Thursday
The tune of a ring tone, which was followed by a husky groan and the rustling of sheets woke me.
"Hello? Joon?" The sleepy rasp in Hoseok's freshly woken voice causes me to crack my eyes open. I can barely focus as I watch a blurry vision of Hobi beside me, laying on his back, bare chest visible, phone to his ear.
"Oh really? Shit. Okay. I'm just with Jia. I'll get up right now." As hobi spoke he threw the sheets back and scrambled to find his clothes and put them on. I couldn't make out what was being said, even though I could faintly hear the voice of Joon at the other end of the call.
"Yeah, that's alright. We can just close for tonight. It might be easier this way anyway," he replied. I slowly stretched out, which caught Hobi's attention, as he glanced in my direction for a moment. I sat up as he said the last few words before hanging up.
"What was that about?" I questioned, clutching the blanket close to my chest to cover my body. Hoseok had gotten dressed completely and now stood in the centre of my room.
"That was Joon. Apparently, the shipment we've been expecting is arriving early." He let out a yawn and stretched before going over to the mirror to fix himself up.
"Oh, okay" I reached for my phone to check the time to see it was about 8 am. Hobi gave me a quick kiss before heading off, so I got up and ready for class.
I grabbed my bag and a canned coffee out of the fridge before setting off down the stairs. As I walked out into the bright sunny day, I noticed that there was a delivery truck parked down the alleyway where the back door of the club was situated. With what Hoseok had said this morning, I gathered that it might have something to do with that. I didn't give it much more thought than that. None of the boys had spoken to me about their dealings in that regard, so it'd be better for me to mind my business and leave it to them.
My first class of the day passed quickly. Afterwards, I grabbed a toasted sandwich and headed outside and found a nice, quiet picnic bench on campus to relax at. It was a beautiful day. The sound of birds chirping lightly and the soft breeze that blew past was refreshing.
Now might be a good time to listen to the boy's album and take notes. After everything that had transpired between P.D-Nim and me, that the boy's music was now my actual job meant I needed to know as much as I could. It had been 24 hours since the Album had dropped, so now was also the perfect time to read the listeners' opinions and criticism too. It was time to get to work.
I ate slowly as I listened with my earphones into the album. All while taking notes on my initial thoughts. I loved all the songs, and that they even had a little skit was creative. I'd did not know until now that Tae used to play the Saxophone...
I looked through the folder Joon had given me too; it contained many notes and useful information that gave me a better idea of things too. As I went through it, I couldn't help but feel... Passionate... The overall sound was gritty and had a very old school vibe but, it pulled from somewhere deep within me... It was hard to put into words perhaps but, it also made me feel like there was someone out there that gave a shit about the troubles adolescence faced. And also curious, seeing as there were tracks that alluded to topics I'd never asked the boys about.
As I listen to the song I'd help to contribute to, it hit me hard how relevant it is with the album... It left me feeling stunned and perhaps on the verge of a revelation.
Although the track had started out as a rough idea when I'd put it together, the result had taken those basic ideas of asking about dreams and had been turned into something complete. It was the boys doing along with their team, but what remained was, we held the same sentiments. This was clear and true at this moment. It warmed my heart.
As I sat there listening to the interlude, I couldn't help but be pulled into memories of earlier times with the boys.
I remembered sitting in the park with Joon as we spoke of our dreams. He'd asked me back then what mine was... I'd been a little vague at the time and said perhaps I didn't have a grander dream. I remember him saying not to hold myself back and at the time I was confused but, now looking back maybe he'd insinuated that if there was something I was passionate about to not be scared and go for it wholeheartedly.
We hadn't known each other long at the time, but, even then, had he been able to see through me? To sense that fear had played a part in me not chasing my dreams with more confidence and conviction? Maybe...
In all honesty, when I drafted the idea of the song, the inspiration had come from watching each of the boys in our earlier days... they had always blown me away by how they pushed forward and chased their dreams of making it so persistently. It was ironic, sentimentally.
I let my thoughts drift for a moment before I looked at the feedback from the album. This part scared me a little... When you put yourself out there like this, it leaves you feeling vulnerable...
I scrolled through some comments, noting that there were quite a lot of really nice ones. But some others weren't so nice either...
