Sitio Series 3: Scheming List

Epilogue

G R E M O R Y

"Dito na tayo titira," nakangising ani mama. "Hmm," pagsusuri niya sa kabuuan ng lugar. Parang compound ang dating may tatlong bahay na malalaki at hektaryang lupain.

Sa harap ng higanteng gate na para bang ang hirap hawakan dahil sa kulay ginto nitong itsura. Lunok laway kaming magkahawak kamay ni mama papasok, hindi na ako magugutom tapos kasama ko pa si mama.

Gusto kong kasama si mama..

Kaharap ang lalaking nakaporma ng mamahaling damit ngumiti ito nang makita kami ni mama.. Saglit nagtama ang paningin namin, mukha siyang mabait..

Nakangiti ang lalaki at nilapitan si mama. "Fiona," tawag nito. "I'm happy that you finally decided about my proposal." Tumango si mama at mahinang tumawa. Iginaya kami nito sa loob ng malaking bahay ito kasi ang unang pagkakataong nakatapak ako sa ganitong kagandang bahay ang sabi kasi ni mama ay huwag basta-basta papasok sa mga lugar na mukhang mahal..

Magkahawak kamay pa rin kami ni mama habang sinusundan ang lalaki, tumingala ako, ang mga mata ni mama parang nakakatakot... Parang malungkot... Bakit? Ayaw niya ba akong makasama?

Ang bait niya... Sabi ni mama siya na ang bagong papa ko lagi niya kasi akong binibilhan ng toys pero malungkot pa rin ako.. Si mama kasi hindi ko kasama sa malaking bahay.
Parang ako lang mag-isa.

"Bago ka rito? Ikaw siguro bago naming kapatid no?" Tanong ng kaedaran kong bata habang dinidribble ang bola sa malaking garden, nakaupo sa may duyan may playground kasi sa bahay na 'to at lahat ng nakatira ay kapwa ko bata. Tatlong bahay kasi lahat ang meron iyong isa hindi ko alam kung para saan, habang iyong sa isa roon lagi si mama at itong pangatlong bahay puro bata kagaya ko.. "Bait ni papa, no? Binilhan kami toys!" Tumango ako 't nanatiling tahimik.

Mabait nga siya pero masakit sa heart niaagaw niya kasi si mama..

"Ayaw mo sali sa amin?" Tanong niya habang pinupunasan ang tumutulong sipon, umiling ako. "Ikaw bahala sabi ng mama ko bawal lalaro rito e, kaso kita ko daming bata naglalaro kaya gaya ako sakanila.." Patuloy niyang sabi.

Maraming bata, mukha silang happy. Pwede siguro ako makipag friends hindi naman magagalit siguro mama ko, no? Tatampo lang kasi ako 'di niya ako dalaw dito sa bahay... Pero love ko pa rin siya.

"Okay, tara. Ano lalaro natin?"

"Edi ball!"

Sinapo ko ang noo sa konsimisyon kay Genevorld ang sabi ay invited kami sa party mamaya pero heto siya at nagtatatakbo. "Genevorld!" Saway ko, "isa! Madudumihan ka!" Nang mapansing tumaas na ang boses ko'y takot itong tumigil sa pagtakbo at napirmi sa iisang lugar pagkuwanay binalingan ko naman si Genevieve sa tabi ko na masayang nilalaro ang teddy bear na regalo ko sakanya.

Inosente akong binalingan ni Genevieve. "Kuyaaa," kalabit nito sa akin. "Tatanong aku.." Anito.

Inayos ko ang pagkakatirintas ng buhok nito, "hmm?"

Nakanguso na siya ngayon dahilan para kitang-kita ang tambok ng kanyang pisngi.. "Kapag hawak pepe mo dapat happy ka?" Ano? Muntik ko nang masapok si Genevorld ng bigla siyang sumulpot sa pagitan namin ni Genevieve. "Di ba? Sabi ko rin 'yan kay kuya ko Gene!" Masaya niyang sabi.

Napaangat ako sa pagkaka-upo at lumuhod sa harap nito. "Genevieve bad iyan." Pinipigilan ang sariling magalit. Hindi ko alam kung saan niya napulot ang mga bagay na 'to, "saan mo narinig iyan?"

Tumingala si Genevieve. "Kay ninong!" Sagot nito. Napaatras ako, "kuya glemoly galit ka?"

Ninong... Isang tao lang ang tinatawag na ninong no Genevieve at iyon si papa pero malabong sabihin ni papa ang mga bagay patungkol sa maseselang tema tulad nito. Baka na misinterpret lang ni Genevieve ang lahat, oo ganoon siguro tutal limang taong gulang pa lang siya kaya natural lang na magkamali sa naririnig. "Genevieve," hinawakan ko ang maliliit nitong kamay maging si Genevorld na tahimik lang na nakikinig sa akin ay inabot ko ang mga kamay. "Lagi mong tatandaan Genevieve ang katawan mo sa iyo lang 'yan, 'wag mong hahayaang may hahawak niyan kahit sina kuya pa o ninong o mama.. Ikaw lang ang pwede kaya sumbong mo sa amin ni Kuya Gene mo kung sino ang humahawak sa iyo ah?"

Ngumiti siya katulad ng isang tahimik na luntiang palayan.. Malawak, tahimk at nakakaenganyang tignan. "Okay kuya! Love kayo ni vive!"

Deep inside my heart something isn't right from family tradition, social norms, and morality. I was nine years old when I found everything out, I was enlighten. Those children aren't my siblings because first of all Genco Lajañas isn't my biological father. My Mother Fiona Santillan was impregnated by the notorious womanizer Giorgio Lajañas the older brother of Genco Lajañas and I'm their child, the fruit of sinful affair.

The mess up relationship continued when my mother decided to be one of the mistresses of Genco Lajañas and like his brother he has the habit to collect woman like they're sort of trophies to brag about however I didn't resent him for that because he was too kind even though he knew I was just his nephew, he took care all of the children here and the other women.

There are total five woman living on the other mansion if they share similarities that is they're willing to give themselves just to win the favor of Genco Lajañas, he's rich beyond rich, he has connections and was really kind.

Under this masion I lost count of the children entering every month although it kind of creep me when I couldn't find the others. Kagaya nalang ni Mark na kasama kong lumaki sa mansyon na 'to mag-iilang buwan ko na siyang hindi nakikita. Wala akong balita kung saan siya nagpunta o kung ano na bang nangyari basta nalang na nawala na para bang bula.

I have Genevieve and Genevorld now, they're my family. My mother Fiona probably forgotten about me, she didn't even took a glance at her own son we're living at the same place and yet she was too far to reach. The unfamiliar warmth that I was yearning was found on someone else tragically it wasn't my mother.

Life sucks, then you die.

I received countless of expensive gifts along with my brother and sister. Genco praised me so much because of my intelligence on hacking it felt good when a person appreciate your worth, he began to take me with him on social gatherings, meetings and others. He even introduced me as his own son that made me really, really delighted.

"Kuya," Genevieve called my name, I tucked her to bed and sang her lullaby. "Love ka vive..." She sleepily murmured. "love, love kayo vive..." She's yawning adorably that made me want to pinch her cheeks but I stopped myself.

Genevorld is sleeping on the other side of the matress. We're now at Genevieve's room, panay kasi ang iyak nito at sumbong tuwing matutulog na. May kanya-kanya kaming kwarto sa malaking mansyon na 'to at kami ni Genevorld ay napagpasiyahang magsama nalang habang si Genevieve dahil babae ito'y mag-isa sa kwarto.

"Kuya, tucked vive on sleep.. Kuya I'm scared there's a monster on the door.. Kuya, please.." Those were her words every night and now, we were persuade well. Kaya narito kami ngayon sa lapag ni Genevorld habang sa kama mag-isang matutulog si Genevieve.

"We love you too," I replied."Kuya will protect you from those monsters.."

She bat her eyelashes and pouted. "Kuya will you buy me a barbie doll? I saw one!"

I patted her butt in able to let her sleep, her eyes slowly closed. "When kuya is done with his classes you, Genevorld and I will go to mall.. Kuya will treat you two and buy you a lot of toys..." I said.

"I.. lorvu.. kuyas.."

At last she was asleep I stood and went besides Genevorld, I took the blanket and lay down. Pasara na sana ang mata ko ng may narinig akong mga yapak ng paa, biglang naalerto. The room was dark and only the lampshade beside Genevieve is the source of light, nakarinig uli ako ng ingay na para bang may binubuksan pagkuwanay natigil ito at nawala rin..

It's creepy.

And because of that day we began to sleep together every night.

I had a nosebleed when I looked at the clock it was passed twelve midnight, I took a deep breath and wipe it with the tissues. Walang pahinga parang nabibiyak ang ulo ko sa sakit maging ang mga mata ko ay parang sinisilaban sa sakit. I started to work under the screen at seven am and now it's twelve midnight I haven't finished the job that papa gave me.

I need to prove my worth in able to stay, I need to succeed this work. I caught just a similar glimpse of my mother's reflection on the glass door. I laughed at myself. Am I hallucinating because of lack of sleep?

"Gremory." Napaiktad ako sa narinig boses nga ng nanay kong naka roba at walang emosyong nakatingin sa akin. "Hindi ka pa ba tapos?" Napayuko sa tuno at pamamaraan ng pagsasalita nito, naiinis dahil hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin ako makapasok sa web Interpol? O dahil nag-aalala siya?

Malabo. Malabong mag-alala siya sa akin dahil sa loob ng ilang taon ni hindi niya man lang ako nagawang puntahan o kausapin man lang kung hindi dahil sa mga party or gatherings e, hindi ko siya makakakita o makakausap.

Ibinalik ko ang tingin sa computer, tipid na sumagot. "Malapit na." Hindi ko na siya nilingon pero rinig ko ang tunog ng upuan siguro'y naupo ito at sinisiguradong matatapos ko ang trabaho. Niyakap kami ng katahimikan tanging ang maingay na pagtipa ko sa keyboard ang maririnig.

Tulog na kaya si Genevieve at Genevorld? Pumili ako ng door locked hinabilinan ko silang dalawa na ilock ang pinto tuwing matutulog naroon man o wala ako. I don't know my instincts are telling me that it was the right choice to do, I cannot trust the other kids.

"Malabo na ang mga mata mo." Biglang komento nito, nagtataka ko siyang nilingon. "Ang lapit mo sa monitor kulang nalang magpalit kayo ng mukha." I felt something kicked my chest my mother wasn't the sweetest ever since. "Tapusin mo na iyan at magpahinga bukas sumama ka sa akin ipapagawa kita ng salamin." My mouth was gaped open at her words.

When my mother walked out, I was barely holding back those tears.. It felt nice my mother haven't really forgotten me. At dahil doon ay magana akong nagtipa upang matapos ang trabaho inabot ako ng dalawang oras bago makapasok. I stole some files that papa told me and saved them as well as to destroy every trace I made.

Natapos ako at papatayin na sana ang monitor ng masagi ko ang mouse natigil ito sa tapat ng sinave kong files. Biglang nagtaka, nilalamon ng kuryosidad.

I convinced myself not to but I lose. "I'll just take a peek." I read everything it was a record of transaction that I couldn't understand, names of people and pleace as well as information.

Gremory, know your place. I reminded myself and shut my eyes off to forget what I saw.

Stunned. Astonished. I wasn't paranoid however my mother suddenly appeared in front of our rooms the next morning, wearing her expensive attire she roamed her eyes at our room. Natataranta akong pumasok sa banyo at kahit lutang pa'y biglang naligo. Tulo laway pa si Genevorld sa lapag habang si Genevieve ay nagtatakang nakikipagtitigan sa nanay ko. I went inside the bathroom wearing a black pants and simple plain shirt. My mother is now sitting at edge of the bed staring at the talkative Genevieve.

"Wow! Sasama mo po Vive? Wow!" Her eyes were twinkling in happiness. "Mama namin ni kuya Gene po punta na heaven e, sabi sa akin kuya ko po love ako ni mama ko kahit iwan niya kami rito.. Kayo po love niyo po si kuya ko glemoly?" I wanted to interfere yet I also wanted my mother's answer.

Mama smiled gently and stroke Genevieve hair. "Always remember that there's no mother who doesn't love her children.." Simple but the words are sinking deeply into me.

Ilang minuto rin ay nagising si Genevorld na sa una'y nag-eskandalo pa. Inalalayan ko si Genevieve ng matapos itong maligo binihisan ko siya't tinirintasan matiyagang nanonood si mama sa amin. After that we went outside my mother planned to go straightly to the clinic for my eyes but with fortunate inconvenience we headed to the mall. The four of us, Genevieve was giggling non-stop while tugging my mom's dress to take her to the doll shop and of course me and Genevorld are standing there like a bodyguard.

Genevorld. "Kuya," he called me. "My mom's father wants us to stay with him," there's a hint of sadness on his tone. "But kuya we don't want to be far away from you.. He said staying at our father's place is dangerous however I don't think so.. My dad treat everyone with kindness even mom passed away..."

I sighed. Frankly speaking we're first cousin. As I've said I'm a offspring of my mother and Genco Lajañas older brother-Giorgio Lajañas while Genevorld and Genevieve are biological children of Genco Lajañas on one of his mistress so basically we're cousins although that is our true connection I treat them as my own siblings.

We roamed around the mall. It was hard to stop my smile from forming this is a day to be treasured because we really look like a family. We ate at a fancy restaurant, we went at the arcade, we bought dolls for Genevieve and shoes for Genevorld and lastly went on the hospital to get my eye check.

My eye grade were high that's why immediate glass are needed. It was my mother who personally put them on my face. My heart skip a beat, I felt like I was in the ninth cloud. This eye glass are my mama's first present..

I mouthed my thank you at her when we got home. As usual she needs to stay at the mansion and us to the other one. Holding both of my siblings hand, mama suddenly called my name.

"Gremory." I glanced at her with confusion. She didn't uttered any words and stayed there staring at me intently.

Frowning, I asked. "Po?"

She smiled as the wind blew, "i love you.."

At night when the cold breeze blew between us my mother told me the words I yearned for as I received my first gift from her..

And I couldn't as for more.

Papa tapped my shoulders with his proud smile, he looked completely happy as he stood there and showered me praises. "You're really a genius as expected from my son." He said, I smiled a little.

He entrusted me much work than expected because of the successful work last time he continued to give me more and as the result of my hard work that smile never left his lips. Anyway, because of it I'm unable to be with my siblings. I spent much time on the office room with my monitor and bunch of laptop and in the past few weeks I'm sleeping there.

With that Genevieve and Genevorld are left alone, I'm worried about them, I don't know why but I felt uneasy every damn time. I couldn't get my hands off this work because they're continuing to multiply. This day since there will be a meeting I can freely do whatever I want.

Malalim na ang gabi ng makaalis ako sa opisina, nilakad ang kabuuang hallway. Hindi na ako natatakot sa ganito tila nasanay na sa dilim, I heard a groan from nowhere. I stilled, what's that? I pretended not to here anything but it kept on being loud instead of heading to my siblings room I found myself walking towards the noise direction.

Carefully and steadily in the basement secret room, no one knows this place aside from my father, his friends, his mistresses, the butler and me. I accidentally found this strange room when I was young this is where Mark always telling me that this very same room are eating the children that's why the number were decreasing.

"T..Tama na po.. Ah.." I froze on the spot, I peeked at the slightly opened door. "Ah.." He groaned again in pain as his lifeless eyes were tearing non-stop.

I know them.. They're those men with my father awhile ago, he called them his clients and even bragged me to them..

Bending and thrusting to the young boy, the man choked him. I wanted to vomit, I suddenly had a cold sweat. "Tuwad! Puta! Tuwad, malaki ang ibinayad ko para rito!" He continued.

Animal.. They're animals..

That boy.. That very same thirteen year old boy like me that is also living on the same mansion, he was Genevieve playmate that she also calls kuya was being force to this sexual activity based on how he react... I teared up, stopping myself from puking it felt there's a lump on my throat, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think straightly.

