(Forty eight chapter)
The first thing that Namjoon noticed when he walked up the stairs was how widely his door was open, easy to notice and it aroused questions in his head. How was his door open when he shut it before leaving?
Unless someone entered it.
He didn't know why or who it could be but it was necessary for him to check it in case any robber was also present. Carefully he climbed up the stairs, sticking to the wall as he tried to peek in side his room but saw nothing.
Then he heard it.
Small, soft giggles were enunciated by someone inside his room and Namjoon's eye brows shot upwards because he knew those chuckles were something he had heard before and finally decided to check the person in his room.
But what Namjoon saw next was not anything he anticipated.
Sowon stood there at his table, her back towards his direction as her arms were wrapped around her torso, small laughs escaping her lips and the sight definitely shocked Namjoon.
"Sowon?"
Namjoon asked in confusion, not expecting to have Sowon inside his room since he knew she was avoiding him, lest imagine her giggle happily like this. Was she okay?
Her body visibly froze, Sowon's arms limply falling back to their sids and a loud thud followed by. Namjoon looked down, noticing that a book was dropped on the floor.
He looked up again, this time, noticing how messily his book collection were sprawled over the table, allowing a surge of annoyance to cross his face.
"What are you doing here?"
Namjoon tried to sound polite but the sight of his books carelessly thrown like that really touched a nerve. He dearly loved books because they gave him so much knowledge and one of his peeves was when people didn't know how to appreciate books or poorly treat them.
Sowon stood rigidly and Namjoon thought he heard her gulp but fixed his attention on the girl, awaiting for her response.
"I-I…"
"You what?"
Namjoon crossed his arms, tilting his head as he patiently waited for the female to answer his question. He observed how slowly she turned around to face him and seeing her pale face gave him the impression that something was wrong.
"I, um…"
"Sowon is everything okay?" Namjoon asked in worry and felt relief when the girl nodded silently, "then what are you doing in my room?"
"I can explain!"
Sowon suddenly exclaimed in panic but Namjoon only shrugged, "I thought you were trying to explain it already?"
When the girl didn't answer for long or raised her head to look into his eyes, Namjoon walked over towards his table and began to grab his pile of scattered books.
Within a minute he was successful in returning the books to their original stand at the corner of the desk.
"Sowon?"
He asked again but there was no reply and Namjoon quietly sighed. When he was about to turn to face Sowon, Namjoon noticed another book lying on the ground beside her feet.
He bend down and was about to pick up the book before it was suddenly snatched away by another hand and the momentum caught him off guard. Straightening his back, Namjoon looked up in surprise to see Sowon holding a book in her hands.
"Isn't that my book?"
Namjoon didn't understand why Sowon was trying to secretly take his books when she could and easily borrow from him. He eyed the book, brows fur rowing when he observed it as a vaguely familiar book.
"No, its mine."
Sowon roughly answered, trying to hide the book in her arms.
"What is it?"
"My diary."
Namjoon remained silent for a moment then spoke, "so you came in to take back your diary, not for other reasons."
"No."
"Nothing else?"
Sowon swallowed, "no."
"Not even to meet or talk with me?"
"No-" Sowon looked up, "wait why would I try to meet you and talk about what?"
Namjoon heaved a sigh, running a hand over his silver blonde hair which caught Sowon's attention but she pretended not to notice it.
"Just forget it."
"How vague. Why don't you answer me properly?"
Namjoon didn't respond, glancing over the window and not at the female. Sowon set aside the urge to groan and stomp her foot loudly.
"At least be a man to say it properly. I asked what do you expect me to talk with you about?"
"Oh I don't know, maybe about why you were constantly avoiding me since the day we went to the picnic."
Namjoon snapped back, mildly annoyed but more unhappy at how ignorant the girl was pretending to be in front of him. He just couldn't understand why girls never told men about everything directly be it good or bad instead of just avoiding them or being in sour mood.