As I read through them, I felt a sting in my heart.. Some weren't even about the music.. They were personally directed at the boys and how they looked or... Some even mentioned the fact that the rappers, in particular, were previously underground and now that they'd debut as an Idol group...
I stopped and put my phone away. I just couldn't fathom some things that were being said. But, now that I had a general idea of how the album had been perceived, it would make it easier going forward.
Suddenly I saw a message notif flash, it was from Jungkook. I clicked it and opened it up to read it.
JK: Hey, we'll start doing that thing we talked about tonight. I'll come to pick you up from yours at 6 so be ready.
I quickly sent back an 'Okay, sure' and closed my phone. The way he said 'that thing' kinda had me stifling a laugh. Someone who didn't know the context of the conversation might've thought he was insinuating something kinky.
That was unexpected but, seeing as the club won't open tonight, it was good timing. My lunch break had gone by quickly, so I went off to my last class for the day. It was nearly 3 pm by the time I got home.
As I got closer to the front door, I noticed that Grey, the security guard, was standing by the entrance. He gave me a small smile and asked how my day was.
"It's been good! How about yours?" I replied, standing beside him. It wasn't often we had little chats like this, despite always seeing each other around.
"Yeah, not bad. The weather is nice today," he replied thoughtfully. It always threw me slightly at how nice he was when we talked. In contrast to his bad-ass and intimidating look, it was unexpected.
"Mm, right? It surprised me you're in today. I thought we were closing for tonight" I mentioned, I didn't know exactly how much he knew about certain things but, if he was here at a time like this, then...
"Yeah. Joon-Nim called me in. Better I'm around while they sort out stuff today." He gave a small smile. I knew what he was referring to.
"Glad you're here. Makes me feel much safer" I gave a small bow and returned his smile before saying goodbye and going inside. He gave a short, humble wave as I did.
As I entered, I could hear distant voices and talk coming from down in the basement, so I went over to the stairs and peered over the railing. Joon, Hobi and Koh sat at one table and Jin, Yu and Yoongi sat at another.
The tables had a cloth draped over them and they had a bunch of random equipment on them. I could see scales, bags, small pocket knives and something else that looked like white bricks...
I was so mesmerised by what I was seeing; it was like a scene out of a drug lord mafia cartel movie... I noticed Jin had seen me and was now making his way up the stairs towards me.
"Jia, how was school?" He asked as he approached. What a casual question to ask, considering he was weighing up what seemed to be cocaine only moments ago.
"It went well, pretty average day. Uh, I guess until I got home" I smiled sheepishly as I glanced over the railing towards the little ensemble downstairs.
Jin just laughed airily. "Yeah, can't argue there. Sorry to have to do this here, but there isn't anywhere else we can do it. It might still be a while until we're finished..." Jin put his arm around my shoulder and started to slowly ease me away from the scene below and over towards the stairs that lead up to my room.
"Sorry, little one, but I think you should stay upstairs for now. Is that alright?" Jin pulled away before scratching at the back of his head awkwardly.
"Yeah, that's okay. I get it... Anyway, GoodLuck with it. I'll be up in my room if you need me," I gave a small smile, hitching my bag further up my shoulder before turning to leave.
Jin seemed relieved that I had taken no offence in basically being told to buzz off and let the grown-ups do their thing. But he was right. It's not like I had an interest in what was happening, anyway. Sure, it was crazy but, by now with all the things I've seen it just didn't seem as bad...
I used my free time to catch up on some school work before Jungkook was supposed to come to get me. Time flew by, with about 30 minutes to spare. I went and got changed into something a little more appropriate for what we would be doing.
As I heard the creak of the staircase, I went back out into the main room to see Jungkook reach the top of the stairs.
"Hey, I'm ready," I called out to him, causing him to turn and catch sight of me.
"Okay good, let's get going" he waited a moment for me before we both took off together.
"Um, try to look as inconspicuous as you can. Ok?" Kook glance over at me for a moment as we wandered down the stairs together. Everything was still fairly quiet except for the boys who were downstairs. I could hear them and it gave me the impression they were still doing what they were before, but we got outside without being seen by them. Kook let out a relieved sigh as we stepped outside into the night air.