"T..Tama na po... T-Tama na.."

"Tuwad!"

He begged and begged until his lifeless eyes and mine met.. I stood and forced myself to ran away, he mouthed something. My conscience ate me.

Help me.

He said. Too shock or I was just running away to save myself from them? Why? What is that? What the heck is this place? How? How this thing happening? I thought this place was safe.. I thought it only has rainbows but underneath was an ugly storm.

My knees gave up as I ran fastly away from the basement, I sat pathetically on the ground where the playground is. I coughed and puked my saliva, my chest was clenching as if it was malfunctioning.

"Gremory..." I stilled at the voice, my saliva, and tears are mixing when I glanced at the person who said my name. "Did you see?" She asked.
Unable to talked a just cried. "Forget what you saw. Pretend not to know everything until I said enough."

H-How could I?

She kneeled to level herself on mine. "M-Ma?" I said as she cupped my cheeks, there's no hint of emotions. It was void.

Mama, once again gave me that kind of face.. The face she gave me when my father died and when me went on this place. "Forget everything. Play dumb. Survive. That's the only way, Gremory.." She smiled and walked away, leaving me in a worst state. I sidestepped into the playground, keeping my back resting on the wall.

I'm wide awake yet I had a nightmare.

Weeks had passed, I couldn't function properly. The scene kept kn repeating on my mind, eversince that night the boy vanished all of a sudden without any trace. Children are saying he went to other place and became rich.. But it wasn't... I knew the truth.

When I came back to our room where Genevieve and Genevorld are it felt strange. My sister was laying down on the bed she was deeply asleep without Genevorld.. What happened? Where is he? I clearly told him not to let Genevieve alone!

"N-No... M-Monster... H-Help..." Genevieve uttered on her sleep.

I trembled. I gasped for air, the air is suffocating me..

"Help me.."

Pikit mata kong sinunod ang sinabi ni mama pero ito ba ang kapalit na halos araw-araw akong pinaparusahan? Why? There were deep circles under my eye indicating I hadn't gotten any good sleep, my weight dropped and every damn time I opened my eyes amd mouth I felt like I wanted to vomit.

I felt a twinge of guilt, I shooked my head calming myself before sitting across Genevieve and tapped her butt to hummed her to sleep. "I'm sorry..." I whispered, a thing caught my eye, a stained on the blanket. Did she eat on the bed again? Unfortunately, I'm not in the shaped to scold her so I'll let this slide.

Footsteps. "Kuya." It was the voice of Genevorld.

I glanced at him, he looked stressed. "Why?" I timidly replied.

The look on his face was saying he was betrayed, sadness and angst. "Aalis ka? Iiwan mo kami?"

Right, because of that night I was urged to left just for a week. I want to seek for a peace of mind, I'm sorry for him, I'm sorry for myself. Entanged on this scheme. I wanted to break free.

Ignorance is a bliss.

Unending ignorance kept us believe such a good life... But the truth was far from what we imagined and now it pained me knowing them bits by bits.

Apologetically. "I'm sorry.. Isang linggo lang naman.. Mag-iisip lang ako, bantayan mo si Genevieve.. Babalik ako," with tears on my brother's eyes he ran away, clenching his hands.

I promised them I won't leave like their mother... I left out a part of me, I'll find a way to escape with them.. I will.

Just wait for me... Please.

The only way to get out is to used that girl named Rafiya, daughter of one of my father's friend. She looks like a typical country side girl who used authority to step on others. Whenever she's on this mansion I keep on noticing her intense stares, one time when I was tapping on my computer she suddenly appeared.

"Hi," she shyly said. Her physique was delicate and she looks like kind. "I'm Rafiya.."

I stared at her hand before accepting it. "Gremory," she, once again, flashed a wide grinned like she hit a jackpot.

Rafiya was such a innocent and cheerful child reminding me of my sister Genevieve. "I really like you Gremory! Let's be a good friends!" I nodded.

Since that day we gotten used of each other. Napadalas ang pagdalaw nito sa mansion dahilan para malimutan ko ang mga masasamang alalala na pilit kong tinatakasan. Genevorld remained silent each time our crossed paths, I heard he was called by his father and started to train martial arts for unknown reason and now, Genevieve is a lone but I guess there won't be any problems because in this place their father is kind and will protect them.. It doesn't really matter if I leave because I know they're safe.

Rafiya always bring photograph from her place, it was weird but when I got the chance to see it I was stunned. The name is Sitio Ibuka/Buka right? Everytime she visits me here it felt refreshing..

Titling her head, Rafiya leaned towards me and with a swift move she gave me a peck on my lips. "Gremory gusto mo bang bumisita sa lugar ko?" I held her warm hands, I nodded. Flustered by her actions.

At that time I was drowned by the simple gestures and with those kindness they've shown.. Once again, I was pulled into it, tied into those hidden schemes.

My father agreed to let me go with Rafiya. Speaking of that girl I began to notice that she's becoming clingy to the point it was invading my privacy, she pressured her father to let me go with them for a vacation. At the very least, I was hesitant. Ni hindi ko man lang nagawang magpaalam sa mga kapatid ko.

It was selfish alright but it this way I had the opportunity to think of the plan how we will escape that mansion. My papa-Genco Lajañas wasn't suspicious of me, he remained kind and that's what keeping me afterall those people are the one who did the wrong deed not my father.. I must warned him, he's trusting the wrong people.

"Gremory!" Rafiya ran with a flower crown on her head. "What is that?" She trembled, nabitawan ang basket na hawak ng makita ang traveling bag na hawak.

I smiled apologetically at her, "I think it's time for me to come back.. I wanted to see my siblings, I haven't heard about them in the passed few weeks besides last monday was Genevieve birthday.." I said.

Nagulat ako ng bigla nalang siyang napaupo. Ang mga luha niya ay isa-isang pumatak dahilan para mataranta ako. "Aalis ka? But I like you! No, I love you! Don't go! Stay with me! Stay here!" Rafiya began to throw tantrums that was hard to handle. The maids came running, holding her but she slaps their hand and came towards me begging with tears..

I shooked my head, "Rafiya I'll just check my siblings.." Her eyes became detailed, I step back. The way she looks at me was frightening, "Rafiy---" I couldn't finish what I'm saying when she cupped my face and forcedly let me stare at her.

I groaned in pain when her ling nails scratched my cheeks. "Akin ka Gremory.. Akin ka... Akin ka lang!" Slowly, the peace of mind I hardly maintained was gone.. All I can see is a girl... A terrifying girl, gone the innocent and kind girl I know.

She's insane.. They're insane..

I bearly escape their residence with the help of nanang Baby—the old maid on their mansion. Panting I entered the mansion whom the reason why I ran away.. It felt gloomy, the weather was also bad.. The sky was filled with heavy clouds.

I walked through the entrance towards the mansion where we resided, it was normal. Kids playing around, I climbed at the stairs on our bedrooms. My siblings aren't there. I frowned, where are they?

I started to panic when I saw Genevieve room a mess.. "Genevieve?! Genevorld?!" I screamed and screamed the kids who recognize me where avoiding my gaze.

What the hell happened when I was away?

I began to panic, desperate to find my siblings. I saw him, my father's butler he was standing by a disgust expression towards me. "Master Gremory." Madiin ang tawag niya sa ngalan ko, damang-dama ang galit at pandidiri.

I glared at him. "Where's my siblings?!" I hissed.

The butler smirked. "You mean your cousins? Huwag mo na silang pag-aksayahan ng panahon at sumama ka sa akin para sa mga naiwan mong trabaho." He held my hand strongly and dragged me.

I fought but what can a twelve year old boy do?

"Fuck! Tangina nasaan ang mga kapatid ko?!" Sigaw ko habang pilit na lumalaban.

Carlos was like a metal that is hard to bend. "You left, Gremory. The master needs you to finish your pile up works."

"Tangina! Alam ko kung nasaan ano? Nasaan sila?!"

"Huwag mo na silang hanapin."

I was swept with that force, I cried desperately there was like a thing punching my insides. Afraid, guilty, hatred, angst. A pair of heels stopped at my front, I looked up, it was my mother looking at me without any expression. "Carlos." Once of hopw arises on me by seeing her. "Let him go. I'll talk to Genco regarding this." She said, Carlos-the head butler had no choice but to obey to the mistress.

Seconds went on continuously. My mother remained standing looking down at me, I began to tremble at the way she sees me. "Go away, Gremory. Umalis ka at 'wag nang magpapakita sa akin kahit kailan.." Tinalikuran ako nito at naglakad papaalis.

I clenched my fist as I bit my lower lip. "Tatalikuran mo na naman ako?! Kailangan kita pero wala kang ginawa kung hindi lumakad papaalis tapos kakalimutan mo ako! Iniiwan mo ako lagi! Anong klase kang nanay?!" I started to notice all my mother's wrong doings that I kept on ignoring the whole damn time. My patience just snapped. "A-Anong klase kang nanay? Iiwan mo ako pagkatapos ay babalikan na parang tuta? Sana pinalaglag mo nalang ako kung hindi mo rin naman ako mamahalin!" Shedding tears was my biggest fear all this damn time I tried to conceal it because I'm afraid it can become my weakness.

She stopped walking but never looked at me again. "Umalis ka nalang at 'wag nang magsalita." Anito.

It broke my heart into pieces. "M-Ma..." I stammerdly uttered.

I hoped that my mother will looked at me again and embraced me for the first time but only the water droplets was leashed. "Huwag ka nang magpakita sa amin kahit kailan. Lumayo ka at humanap ng malakas na makakapitan. Umalis kana Gremory." Iyon ang mga huling salita niya bago ako iniwan sa gitna ng palakas na ulan.

That was when I gave up reaching for my mother who pushed me away..

And it hurts like hell.

"Kuya will you protect me from the monster? Like a knight in shining armor?" Genevieve dreamily looked up. "Kuya's always say that I'm a princess! And kuya Gremory is my knight in shining armor because kuya is strong and tall! And kuya Genevorld is my prince because kuya is funny!"

I kissed Genevieve forehead as I continued to tie her hair for her. "Yes, kuya is the knight in shining armor that's why I will always protect you with those monsters.."

She raised her pinky finger. "Promise?"

I smiled wholeheartedly. "Promise..."

The warmth on my heart slowly vanished it got more and more colder. Colder than the ice on the refrigerator. I blankly stared at the small altar filled with flowers and a small coffin. As I walked through the entrance, I began to see who's funeral is this.. A picture of a smiling angel, at the coffin there was her favorite teddy bear..

Niyakap ko ang sarili ng mahigpit habang papalapit ng papalapit sa kabaong, nangangatog ang mga tuhod at hindi makahinga. Patuloy kong pinipilit na makarating doon kahit na tagos na tagos ang bawat tingin ng iba pang mga bisita sa akin. Napatakip ako ng bibig nang makita ko siya.

My tears fell as I continued to sob. Still wearing my very same clothes and the dirty shoes I wore as I ran on my way here. "G...G-Genevieve.. K-Kuya i...is here... G..G-Genevieve k-kuya c-came back..." I repeatedly whispered as I hugged the cold coffin. My angel, our princess who's peacefully sleeping and reality hits me knowing at she will never be awake..

Paano? Anong nangyari? Bakit?

Punong-puno ng tanong ang utak ko habang ramdam ko ang pagsabog ng mga emosyon.. I just came back and my mother pushed me away, abandoning me.. Tapos h-hanapin ko ang mga kapatid ko para sumama sa akin.. Aayain ko dapat silang umalis eh... Isasama k..k-ko dapat si mama..
Napahilamos ako gamit ang aking palad tuluyan ng nawalan ng lakas ang mga tuhod dahilan para mapaupo sa lapag habang umiiyak...

"Bakit ka nandito?!" Galit na sigaw ng boses na kilalang-kilala ko. "Umalis ka! Umalis ka rito!" Genevorld angrily pushed me away from the coffin, I rolled and tried to stand up.

Begging, I talked. "G..G-Genevorld what happened? T..Tell me.." Halos hindi ko na makilala ang sariling boses.

Genevorld laughed while crying, he grabbed my shirt and slammed me with more strength on the wall. The visitors screamed, I notice a elderly man with his cane trying to get in between us. "Bakit ko sasabihin sa iyo? Ikaw ang may kasalanan ng lahat! Iniwan mo kami para ano? Para magsaya habang kami ng kapatid ko impyerno ang dinanas pagkaalis mo? Nasaan na ang tanginang pangakong galing sa walang kwenta mong bibig?" Genevorld punched me in the face. "Ano nga ulit iyon? Ah! Hindi ko kayo iiwan? Kuya will protect you both?" He laughed insanely. "Tangina mo Gremory! Tangina mo! Dahil sa iyo! Kasalanan mo kung bakit namatay si Genevieve!"

I can taste the blood flowing on my mouth, my eye glasses flew on the side as Genevorld was on top me crying while throwing his punches. "I...I'm sorry... S-Sorry if I left.. I'm sorry..." I cried.

"Maibabalik ba ng putanginang sorry mo ang buhay ng kapatid ko?! Sana hindi ka nalang namin nakilala! Sana hindi mo nalang kami pinaasa! Sana umalis nalang kami at hindi ka inisip! Sana ikaw nalang ang namatay at hindi ang kapatid ko!" The words came out in his mouth was ringing repeatedly on my head and stabbing my heart until the cut gone deeper. "Genevieve is still young! Genevieve should be alive now! D...D-Dapat isasayaw ko pa iyong k..kapatid ko sa d..debut niya.. D-Dapat b..babantayan ko p-pasiya sa mga m-manliligaw niya... D-Dapat makikita ko pa siyang suot ang puting gown habang hinahatid ko siya sa altar! D...Dapat buhay pa iyong kapatid ko e!"

Basang-basa na ako dahil sa mga luha namin. Basag na basag habang nakikinig sa salita ng kapatid ko.. Tinanggap ko lahat mga suntok niya at ang mga salita pero tila wala ng talab iyon sa akin dahil wala na akong maramdaman. Namanhid at wala ng ibang makapang emosyon.

The next confession of Genevorld totally wrecked my whole being, it was shattered into pieces and even I tried to pick it up nothing will happens... It will continue to bleed because it's all my fault. "S-S...She was raped! The autopsy said she wasn't poisoned but she was raped!" Genevorld cried hardly. "I..I saw her with my v-very own e..e-eyes l-laying at h-her bed with h-her messy panjamas hugging h-her teddy bear... A-Akala ko t-tulog lang siya..." Sinubukan kong kumalma pero hindi umapekto, inalalayan ng matandang lalaki si Genevorld para tuluyan na itong umalis sa pagkakapatong sa akin. "G-Ginising ko siya k..kasi birthday n-niya e... A-Ang sabi ko h-hihintayin kita sa may gate pagkauwi mo para sabay natin siyang supresahin... P-Pero tangina ako iyong sinupresa!"

"Iho tama na," ani ng matandang lalaki.

Genevorld protested. "N-No lolo! He needs to know because this is his fault!" Hinarap niya ako, hinahabol ang hininga, namamaga ang mga mata. "I wasn't there to protect her because we both know I need attend those lessons.. Remember your promised that you will protect and never leave her when I'm gone? Did you remember how you said those words? Iniwan mo kami... I was abused! I saw horrible things! You're lucky despite of being not his child he kept you safe! While us... Kami na anak niya... kami..." Hindi na nito natuloy ang sasabihin ng pilitin siyang umalis muna ng mga kamag-anak. Naiwan ako roon habang puno ng panghuhusga ang mga mata ng mga manonood.

I'm so sorry...

Malakas ang ulan ng ilibing si Genevieve. I was pre-occupied by all the shits that happened, ni hindi ko na inalala ang pagtulog sa gather at malamig na daan. Basta ang alam ko gustong-gusto kong makita si Genevieve at Genevorld. Hindi alintana ang ulan ay nakatayo pa rin ako roon, tinitignan ang lapida ng aking munting anghel..

