Sunday
I hear my name being called, the voice sounding familiar. What's this strange wet feeling of grass underneath me? It's gross and sticky and my head is clouded.
"Jia, Hey. Wake up."
I struggle to open my eyes. The early morning sun cracking over the grass and trees of the park comes into vision.
"Jungkook? Huh? What are we doing here?" I watched apprehensively as he knelt down beside me, a sigh escaping him.
"You decided here was a good place to pass out, apparently," Jungkook reached out and gently wrapped his arms around me to pick me up.
"Oh..." A cascade of memories fell back into my mind, causing a guilty lump to form in my throat. I tried to swallow it down, reaching to hold around Jungkook's neck. He held me in his arms as he walked across the grass field and out of the park.
"Are you hurt?" He peered at me as he asked. I shook my head.
"I don't think so... Just feel really gross and sticky." I had a feeling that right about now he'd usually say something sarcastic or get annoyed at me for being reckless, but... It never came. Instead, he looked solemn as he spoke.
"Jia, I'm sorry."
"What? I'm so confused. What are you sorry for?" I mumbled, still clinging to his shoulders. His powerful arms that held me, the gently swaying as he walked, the nearness of him. These senses hit me.
"I'm sorry for leaving you last night... I'm sorry for not coming to get you sooner," Jungkook broke his gaze from me and looked straight ahead. We'd reached the road and were about to cross the street.
"That's my fault. Not yours... My stupidity..." I caught myself and stopped. Now wasn't the time to get into this.
"It's okay, let's just go home.." I mumbled, burying my face into his chest, not wanting to talk about it anymore. I felt him nuzzle his cheek against the top of my head. It was a warmth I hadn't felt from him in so long. It felt like home. A comfortable silence fell between us until we got back to the club and up to my lounge room.
"You should take a shower," Jungkook said as he carefully slipped off my heels, threw them to the side and put me down on my own two feet.
"Bet I look like hell. I feel it, that's for sure." I gave a short laugh, earning a crack of a smile from him.
A sudden dizzy spell hit me as he let go of me. I stumbled into him slightly. "You alright?" He was quick to grab ahold of my shoulders, but I brushed him off.
"Yeah, I'm okay. I um.. I'll go take a shower and then I'll lie down after that. It should be fine," I reassured him.
"Alright, I'll wait here. If you need anything, just call me." Jungkook bit at his lip before flicking his fringe to the side. He seemed doubtful but said nothing else.
I carefully made my way over to my room, grabbed a towel, and then went into the bathroom. Once the water was running warm, I stepped in, as the soothing feeling cascaded over my hair and body, I feel at ease. I'd managed to wash my hair and most of my body despite still feeling faint but, as I bent down to wash my legs I became light-headed. Vision blurred, and everything went blank. Fuck.
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When I came back to I was lying on the tile floor of the shower, wet, but the water wasn't running. Jungkook called my name, shaking me lightly.
"Jia. Hey, Jia," his brows furrowed in worry, I squeezed my eyes trying to get a grip of myself.
What the fuck. Why did I do this to myself?
In this moment, just how low had I sunk...
"Kook, fuck, what's happening..." I wanted to get up. I didn't want to be this messy pile on the fucking floor. Jungkook knelt down, wrapped his arms around me. Yet again, I felt myself being hoisted up. Ragged breaths, my insides tighten at the thought of how fucking hopeless and pitiful I must look right now.
"It's alright, you're going to be okay. Just try to relax. I got you." Jungkook carried me back into my room and set me down on my bed before rushing to grab a towel. I lay there for a moment, wet and naked, on my bed, trying not to let that knot inside my chest come undone and burst into tears like a fucking baby.
"Come here," Kook coaxed, rushing back in and sitting at the edge of my bed. He reaches out and pulls me over to dry my hair, which was soaked to where it was drenching my sheets.
I felt the light tugging at my head as I let him dry me. Then he moved lower and wrapped the towel around my chest.
"Argh," he exhales loudly, shaking his head as though trying to snap out of his own worry and lift the mood.
"Seriously, why do we always end up in situations where we're wet, naked and having some type of life crisis?" He huffs, picking up the pace as he rubs me down with the towel.
Part of me wanted to laugh. Laugh at the irony of it all, but I burst into tears instead. Flinging my arms around his shoulders, and bury my face away from the world.
"I don't know, but-" I sniffled.
"Gukkie," I sobbed, I just wanted to hold on to him so tight.
"It's okay, just cry. I already know how much of a crybaby you are, so just let it out." Even though it sounded mean, it wasn't. I focused on trying to take deep breaths. My face was damp from tears and I'd rubbed it messily all over his neck. I cried like the hopeless mess I was. Jungkook is careful as he finishes drying my lower half, even making sure to dry my butt properly. I was too distraught to care. He was gently just like every other time he's handled me. And it was soothing beyond belief.
He threw the towel aside and slides his hands into my damp hair, tugging me back so he could peer into my face. I'd calmed down but still felt weak. He gently places kisses on my cheeks, the last one being on my lips. I gulp thickly.