"So, um, do you always sneak around like that? Where are we even going?" I fired off questions as I strolled beside him. Kook flashed he a coy smirk.
"We're going to the park. It's quiet there at this time of night. There won't be anyone around,". Talk about selective hearing.
"Ohhh. Guess that makes sense," I nodded along. We kept going in a direction I knew. Jang-Jae. As we crossed over disappearing into the darkness of the park, I felt a strange nostalgia wash over me.
It was weird seeing as we'd never come here together in the middle of the night but, as I peered over at Jungkook's solid outline as he walked just ahead of me I felt safe.
We reached a silent grassy area that was dimly lit by an overhead lamp. "Okay, here looks like a decent spot" Jungkook stopped and glanced around before settling down on the grass.
"This is kinda weird Kookie... I mean.. Aren't you worried about perverts hiding in bushes or something?" I questioned as I copied what he was doing and sat down. I felt the grass rustle lightly as I did.
Kook just broke into a short laugh. "Why would I be scared of perverts in bushes?" His brow crinkled in bemusement as he looked at me.
"Huh? Haven't your heard? This is prime pervert territory! That's how they work... they wait in the bushes for unsuspecting people and then, when the time's right, they pounce?!" I explained. Did this guy know nothing?
"Omg Jia, what-?" Kook broke into laughter again before waving his hand in the air. "I've never heard of that before. Are you sure that's how it works?" He questioned. I noticed he'd began to stretch, so I did the same.
"Don't laugh. I was being serious..." I mumbled. Feeling a little hurt that he didn't believe me. I know it sounded kinda silly, but still.
"Okay, okay" he regained his composure. "Don't worry. If any creeps jump out of any bushes, I'll be here to protect you so" Kook gave a reassuring grin as he held out his hands to me. I gave a tiny nod and held them. I felt the light burn of my leg muscles stretching as we pulled each other gently forward.
After we were both warmed up, Kookie helped me to my feet. He explained and show me how to stand in a ready stance. Saying it was the absolute basics in self-defence, so even though I felt shy, I followed along and tried to copy him.
By the little bemused looks he gave me as I did, I couldn't tell if he was judging me and thinking how bad I was or if he just thought it was funny. Either way it only made me feel even shyer. It had already been a little awkward seeing as we weren't exactly on the best of terms right now either, so, try as I might, I couldn't help but let it get to me.
"Jia, half of the point of this is to give off a strong body-language barrier..." Kook gave a tiny sigh. "Try this" he came over and fastened himself around me from behind. I shuddered at the unexpectedness of it. He was so close...
"Sorry, I'm trying, I swear," I mumbled, feeling my legs turning to jelly. "Here, try to bend your knees a bit more" his breath beside my ear tickled, as he gripped my hips to guide my posture downward. I struggled to maintain my composure.
"Okay, like this?" I asked, peering behind me towards Kookie. I felt him distance himself from me and step around in front of me to get a better view.
"Ah, yea that's decent. You'll need to practice it more but let's leave it at that for now and move on," he stretched out his arms over his head before giving a loud clap.
"Alright! Next, I'm gonna show you how to palm somebody in the face," he declared. I stood naturally again. Wait, what did he just say?
"What? Really?" My brows crease for a second, he is a bit too enthusiastic about this and it kinda worried me.
"Yep. Okay so firstly- " he explained when to use it and then how to do it. I felt my insides swirl lightly. This side of him was so different to the innocent Jungkook I mostly knew...
"So, once you're in your ready stance, you rotate your left hip and shoulder and then BAM." I watched as he illustrated and hit thin air enthusiastically.
"Got it?" He raised a brow, waiting for my answer. "Uh, okay so- " I said, but Kook stopped me. "Don't worry, just try it on me first and we'll work on it from there" He took a subtle step forward and waved his hand, beckoning for me to attack him.
"Huh? Seriously? I'm just supposed to hit you?'" I felt a little nervous. "Yep. C'mon" he was unfazed.
"Alright, if you're sure" I took a deep breath and then jumped forward at him, but, in all my built-up awkwardness, I stumbled and fell right in to his chest, both of us to fall backwards.
