Please, I do not want a heart

By violetdepravity

147K 5.3K 442

Eillie died and she finally met God. God told her she will be reincarnated and asked her who she wants to be... More

Please, I do not want a Heart: Prologue
Part 1: Please I Do Not Want a Heart
Part 2: Please I Do Not Want a Heart
Part 3: Please I Do Not Want a Heart
Part 4: Please I Do Not Want a Heart
Part 5: Please I Do Not Want a Heart
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Artwork Special
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First Arc of Please I Do Not Want a Heart Side Stories
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Second Arc Prologue
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Voting Time
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By violetdepravity

"I and Apple will go out and scare the guards away."

"You cannot kill them!" Dream reminded the owl.

Night looked back to Dream with a surprised expression.

"Child, there are many ways to shoo them away, so why should I kill them? Just behave and wait."

Dream gave Night an unsure expression. Night just shrugged it's feathered shoulder. There is nothing it can say to put the mind of the girl at ease. Even if they decided to embark into this journey together, they barely grasp each other's personality and attitude.

Night turn into a shadow and soon disappeared. Dream and the two puppies were all ready to get out of the door as soon as Night opens it.

The door soon open. It was slowly opening.

However, Dream is confused as the owl usually brags it's achievements nonchalantly and in a fast pace. The door is opening way too quiet and slowly.

Is Night trying to be extra careful?

Dream decided to inch forward and poke her head out but was surprised when a man's hand covered her mouth.

Dream is extremely surprised.

"Hmm!"

"Shhss!" The man urge Dream to keep quiet.

"It is my turn to guard, and the other ones just left so please keep quiet."

'Howard!?'  Dream silently screamed to herself. She is utterly confused. Her eyeballs started scrolling the place around them. She is looking for Night. Dream then looked down and noticed Howard's shadow moving differently than the other shadows around them.

"Get ready and- hmmm... It looks like you are." Howard noticed that her and the puppies are ready to get out but just brushed it away. "Let's wait a bit more then I will show you the way out of the village."

Dream's eyes were wide open. As soon Howard took off his hand from Dream's mouth the first word that came out of her mouth is asking for answers.

"Wh-why?" That is the only word she uttered from her confusion.

"You... I mean..." Howard looked back and forth to Dream and the puppies. It seems the man is troubled by other things.

The next words he said made Dream more surprised.

"I do not know how to converse with royals."

"Wh-what?" Dream want to ask what Howard meant but it was cut off when he grabbed her hand.

"Let's go, we do not know if someone might decide to check up on us."

Howard pulled Dream out of the house that have no windows. The puppies who did not even bark or bared their teeth on Howard, happily followed them.

"I saw a wolf wandering around outside the village. Is that the mom of the two puppies?" Howard whispered.

'No, they are siblings.' But Dream decided to keep the answer to herself.

"I just spotted it earlier before coming here. Do you want to call out to her? And can you make sure she will not attack me? Also can you quietly do it?"

Dream then whispered Apple's name. The wolf right away poked out her head from the nearby bushes.

The two puppies ran towards to Apple. Apple looked wary but did not smell any evil from Howard and soon after joined them.

Howard is amazed how bigger wolves are compared to a regular dog. He felt scared but he have important matters to take care of.

"She is so big..." Howard admired the wolf but shook his head to refocus himself.

"Here map and compass."

"How did you know I need... Did Night-..." Dream cut off her sentence when she noticed that Howards shadow were vehemently shaking.

"Night? Yes it will be dark so it is better to make sure you have to strictly follow the compass. Head North from here. Do not make any detour as you might accidentally step out of the boundaries of Spade. Remember, there are barbarians outside the boundaries. They will hunt you, especially you have wolves with you. They eat literally anything."

"If you go North from here, you will reach the boundaries of Heart country. It will be obvious as the Heart Country is full of yellow sands. From there go west and you will reach the Diamond Country."

Dream just listened and followed the man. As they reached far enough from the village, the man turned around to her.