"What are still doing here?" I just stood, wet because of the rain. Nowhere to go, kicked out, abandoned, guilty and no longer desired to continue. Ako na ang aalis, I couldn't afford one argument with him. "Aalis ka nalang?" He asked, it's okay Genevorld. It's okay for you to have a grudge against me, it's okay because I deserve this. Pagod na rin akong humingi ng tawad, pagod at takot magpatuloy. "Don't you want to know who did this to Genevieve? Don't you want to know what they've done to us?" Ang boses nitong puno ng galit noon ay ibang-iba ngayon. Garalgal at tunog malungkot. "K...Kuya.." He whispered, I glanced at him. Genevorld was kneeling at Genevieve's grave holding an umbrella. "I'm sorry, kuya.. Don't leave me.."

Hearing him say those words a tear fell down again, I ran towards him and hugged him tightly not caring about the damn rain. Gumanti ito ng yakap at sabay kaming lumuha sa ilalim ng ulan. Hours had passed when his grandfather came and assisted the both of us, nahihiya man ay pinilit ako ng mga ito na tumira muna sakanila.

It was an two storey old house where his mother lived in. His grandfather welcomed me warmly like I wasn't the reason why it happened to Genevieve. Nakatingala't nakapikit na dinadama ko ang mainit na tubig na galing sa shower, I took a deep breath remembering all those times we're together.

Takot ako na determinadong malaman ang pangyayari. Takot dahil baka tama ang hinala ko kung sino ang may pakana. Pilit kong kinukumbinsi ang sariling 'wag pangunahan si Genevorld. After taking a short bath I went outside, wearing Genevorld's clothes. There they was sitting on the old sofa while drinking hot chocolate.

Napatayo si Genevorld ng makita ako, umiling ako't nagkusang umupo sa tabi niya. Walang salita ang lumabas sa aming mga bibig kung hindi lang dumating ang lolo nito.

Inilapag niya sa mesa ang dalawang bowl na naglalaman ng mainit na sopas. "Huwag mong sisihin ang sarili mo," mahinahon nitong ani. "Nadala lang ng galit si Genevorld kaya niya iyon nasabi.. Kung may dapat mang sisihin dito ay si Genco Lajañas iyon."

I gulped trying to get rid of that something on my throat. Genevorld played with his fingers while looking down. "Kuya.. Papa raped Genevieve... I didn't see but I definitely saw it on Genevieve's notebook.. And your mama gave us the cctv footage," a new set of tears fell on his eyes. "Kuya, papa raped her own daughter.." Napahilamos ako ng mukha, ang galit ay unti-unting nilalamon ang buong sistema. "I...I didn't believe it at first.. But your mother insisted to not believing what the house doctor told us that Genevieve was poisoned.. Wala akong malapitan, kuya.. Galit ako na hindi ko alam. Hindi ko maproseso iyong bawat katotohanang nalaman ko.. What worst? My sister died because of my father's sexual abused. The autopsy report resulted that Genevieve was raped multiple times in a row, that she died by struggling.. Kuya, Genevieve fought... O-Our angel fought for her life.."

A frantic pounding, a racing beat. It was a changing heart fastly coated by hatred. I didn't dared to talk, Genevorld told me things he knew. I calculated everything.

I was fooled by the kindness they gave.. I was a idiot for believing it.

"Bakit ka nandito?!" Galit na sigaw ni mama, "magpapakamatay ka ba?!" Aniya at malakas na inalog ang magkabila kong balikat. "Ang sabi ko 'wag ka nang magpakita! Ang sabi ko umalis kana! Magpapakamatay ka ba?!"

I sneak out, went to the old mansion and brought Genevieve's belongings. I also stole the laptop I always used when Genco gave me a work, fuck that damn guy. Unfortunately, my mother caught me and guided me out of the mansion.

"He raped Genevieve! He killed my sister!" I screamed.

"Kaya nga patago akong tumutulong hindi ba?! Kaya nga pinaalis kita! Kaya ko nailabas si Genevorld kasi baka kayo ang isunod niya! Kung balak mo palang bumalik dito para sa walang kwenta mong pagpapakabayani ako nalang ang papatay sa iyo!"

Air hissed up my throat. "Bakit hindi mo nalang sabihin sa akin lahat, ma? Sa tingin mo ba mapoprotektahan mo ako kung gagawin mo akong tanga?! Pwes, hindi! Marami ng nangyari! Marami na akong nalalaman! I was naive and doesn't have the idea that I was exploited on the illegal work! And now you want me to run away? Para ano? Mangalimot? No! I will avenge my sister!"

Mama took a deep breath before taking a card on her purse. "Meet me there." I nodded.

Night came, I went to the direction that the card stated. It was our old house, I can vividly remembered how I spent my childhood on this house. Passed nine o'clock I was still waiting, ghost couldn't scare the shit out of me nor a guy with a gun. It doesn't scare me anymore because my biggest fear already happened. I was revived when I heard faint footsteps.

Holding my pose for an eighth of a second longer, adjusting to the atmosphere before me. "Let's start." I said firmly. It may sounds disrespectful but I have no choice therefore I need to know our origin, the connection, what real happened to Genevieve that day."

We remained standing uncaring with the dust all over the place lucky there's still electricity with this we are able to see each other clearly. "I was twenty five when I got pregnant with you.. I was a maid working under the Lajañas, the salary was high and it was the exchange of your silence. Whatever you see or whatever you know, you need to shut your mouth for you to survive."

"Then how did you met Giorgio, my biological father?"

Malungkot itong ngumiti. "Coming back from other country, Giorgio was a womanizer, he was a asshole, he likes to collect woman as if they're toys.. I hated it, Gremory." Ang mga emosyong sumasayaw sakanyang mga mata'y nananalamin kung gaano kasakit ang mga ala-alang ito para sakanya. "I distance myself from him but unexpectedly he and I fell in love with each other.. Believe it or not your father was truly in love with me although our feelings for each other didn't last because he impregnate another woman while I'm pregnant with you, I think the woman name's is Daniella.."

"Then?"

"All I knew was she gave birth to a baby girl.. Not long time after tour father was killed, he was caught and was shot on his office.. I was devastated even though your father was an asshole I couldn't deny the fact that I love him with all of my life, we planned for us three.. That after settling all his past mistake we will live together as a normal family.. He was ready to be kicked out by that damn family ties but before he could.. He was shot."

Hearing their story, about my father I couldn't distinguish between good or bad. I don't know, "then why did you lure yourself into his younger brother if you love my father despite of his mistakes?" I asked.

Mama shut her eyes off before talking. "Gremory when you're four years old you started to do things beyond a normal four year old boy do. Aside from inheriting your father's features, that's why exactly you look like him, like a carbon copy you also inherited his skills on analyzing and his high IQ. There was only three person who knew about you being his son. It was me, your father and his younger brother whom he trust so much but ended up betraying him.." My breath hitched. "Lajañas family is the origin of demons luring the human land. Connected with illegal deeds, establishing a pretentious orphanage that aims to protect those abandoned children were in truth they are just waiting for them to be sold and to mold them like a sex slave, hit man, slaughterers, or worst killing them. Human trafficking was their main business hidden on different industry. Genco was known a CEO and a showbiz enthusiasm however he only appeared to be kind and righteous person on outside. I'm not telling you this for you to expose, it isn't the right time, Gremory."

"You didn't answered my question why you lure yourself on him when you knew it was dangerous."

"What can a powerless woman cage on poverty do to protect her beloved son? Sooner or later he will come after you instead of running away and hidinv you I began to do schemes by letting myself being his pretending that I'm under his control to protect you.." All this time I thought she... "Hindi ka ba nagtataka kung bakit ikaw lang ang nanatili sa mansyon na iyon kung lahat ng nakakasalimuha mong bata ay nawawala? I convinced Genco to not touch you, my plan to keep you safe by playing with the devil was good not until you met his children who happened kidnapped when their mother died."

Yes, I remembered that time when I met Genevieve and Genevorld crying while being tied. So, that's what happened. "Why they're kidnapped if they're the legitimate kids of Genco?"

"If you're not useful then it doesn't matter if you share the same blood. He kidnapped them with force inable to control them in his palms especially when he saw Genevieve a spitting image of the woman he also raped.. I tried so hard to keep Genevieve away for his claws but... I failed.. I failed Laila, I failed their mother..." Both carrying the weight of broken promises. "Inhumanely, he was the worst of all worst. He's also the culprit behind his brother's death. That's why you should run away and survive," mama hugged me tightly. "Hindi man kita masamahan ngayon, Gremory magpatuloy ka.. You can live a normal life I promise you this time I'll keep him under control in able not to touch you or Genevorld and when the time comes you're able to fight back, come and get me, anak.."

"Why do you have to sacrifice yourself? Bakit hindi ka nalang sumama sa akin?"

"Kung ikakapahamak mo ang pag-alis nating dalawa mas gugustuhin kong magpa-iwan para masigurado ang kaligtasan mo, Gremory. My son you're my greatest treasure, you're my life and with the thought of seeing you suffer it pained me tenfold. That's why run away for now. I'll secretly give all the evidence with you before you go and when you gained power then let's avenge Genevieve, your father, those kids and us.."

My mother already made her mind, sealed with a longing forehead kissed, mama waved her hand and didn't came back.. That was the last time we saw each other.

Keep your enemy close.

That's my initial plan, after living with Genevorld my mother told me to continue my education at her hometown, I think it was Sitio Hiyaw Pa. And to function even though I'm far away from the enemy I thought of using Rafiya.

I stopped at the old apartment where I'll live alone from now on. Attending the grade six level, I took a deep breath tommorow I'll see Rafiya again like a obsessed toy she is I'll manipulate her bits by bits to the point she'll loose her trust to her father and both of them will ruin what Genco built.

My stomach growl with the secret allowance my mother left me and Genevorld grand father's money I'll managed to live. Tumayo ako't kinuha ang pitaka, nag-iisip kung saang lupalop ang mabibilhan ng pagkain.

Pagkalabas ko sa pinto ng apartment ay walang salitang naglakad habang lumilingon-lingo sa komunidad. Tahimik at kahit saan tumingin ay may mga puno parang gubat. Napupuno ng luntiang kulay ang lugar at ang ma preskong simoy ng hangin na sinasama ang mga dahon ng bawat bulaklak na nadadanan. I stopped at the small store, hindi na namalayang ganoon na kalayo ang narating.

I fixed my eye glasses, "pabili po." At pinatunog ang barya sa may harap, "pabili po?" Patanong kong ani, wala bang nagtitinda? Pero rinig ko iyong tawanan. "Pabili po!" Sigaw ko at nagdadabog namang lumabas ang isang dalaga.

Nakakunot ang noo. "Anong bibilhin mo?!" Singhal niya. Gremory your patience. Itinuro ko ang mga natipuhan at ibinayad ang singkwenta pesos. Mabilis niya naman akong sinuklian pero biglang nawala ang timpla ng malamang kulang ito,"may bibilhin ka pa?" Anito.

"Kulang ho ng syiete 'yong sukli." Sagot ko. Napaismid ito inabot ang limang piso at dalawang kendi, tinitigan ko ito ng matagal. Bakit panukli kendi?

"May bibilhin ka pa?"

"Pabili po nung dalawang bangus," at itinuro ang tig-pipisong bangus.

"Oh." Sabay abot nito sa akin. Inabot ko rin ang bayad, iyong sinukli niyang dalawang kendi. "Ano t---" inis itong nagsisigaw habang ako'y walang lingon-lingong nagtatakbo papaalis. Ibinayad ko lang naman iyong pinanukli niyang kendi, so bakit siya galit?

I was on my way to the apartment when I saw a boy, maybe same age as me carrying a two box filled of vegetables. I walked passed away to him, he looks struggling. My consciences was acting up that's why I couldn't turned a blind eye on him instead of walking away like I've planned I went on him and carried the other box.

"Luh?" Gulat nitong sabi, "bibili ka?" Tanong niya.

Hindi ko siya pinansin, "saan 'to ilalagay?" Napakamot batok ito sa nga kilos ko at naiilang na itinuro ang isang pwesto kung saan naroon ang isang aleng kawangis niyang nag-aayos ng paninda. "Nanay ko 'yan. Ganda no?" Proud nitong sabi.

Her mother looks kind---I stopped at the middle of that subconscious thought. I step back, no Gremory. Kindness is evil.. Kindness is pretension. Ipinilig ko ang ulo at nagsimula ng lumakad habang buhat ang karton, sa gilid ng aking paningin ay kita ko ang paglapit ng isang grupo sa gawi ng batang lalaki.

"Ross, tara basketball!" Aya nila.

Napakamot batok ito at ngumiti. "Pass muna tulungan ko si mamang magtinda." Anito, bigo namang umalis ang mga ito.

His mother smiled at me warmly before patting my head which is I found oddly. I blinked multiple times as I touched my head where she placed her hands, "huh?" I unconsciously said.

"Salamat iho ah, " inabot niya ang isang daan. Umiling ako't tinanggihan, "kumain ka na ba?" Sabay silip sa mga binili kong nakasuksok sa bulsa ng shorts. "Ako nga pala si Weina Victoria tapos iyon naman si Rossweisse, anak ko. Salamat iho ah? Hindi na kasi ako pwedeng magbuhat dahil dalawang buwang buntis na ako," pagpapaliwanag niya.

I miss my mother... Even though we haven't really been with each other I still yearn for her presences, even she won't smile on me like other mothers I still want to be with her... However, those young dreams was shattered when Genco Lajañas appeared on our lives..

Napatalon ako ng biglang iniyakap ng batang lalaki ang braso sa aking leeg at may malaking ngiti. "Bago ka lang ba rito sa Sitio Hiyaw Pa? Rossweisse Seth pala!"

I doubted for a second. I need connection, I need people to used. "Gremory.. Gremory Santillan."

I thought it would hard for me to adapt on this place but thankfully I did. "Thank you po," tita Weina patted my head and smiled. Kabwanan niya ngayon at ang sabi ng doctor ay kambal ang magiging anak niya.

The day I helped Rossweisse was indeed coincidence but as the time passed our path began to crossed. We've been friends for a long time now. Rossweisse found that I'm livinv alone on that apartment and gradually crashing over to play. And that includes him always inviting me on their house and tita Weina's warmed welcomed made me melt. I was too afraid to trust again, afraid with this kindness that if filled with pretension. I couldn't bear the pain that cost when the time comes that I'll know if this is true or fake.

I must be prepared.

Inaayos namin ni Rossweisse ang ititinda bukas halos buong maghapon ay nandito ako at tuwing gabi lang umuuwi lagi ngang sinasabi ni Tita Weina na rito nalang ako tumira ang kaso may mga bagay pa rin akong dapat gawin. I didn't went to this place to forget what is my true purpose. "Tawang-tawa pa rin ako," kwento niya habang napapasipol. "Akala ko nga ooffend si Xerxes noong nakita natin siyang naka baby bra. Wala naman iyong kaso sa akin normal lang naman na magsuot siya ng ganoon kasi iyon naman ang gusto niya." Pagpapatuloy nito.

Why? Why is he so understanding? In this case you should laugh because it's an embarrassing discovery but why the hell did you defend him?

He's wearing baby bra on the comfort room? I glanced back and fort, yeah it was noticable with his attitude and actions but to actually wear? I kept my mouth shut, I have no rights to judge someone.

Nakarinig pa kami ng iilang boses ng mga estudyante na papunta sa cr. Nataranta sina Rossweisse at Xerxes habang ako nama'y piniling manatili sa may pintuan para pigilan kung sino man ang papasok.

"Huh?" The girls eyed me with confusion when I placed my foot on the other side of the door, leaning on the opposite side I maintained the serious expression. "Ayaw ata tayong papasukin." Bulong nito sa mga kasama.

Iniharang ko pang mabuti ang katawan para hindi nila makita ang dalawa ngunit nawala ang komposisyon ng biglaan silang sabay-sabay na pumasok doon ako napasapo ng noo. Napansin iyon ni Rossweisse kaya walang magawang hinubad nito ang damit habang si Xerxes ay naiiyak na.

