed at him.
"Wait? What—" Steve's voice was muted.
"Yes! Not for you to run into the fucking fight again!" James threw his hands in the air again.
Lucy put a hand on her hip, rubbing her temples with the other.
"What the fuck do you want me to do, James? Clearly, they need our help but we can't be together so I'm volunteering because I should. Because I can and I fucking want to. You can't take those rights away, James." She snarled.
James clenched his hand into a fist and Lucy couldn't help the small flinch that traveled through her body. He clenched his jaw, before taking a controlled step backwards.
Lucy bit the inside of her cheek hard.
A tense moment of silence passed.
James released a long sigh, his shoulders loosening. A few strands of hair fell in his face as he looked away guiltily.
"Sorry." He mumbled.
Lucy blinked profusely, before letting her shoulders drop as well.
"I—yeah." She inhaled softly. "Sorry. I'm sorry. Too. I don't know why I—"
She stopped abruptly, remembering Steve and Tony were still standing right beside them. She took a halting step backwards, her face turning pale as she glanced at them. She didn't mean to argue with James like that.
It was–it was compulsive, uncontrollable; emotional.
"Sorry, Steve, we've just been. . ." James exhaled. ". . .not really fitting together like we used to."
Lucy pressed her lips into a thin line.
"HYDRA took everything, I guess. Took our freedom, our relationship." She exhaled. "They took everything. And we're supposed to build it all back up,"
She lowered herself to the ground, sitting in the grass. She plucked at the pieces, tugging at the greenery with agitation.
James watched her for a long moment, before moving to her side. He sat down besides her, letting a hand press against hers. She leaned her head onto his shoulder, eyes squeezing shut.
She didn't want to leave James, yet at the same time, she knew it would benefit her–it would benefit him too.
"'Earth's mightiest heroes.'" Steve started quietly. "Pulled apart like cotton candy."
Lucy couldn't tell if he was talking about the Avengers or the pair, or both.
"Seems like you walked away alright." Tony remarked as he picked up his ax.
Steve did the same, eyes narrowing at him for a split second as he settled a log on top of the broad trunk beneath. Steve leaned back, staring at Tony.
"Is that a problem?" He asked.
Tony paused as he held his ax.
"I don't trust a guy without a dark side." His ax fell onto a log, splitting it cleanly in two. "Call me old-fashioned."
"Fuddy duddy." James added with a nod of agreement.
Tony rolled his eyes at him, before looking back at Steve.
"Well, let's just say you haven't seen it yet." Steve said firmly.
Lucy wondered if Tony never fought side by side with Steve. If he did, then he would see the terrifying rage he possessed towards HYDRA. He would see how bloodily he fought, how many neck he broke because he wanted HYDRA to feel at least a pinch of what James and Lucy had both experienced.
Steve was horrifying when he wanted to be, for somewhat justifiable reasons. He was more of a vigilante than a hero when he fought HYDRA. His hatred towards them was incomparable to most, after all, good becomes better, bad becomes worse.
"You know Ultron is trying to tear us apart, right?" Tony remarked.
"Well, I guess you'd know." Steve lifted his ax and dropped it on the log. "Whether you'd tell us is a bit of a question."
Lucy winced at the distrust Steve held towards him.
"Banner and I were doing research." Tony snapped.
"That would affect the team." Steve replied pointedly.
"That would end the team!" Tony cut in. "Isn't that the mission? Isn't that the 'why' we fight?"
Lucy watched Steve analytically as he picked up a log with both of his hands.
"So we can end the fight. So we get to go home?!"
He ripped the log in half, and James stiffened at the strength Steve displayed. Lucy rubbed the back of his hand comfortingly, and he relaxed at the feeling immediately.
"Every time someone tries to win a war before it starts, innocent people die." Steve's voice was grave. "Every time."
Laura approached the four of them and Lucy glanced up at her as Tony's eyes flicked to the side.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Stark." Laura said as she looked between them. "Clint said you wouldn't mind, but our tractor doesn't seem to want to start at all. I thought maybe you might. . ."
Lucy's eyes flicked to Clint, who was holding Lila to his chest. He looked back at her with a knowing gaze.
"Yeah, I'll give her a kick." Tony nodded firmly, forcing a tiny smile. "Don't take from my pile."
He pointed to the meager pile of wood he'd accumulated.
Lucy watched him leave, padding through the grass softly. She nodded her head at Laura, who smiled and turned back around, entering the cottage again.
Lucy tilted her head back as Steve dropped to sit on one of the larger trunks, releasing the longest breath she'd ever heard. He leaned his arms against his knees as he put his head in his hands. She gazed at him softly.
"Steve." She said gently. "Something's bothering you."
Steve looked up, a small tired smile forming on his lips.
"Yeah, well, I think she messed up something in all of us." Steve admitted.
It took Lucy a moment to realize who he was referring to.
Wanda Maximoff.
She wondered if Steve would desire revenge–if Bruce would. But she was a teenager, wasn't she? One who'd been manipulated and taken advantage of, turning into a weapon without realizing it?
"What did Wanda show you, Steve?" She asked.
Steve's eyes flicked to James, then shifted back to her.
"Everything I can't have." He said bitterly.
Everything I can't have.
Lucy knew what that felt like.
And it was her own personal hell.
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