I felt a rush of panic as we both toppled over. A glint of surprise crossed his features. I shut my eyes, landing right on him.
Still in shock, I took a few shallow breaths before peeking up simply to see him inches from me. His wide doe-eyes connect with mine. I could suddenly feel that in the fall he'd protectively wrapped his arms around me and was hugging me tightly.
The air between us was so fragile, I felt my heart racing; he glanced down at my lips... I felt panic wash over me suddenly and a sting in my chest.
"I'm so sorry, omg" in my shock I didn't know what to do, so I rushed awkwardly to stand up. Upon snapping out of whatever trance Kook was in, he eased his grip on me. "Uh, it's okay. I knew you were clumsy, but this is a record even for you" Kook hastily stood up and pat himself off. I don't know if my eyes were playing tricks on me, but he may have even been blushing.
After that, we called it a night and went back home. We stopped at a Convini on the way and grabbed some ramen for dinner, it was already late so we decided to eat together.
The mood eased back to normal as we chat and ate together at the table. I asked how his classes were going and he told me about them. Then he asked me how I was. It was a small comfort, being able to sit together like this and just talk without either of us holding some weird animosity to each other... it's almost as though we'd both forgotten about the recent events that had passed, almost.
"Ah. I'm so full." Kook sighed as he spread out and leaned back on his hands. "Yeah same here, I'm sleepy too" I yawned, resting my head down on the table and peering at him.
"Yeah, food coma. Could sleep right now. Going home from here is so annoying". I propped my head up a little. He stared at me.
"You could just stay over. It'd be way easier than going home," I mumbled. I was sure he'd turn me down. Not once had he ever stayed over with me before... He hesitated for a moment, as though contemplating the suggestion.
"You sure? Wouldn't it be a bit... I dono, uncomfortable?" He asked. I shake my head. "Not for me, if it's weird for you then we can just put some pillows between us to divvy up the bed" I sat up, wondering if he would go for that. He bit at his lip before giving a tiny nod.
"Mm, if it's fine with you, then I'll just stay." Kook stood up and collected up our empty ramen bowls.
"Alright, you can borrow some of my clothes if you wanna shower," I offered, struggling to get onto my feet. I was feeling so full after that meal.
"Thanks. I'll clean up if you want to go first," he replied. "Okay, thanks Kookie" I took him up on his offer and get ready for bed first. As soon as I was finished, he went in next. I set up my bed and put a couple of pillows in the middle... It feels kinda weird but, honestly, I didn't know what else to do. Still, I couldn't sense how he felt about me. After today, it seemed like we finally could hang out like we used to... I didn't want things to go too fast. The last thing I wanted was for him to freak out and start being a jerk again...
I slipped on a singlet and shorts before laying in bed. Not long after Jungkook returned, fully dressed in a baggy jumper and track pants of mine that he'd borrowed. He looked so cute I had to hold back a giggle. He switched the light off, I felt the bed dip as he crawled into the space beside me.
"Goodnight Kookie," I whispered as I rolled over on my front and spread out to get comfy. I'd slid my hand under the pillow that was separating us.
"Night Jia," He replied, his voice soft and sleepy. The bed moved as he readjusted, I could hear him breathing softly. I closed my eyes as I lay there, for some reason I felt... Sad...
We were together but.. At the same time, how could we be this far apart... A light touch grazed my hand. I'd thought I'd imagined it but, as I felt a hand gently hold my own under the softness of the pillow, I realised that ...
Jungkook was holding my hand...
I don't know why this stirred my insides so much; it was sweet yet; it made my heartache at the same time. I gave his hand a light squeeze, hoping that he might not just be doing this in his sleep. But, when he squeezed back, it wasn't by mistake.
I drift off to sleep as I wrapped my heart in this small comfort the same way our hands gently held together.
Notes:
(๑•̀ᗝ•́)૭ Things are finally looking up! Woo~ Or are they?
Thoughts? Feelings? Predictions? ૮ ˶' ᵕˋ ˶ა♡
One last thing, I just thought I'd share my link in case anyone was interested in donating to support me, of course in no way do you have to! I love writing and being able to put out content that you enjoy no matter what! But if you were interested in treating me to a coffee just know I appreciate it 💜
https://ko-fi.com/g98782