Pabirong hinampas ni Rossweisse si Xerxes sa may balikat at tumawa na mala Kris Aquino. "Girl! Try ko naman! Ah ho ho ho," natigilan ang mga babae sa nakita. "Favorite ko iyong barbie ba design, ikaw bet mo dora ano?" Tanong nito kay Xerxes na nakatulala.

I faked a coughed joining the embarrassing situation. "Mine is cinderella." I blurted, the girls eye went wide.

"Kaya pala ayaw magpapasok kasi mga bading.."

"Hala akala ko ba si Xerxes lang sa kabilang section ang bading?"

"Bakla rin iyong transferee at si Rossweisse?"

"Alis na tayo!"

Napabuntong hininga nalang ako nang nagtatatakbo silang umalis pagkuwanay napatingin sa dalawa na nanlulumo.

Fuck with the baby bra, and with that the baby bra squad was born.

I wore my backpack and my cap. "Aalis kana?" Tanong ni Rossweisse I nodded before waving my goodbye on tita.

All the files was still at the laptop I stole the problem is I don't know whom I will sent it, I tried many times but fail. I even sent a clue and evidence on a government official but nothing happened, Genco's illegal deeds was still good. Hindi ko alam kung sino ang pwedeng makatulong sa akin.

I greeted my teeth. Kakatapos ko lang magpunta kina Rafiya habang tumatagal palala na siya ng palala.

"Gremory dapat sa akin kalang mabait.. Dapat sa akin lang kasi ako naiintindihan kita.. Because I should be the one, I'm special to you right?" She said and threw the vase on her room.

I stood there watching her another episode of tantrums. "Rossweisse is a boy." She's jealous because of my sudden closeness at him.

She went on my front. Niyugyog ang balikat ko. "Kahit na! Kahit na! Dapat sa akin ka lang mabait! Dapat sa akin lang!" She scratched the side of my arms. "Kung hindi sasabihin kay kay daddy---" I cut her off.

Still glaring, "don't you dare, Rafiya. If something happens to them don't expect to see me ever." I threatened her, she took the bait.

"P-Pero inaagaw ka niya sa akin! Kagaya ng mga kapatid mo and that Genevieve!"

"He's a boy. I don't like boys."

"No!"

"Damn, Rafiya can't you stop? You really think I'll like someone aside from you?" Pang-aalo ko sa siraulong 'to. And again she began to melt and hugged me. They're full of wealth yet they don't let Rafiya check her mental health.

She leaned on my chest, "Gremory tandaan mo ako lang ang meron ka.. Kapag umalis ka o kapag nakahanap ka ng iba sasabihin ko 'yon kay daddy.. O pwede ring sasabihin ko sa lahat kung anong nangyari sa Genevieve na iyon..." I stared at her blankly, "hindi mo naman gugustuhin iyon 'di ba?" She asked.

I clenched my fist. "Yes."

Trapped to this hellish life on such a young age, the will to continue was fading.. All I have is the thought of revenge and after that what will happen to me? I tapped into my laptop and went into the interpol my mind was at turmoil not until a notification pop up on my screen.

Secret Service

I graduated without any fails on elementary and now I entered Sitio Highscool.

"Ang yaman niyo pala Xerxes!" Namamanghang sabi ni Rossweisse habang naglalakad kami papasok sa bahay nila Xerxes. It's our first time. I-too was amazed I thought all the house here are the same but the Guevara's was on the different level. Hindi mahirap pakisamahan si Xerxes noong una'y hindi ko alam kung papaano siya kakausapin ng hindi naooffend pero dumaan ang mga araw na naging komportable kami sa isa't isa.

Rossweisse and him easily clicked because of their playful attitude sometimes I felt out of place. Kahit na kami ang unang nagkakilala ni Rossweisse ay parang may agwat pa rin and maybe it's because of me. I can't help but to distance myself, there was Rafiya, my father and other stuffs I need to think too.

I can't risk. I planned every schemes and I can't bear any single mistakes that will ruin it.

Tumayo si Xerxes. "Wait ah, maghahanda lang ako ng miryenda. Wala si na momshie at papshie nasa manila sina kuya lang ang nandito." Anito, tumango-tango nalang ako, si Rossweisse ay ginagawa ang gusto dahil naglabas lang naman ng isang pack ng tang juice at pinapak habang nagtitingin sa garden nila Xerxes.

I remained sitting at the chair while tapping at the laptop secretly those two won't understand these things so I'm freely to do what I want especially Xerxes house has a wifi connection. Luckily. Breathing the fresh air in this sitio, I felt a shiver on my spine when a presences appeared at my back.

A finger pointed on my screen, I froze. "What is your motive on approaching my little brother?" A cold and serious voice whispered on my ear. "Xerxes is a care free child and like a wild wind he'll do whatever he wanted. I'm asking you manliligaw ka ba ng kapatid ko?" Roon ako nabuhayan. Nanlalaki ang mga matang napalingon sa lalaking nasalikod ko.

He look like Xerxes but more on a serious features he has a mole on the left side upper brow of his face. "W-We're just friends. I'm not an love interest." I straightforwardly answered.

He eyed me, both of us wearing a eye glasses. "Hmmm," then on my shock a guy just look like him, a splitting image appeared hugging his waist. Too much skinship. "Why are you hugging me, Xenver?" The other guy without glasses looks playful and with a mole in his right placed just beside his eye.

The Xenver guy smirked. "Bawal ba maglambing bebe ko?" Siniko siya nito. "A-Aray naman Xenvri parang hindi magkambal oh! Buti pa si Xerxes ko marunong makisabay sa trip---" napalingon ito sa akin nag-iba ang timpla. "Teka, kilala kita ah."

I frowned when he eyed me from head to toe before laughing loudly. "I saw him on one of your works before," the Xenvri said.

Xenver shooked his head still laughing. "Siya ata iyong nagbigay ng libreng inpromasyon na halos ikamatay namin mahanap lang." My eyes widened realizing what they're talking. "Gremory Santillan--Lajañas why did you approach our bunso? Do you have any ulterior motives?"

He knew me, they knew me. Did Xerxes knew about me? Fuck, I'm in danger they might tell Genco that I'm conspiracing something against him!

Xenver raised his hands. "I'm not an enemy actually I'm just a concern citizen. For a thirteen year old you have the skills on hacking." He said. "Want to cooperate with us?"

"What?"

He leaned, I can feel his breathing on my left ear. "Hyacinth of Secret Service. I'm the one who sent you the name of our agency. Although I'm just eighteen years old I'm experience enough to guide you on our path."

The light I've been waiting for.. Are they worth it to trust?

Naalimpungatan ako sa malalakas na katok. Inis akong tumayo at doon nakita ang dalawang babaeng marungis ang dating. "Tao po!"

Nakakunot ang noo ko silang tinanong. "Bakit?" Bwiset akong nagsalita ulit, naiinis dahil naudlot ang tulog. "Anong kailangan niyo?"

Napataas kilay ako ng magsikuan sila, iyong babaeng may kulay tsokolateng mga mata ang nagsalita habang ang isa ay nanatiling nakatulala. "Eh, may kalakal ka ba diyan tol? Teka, ikaw yung bagong lipat dito hindi ba?" Anito. "Oo! Nakita kita sa may terminal sa bayan, " kalakal lang pala ang kailangan. Walang sagot ko silang tinalikuran at kinuha ang mga naipong kalakal.

I took the box full of bottles and cans because eversince I lived alone I was lazy to cook something that didn't came into can or bottles. I gave them the box but astonished when the chocolate eyed girl gave me coins in exchange. "Just take it, I don't need that.." I said. Mukhang mas kailangan pa nila iyon kaysa sa akin.

Nagkatinginan ang dalawa."Ano raw?" Bulong ng mga ito na akala mo nama'y hindi ko naririnig.

"Ewan, tawagin mo si Ernesto magaling mag english iyon.." Sagot nung mala anghel na babae. Despite of being haggard her angelic appearance didn't suffice.

Nagpeke ako ng ubo. "May kailangan pa ba kayo? Iyan na lahat ng kalakal na meron ako, kung wala na. Isasara ko na ito."

The angelic girl finally spoke. "S-Salamat.." Even her voice is gentle.

I nodded in response, "welcome." Hindi na sana ako magsasalita pa at tatalikod nalang pero baka maoffend siya. What the hell? Kailan ko pa inisip ang mararamdaman ng iba?

Crazy.

A wrong move. I still have a chance.. I still have more options left. I didn't know that Dorothy Smile Felipe was being bullied and I just defended her but what's worst? Those bullies was friends with Rafiya, they knew me. And if I continued talking to Dorothy she'll might be in danger.

Malala na nga ang nararanasan niya sa eskwelahan dadagdagan ko pa ba? So I choose to distance myself from her, it was indeed unfair. After I became friendly with her I turned my nack and became rudely like I do with everybody else. Pero ang nakakapagtaka tuwing nagiging masama ako sa iba hindi ako nakokonsensya ngunit kapag sakanya na halos parang paulit-ulit akong sinasakal. I don't know, this is dangerous.

Nakapameywang na nakatayo sa harapan namin si Xerxes."Hindi tayo nanlilimos," aniya. "Remember nagsosolicit tayo,"

Rossweisse raised his hand. "Parehas lang iyon. Parehas lang nananghihingi," sagot niya dahilan para umikot ang mga mata ni Xerxes.

"Maging thankful ka Rossweisse at chopopo ka! Baklang 'to! Ana bet manghingi! Solicit para expensive." Halos mahilo ako sa mga beki lingo niya habang si Rossweisse nama'y nakatulala. "Someday, one day itong pinakamagandang bakla sa balat ng lupa ay magiging silikonada! Tarush!"

"Ano?"

"Bobonicles much lang?"

We decided to solicit for the upcoming battle of the sitio's and of course because Xerxes is born with connection he wasn't shy to ask for help and here we are helping him. There's a lot of things on my plate now, recently Genevorld contacted me that my mother fell ill. Rafiya's craziness is out of control, the girl Ivory who played with Rossweisse feelings just to be close with me and Dorothy... That girl who's been bugging my sleep.

I don't know everytime I think about that girl, a thought always bugging me. And that is I don't deserve any inch of her, I refused to acknowledge whatever is this feelings it will just hinder my schemes. Dorothy was terrifying, she's too kind, too naive, and too forgiving and I hate it. Kahit ata paulit-ulit ko siyang pagsalitaan ng masama ay ayos lang.

No, you can't. I shouldn't be ambitious, know your place.

Gritting my teeth I smiled at Deiry. This is her twelve slap on my cheeks. Yes, I'm counting them all.. "You're a jerk." She said as he handed me the reviewer. The commotion happened which annoyed me. Rossweisse, Ivory, Xerxes, Deiry and Dorothy were fighting and I was there, stopping myself to show any sign of care afraid that Rafiya might know.

It was okay for me, it was okay to be the villain and to be the bad one just for them. I knew from the beginning what Ivory what's that's why I also played with her, I'm not a asshole for betraying the first friend I've made.

I smirked at her. "So you're saying you like me?" The girl which I believed had a mutual understanding with Rossweisse nodded. "You like me but then you're with Rossweisse?" I asked again.

She flustered. "M-MU naman iyon! Hindi pa naman kami!" That damn reasoning gave me a headache.

I patted her shoulder before whispering something. I know they might misunderstood me for having feelings for this girl or whatever. But I didn't, they're all similar. Plastering kindness but inconsistently pretending. "Ivory or fucking whatever you're, stop clinging with me if you have Rossweisse. I hate this kind of mindset of yours. Be thankful we're going to compete for quiz bee or else..." Sadya kong pinutol ang kasunod na sasabihin, nakita ko kung paano ito mamula at mapahiya sa sarili.

As long as they're safe it doesn't really matter to me if I'll be the villain. Mas maganda na ngang sila na ang kusang lumayo sa akin, mas matatanggap ko pa.

I felt a damn shit when I acted harsh in front of her, I wanted to be selfish. I want her, she was the first person who didn't turned her back on me despite of my rudeness and bad attitude she remained, claiming that she accepted every inch of my being. However, I'm afraid. Afraid of her innocence and kindness.

My mind was floating, I had the good intentions but didn't have the chance to choose the right path. I was looking at the two of them, this is good enough. Mas maganda ng nakadistansya sila sa akin dahil unti-unti ng nagkaka ideya si Rafiya.

I was busy looking at them from a far when a soft voice called my name, "Gremory."My eyes went on her."Uh.."

Hindi ko pinahalata ang sayang nararamdaman. "Bakit?"

She stretched her hand, there was a cute music note pendant. "Ano... Alam kong nalulungkot ka," something was stranger than things I wasn't prepared for. "K-Kaya ano... U-Uh.. Ipapasa ko muna itong lucky charm ko sayo para gumaan ang loob mo."I was still shock the next thing I knew she personally handed me the pendant with her bright innocent smile. "Magkaka-ayos pa kayo, huwag mong hahayaang masira ang pagkakaibigan niyo dahil lang sa isang babae."I'm terrified about her kindness and yet I wanted it to remain. "Magpakumbaba at aminin mo lang ang pagkakamali mo, alam kong papatawarin ka rin nila Rossweisse.. Ikaw pa! Huwag kang malungkot nababawasan kasi ang pagka-pogi mo.."Ayaw kong maghangad pa ng labis dahil alam kong may kapalit ang lahat. "Fighting Gremory! Kaya mo iyan, huwag kang malungkot. Maraming willing na makasama ka!" Kumaway ito papaalis.

Naiwan akong tulala at hawak-hawak ang pendant. Bigla nalang akong kinapos ng hininga at nanghihinang napasandal sa railings, shit that girl... What the fuck is this feeling?

I was in that position until Cosmos saw me, "may lagnat ka?" Taka niyang tanong dala ang dalawang bottled mineral water. "Namumula ka!"

"I don't need your lucky charm." I said the transition of her expression was quick, I wanted to say nice things, I wanted to apologize but I can't. I had to restrain myself because if not I might wake up in another nightmare again. "But thanks."I murmured hoping for her to hear.

Preoccupied on my concience I glance at her one again on our p.e class, she was cheekily standing there, the next thing I knew my nose is bleeding. All of the students present were shocked, the once who threw the ball are now thinking what excuse they should give to let this slide.

I felt dizzy, good thing my eyes were close when the ball hit my face. "Gremory ayos ka lang?!" Rossweisse hurriedly went on my front. This guy really doesn't know how to endure me, huh? I felt a ticklish thing on my chest when he wipe my bloody nose on his shirt not minding that it might leave a stain. His hands were trembling, I just stared at him when he held my hand and guided me to stand up.

I couldn't watch the next scene all I can hear is Xerxes voice. "Wiz ako naniniwala. Inosenteng diwata si Deiry.." I can feel his anger despite of having that flirty tone "Esusme, ang fanget, fanget mo. Naniniwala ako kay Deiry," on my peripheral vision I saw her being held by that guy.. That guy who's always testing my patience, what his name again? Ah, Feitan. Like a monkey clinging on her can't he see that Dorothy is chasing me? Is he numb for not knowing it?! "Kayo kanino kayo maniniwala? Kay Stacy chanak o kay Deiry na diwata? Kapag sa chanak babangungutin kayo.."

Walang imikan kaming nakapunta sa clinic kung pwede lang akong kargahin ni Rossweisse na parang bagong kasal ay ginawa na nito, he was distressed. The nurse immediately attended me while Rossweisse was there sitting at the plastic chair near the clinic bed.

"Buti nalang at hindi nabalian ng buto ang ilong mo," ani ng nurse. "Ang lakas ng impact ano bang ginagawa niyo?" Tanong niya.

I couldn't see her face clearly my eye glasses which my mother gifted me is now broken. "We're playing dodge ball.." I answered, she shot her eyebrow up.

Frowning, "naglalaro kayo ng dodge ball kaya ka nagkaganito?" Tumango ako bilang sagot. "Are you playing with a gorilla?" Rossweisse choke his own saliva and started laughing, the nurse took a deep breath before telling me to rest and excused herself.

