Being Muggleborn, Hermione didn't think it would be this difficult to not use magic...
Merlin, she missed it.
Three weeks without her wand.
And while she still attended class, she could only watch, dejected and envious as others practiced.
She continued studying for her N.E.W.T.S. but no longer raised her hand in class, preferring any and all attention away from her.
After being interviewed extensively by the Aurors, rumors were extensively swirling through the corridors of Hogwarts. Some were so bold enough to blame her but would then face the wrath of one Ginerva Weasley and her infamous bat-bogey hex.
After confirmation of Dennis Creevey and Cho Chang's involvement in the Prophet, Gryffindor and Ravenclaw houses became more subdued.
Everyone walked on egg shells around her and though Harry and Ginny tried, their voices were softer and their hesitancy noticeable.
Well, everyone except the Slytherins.
Pansy still argued about nearly everything, Blaise continued to be awkward and slightly inappropriate, Theo endlessly teased and pushed her academically, and Astoria was a quiet companion to study with in the library.
Draco however, was quieter than usual and withdrawn. He still held her every night, sat with her during class and meals, kissed her sweetly... but something was missing.
It'd been several days of worrying as she stared into the fireplace in their common room when it struck her.
Fire.
Passion.
Hermione chewed on her bottom lip, feeling anxious.
A lot has happened to him, and she scowled into the fire as her insecurities grew louder in her head.
Without magic, Hermione was practically a Squib. She was physically weaker and her mind could only handle so much at a time. Did he still want her?
She shook her head, looking down at her fidgeting hands.
This wasn't about her. And pitying herself would lead no where.
The common door opening had her quickly turning, a smile already playing at her lips but his expression changed her smile's trajectory.
He was occluding.
"Draco?" she asked quietly. "Come sit with me?"
Without a word, he dropped his book bag and did what she asked.
Hermione took a deep breath before she shifted onto his lap so she was straddling him.
A flicker of life behind his eyes was an encouraging sign
"How was your advising meeting with Slughorn?"
He absentmindedly began playing with her hair, wrapping a curl around his finger.
"Alright I supposed," he said quietly. "McGonagall and the Minister were there. "
"Kingsley?" she said, stunned. "Why was he there?"
He smiled sadly, only watching how he played with her hair. "Shouldn't be surprising, love. I was a Death Eater. Nothing I can do about it."
Hermione was surprised how she felt burning embers in the pit of her stomach. He sounded so sure and it made her angry.
"I'll make sure I clarify that I'm in love with a Death Eater then," she said coldly.
As if coming out of a confundus charm, he slowly blinked and his eyebrows furrowed.
He finally looked her in the eyes and, though he hid it well, she could see his surprise at her demeanor.
"What?"
"I'm a Death Eater's whore."
He violently flinched and his mouth opened and closed, looking for the words. She could see how he was slowly becoming angry, twisting her words to fit his self-loathing narrative.
Though she wasn't supposed to use magic until tomorrow, Hermione silently casted a sticking charm to Draco on the couch.
There was some discomfort in her chest, wandless magic had been risky, but otherwise she felt normal.
"Kneazle got your tongue?" she said with a smirk. "You're a Death Eater who fell in love with a Mudblood. Nothing we can do about it," she mocked.
Draco's anger was palpable and it was the most emotion she'd seen from him since waking up in the Hospital Wing.
"I don't have to listen to this," he muttered, but when he tried moving his expression turned perplexed.
"Having trouble?"
His eyes widened. "Did... Did you just do wandless magic?"
She shrugged lightly. "You're going to listen to what I have to say."
He scowled. "Not in the mood, Granger. Get off."
She raised an eyebrow. "I'm comfortable where I am, Malfoy."
"You-"
Hermione kissed him, putting as much emotion as she could into it. She was tired of being treated with fragility and desperately tried to convey this.
She pulled at his hair which elicited a deep moan from him and Draco finally started kissing her back just as hard.
His fingers dug into her waist as he held her and she purposefully grinded her body against his.
"Take the sticking charm off," he muttered against her lips.
Hermione pretended to think about it with a hum, rocking her hips.