"Also here some food. They are dried meat and great for traveling. Please go as far away as you can. If you go that route-"

"Wait!" Dream had it, she have so many questions. She is finally feeling quite off.

Howard look down at the girl who looks like so confused and disoriented. Howard eyes are filled with warmth emotions and that just confused Dream further.

Howard kneeled down and looked straight to Dream eyes.

"You are-", Howard cut himself off again and shook his head. He properly corrected himself this time. "Your royal highness, Princess Dream Walker of Spade."

Howard watch the eyes of the girl widened. He then patted the head of the girl. An action a commoner could not never do but he needed to warn this benevolent being.

"Your highness, it is quite well known that you are no longer in the Spade Castle. His highness, Prince Lunard simply told the nobles that the Princess had left the castle for your protection but those evil nobles were snickering around and spreading a rumor that you been married off instead. Everyone believes that you are at the Duchy of Cancer as that whole place were closed off."

Dream flinched by the last information she heard. She could not believe that the news could travel this fast. However she is glad that Lunard managed to hide the truth about the death of the Duke of Cancer.

But Dream is still full of questions.

"How did you?" Dream wants to know how Howard knew she is the millennial princess.

"How can't I?" Howard looked at Dream with warm expression but then shook his head. "Honestly I feel ashamed that the other villagers did not even realize. Your Royal Highness look absolutely an spitting image of them. The King of Spade, Joseph Walker and Lady Magdalene Virgo of Clover. Then there is your name, Walker, who everyone known was passed down by the King himself to his only daughter. Moreover..."

Howard gently hold Dreams skinny warmth hands.

"This healing powers that have a rare glow tint of the Earth. It is unmistakenly from the power of Clover which I only had seen from her benevolent  Lady Magdalene."

Howard chuckled to himself.

"Probably that is the reason the villagers did not noticed. When I was young, Lady Magdalene helped us once and I followed her around. She was secretly healing the villagers that was sick."

Howard softly laughed at himself again. He looks like he is remembering a very precious memory.

"She makes sure nobody sees her. Then of course I saw it as I followed her around. And she hushed me gently not to tell anyone and bribed me with some food and tea, but then the King found out and reprimanded Lady Magdalene. Even though the King was mad, his face was full of worry instead. Lady Magdalene just halfheartedly apologizes and just do more healing behind her husband's back."

Howard looked down to himself, it is not because it is a sad memory of someone that had passed, but because it is a memory of an important person. To Howard's young mind back then, the King and his wife are the most incredible people he had met, and it is until now. He will never forget their benevolence and so, when he suspected just a little bit, he already made up his mind that the person in front of him is no other than the child of the two most incredible people that he met only once when he was young.

"Please do not feel any anger towards the villagers. We are in dire need and nobody wants to go back at the dark times. The Lady and the king of Spade had tried so hard for all of us and we want to treasure that at the least. That is the only way we could pay them back."

"I don't feel such feelings. Do not worry." Dream wants to assure Howard that she did not hold any grudge towards her people.

When Dream looked down, her hair slowly hit by the moonlight. As the moon shines down upon her hair, it slowly turned back to it's original color. Dream then looked back to Howard woth her scarlet eyes.

Howard looked at the now red eyes in front of him. Night had removed the disguise it put on Dream. There is no point for it anymore. Night also wants the man to see Dream's true image as the owl admired the man's personality.

Howard let out a gentle smile after seeing the King's face and Lady Magdalene's face on the child's features. He started tearing up.

"The Spade is a very dangerous place for you, Princess."

Dream flinched.

"As people start going back to the old days before we met the King and the Lady Magdalene, everyone will be desperate. We had a taste of that moment of freedom and richness and no one wants to let it go. The people of Spade might start to retaliate against the nobles. Nobles will be desperate to grab ahold of the only child of the King of Spade as you are a very precious person to us and will be use to suppress the people."

"O-only child?"

"We are not sure of how the former king's sons will move but the two younger princes are dangerous. Please never trust them."