There was no friction between us, the serious tension wasn't suffocating like what's with us this past few weeks of giving each other a cold treatment. "Alam mo bang gusto ka niya? Alam mo bang aalis siya?" He asked as the conversation started. "Bakit hindi mo sinabi sa akin?" The smile he always had vanished and was exchange by that wrecked expression.

I hate weak people, I hate kindness but why the heck these kid of people can pull me into their bright perspective? Pulling me out of my countless schemes leaving me with no choice to forget everything I've planned. "She told me she likes me." I straightforwardly said.

"Tangina," mura nito at napatayo. "Sana sinabi mo sa akin!"Aniya.

Sitting there calmly, "we tried to tell you even Xerxes notice that something off. But how could we ruin your happy expression whenever you talk and brag her about us? We tried but what else did you do? We argue, right? You only believe on what she says, you only do what she wants." Rossweisse froze maybe realizing the series of conversation we had.

I supposed not to care, I was supposed to be distance against everyone. I should have the barrier because they might got entangled in my schemes and ending up getting ruined. "Tangina!" Galit nitong sabi habang nakapamulsang sinipa ang upuan, he should lashed his anger out I believe I deserve it. "Pakiramdam ko Gremory hindi kita kilala. Ilang taon na tayong magkaibigan pero ni isang detalye ng buhay mo hindi ko alam! Magkaibigan ba tayo?"

I wanted to say yes, I badly wanted to answer without any rumorse but this doubt is valid and maybe this can driven a line between us. Unlike my band mates Xerxes and Rossweisse means a lot to me, they're more than friends, they're my family.

Prohibiting any emotions that can be shown, I looked at him."I don't know."

Rossweisse mouth gaped open, he looked hurt, he looked betrayed. "Puta." Bulong nito at tumalikod papaalis.

Hindi ko kayo pinagdududahan pero takot akong magkaroon kayo ng ideya kung gaano kapangit ang buhay na tinakasan ko. I'm afraid, I'm ashamed and most importantly I'm not worthy of their trust sooner or later I'll leave this place and never come back because that's the plan.

Inabot ko ang nasirang salamin at tinitigan ito basag ang mga lense at may koonti ng lamat ang frame. Naalala ko ang nanay kong nasa mansyong iyon, kumusta na kaya siya? Is everything doing well on her favor?

The presence I feared the most appeared, slowly I opened my eyes and welcomed by that, "okay lang?" That voice is like a hummed of a siren."Gremory?"

I took a deep breathe I felt my heart beating faster, "w-water.."Inabutan ako ni Xerxes."I'm fine.." I need to do something I can't afford to be sympathize like this.

"Huwag ka munang tumayo!"Saway niya ng subukan kong tumayo. I instinctively slapped her hand, I was stunned. "Hindi ka pa okay..." Again, that feeling of emptiness was there, her voice was low. Inis kong itinapon ang salamin sa basurahan at tinalikuran silang lahat.

She's adorably annoying. She's a damsel in distress that's why she's easy to be taken advantage of. Anong akala niya sa mundo? Parang fairy tale na puro naggagandahang bulaklak, bahaghari at mga hayop na sa ngalan ng pag-ibig lahat ng problema ay mareresolba? I hate her guts, I hate her attitude and how was she mold but because of her I still had this tiny hope that kindness isn't grossome.

Dorothy should open her eyes on the reality. If you're being bullied, fight back it wasn't easy however you should fight for yourself. Give kindness to those who deserve it, stay away from dangerous people like me before I lose the urged to continue on pushing you away or else you'll end up like my angel... My Genevieve.

Maaga akong pumasok sa eskwelahan wala sa sariling napadaan sa classroom nila Dorothy. She was transferred into another class because of my complaints regarding her bullying incident. I told ma'am Garcia not to tell anyone that I was the one who gave her the complaint things might go against my palm.

I saw that guy again. Kabisado ko kung saan ang row at upuan ni Dorothy kaya patago ko siyang pinanood, my eye sight may be bad but not on this matter. I saw him putting a sticky notes. My brows knitted, my guts was right.

That Feitan is doing advances on Dorothy. He likes her to this extent. Poor him the one that Dorothy likes is me. Even he compete at the end of the day I'm still the winner without doing anything.

On the freaking middle of the night who the heck is knocking at my door? Aborido kong binuksan ang pintuan bumungad si Xerxes at sa likuran nito'y so Rossweisse kapwa may dalang tote bag na naglalaman ata ng tupperware.

Walang salitang nagdire-diretso ng pasok si Xerxes sa apartment ko animo'y kanya ito habang si Rossweisse nama'y nakatitig sa akin bago pumasok at iniabot ang tote bag. And in that moment I knew we're okay, everything is settled. Ganito naman kasi kami mag-aaway at pagkatapos ay walang salitang magkakaayos.

Xerxes is already sitting at my small table, inihahapag ang mga ulam sa may tupperware. "Hindi ka pa kumain no?" Tanong niya, tumango ako. "Kami rin." Anito buti nalang talaga at nakapagsaing ako kahit walang balak na kumain.

Rossweisse washed his hands on the sink and prepared a three plates while I was taking the rice off the rice cooker. "Perya tayo pagkatapos kumain.." Anyaya ni Rossweisse habang maganang sumandok sa adobong manok na dala ni Xerxes. "Nakikita mo ba ako?" Pagkuwanay tanong niya sa akin at itinapat ang nakataas na dalawang daliri.

Inis ko iyong sinamaan ng tingin. "Malabo mata ko pero hindi ako bulag." Ngumisi ito bilang sagot, magkatabi kaming dalawa habang si Xerxes ay nakaupo sa harapan namin.

Xerxes minding his own business. "Tikman mo 'tong luto ni tita Weina na saladang kangkong.." Sabay lagay nito sa pinggan ko, "damihan mo iyon iyong kain baka matuluyang ulcer ka.."

I smiled secretly. I was waiting for someone, I was drowning on the deepesr edge of the darkness and they there are above me holding my hand 'til the light embrace me once... Sa parang ito nakakalimutan ko iyong mga bagay nangyari sa nakaraan. Nakakalimutan kong hindi ko pasan ang mundo, dahil sakanilang dalawa nararamdaman kong normal lang ako...

After resting for almost two hours we decided to go to the perya. Xerxes is covering the expenses that we may use today, telling us money isn't problem on them.

"Sa vicking tayo," turo ni Xerxes parang bangakang idinuduyan ka.

Mayabang na ngumisi si Rossweisse. "Baka himatayin ka!" Xerxes grimaced.

"Excuse me, baka mauna ka."

And fought like dog and cat nagpatuloy kami sa paglalakad Rossweisse is holding Xerxes latest phone and taking pictures of us. Tutok na tutok ito roon kaya hindi na ako nagtaka ng may makabanggaan ito

A familiar voice said. "Shit. Dei!"Deiry is now sitting at the ground. "Gago, pwede ba mag-ingat ingat naman?" Anito.

I stared at Rossweisse he was panicking upon seeing the annoyed face of Feitan. "Sorry pre.. Sorry.." He was attempting to get in front of Deiry but he stopped. "A-Ano.. A-Ano ayos ka lang?"Stammering he asked.

Walang pakielam na pinagpagan lang no Deiry ang suot na track suit."Oo." Tipid niyang sagot pansin ko ang pagbukas sara ng bibig ni Rossweisse. May gusto itong sabihin pero siguro nahihiya dahil sa nangyari noon..

Siniko ako ni Xerxes at binigyan ng signal, alam ko ang umiikot sa isipan nito. He's trying to play the cupid. "Sasakay din kayo sa Vikings?"
Dorothy nodded. This rides aren't suitable for her, she's delicate and easy to break."Ayon pala! Sabay-sabay na tayong lahat!"

Ang pagtutol ay naudlot ng nauna na si Xerxes sa may bayaran ng ticket. Gusto ko sanang sabihin na humanap ng lang ibang rides iyong hindi delikado dahil kahit gaano ko isipin ay baka liparin ang babae.

At hindi pa roon natatapos ang pagkairita ko nang makasakay ay nagkaroon ng sitting arrangement. Xerxes, Deiry and Rossweisse were seated beside each other while me, Dorothy and Feitan were together. It made my eye ache everytime the two of them are laughing with each other.

The ride moved. "Ayaw ko pa mamatay!" Anito. "Oo na hahayaan ko ng sabihan akong fokfok ni Aling Dena!" Because of Xerxes the others are laughing by hearing his words. "Beki ako ng taon at part time fokfok na rin!"

I saw how Deiry shooked her head. She has the feeling of something familiar. "Shut up. People might misunderstood you, the pokpok word seems negative they might get you because of that." She scolded while Rossweisse was clinging to her.

Nice one Ross.

"Kukuha ako ng Bachelor of PokPokstary!"

"Xerxes shut up!"

"Requirement lang naman ang maging open ang pekpek 24/7 sa mga forenjer 'di ba?"

Crossing my arms I glanced at Dorothy beside me, she was tense. Halata ang pagpipilit nitong 'wag sumigaw at napapapikit sa tuwing tumataas ang duyan.

Her hair was dancing with the wind, her face looks innocent even though she was covered with nervousnesa. "Lord. Please, lord." I heard her say.

I was about to console her when that Feitan precedent before me, he fucking held her hand. "Para hindi ka matakot." Hindi ko na alintana ang pagbilis ng galaw ng sinasakyan o ang mga sigaw dahil nakatuon ang pansin ko sa dalawa. "Sigaw ka para mabawasan yung kaba!" Aniya.

They're fucking holding each other's hand. Gusto ko ng bumaba!

I clenched my fist. "I love you Dorothy!"

Dorothy eyed him. "Anong sinabi mo?!" The guy just shooked his head and laughed. Edi kayo na ang masaya! "Ah!!!" Sigaw nila habang nagkakatitigan.

Tanginang 'yan.

"Shit! Who peed?!"

"S-Si Rossweisse ata?!"

"Oh God! What the fuck! Xerxes!"

"Hindi nga ako! A-an--Ah!!!!!"

"Damn! I'm surrounded by monkeys clinging on me!"

Akala ko'y hindi niya ako babalingan ng pansin pero palihim kong itinago ang saya ng mapansing nakatitig ito sa akin. "Bakit?" Aniya. "G-Gremory.."

As I was getting hype I saw Feitan smirking at me like he knew something. He's fucking giving me that arrogant smile and it made my blood boiled.

"I already told you. I don't like stupid, pest girls. I don't want my record to be stained by you," I uttered. "Not by someone who's like you. Never."

Damn this fucking jealousy. I'm losing my mind.

"K-Kuya... " I skipped a beat. "How dare you to be happy... It's your fault my I died... How dare you smile..."

Ipinikit ko ang mga mata habang marahang minamasahe ang sentido. Napapadalas ang pagkakaroon ko mg bangungot at ang malala ay mas nagiging klaro ang mga iyon na kahit gising ako'y bigla nalamang nagpapakita. Rafiya gave me that smile still not letting go of my hand and suffocatingly clinging on my chest.

"I told them I won't go to school if we're not classmate.." Nanindig ang mga balahibo ko ng ilandas nito ang daliri sa aking leeg. "Gremory is that Dorothy girl chasing you?" I gave her a flat look. "Gremory I told you selosa ako gusto ko sa akin ka lang mabait, gusto ko akin lang ang atensyon mo.. Kapag sinuway mo ang mga gusto ko baka magkaroon ng pangalawang Genevieve at saka mawawalan ka ng pag-asang makatakas sa papa mo..." Trying my hard not to vomit, "I love you, my Gremory."

Ano pa bang gusto ng babaeng 'to? Bulag ba siya para hindi makita kung gaano ko pagtulakan ang lahat? Can't she see everytime Dorothy is calling me I ended up telling how much I hate her were in fact it wasn't true? That I'm too afraid that Dorothy might go with the same path with my younger sister?

Halos sa tuwing bumubuka ang mga bibig ko ay gusto kong masuka, sa tuwing tinitignan ko siya ng masama at sa tuwing ang maganda niyang mukha ay napapalitan ng lungkot at sakit gusto ko nalang saktan ang sarili ko... Kasi hindi ko kaya.. I don't have the courage yet to name this feelings I have but I knew sooner or later I can't control it any further.

The prom came by like a rollercoaster. I saw the most beautiful girl despite of having the same gown she was shinning alone making her outstand. I wanted to ask her for a dance without the eye of Rafiya. A argument broke before I could ask her, I wanted to interfere pero mas lala lang kung gagawin ko iyon.

Buong gabi'y pinagmamasdan ko siya ng patago hanggang sa umalis si Rafiya dahil sa tawag ng daddy nito. I stood up, Rossweisse was busy sulking dahil naunahan na ng hiya habang si Xerxes ay nakita kong nagwawala na sa dance floor habang hawak ang kamay ni Galatea.

I went in the front if the most gorgeous girl in my eyes. "T-This is frustrating you know," her eyes widened like he can't believe what's happening. "Can I take you for a dance?" I asked and I was the happiest when I heard her yes that I didn't had the momento to stop myself from chuckling like a fool.

Those was the most enjoyable and memorable minutes of my life not when I saw Rafiya..

It was late night still highlighting every key points on the reviewer I made for Dorothy. I lost it when she and Feitan was talking like they're on relationship. She gotten cold and I deserve it but the fact that Feitan has getting all her attention annoyed the hell out of me kaya nga kahit dapat ay pigilan ang sarili'y nagkusa na akong turuan siya para lang masira ang plano nilang group study.

I wrote every explanation to help her passed the remedials. Minsan ay gusto ko nalang talaga siyang pakopyahin pero sa tuwing nakikita ko kung gaano siya kadeterminadong mag-aral at intindihin bawat lesson ay napapaatras ako. That's why everytime her brows are frowning while looking at the board I found it cute, when she's lost in dazed and panicking finding the right page on our text book.

Kabado ako noong inaya akong kumain ng tita niya sa bahay nila. Ni hindi ako makahinga ng maayos dahil sa sobrang nerbiyos ni hindi na nga ata ako nakatulog ng maayos dahil sa sobrang pagkataranta. Idinadaan ko nalang sa pagsusungit ang lahat ng gusto kong gawin at sabihin.

We settled ourselves on the cafè near by she was seriously solving the mathematical problem I gave her, abala ito kaya kinuha ko ang pagkakataong umorder ng cheesecake.

I saw how she pursed her lips. "Wala akong pamabayad.." Katwiran nito.

Tinaasan niya ko siya ng kilay, "hindi kita sinisingil." Balik kong sabi, enjoying teasing her.

I froze when she looked away. "Right. Ayaw mo nga pala sa babaeng nagfi-first move," it was so bitter that it tugged my heart.

I sat down, it doesn't matter who makes the first move as long as we both wanted it although you can't if it's me... We both can't even we wanted it. "Why would a girl make a move if I can do it first?" I smugly said. "I should do the first move.."

She crossed her arms. "ego? Kung kaya ng lalaki, kaya rin ng babae. Hindi porket kami ang unang gumalaw ay desperada na. Palibhasa porket babae ang nanligaw agad niyong babatuhin ng mga salitang desperada, ang pabangit tignan, walang delikadesa at iba pang mga negatives comment." Saad niya. "Oo na kayo na ang cool, kayo na ang hinahabol. Shuta,"

I sighed. "Okay, I'm sorry for judging and throwing some harsh opinions I should keep it on myself."

"Aba dapat lang."

"Like what I've said I didn't mean to offend you."

Because it also pained me everytime I'm acting like a jerk.

"Ay hindi lagi mo akong inooffend madalas sadya mo."

"Dorothy.."

"Bakit?"

"Just focus on your reviewers. We shouldn't argue in front of food and things needed to be done."

Nabalot kami ulit ng nakakabinging katahimikan, hindi ko na nakayanan kaya tinawag ko uli ang pangalan niya. "Dorothy," aniko.

"Ano na naman?"

I sighed again, "why did you wear that?" Turo ko sa short niya dahil tagos na tagos ang titig ng mga lalaki sa side niya.