Draco wrapped his hand into her hair and pulled harshly back before biting down on her neck hard.
"I won't ask again, Granger."
She released the charm and he immediately had them flipped on the couch, his hands holding hers over her head with a firm grip.
He must've saw something in her eyes because he didn't bother taking his time or being gentle. Instead, he vanished her clothes, turned her around, and positioned for her to be on her knees with her arse facing up.
Hermione could hear the zipper of his trousers, the shuffling in pushing them down, and her breathing turned erratic with anticipation.
She gasped when she could feel his cock teasing her entrance and without further warning, he was completely inside, his fingertips digging into her hips.
She yelled out as Draco emitted a loud moan and continued to shag her fast and hard without reservations.
This was what she wanted.
Gods she missed this.
It wasn't long when they both finished and he was maneuvering her back to straddling his lap. He wrapped his arms around her while she rested her head against his chest, listening to the staccato of his heart.
"Did I hurt you?" he murmured, chin resting on top of her head while he summoned a thin blanket to cover them.
She shook her head and nuzzled her face into his chest, holding him tightly to her.
"I've missed you," she said quietly and his breathing seemed to stutter, hold around her tightening
"I'm here," he breathed, lifting her chin so they were looking at each other.
Draco's face was so open, his silvery gaze gentle and bright.
She gave him a small smile and he gave one back, kissing her forehead.
"Can you tell me about the meeting now?"
He sighed, shuffling a hand through his hair.
"Kingsley asked if I'd want to be an Auror."
She blinked in surprise. "I - wow - what do you think?"
"I don't know, Hermione," he sighed, closing his eyes.
She chewed on her bottom lip. "I was asked if I'd be interested in a research position within the Auror Department."
His eyes shot open. "You never mentioned."
She shrugged. "You've been... distant, Draco. Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"
He grimaced. "Did Potter tell you what happened with Creevey?"
Of course he did. Because the Aurors told Harry much more information than they should for someone who wasn't even officially with the department.
Dennis had barely been recognizable with how severely he'd been beaten.
"He said you'd been in nothing but a towel," she finally said, her tone serious.
He rolled his eyes before his expression turned stern.
"I nearly killed him, Hermione. I was so close to torturing him with the Cruciatus Curse... I wanted to..." His jaw was clenched, his hands turning into fists on her back. "I don't regret any of it."
"But you didn't kill him nor use the Cruciatus," she huffed, her earlier irritation reappearing. "If you keep labeling yourself as a Death Eater then that's all you'll bloody be. You're more than that! You're a skilled wizard who will do anything for those you love. I don't care what the world thinks, but-" She held his face to emphasize her next words, his complete focus on her. "But I care how you see yourself. I won't stand for it. I won't stand by while you drown in -"
His mouth turned up to one side. "You've been spending too much time with Pansy and Theo."
"I love you, Draco." She leaned slightly back to reach for his forearm, the dark mark faded but visible. "All of you."
"I love you, too," he said quietly, resting his forehead against hers.
They stayed there for several moments holding one another before he eventually carried her to bed, worshipping and teasing her long into the night.
And as they were falling asleep, her body curled into his side, she knew their journey was only beginning.
***
"I felt graduation was a bit bland for my tastes," commented Theo, leaning against a large willow tree and continuously tossing his cap into the clear blue sky.
"These robes are ghastly," added Pansy, taking off her lilac robes and using it as a blanket to sit on the grass.
"Design your own, Pans," said Astoria softly with a smile. "You know you could."
Pansy shrugged, but Hermione could see she was turning the idea over in her mind while she absentmindedly patted the spot next to her for Hermione to sit.
They'd become closer the last couple months. Pansy had recently announced loudly to the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw tables if they didn't stop staring at her friend, she'd poison their goblets like Cho had done.
Though not the kindest way to go about it, she appreciated the sentiment. The tables had indeed stopped their staring whenever Pansy was near.
"Care if we join?" asked Harry, holding hands with Ginny, walking closer.
"Need a break from the autographs, Potter?" drawled Draco with a smirk, arm around her shoulders. "Hand out of practice?"
Hermione lightly hit his chest as Harry blushed. Theo suddenly had a coughing fit and missed catching his cap.
