PREGNANCY
"Hold up." JJ spoke pulling River back and she, Silas and Pope took back towards the van to comfort the girl, "Is it true?" JJ choked in disbelief he ran a hand through his hair and let out a breath.
"It's true." Silas answered for River and she turned to face away from the boy, it hurt her to think about him and Kie and just looking at him she could only remember the way he never denied loving Kie.
"So it's not mine then?" JJ suddenly blurted and everyone span on their heels to look at him confused, "It's Silas' right? That's why you ended things isn't it? because it's not mine." JJ laughed as if he had caught onto something he shouldn't have.
"No, dude it's not mine." Silas laughed, he found humour in him thinking that he'd actually had sex with River especially seen as the only reason they were friends in the first place was because of his deal. "We never had sex." He stated putting his hands up in surrender.
"I can't believe you think so little of me." River shook her head but JJ had softened now, it was almost as if it had finally sunk in what that meant and River became a whole load more important to him than ever before. "How does she know?" She spat turning to look at Silas knowing he was the only person who had known.
"Her parents kicked her out because Reggie went round and told them." Pope spoke up, they'd been able to get in a few conversations which was made much easier by Pope already knowing because Silas couldn't hold in a secret.
"So everyone knew before me? I was the last one and it's mine?" JJ questioned accusingly, he looked around in disbelief throwing his hands in the air like he was angry but really emotions were just flooding through his body.
"Because I didn't know what I was going to do." River argued back folding her arms across themselves and resting her hands on her stomach instinctively, "It's all my body my choice until you want to gatekeeper it."
"You can't get rid of a baby." Kie suddenly blurted from behind JJ, she'd obviously been listening to the conversation which angered River because now she felt as though the girl wasn't even meant to be part of the group any further, "You'd be killing a child."
"I'd be getting rid of a ball of cells, bitch, but what's it got to do with you?" River argued back and so JJ stood between them both and shook his head, he was going to support River no matter what and he hated that Kie had just openly told everyone about the baby as if she had any right to do so.
"Can we talk privately?" JJ asked River and she nodded and the boys mutually agreed to go off into the bonfire to enjoy the alcohol and freedom just a little longer. "This is pretty recent then, huh?" He asked softly.
JJ reached up to caress Rivers cheek, she allowed his warm palm to cover her whole side of her face and she enjoyed the contact.
It had dawned upon her that when Kie had told the whole bonfire about her pregnancy that the only person she wanted to run towards was JJ.
She couldn't be mad at him anymore because there was something much bigger going on with her and with the baby. Kie was no longer on her mind as were the thoughts of them together, all that mattered was the small thing growing in her stomach.
"I'm scared, JJ." River finally admitted but it was as vulnerable as he had expected, she was just calm and softly spoken, "I'm way too young for this, a baby, dude? That's a lot."
"I know, baby girl, I know." He hummed bringing her into his chest and swaying her from side to side the bonfire just a far away echo behind them, "I swear I'm going to be here for you and whatever you choose to do. Being without you- it's- it's broken me. Every second without you under my fingertips has been like a physical pain."
River nuzzled further into his chest, she appreciated his honestly and she understood now that he loved her and prioritised her with the way that he'd instantly headed for her and not Kie.
"I've missed you, JJ." She mumbled with her nose pressed into his shirt, her eyes had pooled with tears so when she pulled away he brought up the pad of his thumb to stroke them away. "Can we just stay like this a little longer please?" She croaked and JJ laughed,
"Of course."
The darkness quickly started to envelope them as they stood and they swayed and River knew in that moment as she looked up towards the sky that she had to make a big decision and either way it was going to rip her in two.
"Do you want to be a dad?" River questioned JJ, she craned her neck upwards to look at him and he leant down and gently pressed their foreheads together.
"Honestly? I want to be a way better father than mine so whenever you decide you want little me's running around I'm ready and set." JJ admitted which River liked, his answer wasn't pressuring and it wasn't there to make her feel guilty, it was straight from his mind with his heart on his sleeve.
"If I decide to keep it, you're going to promise you'll stick around?" River asked her eyes glistening in the moonlight, his pinky finger extended and he nodded,
"Promise."
wrote by lucidgravity