Inis nitong ibinaba ang ballpen at nakakunot noong sinagot ako, "above the knee. Hindi naman masyadong maikli--"

I cut her off. "-Pero kapag umuupo ka kita ang legs mo. " Baka kapag hindi ako nakapagtimpi ay mag "Tayo."

"Huh?" Lutang kong ani.

He looked so pissed. "I said stand up." Sumunod na ako. "There." Medyo hindi ako nakasagot sa mga inaasal niya ngayong araw!

Naningkit ang mga mata nito at may mapaglarong ngisi, "siguro nagseselos ka o kaya naiinis kasi nakikita nila legs ko ano?"

Hindi ako umimik pero naghuhumerantado ang dibdib. Hindi naman ako makukulong kung hindi mahuhuli. "No, as if." I shouldn't gave her hope, I should restrain myself for the sake of us. "I'm just a plant tito kaya kita pinalipat..." Stammering and shy to admit that I was displeased seeing other boys feasting on her I came up with the most nonsense excuse. "I just want to appriciate the beauty of this plant that's why. Y-Yes I'm a plant tito."

Damn, I suddenly became a plant tito, e hindi nga ako humahawak ng halaman.

I blinked multiple times when she handed me the most precious thing I ever had. On the science garden, with my medals but still the emptiness on my heart remained as I envied my friends. I was thankful to tita Weina and Nerveila that they accompanied me on the stage while receiving my awards but it still huts different. Like every blink of my eye my heart continuously sank on the bottom.

Stunned by her gift, I stiffle a smile suppressing the moist on the side od my eye to from into tears. "I-Is this.."

Dorothy was like an angel filled with harmonic kindness that even the most evil man can't resist, "naalala mo ba noong kamuntikan na akong duguin noong paulanan ako ng bola?" My breath hitched whenever I remembered that day. "H-Hindi ko sinasabing sinalo mo iyong bola dahil sa akin ah? A-Ano lang.. " I stared at her gift. "Pinagmamasadan kasi kita noon parang mahalaga sa iyo yung salamin mo na halos ayaw mo ng palitan magmula ng makilala kita ang kaso nasira noong sinalo mo iyong bola.. K-K.. Kaya noong tinapon mo agad kong pinulot at saka pinaayos yung frame.. Hindi mo na naman magagamit pero pwede mong itago.. Mukha kasi talagang mahalaga sa iyo.."

The frown I always have vanished and the vulnerable expression shown, "of course it is precious.. This is the first thing that my mom bought for me.. The first thing that I treasured the most.." I mumbled. I remembered my mother, I remembered the times I was naive and only experiencing the best times of my life.

"A-Ano.. C-Congratulations ulit.. M-Mauuna na a-ako.."

She turned her back on me. I want to pull her for a hug, I want to whisper my gratitude. I wanted to tell her that I'm sorry.. "Dorothy." Lumingon siya tulad noon, tumigil ang paghinga ko.
"I can't promise I'll be good to you. There's a huge chance that I'll treat you bad like the past years. So, please don't like me. Spare yourself. " I said and patted her head.

Her eyes were detailed with confusion. "Pero bakit?"

Because you'll ended up being ruines. "Just don't engage yourself to me. "

Pero talagang sinusubukan ako. Siya na ata ang karma ko sa lahat, kahit anong lakas ng pagtulak ko sakanya ay siya rin naman lakas ng paghahanap ko sa presensya nito. Labag man sa loob ay hinalikan ko si Rafiya dahil unti-unti na naman itong nagdududa. Actually, I'm disgusted at myself for the sake of Dorothy I'm willing to trade everything she began to occupy my mind, she began to highten my spirit, she's my cheerleader and also my resting place filled with warmth.

Tinulak ko siya papalayo sa akin pero para namang magnet akong babalik papunta sakanya, masakit man pareho sa amin ay kailangan kong panindigan ang napag-usapan. We're secret lovers now, she didn't have the idea how many times I shouted on bliss and rolled on my bed when we kissed. I was tempted, for me she's my first on everything.

It was messy. Started on a wrong way and continued as it is yet I was contented, it was enough for me when we kissed, enough for me when we dated in secret and especially when we sleep with each other's embrace. Her name is my favorite word.

She's indeed my smile.

Akala ko magtatagal ang sayang nararamdaman ko pero talaga nga atang sinusubok ako ng tadhana. I managed to brush Rafiya off on the picture but eventually Genevorld came.

My mind went blank when I saw that fucking man harassing my girlfriend. I was blinded by anger and all I can see is fucking red. How dare him touch her. How dare this filthy man touch what's mine! "FUCK YOU!" Dorothy was trying to stop me but I didn't budge, I kept on punching him 'til he lost his strength. "DAMN YOU! KAPAG SINABI NG BABAENG HINDI! MARUNONG KANG MAKINIG!" Hindi ko napigilan ang sarili dahil biglang naalala kung anong sinapit ni Genevieve, naalala ang mga natuklasan na pilit kong itinapon.

I stomped on his crotch. Hoping fo him to have an erectile. "G-Gremory tama na.." Dorothy was trembling but it wasn't enough to stop me. Dahil siguro maliban sakanya'y may iba pa akong dahilan. "Gremory.."

I handed my jacket on her, this isn't the right place for her to stay. "Go. Puntahan mo sina Cosmos sa sasakyan." Utos ko.

Halata ang pagprotesta sakanya. "P-Pero----"

Agad konv pinutol ang kung ano pa mang idudugtong niya. Hindi pa ako tapos sa putanginang 'to. "-Wala ng pero, pero! Sumunod ka nalang! Huwag kang aalis doon hanggat hindi ako nakakabalik! Or yet umuwi ka na pahatid ka kila Zachariah!"

Nang nagtatatakbo itong umalis ay pinagpatuloy ko ang ginawa. Binugbog hanggang umiyak na ito, mali siya ng binastos. Tangina.

"Hindi ka pa tapos?" Rinig kong sabi ni Alex habang nakangising nakatitig sa lalaki. "Anong atraso sa iyo?"

Wendell squated to check the man. "Buhay pa siya..."

Panting, "he touch and harassed my girlfriend."

Troy stopped and froze. "Girlfriend? Namali ba ako ng dinig? Isa lang ang kasama nating babae rito ngayon 'di ba?" Tumango si Wendell, "hindi naman siguro isa sa amin ang tinutukoy mong girlfriend?" Hindi pa rin ito makapaniwala siguro ay tinitimbang kung kasinungalingan ang sinasabi ko.

Wendell gave me his handkerchief. "Tanga," aniya. "Si Dorothy nga."

"Seryoso? Akala ko ba hindi mo siya gusto. E, gago ka pala gusto mo naman pa hard to get pa. Gold ka ba?"

"Baka akala ni Gremory astig siya."

Alex took a deep breath. "Enough, sooner or later may darating na rito. Let's go ahead. I'll just file a report against this man."

I'll be willingly potray the role of villain just for her.

Scathed dreams. Kung kailan nakapagdesisyon na akong itatama ko lahat ng pagkakamali kay Dorothy at aaminin ang nararamdaman ay doon pa nagkanda letche-letche. Pinangalanan ko na ang patagong nararamdaman kong ito dahil kailan ma'y hindi ko talaga napigilan, itinago ko lang.

I stared at the ceiling, Genevorld was furious. Akala niya'y kinalimutan ko na ang nangyari noon at napagpasiyahang iwanan siya... Gusto ko pero may magagawa ba ako?

"Kuya nangako ka sa amin nina Grien.. Nangako ka kuya.. Iiwan mo nalang kami ulit sa ere? Kaya nga kahit ang hirap maiwan doon hinyaan ka namin kasi ang sabi mo babalikan mo kami na.. Nangako kang kukuhanin mo ulit kami at poprotektahan.."

I closed my eyes tightly as my heart broke. "don't make me choose.. Please." Tangina ayaw kong mamili kasi parehas naman kayong mahalaga sa akin. Ayaw ko ng iwan si Dorothy kasi sakanya ko naranasan kung paano maging masaya, gagawa naman ako ng paraan e. Huwag mo lang akong papiliin.

"Paano kami?! Ayaw mong pumili pero sa nakikita ko kuya ay pwedeng-pwede mo kaming kalimutan ni Genevieve! Kasi ano? Masaya ka na rito? Kasi malayo ka na roon? E, paano naman kaming mga kapatid mong nakakulong pa rin doon? Ganiyan ka ba talaga? Mahilig mang-iwan? Basta nalang kakalimutan ang mga sinabi mo noon?" A lone tear escape my eyes. "Why would you make promises if you're going to break it, Kuya? Nangako ka sa puntod ni Vive.."

"I'm sorry.." I uttered.

I knelt down to hugged him. I knew he suffered compared to me, it was my fault afterall that's why I deserve evey inch of blame and hatred.. "K-Kuya 'wag mo naman akong hayaan.. P-Please I don't want to g-go back.. K-Kuya h-help me please.. K-Kuya y-your promise.. K-Kuya.."

"I'm sorry.. G-Gagawa ako ng paraan. Just don't make me choose, I finally found that someone I can't do the plan.. I couldn't.. I'm willing to sacrifice myself to save you and her, kahit ako nalang.. Huwag mo lang akong papiliin.." I hugged my brother tightly.

"P-Pero alam niya na.. Parating na siya.. K-Kuya natatakot ako.."

Tangina, wala akong magawa para ilayo silang lahat. Ayaw kong mamili pero bakit patuloy akong ginigipit sa sitwasyong iniiwan akong walang pagpipilian? Putangina ayaw kong pakawalan si Dorothy pero ayaw ko rin naman siyang madamay sa gulong dala ko..

Bobo ako pagdating sa babaeng mahal ko...

Dorothy's love for me was slowly breaking. I can feel it. Kung kailan nagkaroon na ako ng takot sa ideyang mawawala siya sa akin ngayon pa ito nangyari. Ipit na ipit na ako, hindi ko na alam kung ano pa ba ang gagawin. Gusto ko nalang takasan ang lahat at sumama nalang sa tabi niya.

I saw her eating alone, I gathered all of my strength. "H-How are you?" She didn't respond. "May I sit?" I was relieved when she nodded. Sobrang tahimik ni wala akong ideya kung bakit bigla siyang nanlamig. "Kumusta ka?" Tanong ko uli, "h-hindi mo ba ako sasagutin?" Bigla ka nalang kasing hindi nagparamdam. Alam mo bang lagi akong naghihintay sa iyo? Alam mo bang sa tuwing ipipikit ko ang mga mata ko at ikaw ang bungad sa bawat panaginip ay nakakahinga ako ng maluwag? Kahit na wala ka sa tabi ko iniisip lang kita ayos na agad. "H-Hindi ka na bumalik simula noong bumisita ka sa hospital," she avoided my gaze. "A-Ano, hindi k-k..ka na rin bumisita sa apartment ko, a..at a-ano.. H-Hindi mo a-ako kinakausap magmula noon o kinukulit.. M-May nagawa ba akong mali?" I tried to reach for hand but she avoided it.

My heart sank. "You're a mere toy for him. Don't act so tough just because he's treating you nicely. Keep holding on him and it will be the death of you. How long will you take me for a fool?" My forehead creased. "Ano ba talaga tayo Gremory?" My mouth gaped open. "Laro lang ba talaga ako para sa iyo? I get it now,"

"W-We're..." Hindi ko mahanap ang tamang salita.. Dapat bang sabihin kong mahal kita? Dapat bang isagot kong hindi ko na mapigilan itong kinikimkim ko at takot na akong mawala ka? "I-I.. I li---"

She cut me off. "I'm sorry for everything," my world fell apart. "Sorry for bothering you for way too long, constantly trying to fit myself on your world. The contract.. I'm sorry that I no longer desire to be with you.." I couldn't process every words he's saying. "G-Gremory, pasensya na sa lahat pero ayaw ko na. Kung laruan lang ako para sa iyo, sige hahayaan ko nalang iyon tutal kagustuhan ko. Pero pasensya na, ayaw ko nang patagalin ang paglolokohan nating dalawa. Niloloko ko lang ang sarili ko, at ngayon sa hinaba-haba ng panahon sa wakas.. Nakarating na ako sa puntong ito.. I don't know if this thing between us is considered as a relationship or what, a plaything? I don't know. "

You're sorry for everything? Why? Are you finally coming to your sense and now doing the advice I'd gave you a long time ago? Kung kailan namulat na ako sa katotohanang ayaw kong mawala ka? "Y-You are breaking up with me?" Nanginginig ang boses kong tanong. "Bakit ngayon pa?" Tangina, bakit ngayon pa na takot na kitang bitawan? "Fuck," Icursed.

"I am truly sorry for all the troubles I've done. Don't worry by the end of this night I won't bother you again, like I didn't exist on your lif---"

"-Paano kung ayaw ko?! Paano kung hindi ako papayag?!"

"A-Alam kong nagbibiro ka lang. I'm just a plaything right? Nothing but a mere toy you took off the hook and now interested with, after long series of trying to shoo me away. You see me as a pest, a nuisance and it's my fault for sticking and invading your world like I am the most powerful person on the world. Pasensya na talaga, "

You weren't my toy! You're not a toy to begin with! I was the toy because you wrapped me around your fingers and started to act like a fool whenever you're around! "N-No..."

"Mas magandang huwag nalang tayong magkita, mag-usap at umaktong hindi nangyari ang mga iyon sa buhay natin.."

"I don't want!" Para akong bata.

"Iyon ang gusto ko. Ako na ang kusang pumuputol sa kung anong putanginang tali ang ikinabit ki sa iyo para hindi ako mawala sa buhay mo! Ako na ang kusang pumupunit ng listahang ginawa ko para mapasaakin ka!"

"I refuse to accept this words from my girlfriend. You're my girlfriend and no matter what shits you're going to say such as breaking up with me, I chose to refuse. You little she devil after wrapping me with your scheming list then you're going to run away from me like a coward? Take responsibility of my feelings, Dorothy. And this time I'm sure."

But she made her mind. "Still no," I said with conviction. "Play time is over. We already broke up."

I cried and tossed in my sleep. Rossweisse was trying to ask me but I scold him away. It fucking hearts, it is my karma but this time I don't want to accept it. Para akong zombie kinabukasan, ang gusto ko lang ay makita siya. Kahit ngitian nalang niya ako, ayos na sa akin.

"Gremory si Rafiya!" Nabulabog ang tahimik kong pag-iisip ng dumating ang nagsisisigaw na kaibigan ni Rafiya roon din ay parang mga langaw na nagkumpulan ang mga estudyante at nakiki usyosong nagpunta sa lugar na itinuro nito. "Gremory ang sabi ko si Rafiya!" Sigaw nito ulit.

Aborido ko siyang tinignan. "Hayaan mo siya." Sagot ko. Napanganga ito.

Isa-isa na ang mga sumisigaw at natataranta. "Hoy si Rafiya nalulunod!" Doon na ako napatayo at nagpatianod sakanila. Nadatnan ko si Rafiya at isang estudyante sa may railings. Pahulog na ito kaya buong pwersa ko silang pinaghiwalay pero huli na ng makita kung sino iyon.

She fell.. The water was painted with red... "Dorothy!"

"Kumalma ka Gremory!"

"Tangina padaanin mo ako! Gusto kong makita si Dorothy!"

"Putangina ka rin may magagawa ba iyang pagwawala mo?! Eh, kung palitan mo nalang iyong doctor!"

Nahimasmasan ako sa sampal ni Deiry. Sa ganitong pagkakataon ako magpapasalamat sa mga sampal niya dahil ibinalik ako nito sa tamang wisyo. Ayaw kong umalis, ayaw kong umuwi dahil wala naman iyong
tahanan ko. Galit ako sa sarili ko kasi bakit ibang babae ang hinawakan ko imbes na siya?

Iniwanan ako ni Rossweisse sa may gilid pansin ko ang ibang mga estudyante na hindi makapagsalita, namumukhaan ko iyong iba, sila iyong mga masayang naninira kay Dorothy. "Gremory. I also had a bruise.. I was also hurt," tangina kahit nga mahulog ka pa wala akong pake.
Hindi ko siya pinansin. "Are you ignoring me?! Gusto mo bang malaman 'to ni daddy?!"

