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YOU WERE FOUND on the doorsteps of Brooklyn Visions Academy, laughing with Inami. You decided to wait for Miles, seeing as she cooled you down. Smiling at something Imani said you give her a light shove and playfully tell her to stop when she says something you disagree with.
She rolls her eyes, "Girl I'm just saying. It's been years! That doesn't seem crazy to you. Like, this boy gottaaa be gay or sum."
You're quick to defend him, "Come on, he just doesn't see me in that way, y'know?" She gives you the look, a look that says 'rlly? you're kidding right?' And you just fold over with more laughter.
"Where is that boy anyways?" She then says looking around for him.
Your eyes scan the large crowd of students in front of you, and you see that he's just now getting out of his dad's car. Damn, did his dad give him a lecture or something why'd it take so long... "Oh, there he is." You point over to him standing on the tips of your toes.
Waving at him you give him a bright smile when you see that he's found you, and he returned the smile. Lifting his hand to wave back he goes to say something when—
"—You gotta say I love you back."
His words die on his tongue. You watch as the color drains from his face and he cringes as if he got a brain freeze. Your jaw drops in disbelief, there's no way this man was seriously doing this to him.
It's seven in the morning.
It's his son's first day at a different high school, not his fist day at kindergarten. You couldn't believe this was happening.
You watch as all eyes find Miles's figure, standing at the steps of the school horror-struck on his poor face. He spins around, "Dad are you serious?" He rushed out.
Imani nudges your shoulder a knowing smile on her face. You just turn to her asking her what without the words leaving your lips. She doesn't answer.
"I want to hear it!"
"You wanna hear me say-"
"I love you, Dad!"
"You're driving me all the way to school-"
The two go back and forth for what seems like hours you just stood there and watched, and you felt bad for Miles. You knew how easily embarrassed he gets, and this? This was just cruel. He took everything to heart and picked it apart in his mind piece by piece until it made sense to him. He stressed over the littlest things, this would make him the talk of the school, it was only his first day.
You watched as his back heaved and his head dropped. He let out a loud groan, "Dad. I love you." He grumbled out reluctantly. "That's a copy." Mr. Jefferson said with a smirk his eyes then found you and the realization hits you like a ton of bricks.
No, he wouldn't.
He looks you right in the eyes as he says, "Y/N I love you too." Of course, he did it. Your face blooms a dark red and you just stared mouth open, eyes wide. You were a deer in headlights. Miles rushed up to you. He grabbed your hand and tried to pull you through the school doors.
But it wasn't all that bad, no one knew he was talking to you. You were at the top of the stairs away from the car the only people who could have known were the ones that watch you both get out of the car.
You look up.
And find all eyes are on you or Miles.
Oh, so just about everyone.
Miles rolls his eyes and grabs your arm, pulling you through the doors fully. Imani follows with your forgotten book bag. "Sorry about that y'know how my dad is." You simply nodded and walked your way to class with Miles and Imani horrified.
"You couldn't have just told the man you love him and kept it pushin'?" Your eyes find him after recovering from the blow and he hears your words but he can't help but get offended by your tone.
"You don't get." He brushes you off.
You click your tongue and roll your eyes, "Yeah I guess I don't."
Imani has been standing by the entire time and she's tired of the bickering, she has better places to be.
"This has been nice and all but your girl gotta get to class. I'll catch you guys later at lunch right?" Your friend said with a nervous smile pointing behind her down the long hallway.
You break away from the heated glare you were giving Miles and turn to your friend, "Yeah, of course, love you. See you later." You hug her as if it was the last time you would see her. You never know what it could be. A lot can happen in eight hours, the building could blow up for all you knew.
"Love you too." She says, as your arms wrap around her you give her a small squeeze and you both let go. You watch as she waves bye to Miles and turns away going off to her class.
Turning to said boy you both start heading to your respective class. You both walk in a comfortable quiet that causally fell over you two. Your argument, if you would even call it that, is forgotten and dead. You guys were best friends, regardless of your crushes on each other. The bickering and teasing were always a constant when it came to you two.
Miles looks up to you with a question on the tip of his tongue, "Wanna get breakfast?" He asks,
"Nah, I don't eat breakfast anymore." Shrugging your shoulders you continue walking. Miles turns to you, face twisted up in all types of confusion, "Since when??" You love breakfast, you love food since when have you-"
"I don't know, recently though. It hurts my stomach." You say that so nonchalantly like it's normal not to eat in the morning. Why do girls do this to themselves? He will never understand how it's so easy for you guys to starve yourselves.
He goes on to comment, to say that you get crazier and crazier every day. When someone had to cut him off before he can do so the witty banter dying in his throat, forgotten.
"Hey, your shoes are untied." Miles looked down at his shoes in defeat and then looked back up with a fake smirk displaced on his lips, "Yeah I'm aware. It's a choice." If that sounded rehashed that's because it is. He has said that same thing for as long as you've known him.
Miles always forgets to tie his shoes.
So instead of just saying a simple thanks, retie them, and move on with his day. He doesn't tie them and says that corny comment.