"Can you please stay with me? I don't want you to go again." I rubbed my eyes with the back of my hand.
"Yeah. I was already going to stay," He gave a small tsk before continuing, as though remembering something, "Tae is on the way, too. When I told everyone I found you and that you were alright, he said he'd be over asap."
"Oh... Okay," I nod. What a turn of events. I feel so out of sorts, wanting nothing more than to just relax and get my strength back. I free-fall back into my sheets and look up at my ceiling. A moment's silence passes.
"Um. Jia, could you maybe put some clothes on?" Kook cleared his throat. I lifted my head and peered over at him. He bit at his lip, his eyes wandered over me. Trailing my body.
"Oh right, sorry." I squeezed my legs together and sat up quickly. Trying to cover as much of myself as I could.
"Yeah. It's just hard seeing you like that." Jungkook averted his gaze whilst running a hand through his hair. It hadn't even crossed my mind, but he was right. He could literally see all of me right now. I grabbed a silk nightgown from the end of my bed and slipped it on.
Suddenly the sound of heavy footsteps echoed, they got louder until my door burst open and Tae came in, a plastic bag in hand.
"Tae, hey~" I gave a weak wave. The confused expression he wore melted slightly.
"Hey. You... You're okay?" He questioned, still lingering in the doorway.
"Yep. Nothing to worry about. Sorry to make you rush all the way over.." I felt bad. Tae visibly relaxed, took off his shoes, put the bag he carried down on the side table before crawling over and laying on my bed beside me.
"What's that?" Kook asked as he pointed at the bag.
"I was about to have lunch before you texted. We can eat together." Tae pulled me into a one-armed hug and gave me a small squeeze before letting go.
"Sounds good. My laptop is there if you wanted to watch a movie." I pointed at my vanity table. Jungkook stood up and stretched before grabbing it, kicking his own shoes off and crawling into the space on my other side.
We all got comfortable and sat up. Tae unpacked the food and placed it out in front of us while Kook started searching for a movie.
We decided on watching something light so we could still talk between us without missing too much of the movie. The atmosphere had settled comfortably as we ate the dumplings Tae had brought along with him. I couldn't help but to smile as he prodded me to open my mouth so he could feed one to me. Jungkook looked much more at ease too, laughing at our antics.
After we finished eating, we cleared the space and relaxed more. Laying back on the pillows, Kookie put the laptop on my lap so we could all see better. Tae slipped his arm under my head and Jungkook rolled on his side and rested his head on my shoulder. I let myself fall into the warmth they wrapped me in, pain melting away and being replaced with the most nostalgic feeling.
Time seemed to move in slow motion and as the day passed, the light from outside had faded, leaving us in the dark. Tae turned on my side table light, which gave my room a soft ambience. Light snoring was coming from my right. Jungkook's thick, dark brown hair framed his sleeping face. The weight of his head was heavy on my shoulder, so I tried to move, but I accidentally woke him up.
"How's your nap?" Tae asked, peering over at Kook. He yawned while nodding his head before readjusting and sitting up. "Yeah, pretty good".
"Was it? Did you, um... Have any dreams, by any chance?" I asked, glancing cheekily at him, but he just looked confused.
"Don't think so. Why?" His lips forming a little oh shape, I knew that expression well. It was the face he pulls mostly when he's curious, confused, or just totally distracted by his thoughts.
"Oh no reason, just wondering who you were calling baby in your sleep," I giggled. Tae broke into a cheeky smirk. We both knew I was messing with him, but Tae's always the type to go along with my mischief.
"Huh?! Baby?" Jungkook went wide-eyed before crinkling his face as though seriously trying to remember if he had a dream.
"Well, there's only one girl that I'd call baby. But, I really don't remember dreaming about her." Kook concluded, sucking in a sharp breath of air before turning to look between Tae and I. Tae just laughed.
"Ahh. So roundabout. Say it plainly for her." Tae shifted onto his side, head propped up on his elbow as he nudged Jungkook on with his suggestion. I reached up to Jungkook's jumper sleeve and fiddled with the soft fabric, which caused him to look down at me.
"Say what plainly? I do not know what you're talking about." He broke into a cheeky smile before sighing, slipping his arm under my head and pulling my face into his chest.
"And you, stop playing with my jumper. It tickles." He playfully smothered my face.
"Hey wait-" I giggle, but give up quickly at the sound of him and Tae laughing. I felt a kiss on top of my head, and then I felt Tae close in from behind me and wrap an arm around me.
A small comforting silence fell as we relaxed, all cuddled up together. Soon enough, I felt myself falling into sleep.
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I could hear voices speaking softly. They sounded so close, as though right next to me. I felt like I was dreaming, but I could still catch parts of the words being spoken.
"They still have her"...
"Can't keep her down there forever"....
It was muffled, bits and pieces...
"Need to decide"....
"She's seen too much"...
"No choice but to make her disappear for good"....