"Rafiya, I'm tired. Please stop."

"You'll regret this Gremory! You think this is tiresome?! Well to tell you she's the tiresome one! You lose your scholarship because of her! You thought I wouldn't knew? Nakipagbasag ulo ka lang naman para sakanya at ano ang kapalit? You lose your scholarship that you work hard for!"

I don't care about that damn scholarship because it was worth it. Dorothy is more worthy of anything.

I ran and ran like insane. "I-I..I don't k-know about this.. D-Dorothy---" she slapped my hand. "P..Please l-listen t-to me.." I can't bear the fact that this is set up to humiliate her.

Damn it! Fucking Rafiya!

She step backwards."N-No..I'm suffering because of you! P-Plano mo 'to ano? H-Hindi ba gustong-gusto mo akong nakikitang masaktan, mapahiya at maging kawawa? S..Sabi na e! P-Plano niyo 'to nina Rafiya! Ah! K-Kasalanan mo 'tong lahat!"

Sa bawat paglandas ng luha niya ay katumbas ng sampong parusa sa akin.
"I-I d.. didn't.. T-The last thing I'll do is to hurt you.. Paano kita sasaktan kung makita ka lang umiiyak e triple na ang sakit sa akin?" Gago ako pero hindi ako hahantong sa ganito.

Durog na durog siya pero iba ang atake nun sa akin "Nadurog mo na ako ng pinong-pino, Santillan. Kahihiyan nalang ang meron sa akin, hindi ka pa ba talaga susuko? Gusto mo ba dumating ako sa puntong magpakamatay?! K-Kasi iyon nalang ang sagot? Lahat kayo.. Ang sasama niyo. Kapag mahal kayo ng tao ipagtatabuyan niyo, lahat ng ginawa ko para sa iyo itinapon mo na para bang basura 'di ba? Tumigil ako sa paghabol tapos ikaw naman ang kusang lumapit sa akin. Ako namang itong tanga inisip na secons chance iyon! Sumama ako sa iyo kasi akala ko Gremory pang seryosohan na e, noong sinabi mong secret girlfriend ako. May narinig ka bang reklamo? Wala! Kung alam ko lang na ito ang magiging kakalabasan ng lahat sana hindi nalang kita nakilala.."

"I'm sorry.." I'm sorry for ruining your life. I'm sorry for coming to your life.. I'm so sorry.

I pushed Rafiya as hard as I can when I felt her touching my crotch. "The fuck you're doing?!" Rafiya smiled seductively, I was just resting on our clubroom when I woke up feeling disgusted.

"Gremory I can give you more than she could give you..."

My brows shot upward. "What the heck you're saying?"

She sat on my lap and held my neck, slowly gripping it, choking me. "Touch me, kiss me and I'll moaned. You're just playing with her right? Hindi ba ang sabi mo ako lang? Nilalaro mo lang siya hindi ba? Do you want me to participate too?"

Galit akong tumayo dahilan para matumba ito. "Fuck!" I cussed when she tried to reach for my zipper. "Yeah, we made it okay?! We kissed. She moaned. I touched her. But it wasn't a game like you're saying! I wasn't disgusted like what I'm feeling right now to you! I'm not playing with her because between the two of us, I'm the most lucky one for kissing her... And Rafiya it was back then, please stop your obsession before it gets worst."

Her eyes glistened on anger. "Magpapakamatay ako!"

"Stop."

Ni hindi ko man nasabi sakanya ang totoo... Wala akong karapatang habulin siya... Tangina, ang sakit.

Hindi ko maiintindihan kung bakit unti-unti silang nawawala.. Hindi ko alam kung papaanong pagmamakaawa pa ang gagawin ko.. Kahit gaano kahirap para sa akin tatanggapin ko 'wag lang silang mawala.

"P-Please...Tell me where she is... P-Please.." I plead as my tears mixed with the rain drops. "F-Feitan I need to talk to her.. Where i...is my girlfriend? Where is she?"

Kneeling down, putting my pride aside just to know where she is... This is nothing compared all the things she went through just for me. "Umalis na siya... Tumayo ka na, Gremory kahit gaano katagal ka pang umiyak at lumuhod hindi na natin siya maibabalik.."

"N-No.. T-Tell me where she is... I'll chase her this time... I need to talk to my girlfriend.."

Feitan, shooked his head. "Umalis ka na."

Dorothy left Sitio Ibuka/Buka without any words, I was waiting for her on our meeting place. I was strip on the rights of being valedictorian, I was planning for this graduation to give her the things she deserve. Pinlano ko na e, kung kailan kong bitawan iyong paghihiganti ko para sakanya walang pagdadalawang isip ko iyong gagawin pero wala...

Sa hinaba-haba ng paghahabulan naming dalawa tuluyan na siyang nawala.

I didn't went to the stage but was obligated to attend the graduation. There was a after party. It was chaotic, Rafiya cried all of the sudden making a scene. Half of the class sided her.

"You did nothing wrong, Rafiya."

"Hindi mo naman kasalanang naexpose iyon. Deserve naman ni Dorothy.."

"Yes, that's what I'm saying. Inagaw niya iyong boyfriend mo tapos hindi ba may record siyang habol ng habol kay Gremory? Deserve niya naman iyon!"

"Wala kang kasalanan.."

They went on that conversation I hanged my head low beside me was Rossweisse, Xerxes, Feitan, Cosmos, Alex, Troy, Wendell and Deiry who's gripping her diploma. We tried to ignore it but it gotten severe.

Deiry stood up, "Problem with the thoughtfulness of people. They think apologizing justifies everything they've done and forgiveness follows apology," her voice was shaking in anger. "Without any guilt of their wrong doings they believe mercy should follow the process. Ah, ang kakapal!" Aniya.

One of Rafiya's friend stood and fought with Deiry's words. "Kami ba pinariringgan mo? Eh, kung may dapat mangsisihin dito si Gremory iyon ah! Kaya nga hindi na nagpakita si Dorothy hindi ba?"

Rossweisse held Deiry's hand to calm her done but it wasn't effective while Xerxes was beside me. "Oh? Talaga? Tangina ka!" And she raised her middle finger.

A loud noise coming from the mic interupted the heated situation.. It was Cosmos and the band who's getting ready to perform. "Masaya na kayo? Mga pakyu mukha naman kayong mga garapatang hilaw akala niyo ba ang gaganda't gwapo niyo? Aba tumingin kayo sa salamin." They couldn't stop him or more on no ine in the band wants to stop him. "Oh, saan dito iyong mga putanginang nambully kay Dorothy? Aha! Ayon!" He pointed some students. "Iyan ano nga ulit pangalan mo teh? Ah, Stacy! Tapos iyon shout out kay Rafiya teh satisfied na ba? Or kulang pa? Hirap sa inyo ang galing niyong maghugas kamay para lang masabihan na walang ginawa. Noong nasa junior high level si Dorothy lahat kayo g na g magparticipate na bullyhin iyong estudyante porket hindi makapagsumbong lahat nalang sakanya pinagtatawanan niyo tapos ngayong umalis kanya-kanya kayong turo kay Gremory? Aba? Nasaan konsensya niyo? Nasa esophagus?" Natulala ang lahat dahil sakanya
"Turo kayo ng turo kay Gremory. Sisi rito sisi roon akala niyo ang lilinis ng mga budhi eh. Remember ah wala ni isa sa inyo ang malinis kahit isang drum pa ng zonrox ang laklakin niyo hinding-hindi kayo lilinis. Do participated on tormenting her yet you have the audacity to play innocent? Pointing fingers on someone throwing him the most fault where in all of you was the same? Really? Fucking hypocrites. And yeah, tutal graduate na ako wala na rin namang kwenta iyong expelled or guidance, tangina niyo."

The whole gym was filled with silence after he blurted all those words. No one raised there heads.. I silently teared up, ah, Dorothy even you're not here you still entice everybody with your kindness..

I gave the file on Xenver's subordinate, he has the same cheeky smile. "Ayos lang ba 'to?" He played with the usb on his finger. "Sabagay uso ang traydoran ngayon.."

I stared at him a little longer before sighing. "It's his faith to be betrayed. That's the pay back." I answered, kapalit ng mga iyon ay ang pagtulong nila sa akin. Xenver told me their organization in exchange of the files I'm with I even became their hacker and infiltrate every portal I could.

"Angas ah," komento nito. "Paano ba 'yan magmumukha na naman akong astig ngayon," aniya at tumalon sa napakataas na pader. Ilang sandali lang ay nahulog ang lubid indikasyong nakapasok na siya. Hindi ako sanay sa ganitong bagay, I don't even climb a tree and now I'm climbing this fucking huge wall? I prefer working under the screen than this!

We entered that fucking mansion once again. I wanted to see my mother, it's been years.. Wala kaming dapat ipangamba maliban sa mga cctv at mga guards na nakabantay dahil wala si Genco ngayon. According to Felix Genco is in another meeting again-surely it's not a normal meeting with a company working under showbiz. Vince disabled all the cctv as we ran around the mansion, I was hopeful that may mother is alive..

"Damn," I uttered, malansang amoy ang nadatnan ko sa silid ni mama. Her room on the fabulous mansion was this, magulo, kalat ang basag-basag na mga salamin at may mantsa ng dugo. Kahit pinipilit ang sikmura'y tumungo ako't naghanap... Hinahanap kung narito ba ang mama ko.. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." Multiple curses escape my lips when I saw a skeleton on the side it was covered with worms and flies.

"Tangina... Ano 'to?" Nabibiglang ani Felix, maagap na nilapitan ang bangkay.. "G-Gremory..." Nakatulala lamang ako, hindi makahinga at gulong-gulo sa nasaksihan. A possibility that's it's my mother but I brush off that idea... Damn, hindi dapat ganito. She told me to survive, she ensured that if I gain power she'll wait for me... Pero bakit ganito? Isa-isa na silang nawawala sa akin.. Muli'y naramdaman ko ang nakakabinging sakit na una kong naranasan kay Genevieve at mas tumindi ng kay Dorothy... Gusto ko na lamang sumuko. "G-Gremory.." Tawag ni Felix sa akin at inabot ang napakaruming singsing na hinigot nito sa bangkay, "hindi ba..." He couldn't continue his words to affirm the situation. I wanted to scream out loud as I grasped on what he meant.

Yes, it is.. That's my mother's most precious ring gave by my late father. My mother didn't left that ring anywhere else if it's not her fingers. Confirmed, it is my mother. Oddly, I felt hurt but I didn't cry I was just blankly staring at the remains and it made me insane...

Felix moved the remains and carefully wrapped them with the cloth, he knew that I couldn't move a muscle.. Sino pa nga ba ang ililigtas ko? Kinuha ko iyon sakanya at mahigpit na niyakap iginaya na ako nito papalabas. Maingat kaming naglakad bawat pagtapak ko sa sahig ay ang pagbaha ng napakaraming ala-ala... On our way out the alert tone filled the whole place, red lights began to spread. We're at awe... Nahuli kami?

Pero nawala ang agam-agam ng masilayang hindi kami ang hinahabol dahil naroon ang isang batang lalaki na mabilis na tumatakbo papalayo sa mga naglalakihang guards. And it hit me, he was kidnapped to be sold. Nagkatinginan kami ni Felix pagkuwanay napatango dahil iisa ang tumatakbo sa aming isipan.

Felix hand me the command, I nodded as I performed the escape plan if something happens. Felix smoothly went on the childs direction and carneyed him forcefully as they ran to escape the bodyguards. Meanwhile, I placed my mother's remain on the car and ignited the engine waiting for them.

"Shutaaaaa!!!!" Sa malakas na bulahaw ng garapal na bunga-nga ni Felix ay pinaandar ko na ang kotse at walang pagdadalawang isip na idinrift iyon, mabilis na kumilos si Felix at nakapasok sa kotse. We ran over the bodyguards and like ants afraid of being step on they scattered.

The boy on the backseat was trembling, "nilalamig ka ba?" Felix asked and gave him his jacket. "Saan ka ba nakatira?" The boy bit his lower lip and shooked his head multiple times. Sa tiyansa ko'y nasa labing apat na taong gulang na ito. "Oh?"

"H..Huwag.." Mahina nitong pakiusap, " 'wag niyo akong ibalik... Binenta ako ni tiyo sa kanila... Pambayad ako ng utang..."

When he said those words that way-putting the two situations together in one sentence-right then it enlighten us. The elusive scheme that's been calculated on my head from the very beginning was strengthen because of this child. Again, it made my conviction.

"A-Anong pangalan mo?"

"Almore po... Pero tinatawag ako ni mama na L-Love,"

Everythings ready.

"Almore," tawag ko rito. "Go to the fan meeting.." Nangunot ang noo niya at bakas ang pagprotesta. "Do it." Four years ago I made a name for myself and took Almore under my wing. Still affiliated with the Secret Service because my scheme isn't yet granted.

Almore took the box of gifts and even wore the shirt I purchased. "Ang korni boss. Hindi naman ako fan boy ni Miss Smile e," sinamaan ko ito ng tingin. "Dapat ikaw nalang pumunta roon! Inaalipusta mo ako lagi! Kung hindi fan meeting sa concert tapos ginawa mo pa akong 24/7 stalker ni miss Smile!"

"You're not a stalker. Binabantayan mo lang siya."

"Boss tungaw lang ang maniniwala riyan."

Sinipa ko ang trash bin sa tabi ng lamesa ko kaya't kumaripas ng takbo si Almore dala-dala ang mga hinanda kong regalo, suot ang I love you miss Smile shirt. Kung pwede lang ako na ang pupunta roon, years and still I’m  sucker for her. Minutes passed when my phone rang, I picked it up the caller was no other than Xerxes.

"Oh?" He's done studying in law school now, I think?

["Gremory may chismis ako! Alam mo naman hindi ba sikat na si Dorothy ngayon? Tangek, totoo ata iyong kumakalat na balitang sila nung Clasper!"]

Naging bingi ang magkabila kong tenga ng marinig iyon. "People can misinterpret everything they seeing, their closeness is natural--"

["-Nagkiss daw sila kagabi sabi nung paparazzi na katabi ko ngayon dito sa restaurant. Umuwi sila sa iisang suit. At nakita silang gu---"]

"-Tangina mo." Malutong kong mura dahil kulang nalang ay i-narrate niya ang buong pangyayari. Inis kong pinatay ang tawag pero bago pa man maibalik sa bulsa ko ang cellphone ay si Rossweisse naman ang tumatawag. "Oh?" Bungad kong sabi.

["Huwag kang mabibigla!"]

"What? Nabuntis mo si Deiry at ngayon kakasuhan ka niya?" Tanong ko.

["Good idea. Kaso iba 'to! Huwag ka munang iiyak. Sabi ng 'wag kang umiyak e!"]

Ang dami ko ng problema dumadagdag pa ang mga karataduhan nila. "Tangina mo sabihin mo na!"

["Ay baka umiyak ka e."]

Pang-aasar pa nito. "Papatayin ko na 'to."

["Magsyota raw iyong si Clasper at Dorothy. Tapos nainvite ako sa kasal nila--"]

"Kung wala kang matinong sasabihin papatayin ko na 'to. Reporter ba kayo ni Xerxes? Daig niyo pa si Almore na pinagbabantay ko kay Dorothy." Rinig ko ang mga halakhak nito dahil sa tono ng boses ko halata ang pagkapikon.

["Kawawa naman kayo ni Xerxes. Buti kami going strong."]

"Tss. You don't know it might jinx."

["Hindi iyan. Inggitero lang kayo. By the way the reason why I called you is that Dorothy signed a contract on our company. Thanks me later."]

At last, one of my schemes happened. Dorothy signed on Rossweisse company it's now easy to see her.

I wanted to bury myself on six feet hole. Hindi mawala sa isip ko ang nangyari sa fan meeting it's Almore's fault! I looked a idiot while blubbering those words.