Sowon stared at the male in surprise for a moment, not expecting him to notice her little distance from him. She had did her best to keep it normal and minimum then how did he notice it? Then she remembered the actual reason and anger surged in her blood.
After all his plans, how could he ask me such a question?
"I have my reasons."
"I'd like to know them please." Namjoon retorted sarcastically.
"You don't deserve to."
Sowon spat bitterly and moved to walk out of the room but Namjoon stopped her with an arm, putting her back to her previous position.
"Enlighten me since I am directly related to it."
"You know what? Forget it. You are so dense no wonder I despise being around you."
"So now, out of the blue, you hate me. What made you feel so bitter about me suddenly?"
Sowon glared at the male, not wanting to tell him the truth why she hated or the reason why Namjoon didn't directly talk to her about his plan to leave this place and pretend like strangers once the time comes, probably would leave her much more affected and vulnerable because he knew too much about her life.
Heck Namjoon even knew so much more about Sowon which she never realised until he came along. And his masterplan after all these time they spend and got along, he would just disappear without any care. How was the justifiable?
Maybe it was guilt that she eavesdropped on Namjoon's and Haneul's conversation and heard everything of his plan. Honestly Sowon now hated the plan more than Namjoon and she didn't understand why.
"Cat got your tongue?"
"No, in fact, I have it right here."
To show her unnecessary point Sowon rolled out her tongue and showed it at Namjoon like a small kid making fun of her classmate in Kindergarten. The male stood there, not expecting Sowon to literally show her tongue in midst of their serious argument.
Not that he minded it since she looked cute but that was not important now. He had more urgent matters to look into, like why was she mad at him for.
"Seriously?"
Namjoon deadpanned and Sowon caught herself in the remedy of embarrassment, more like awkwardness. Even she herself didn't know why she did such a silly action which was not called for. Possibly because she had no replies to retort back against 'Mr Arrogant' but also did not wanted to submit her pride and admit her defeat.
Now they stood there awkwardly, both wondering what could help them overcome the tense atmosphere surrounding the two adults. Namjoon cleared his throat to get rid of an invisible lump and Sowon averted her eyes to the walls because they seemed more interesting at the moment.
"Sowon, we are not done talking here. Please tell me the reason why you are angry at me, at least let me know and rectify it."
"Rectify it?" Sowon scoffed, now setting her eyes on the male in front of her, "you can stop the burning fire Namjoon but you can never stop the damage it causes in it's wake."
The awkward tension now dissipated into more tense and tight setting, unknown and unsaid feelings spurring in the hearts and minds of the two youth but none tried to act on it for the fear of consequences. So they decided to speak, destroy with words and not actions.
"Fire?" Namjoon repeated, not understanding the metaphor.
"Like this analogy Namjoon, you will take time to understand what I mean and when you do, it will be too late."
Sowon stepped closer to the said male, her eyes transfixed on his magnificent body sculpture and glorious facial aspects before they settled onto the dark chocolate eyes staring back with almost same intensity.
She didn't know what took over her rational side of mind but at the moment, Sowon didn't wanted to think if anything was right or wrong. She just wanted to let Namjoon know about her thoughts, her mixed feelings about his decision to leave.
"So please," her voice lowered to a softer tone, "rethink about it and take the better decision. There can be better ways than just leaving."
The male was still confused but Sowon didn't want to bother telling him more when her plan was to let him know about her feelings without actually telling him the reason why for. It was a paradoxical and stupid finding but the best shot.
Pushing past Namjoon, she held the diary in her hands and quickly rushed out of his room, making a beeline for her own safe place and shut the door before any interruption.
"It's okay Sowon, you did great."
Mixed feelings of regret, guilt, disappointment and much more filled her heart and it was tough for the girl not to burst into tears. Sowon didn't know why Namjoon's plan bothered her so much but one thing was absolutely sure.
She would be extremely affected if he really leaves.
A/N: This book has garnered so much love and I can't thank all of you enough. I love you all, even my silent readers❤😭