Dream felt like the tip of her fingers starting to get cold. How much important information that her father hid? And for what reason? Then what of the Queen of Spade?

"I heard this as a passing rumor from the traveling merchants. They know I am closed with the passing Cloverians before the Country closed itself. They said that some Cloverians had been captured but most of them are in the center in between Diamond and Heart Country. And waiting for the barrier to  open. They are currently under the protection of Lady Queenie that have the Heart Seal. I believe joining them will be great beneficial for you princess. The Cloverians will protect you no matter what."

Howard stood up and point his finger towards the North. "Please just go straight and don't wander off from the trail. This trail is what the merchants used that goes to Heart Country. I believe along the way you will meet them."

Dream looked down to the puppies and then to Apple. Night stealthily moved from Howard's shadow to Apple's shadow.

"Please go as far away before day break."

Dream looked back to Howard. Her eyes are filled with longing. She looked back to the village.

"Please do not worry. We will be fine. Spade will be fine until your royal highness comes back. We Spadians are sturdy and resilient. We will hold off for now."

Howard look proud.

Dream smiled, even though her heart feels hurt leaving her people like this for her own safety, there are things she have to do first in order to achieve a better future.

Dream then picked up a small stone from the ground. She then blessed it with all her might. She ran towards Howard and pushed the stone to his hand.

"Leave this inside the room that I blessed. I hope that it will last long and everyone that is sick and stay in that room heals gradually but surely."

Howard gently caressed the small warm stone that still had a green tint of glow.

Howard smiled for the last time and bid his farewell.

"We will always wish great health and great fortune for our one and only Princess, your royal highness Princess Dream Walker of Spade."

....

"Child, stop crying."

Night looks worried as it stare at the crying girl.

Night is not invisible and perched itself on Dream's shoulder. It then gently whisk it's dark feathered wings to cast a disguise on Dream. Night decided to make Dream's hair a darker blonde and her eyes gray in color. Dream now looks like a child between a Spadian and a Diamondian.

"Hic, hic!"

Dream continue on sobbing. Dream realized that ever since she started letting go her emotions and cried for the first time, it been harder to hold on to her tears.

Now they fall like rain. However, this might be because she is frustrated being a child and not being able to take on her responsibilities.

"I only hic o-only h-heal them a little, I-I hic only g-gave so little and I am just leaving like this-!"

Leaving the people who loves her parents so much just like this is frustrating to this little royal.

"Aish.... Your sense of responsibility is quite strong. Listen child...."

Night slowly patted Dream's head.

"You did not ask to be born as a Royal. Yes your blood holds great responsibilities but you are a child. You have to act like one until those people decide, you are their ruler. Don't you see how the little child Howard treats you?"

"Lit-tle? Hic-!" Dream is surprised that Night is calling a man with six feet tall in height, little child.

"You are their princess and a princess is nothing but a child. Princes and Princesses responsibilities are to grow up with grace, honor and most of all healthy. Which is by the way every child's responsibility! Then the adults have to guide the young ones and not put burden on your young bodies and mind. Howard... No the Spade wish for their young princess' well being."

Dream took every Night's word to heart. She might be a reincarnated person but she is still a young soul with new life, new lands to venture and new sets of responsibility. Dream never had the chance to be a child even in her former life, she was busy trying to survive. Her heart feels so warm knowing there are people wished for her to grow up healthy and well.

She only used to being cursed at and being neglected. Her mother in her former life wished her dead and regretted her whole being.

The people of Spade is washing off all that dark feelings away. She is extremely grateful for this brief moment of warmness.

"I'll be back." The tint of Dream's red eyes can be seen underneath the gray eyes disguise she have. It shows her burning determination. She will be back for sure to reclaim the land of her people.

Of course, it might take years because she needs to be an adult and to be powerful.

Dream is leaving just like what Joseph did when the King was young. Probably Joseph did it so that he could grow up.

"If I may say so, even if your father failed to secure your place inside the Spade Castle, your position towards the people of Spade is quite high. If by chance you have to revolt, you will have the most entirety of Spade behind your back."