"T-Thank you?" I heard her voice on personal. Damn.

"O-Oh welcome.." My mind went on turmoil. Nawala ang ilang oras kong pinagpaparaktisang mga salita. "a-ahm.. M..M-Magnanakaw ka ba?" Aniko, sinusunod ang tinuro ni Almore.

"Ah?" I stilled when I felt her closeness. My heart beat faster when I smelled her natural scent. Hindi iyon nagbago.
"Hey, are you okay?"

Natutuliro. "K-Kase m..mukhang..."

Dorothy frowned. "Mukhang?"

Nanatiling nakatitig ang mga mata ko sakanyang labi. "K..Kasi m-mukha l-lang.." Ilang segundo ng mapagtanto ko ang pagkakalat buti nalang ay nahatak ako paalis ni Almore sa harapan ni Dorothy.

I was starstruck!

Almore held my neck. "Tumataas ang BP ko boss! Hindi kita pinilit pumila para magkalat!"

"The fuck should I do?! Fuck. It's your fault! I ordered you to attend this event on my stead but you! You crazy ass! Fuck!" I shouted in return.

"Halata naman kasing gusto mong ikaw nalang! Dapat nga maging thankful ka boss! Nakausap mo iyong idol mo!"

"Fuck you!"

Ah, and now Almore is also discovered. Nang sabihin niya ang nangyari sa condo ni Dorothy bigla akong nilukob ng kaba roon na nag-umpisa ang pag-aalinlangan ko. I searched for Dorothy Smile Felipe that registered on Sitio Ibuka but there's no one. If it has, the status was deceased. How can it be if she's at there outshining every artist? Papaanong patay kung naroon siya at buhay na buhay?

It was now Smile Dehil Felipe or known as Smile Felipe.

Halo-halo na ang nararamdaman ko idagdag na naman ang sinabi kagabi ni Xerxes patungkol sa diamond ring. Hindi ko na napigilan kaya nasuntok ko siya. I told Genevorld my worries and he also found it suspicious. And this fucker invited Dorothy on his wedding kaya hindi ko alam kung papaanong pagtatago ang gagawin ko.
I asked Rossweisse a favor to give my letter on Dorothy.

What happened in those four years?
What have you gone through?
Why are you letting them used your name?
Why? What is the reason?

Why Dorothy Smile Felipe is dead and a new Smile Dehil is alive?
Why?

The answers on my question is her tears. It pained me when I saw her lying and shaking in fear, wala akong magawa kung hindi ang panoorin siya kagaya noon. After she and Genevorld talked I was there observing but when she pushed him away she began to shake and gasping for air.

Her head was on my lap, I caressed her hair slowly as she relax. Ganito naman lagi tuwing hindi niya nakikita naroon ako. It was more than enough to see her from afar what's more if I see her and touch her in this distance? I couldn't feel lighter than ever. Siya kasi iyong pahinga at kasiyahan ko kahit na ako iyong nagbibigay ng kalbaryo sakanya. Gusto kong ibalik kung hindi siguro ako gipit sa sitwasyon baka nagawa ko siyang tratuhin ng tama..

Kasi Dorothy mahal na mahal talaga kita. Tangina.

She complete wrapped me around her fingers.

Hindi mapukat ang ngiti sa labi sa tuwing naalala ang nangyari kagabi. The way she moan, the way she lose her mind beneath me. It was breathtaking, ayos na sana kung hindi niya lang mariing tinanggihan ang alok kong kasal. I'm at the bar with the boys, talking about the case of Galatea. I was staring at him-Clasper I remembered how he kissed someone else when she's with Dorothy.

Ayos lang sana kung hindi na ako iyong gusto ni Dorothy kaso kung ang gago rin namang ito mas gugustuhin ko nalang idaan sa santong paspasan para makuha ulit siya. I was horrified when I secretly visited the set for Dorothy but the moment I stepped into the dressing room I saw Clasper and his designer kissing torridly. I was furious that's why we ended up punching each other.

Although I had this anger on him somehow it was lessen remembering what happened between Dorothy and I. Naiwan kaming tatlo nila Rossweisse at Xerxes sa stool at maganang umiinom habang pinag-uusapan ang pangyayari sa buhay.

"Hi," a lady on her maxi dress approach us. I looked away when she purposely leaned to show off her boobs. "Let's have fun," anito at lumapit sa amin kasama ang iilan pang kababaihan.

Napapalibutan nila kami, "sure. Matatanggap niyo naman siguro ako," Rossweisse said causing us to glared at him. Ano na namang sumagi sa utak ng taong 'to?

The lady laugh seductively and tried to hold Rossweisse. "What is it ba gentleman?"

Rossweisse smiled. "Ang totoo niyan dati gaya niyo rin ako," nagtataka namin siyang tinitigan. "May boobs din ako dati pero sa tulong ng doctor napalitan ng malapad na muscle ngayon. Iyon ding kipay ko? Huwag niyo ipagsabi ah, ngayon ahas na..." The ladies face was epic. Awkward silang natawa at sa amin naman bumaling no Xerxes habang ngiting tagumpay si Rossweisse dahil nataboy ang mga babae.

I smirked. "Oh, you like men?" I said, they giggled. I held Xerxes hand, his eyes widened. "What a coincidence, I also like men.." Aniko at sumandal pa kay Xerxes na hindi maintindihan ang itsura.

Sorry ladies I have one woman on my mind. And even how hard you try you can't erase her on me.

Diery is my sister. Fuck it. I don't know what to feel, the scheme was on going we successfully took the firsr step to ruin Genco. My relationship with Dorothy was okay but unfortunately it was only for a contract. I was devastated when I heard about those four years, patong-patong na ang sakit.

Tangina wala akong pakielam sa sasabihin ng iba, umiyak ako. Kasi putangina iyong babaeng mahal ko nadamay din sa kagagawan ng gagaong 'yon. Dorothy is sound asleep I was hugging her stomach, my scheme resulted to this blessing.

Iyong blessing na sumisipa.

I thought about this, I planned to impregnate her for her to lose the reason on leaving me. But I realised I was just being an asshole again after hearing what she went through I was willing to let her go now.. Kahit na lumayo siya at huwag nang magpakita hindi na ako iiyak at luluhod o papanoorin siya sa malayo basta makita ko lang iyong payapa at masaya niyang ekspresyon.

We prohibited her from joining the plan it was enough for her, nagawa niya na ang parte niya sa iskemang 'to at tanging dapat niyang gawin ay ang magpahinga kasama ang angel namin. I did all the ways to stop her aching on revenge, ako na ang gagawa. I'll repay them ten fold for what they did to her.

“Gremo——ack!” Nagpupumiglas si Rafiya ng hawakan ko siya. “Ano ‘to?” Unti-unti ng bumabagsak lahat ng galamay ni Genco at isa na sila roon.
I stared at the girl who tormented me in the past. A kind girl that deceived me because of her obsessesion. “Ano ba! Gremory I love you! Gremory finally I found you! Gremory help me! Gremory!” Sigaw nito habang ipinapasok sa loob ng sasakyan. Her father was handed to the organization I bet she'll ended up on the mental hospital.

Although I've dealt with Rafiya a long time ago, I started with that Liza. It was partly suicide but I pulled strings, I mentally tortured her until she took her own life. Jameson was handed to Clasper but before that I did a part, I cut her hands off those hands who shooked with Genco's while selling my woman. And now, the overdue is done.

Xenver was leaning on the cell's wall. "Huwag niyong patayin," he reminded us.

Walang salita kaming pumasok ni Genevorld sa selda kung nasaan siya. Genevorld tag along with me to do our revenge kahit buntis ang asawa nito. Genco was asleep. Ah, umaasa ba siyang makakaalis pa siya rito ng buo kaya nagagawa niyang matulog ng mahimbing?

Malakas na sipa ang ibinungad ko sakanya, he groaned on pain.. "W-What the hell..."

Our eyes met. I smiled. Nakaluhod habang hawak ang baba nito, Genevorld was standing and also smirking. "Did you miss me, pa?"
Genco halted and glared at me. Looking back I used to hide in fear but now seeing him like a cockroach crawling. Ah, indeed what a sight. Hinawakan ko ang buhok nito, napaangat ang ulo sa akin. I spit on his face, "fucking devil. " And started to pour out my pent up anger.

Basag ang bungo, naliligo sa sariling dugo pero hindi pa ako nakuntento at paulit-ulit na inapakan ang pagkalalaki nito. Genevorld finally got tired of watching he, showed me that thing he was hiding on his pocket.

He went on his father's direction. Genco couldn't open his mouth nor scream, he was just laying there. "Pa, how did Genevieve plead you to stop..." Nandilim ang mukha ni Genevorld. "Did she said, pa, stop? Or did she cry? Did you enjoyed cumming on your own blood and flesh vagina? Ah?" Genco growled. "Ano ba ang dapat nating gawin sa kaibigan mong 'to?" Sabay itinuro sa pagkalalaki nitong inapak-apakan ko.

Genevorld nodded and unzip Genco's pants. The poor devil growling on protest I can even see his tears despite of the blood. Pity him kahit gaano pa kalakas ang sigaw niya walang tutulong. Like what he did on our sister, how he mercilessly did it to her.

"AHHHHHH!!!!!!" Natawa ako sa sigaw nito, walang pag-aalinlangang pinutol ni Genevorld ang pagkalalaki niya. Wala akong maramdamang konsensya tila naibenta na sa dami ng eskema. We're still holding every traces of our beloved angel, this is the payback and it isn't fully paid. Hindi pa buo ang bayad sa mga kaputanginahang ginawa niya..
Nagsisimula palang kami.

Xenver stared at us before handing the wet wipes. "Sabi 'wag patayin e." Sermon nito, pinunasan ko ang patak ng dugo sa pisngi at kamay. "Tangina, mas gusto ko nalang pala mamatay kaysa sa ganito.." Pagbawi niya ng makita ang estado ni Genco.

Genevorld bid his goodbyes, ironically after doing that crime we went on church... I was thanking him. I wasn't asking for forgiveness.

I smiled when my little Greg ran towards me. His mother nodded with a small smile before she went inside the car and drove away. "Dada!" I chuckled hearing his cute voice. Agad ko siyang binuhat at natatawang hinalikan sa pisngi. "Dada's day?" He innocently asked.

I nodded. "Before doing some activities for Dada's day do you want to take a nap?" I brush his messy hair, "matutulog muna si Greg ko bago maglaro kasama si Dada, okay?"

"Uhum!"

"That's my boy.."

I cooked his favorite snacks while he's watching anime. Sa gilid ng mata ko'y kitang-kita ko ang pagkamangha nito sa pinapanood, I shooked my head he is definitely my son. Walang tapon, walang bawas sa pisikal na aspekto sana lang ay hindi siya ang karma ko. Nang matapos ay lumapit na ako kaagad sakanya, awtomatikong nagningning ang mga mata nito at ibinuka ang bibig.

"Dada ahh.." Nangingiti ko siyang sinubuan habang nakatutok ang atensyon nito sa television.

Sometimes I wonder what if Dorothy and I ended up while Greg is growing? Siguro ang sarap sa pakiramdam na makita ang anak kong nanonood ng television kasama ang mama niya at ako na nagluluto habang pinagmamasdan silang dalawa. I guess everything turned out just fine.. I hope I freed Dorothy with my selfish scheme, I hope she's happy now.

"Dada.. Greg, ask twesyon?" Natigilan ako sa bigla niyang sinabi, he waited for me to respond, growing anxious when I didn't. "Dada?"

The moment I opened my mouth to speak he was instantly curious. "What's my little boy wants to ask?"

He crawled and sat down on my lap, his tiny hands held my cheeks. "Dada and mama love, love?" I looked away. "Flends school mama, dada love, love. Kiss and play.. Dada and Mama time togethel..."I gulped hard to ease my strange feelings.

Ang hirap pala kapag ganito. I grew up without an full affection from both parents, I didn't even know what it felt to have a complete family. Yet here I am, the reason why my son didn't have a complete family. I'm the one who's at fault and my son is the one paying for it.

Inilapag ko ang plato sa mini table, "I'm sorry, kiddo." I uttered. "It's daddy's fault."

"Ay?"

I stared at him before patting his head, "woman doesn't need a boy. They need a man whom will love them with all his heart. A man who's brave enough to stand against those bad people who wants to hurt his woman, a man with love that doesn't destroy. A confident love as well as gentle.. Pagmamahal na walang hati o bawas, pagmamahal na deserve nila..."He was staring at me like he knew what I'm saying.

Greg blinked, "dada love mama?"

I kissee his forehead, "of course. I love your mama more than anything else and you." He giggled. "Dorothy-your mama deserve to be free from me.. From my love who kept on ruining her, from my love that always makes her cry. I'll be the happiest man alive when she'll meet the man she deserves but then I think I'll die multiple times thinking that man wasn't me..."

"Dada... Dada cry?"

"Nope. Always remember this Greg.. Don't ever hurt a woman around you whatever the reason is," he nodded. "When time comes that you will meet the girl you love do everything with courage no matter what happens.. Huwag mong hayaang may pagsisihan ka sa huli..."

"Yes, dada!"

My Greg took a nap and I was busy watching him as I took to Deiry over the phone. "Will visit later.." I said, we're going to play with his tito.

["Kuya, Genevorld said we're gonna visit Genevieve bring Greg because I'll bring Rosshan and Rossweisse too.."]

Our relationship wasn't good at the beginning when I told Deiry about our father she was confused, I was afraid she'll resent me but after years it went smoothly. Dorothy and I are no longer together, separating taking care of Greg. Hindi ko alam kung anong nangyayari sa buhay niya paminsan-minsa'y magtatanong ako sa kapatid ko inuutuin ang anak para ikwento ang ginagawa niya.

Things went straight when we broke the scheme keeping us together, when I saw her peaceful smile when we get apart. I was genuinely happy iyon kasi iyong ngiting hindi ko maiibigay sakanya. Greg was born I stayed beside her until she recovered and Greg was easy to attend.

Magkasama kaming umalalay kay Greg naroon na rin ang tulong ng mga kaibigan at kamag-anak namin. Greg was having all the favors because my friends wives aren't yet pregnant in short Greg was the first born on their generation and now, finally he has playmates. He's three year older to Xerxes twins and four year older on his cousin-Rosshan.

"Gigisingin ko lang si Greg mamaya," ani ko. "Don't forget to rest and follow what's the doctor told you okay?" Kakatapos lang kasi nitong manganak. Sa tuwing nakikita ko ang mga kaibigan kong masayang yakap ang babaeng mahal nila'y hindi ko maiwasang mainggit.

["Okay kuya. See you, then."]

I sighed. There's no way I can turn back time. Also as per what Greg told me Dorothy and Feitan start dating and even planning for their wedding.. Ah, it aches.

Hours passed and I woked Greg up. I was holding his hand was we walked on Xerxes villa, wearing a backpack filled with Greg stuff I smiled proudly. Masaya na akong hindi ipinagkait sa akin ni Dorothy si Greg. Ipagkakasiya ko nalang ang sailing kasiyahan doon at hindi na maghahangad ng labis.

"Dada Biya is like a fairy lady no?" Tinitigan ko si Greg, hindi ko alam kung saang parte niya nakuha ang ideyang iyon. Xenov and Xenovia are toddlers, kaya saan?

Frowning I carried my son. "What? Xenovia is a baby she's not yet a lady.." I explained.

Greg smiled boyishly, "no dada, Biya is a fairy lady... " Hindi na lang ako nakipag argumento sakanya dahil buo na ang isip nito sa ideya.

We don't know what will happen on future but I'll guide Greg not to take my steps... I'll guide him on the path where he won't have to lose both. I'll teach him how to trade fairly to make his woman happy.. Especially how to stop running away and ending up being wrecked.

It was a long list of scheme to achieve what I desired. On exchange of every scheme I did I lose everyone I love.

But also because of my scheme I had Greg at least, I wasn't alone.

The result of my scheming list.

Sitio Ibuka/Buka

Wakas |ᥫ᭡tksm