You shake your head at the boy, arms crossed as he makes his way in front of you. He walks backward, probably not thinking before he acted like usual seeing as his shoes are untied, he faces you with a smirk.
"You're such a dumbass, come on we're gonna be late." Grabbing his arm you pull him to your classes.
"Come on we're gonna be late!"
"Shut uppp."
◌ ◌ ◌
The first half of the day was a struggle. Well, for Miles at least. You? You were living your best life out here. Classes seemed easy. All they wanted was for you to talk about your life.
English though, that class. Fuck that class. You had the most annoying English teacher to date. All that women talked about was ethnic diversity and race, it's exhausting. The first day and she gave the class a paper to read about Emmett Till, hello??
Why couldn't it be something, I don't know, happy? Exciting? There's so much good your community does and she picks one of the worse stories for the class to read and review. You could already tell that teacher and you were going to get along great.
But anyway. Back to Miles.
The poor guy couldn't seem to keep up with the new flow of the school. It seemed like his timing was off and his moves were uncertain.
You tried your best to help him but you didn't want to put your full focus on him because you would fall behind. And you were all for helping Miles but not at the expense of your future. He was old enough to help himself.
You couldn't always come to his rescue. He had to learn that.
The school moved fast, it was like an unspoken routine that was being followed. You somewhat got the hang of it but Miles, Miles didn't.
You, unfortunately, didn't share every class with him but when you did see him. Bookbag hanging loosely from his shoulders, shoes still untied, the nervous quirk he came to own when his anxiety was rushing through his bloodstream. You only saw in moments, and in every moment it looked like it got worse and worse.
You wanted to help him. You needed to help him. He needed you.
But you couldn't. Not when his class was on the other side of the school. Making it impossible for you to stop and say hi to him in the halls. You passed him in those blue halls like he was a stranger and it hurt. It hurt so much.
But you had to keep it pushing. It wasn't the end of the world. It was just school. It was just the first day, it'll get better.
You finally saw him. You were discreetly talking to a classmate when you saw him. He was late but who cares you got to see him.
Last period.
Your face bloomed into a smile and your heart raced when he walked through the door. His eyes locked with yours and he gave you a soft smile, in turn, making your insides bubble. You open your mouth to say something but your mouth closed shut when you remembered where you were.
It wasn't the time to talk.
You tell him with your eyes, you mouth to him that he needed to sit down before the teacher-
"Mr. Morales. Moving in the dark. You're late, again."
You couldn't help but sigh. Your poor Miles.
He stood up straight, books hanging loosely in his arms. Clearing his throat with an awkward smile he said, "Einstein said time was relative, right? Maybe I'm not late, maybe you guys are early." That's new. Huh...
He said that with his full chest and head held high. You laughed. You laughed in the quiet of the room. Miles was a fool but he was your fool. He locked eyes with you grateful for your laughter.
But then you heard another, you heard someone chuckle low under their breath your eyes dart to her and you find her sitting across the room from you. Short, blonde, bleached hair. "Sorry, it was just so quiet in here."
Quiet my ass.
You roll your eyes at the statement your happiness now dying and you put your chin on your hand, elbow on the desk. Who the fuck is that? "Would you like to keep standing there, or do you wanna sit down?" Ms. Calleros asked unpausing the film. And of course, the one empty seat is right next to her.
Your lucky day.
Wait?...
Is this jealousy?
You watch as Miles sits in the seat next to the girl that laughed at his joke, and as they started talking the smile on his face and the relief that floods his brown eyes. You can't help it, you can't help but get jealous.
She was a blonde-haired white girl how could you not?
Black guys always go for the ones with blonde hair and pale skin. So you knew, you knew then and there that you would lose him to her.
And for some reason, you weren't as afraid as you thought you would be. That doesn't mean it sucked any less.
You shouldn't jump to conclusions though. Doing that always ends with people getting hurt, for all, you knew that could be his next friend.
You can't let your feelings for Miles cloud your judgment about an innocent girl. You won't let your emotions take over your rational thinking.
So instead of stressing over the two that had smiles on their faces you sit back and watch the film, heartbreaking ever so slightly. But you told yourself it's okay.
Was it?
◌ ◌ ◌
Knocking on Miles's door you stand outside your stance uncertain. It was his first night in the dorms so you wanted to check in on him... and maybe ask him about the girl from the eighth period.
What? You can't help it, you're whipped for one Miles Morales. If all it took was to smile, laugh at his jokes, and have blonde hair then maybe you could make those changes...
What- No. You won't change yourself so he'll be interested in you romantically, what the fuck is wrong with you today?? You shook your head getting those thoughts out of your mind.
You were about to knock again when his door swung open. The shock on Miles's face turns into a smile the same smile you loved. "Hey, just wanted to check in on you, I uh, know you had a long day." He just stood there love-struck by you his eyes locked onto every feature on you.
Your hair, fresh from the shower you took before heading here, your skin soft and radiant. Dark orbs looking at him, shining.
"Miles?"
He snapped out of his trance and locked eyes with you again. "Do you- do you wanna uh go to Uncle Aaron's with me?" He said reaching for his neck trying to get a nervous rub in.
"Of course."
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CELESTIAL PARADOX
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