Dream flinched from that comment.

"Probably the reason your father forgo the castle, is because it have a different queen. A Queen who is not married or tied to the King. What a weird set up they have, I must say."

Dream started to deeply ponder about their weird family tree. It was common sense that a King and Queen were bonded by marriage. After all, a Queen becomes a one once they married a King.

Is Dream wrong to think that her father married two women? However, it is not customary in the entirety of the continent to have a polygamy.

"Howard said, I am the only child of the King of Spade."

Dream is the only child of Joseph here in Spade. The twins are not Joseph's children nor probably even the Crown Prince of Spade, Kahel.

"So those evil twins is totally unrelated to you! I've been telling you that Lunard xxxxx doesn't look like a Spadian at all."

"Hey, your beak!"

Dream tried to grab the owl from her shoulder but it flew away.

"It is true!"

"She still saved me!"

"Even if she did not, I would've saved you. She popped out of nowhere and I missed my chance. Also, you are not the one she saved! It was the Queen, you were just an after thought. Just admit it, that woman was jealous of you and when she found the chance to kick you out, she did!"

"It just turned out that way...."

"After all she had said?" Night landed on Apple's back. "You of all people should know. No, your reincarnated soul should know, that words are far more painful than physical pain. The scars on your body is nothing compare to the invisible scars inside. The scars on the body gave you a feel of relief because it is a sign that the wound heal. But the scars in your soul is not something you can see and like a stigma they persist and continue on to bleed with no trigger or warning."

Dream looked down as an admit to defeat.

"Never take in such painful words like last time. Never let it inside, you have to fight them off. So that no other shadow fall on your heart."

Night looked proud at the girl who listened to him well.

"I should be the only shadow around you."

"Yes."

Night's eyes twitch. He feels like he is raising this young soul. This young soul that even though over a thousand old, still have a lot of growing to do.

Night patted Dream's head once more. He stared at Dream's despondent look.

"We can stopped by on some villages along the way." Night gave in like a hen to it's chick.

"Eh!" Dream's eyes sparkled.

"Don't look so excited. You never learn, you will make Howard worried."

Night chuckled. This soul is truly 'God's most favored child.' Night cannot help it but pamper this child.

"This time you will have to be more discreet and only use your powers when I am around."

"Roger!"

Dream is happy that she can at least help some Spadians along the way. She then started browsing for pretty stones while they walk. It is the best way to give her powers without being noticed.

Night happily watched the young girl hopping forward and picking up small stones.

"By the way, I think the Spade Seal holder is in Clover."

Dream stopped walking after hearing Night's statement.

"Now that I heard Howard's statement earlier. It looks like no one can get in and no one can get out. Cloverians will never leave their own behind unless it is in the sense of urgency. Back in the ancient times, Clover had done that. Clover had sealed of the whole country of Spade to save the people from the lurking darkness which is the great me."

Dream choke from Night's last statement. How can he be so narcissistic even about his dark times.

"Yes, I was so powerful and great that it took Clover her whole powers to create a spell."

"A spell."

"It is a spell that will work with the seal. However it eats the life force of the land and the seal holder. Clover stake her life knowing she is an angel and she have the power of healing. Moreover, she is more than willing as she is 'God's Favored Child.' It is lot less burden on her as she just needs to continue on healing the land so that her life force will not be used."

Dream realized where the owl is going.

"A seal bearer is staking it's life to close and protect the whole country of Clover?"

"You..." Night pointed his feathered wing to Dream. "You are the Clover, the sleeping child in the central is the Diamond, that xxxxx Lunard have somewhat a smell of the Heart but also not but my hunch is telling me the Heartians still have the seal as I feel the Heart seal strongly up North. "

"The Spade seal bearer is in Clover."

"And that Spadian is related to you."

"H-how..."

Dream remembered the old man she met when she turned one. For some reason his face became vivid in her mind.

"Believe it or not... The Cloverians are all nice but they have a hidden dark side on them."

Night said that with a really serious expression.

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