First of all, i sm so sorry for the delay guys. I had Last exam on 18 and then after evam I went out with my friends. I was so tired by the time I returned. Then yesterday I got my periods and the cramps were killing.
Anyway I hope you all are fine. I hope you enjoy this part.
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It had been an hour since you sat by the window staring blankly at the beautiful garden surrounding the mansion.
Though your eyes were set on the colourful rows of dancing flowers your mind was a mess. There was just so much happening and you were overwhelmed with it.
All the chaos with pregnancy, situation with Namjoon and now your alleged new family. And on top of everything you were missing You terribly. It had been a week since he went to Lily's place which reminded you he is supposed to come back tomorrow.
You walked back to the big soft bed where your phone was lying. You need to tell her everything plus she needs to drop Yun here tomorrow. You still hadn't told bam about Yun but with all honesty you two had barely spoken 2 words since morning. Anyway you were pretty sure he knew about him considering he hired someone to check on you.
Your actions halted the moment your wallpaper appeared.
It was a cute picture of the three of you.
Namjoon you and Yun.
Your mind flew back to the day this picture is from.
Namjoon had returned home very tired that day, it was a really busy and tiring day . He had a headache so you offered to give him a head massage. You were sitting on the couch and he was on the floor still his head was almost reaching your face. A few minutes later Yun also came down after finishing his homework and demanded a massage. You often gave him head massages.
So he sat on Namjoon's lap and Namjoon was massaging Yun's head while you did his. It was such a cute moment.
It almost felt as if you three were a family.
Almost.
One after the other tears began rolling down your pink cheeks.
Why? Why did you let your guards down, idiot! It's no one but yours fault. You are the only one responsible for your misery.
No, I can't do this! I can't fucking break down! I can't become weak. If I become like this what will happen to Yun? I can't let him see this side of me.
One day, cry all you want today Yn, you have today to do anything you want from tomorrow you need to go back to being the tough single mom you had been forever for your son. You can't cry over a man. Not when you have your son depends on you.
Taking a last look at his smiling face on your home screen you changed it back to a childhood picture of Yun playing in a garden. It was a reminder for you, to be strong, to stay focused.
With the constant tears numerous thoughts came to your mind. Whatever happened yesterday, whatever Namjoon did, you weren't exactly angry at him. You were more hurt and upset.
I don't want to be angry or blame bhim for anything when he hasn't made any mistakes. I was insensitive and naive, even after i know how much he was hurt broken and devastated because of that woman, how much it has affected him mentally I decided to act like some stupid jealous teenager when I had no right. It must have already been so startling for him to see her after so long and then I did something so silly I don't blame him for acting the way he did. If any thing I am glad about everything that happened, at least it woke me up from my stupid fantasy. Him and I aren't possible. He deserves so much better, someone who is worth him, someone who is as reputed and good like him. No some lowlife like me.
With that you closed your diary wiping your tears.
-
It was late when you woke up, seeing the setting sun you could figure out it was evening. You didn't realise when you had fallen asleep and now you were hungry. You hadn't eaten anything. But before anything you needed to fix yourself, there was no doubt you looked horrible, you could still feel the dried tears on your cheeks.
-
Thankfully Bam did show you the kitchen in the morning so it wasn't hard for you to find it, the kitchen was just attached to the living room where you noticed Bam was sitting working on his laptop and he hadn't noticed your presence yet.
You were glad that he gave you your space and didn't disturb you despite being home.
You cleared your throat to make your presence noticable and thankfully he did.
"Oh yn you.. you are up? You haven't eaten anything right? Let me ask the maid to prepare your food" he gave you a small smile .
You were pretty sure he noticed your face judging how he took a good glance at it for a minute. Well it wasn't that hard to understand you were a mess from your pale face and big puffy eyes but thankfully he didn't ask anything .
"It's okay, i will prepare-"
"No yn, you don't have to , especially you know now that you are..uhm p.. pregnant. Come sit here and if you have anything you specifically want tell me I will get that made" he said pointing at the one of the couch.
"No, anything is fine." You replied with a small smile, sitting on the couch he pointed.
You saw a young woman not older than 30 come into the kitchen , Bam went and told her something to which she nodded and began doing something in the kitchen.
"Yn she is Rosy, she is the cook here . She will bring your food in a few minutes and from now whenever you want to eat anything you can ask her. I am going back to my room which is two doors next to yours , in case you need anything you can come to my room or call me. "
After receiving a small nod from you he collected his stuff and went upstairs.
-
Bam heaved a long sigh once he was finally inside his room. He threw his stuff on the bed in frustration.
Your misery was in front of him, he could tell you weren't fine. He so badly wanted to be there for you but he just didn't know how. How was he supposed to help him without making you uncomfortable? He didn't even know if you needed his comfort.
-
You were sitting on the garden bench, you didn't have anything better to do. You were done dwelling and crying, you wanted to distract yourself now. You had already told Lily that you were here, surprising enough she didn't seem that surprised. Instead she just told you she will talk tomorrow and asked to send her the location.
"Bored?" You saw Bam take the seat on the bench making sure to leave some distance.
"No, I just wanted to get some fresh air," you shrugged.
It was silent again, both of you enjoying the cool breeze and the beautiful view.
"Uhmm.. can I ask you something?"
"You can ask me anything yn."
"Uhm... That day when you came to meet me... You said that you and your mom- i mean uhm -"
"Yn you don't have to force yourself for anything, you can address us however you feel comfortable. I don't mind. "
You gave him a warm smile thankful he understood your hesitation.
"So you said she moved here too right? But uhm i didn't see her. Does she live somewhere else?" You asked, looking at him.
He chuckled. "No yn, she lives here only and believe me even if she lived in any other part of Korea she would come running on hearing the news of you arrival but she isn't in Korea right now. The day I came to meet you, next morning she had to fly for US for her regular check up. She has to go every 3 months. We didn't expect you to agree so soon or else I am sure she wouldn't leave. In Fact I told her about you just now and she wanted me to book the next flight but i somehow managed to convince her to complete the check up. Tomorrow it will be done."
You nodded. It felt really nervous but at the same time there was an anticipation to meet her to see her, the woman that brought you into this world.
"Is..is she alone there? I mean you said she is still not fully healthy so is it safe to send her alone for check up? She could get checked here too. I think korean health facilities are good enough"
Bam felt happy seeing the care in your eyes, he didn't even hide the smile that formed on his lips.
"Don't worry. She isn't alone. I will never send her alone. One of my very close friends is just like a brother to me and even mom adores him. Plus the doctor... she..she is my friend and she is very close to mom too. Mom insisted on getting checked only by her. So I couldn't deny it."
It again fell silent but it was not uncomfortable. Bam was happy about the progress . Even if it was a small talk, you started a conversation. You were willing to let them in your life and be part of theirs.
"Yn... I am your brother, and I want you to know that even if things are complicated right now, you and mom mean the world to me and I will always be there for you. You aren't alone. You can talk to me anytime about anything. I will be there to listen. You can ask me anything. Don't ever hesitate, please."
You looked at him, maybe it was your pregnancy at least you will blame it for the moistness in your eyes.
"Sorry i know it's not the time for it but i can't help it....i.. I am craving some cheese cake"
Bam let out a small chuckle seeing you pout, you looked adorable.
"Don't be princess. Let's get but firstt.... Wear this"
He took out his jacket and covered you before taking you to his car. The night was chilly.
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I haven't proof read so you are welcome to point out any mistakes you see.
(Yoo Bam)
(Just to give you all an idea, this is the image i have of Bam . You are free to imagine anyone you like)
Don't forget to vote and comment.
I love y'all.
Stay safe and healthy