"Where we all headed now?" asked Blaise, a humming Luna under his arm.
"Hoping to get drafted on a decent team next season," said Ginny brightly, joining the loose circle they'd created.
"Wander Nott Manor until I get bored and get a job I supposed," said Theo with a shrug, continuing to toss his cap.
"Hermione and I are going to stay in your East Wing."
Theo caught his cap and turned sharply to stare at Draco, looking back and forth between him and Hermione.
"When did we discuss this?"
"We just did."
Theo scowled, but Hermione could see his eyes shining with amusement and relief at not being alone.
"No shagging in the kitchen."
Draco smirked. "You don't fancy a show?"
Hermione elbowed him hard as Theo laughed.
"Er - I'm going into Auror training next week," said Harry quickly, looking uncomfortable with the current topic. "You're going as well, Malfoy, yeah?"
Everyone turned to stare while Draco looked annoyed. "None of your bloody business."
He says he hasn't decided, but she knows he is greatly considering it despite being forced to train alongside Harry.
"How about you, Hermione?" asked Astoria, always polite.
"I'm undecided," she said, chewing on her bottom lip. "I've got quite a few job offers."
"From every department in the Ministry," muttered Pansy, rolling her eyes. "What about you, Blaise?"
"Luna and I are going to travel for a bit," he said, uncharacteristically smiling gently down at the Ravenclaw.
"No orgies during your adventures, I take it?" asked Theo, ignoring several looks of distaste.
"Ooh that's always an option," said Luna, nodding thoughtfully.
Blaise looked down at Luna with awe while nearly everyone rolled their eyes or laughed.
"Bloody made for each other, those two," muttered Draco, causing Hermione to snort.
"Erm- Hermione, can I have a quick word?"
Ron Weasley was standing nearby, a hand on the back of his neck, his ears bright red.
Nearly everyone was scowling and Draco gripped her waist tighter.
It'd been months since he'd even looked at her but if this was going to be the end of a friendship, she'd like a more sufficient closing.
"Alright, Ron."
Hermione gently removed Draco's arm, kissed him on the cheek, before nodding her head closer to the Black Lake for some privacy.
"You haven't looked at me in months."
Ron sighed, kicking at sand. "I know."
"And you've been a complete prat."
Ron nodded, looking down at his feet. "Yeah." He heaved a sigh before sitting down on the bank. "I haven't been a good friend to you, Hermione."
Hermione swallowed her surprise at his honesty and sat near him, but stayed silent.
"There's just - look," his expression was twisted in a scowl, one she recognized when he was getting frustrated with himself.
"Graduation and everything that's happened, I've been bloody stupid. And I'm no good at apologies, Hermione, you know this," he gave an embarrassed smile, his words sounding stilted and jumbled. "But I'm trying to say I'm sorry."
"I know, I know," he said quickly as Hermione just opened her mouth. "Actions speak louder than words and stuff."
Hermione smiled amused. "Where did this maturity come from?"
"Lav is pregnant," he blurted and Hermione could only stare, taken aback.
"And, blimey, I'm going to be a dad," Ron shook his head, his face mirroring her's. "I just... I gotta grow up sometime, yeah?"
Hermione tried not to roll her eyes at his logic, but touched his arm and gave him an appreciative smile all the same. "Thank you for apologizing."
He flashed her a sad smile. "I'll make it up to you somehow."
A clearing of someone's throat had them turning. Draco stood behind them, appearing bored, and looking devilishly handsome and fit in a Muggle suit.
"Everyone is meeting at the Three Broomsticks for lunch."
She nodded, and noticed how Ron was trying to bury his scowl.
They both stood and Ron appeared awkward now, rocking on his heels and avoiding Draco's piercing stare.
"I'll see you around, Hermione. Keep you updated, yeah?"
"Sure, Ron," she said with a smile.
He smiled back, and he had a brief fit attempting to nod at Draco before making his way back to the castle.
Draco rolled his eyes before holding out his hand for her to take.
"Ready, love?"
"Ready."
He kissed the top of her head while Hermione intertwined her fingers with his.
She was ready for their next adventure.