This is my favorite chapter! Im excited about this one.
♪: I think there are three songs that could fit this chapter.
Hear You Me by Jimmy Eat World
If You Leave by Nadasurf
One Day by Trading Yesterday
________________________________________
"Whats the surprise?" Ellie asked when I folded her eyes and took her to her room. We were playing cards in the guest room. Luke was with us because he wanted to see Ellie's surprise face.
We spent the whole morining upstaris because there were things being "set up" in the backyard. i told her i wanted to go to the guest room. She found me weird but Luke told some jokes and Ellie forgot to ask the questions.
I unfolded her eyes; her jaw dropped as she saw this huge painting that i drew on the wall. A picture of Sunset blvd. The surprise almost brought tears to her eyes.
"I know you how much you love California..so yeah..." I said.
"This is so beautiful. Oh my....thank you so so much. I love it!" she hugged me. She was about to cry.
"Dont you think you overreact? All i did was carrying the buckets to your room." Luke said humorously.
"There's more." I said and looked out the window. All the people were here.
"What? Theres more surprises?"
"Yep, follow me." I said.
We went to the backyard, where i set up a rock concert for her. Luke gave her the fake ticket I made. It said 'Good Charlotte world tour 2012 All Access'. Ellie smiled when she looked at it.
All of her family was there, her parents, her aunt and uncle and Lily. I invited Daniel and James as well. Since this was supposed to be a concert, i wanted more people to come.
I went to dress up like Joel Madden, who was the lead singer in Good Charlotte. I had fake tattoos on my arms. I wore all black and put my hair like Joel did. A little spikey. I stood on the stage and saw Luke, Lily, Daniel, James chat with her. I grabbed the mic with Luke's guitar in my other hand. I introduced myself in an american accent. I didnt think anyone would notice how bad my fake accent was except Ellie's dad.
We believe, we believe.....
In this love
We are all the same
Human in all our ways and all our pains......
As I walk through the valley Of the shadow of L.A.
The footsteps that were next to me have gone their separate ways
After singing 'We Believe', I sang 'The River' afterwards. It was a really fast song, especially when the drum obsessively hitting in the beginning. Luke came on stage to be the drummer. I screwed up a little but it was not bad. Ellie was just full of surprises because you would never thought a girl like her, liked punk music. Okay not really punk, like pop punk, but still. You would expect she wore all black all the time and had heavy eye makeup. To be honest, I used to think she was the kind of girl who grew up listening to opera or reading French poems. And maybe that was why i took it slow in our friendship because she was totally out of my league.
I was looking at her and she was beautiful. Ellie put her hands up and clapped with my friends. Her parents just watched Ellie from the side and smiling.
Lily jumped up and down, looking really happy. Daniel picked her up and put her on the shoulders. I didnt know they were already friends. Beau took Ellie's hands all of a sudeen and spun her around. She looked down and smiled. I just liked the smile she made when she was shy. So cute.
We are like a big happy family. I love this.
-Ellie's POV-
I couldnt tell if i was dreaming or not. Jai was just the sweetest boyfriend. Everything was perfect. People that i loved were all here. The best thing was that my parents got back together. This was more like a party but i was satisfied.
Jai came off the stage and walked slowly towards me. He had a CD player with him. He put down and I ran to hug him. Maybe i didnt need to go to a Good Charlotte's concert.....seeing a guy who would willing to do all this for me was enough.
"Joel, your hair looks nice."
"Thanks." he beamed and played a few strings.
"You know the last time i sang Stolen at the party, i wasnt going to impress other people at school, i wanted you to have good impressions on me. So is Stolen still your favorite song?"
"Yes, it is my favorite song at the moment. Wait, how did you......you stalk me blog!"
Then he started to sing.
You have stolen my heart, you have stolen my heart
And from the ballroom floor we are in celebration
One good stretch before our hibernation
Our dreams assured and we all, will sleep well.
"I think you did steal my heart." Jai whispered into my ear. And he saw me smirking.
I had this stupid dream. I always dreamed about someone singing this to me. Someone, as in someone who i liked of course. He completed my dreams. This stupid dream and the concert one.
"I almost forgot to return this to you. Here is your iPod." he gave it to me.
"I have been looking for it for days! Why did you take it?"
"I needed it to do this...thing."
"What thing?"
"I kind of made a mix CD. Anyway, I ran through your iPod. You listen to My Chemical Romance, Sum 41, 30 seconds to mars....How mad are you? Im suprised. Is there any other secrets that you want to share with me? Like a tattoo on your back or something?"
"I dont listen to their songs as much as i used to."
"Why?"
"Before i met you, i was...not really happy, so i listened to...those kinds of songs when i felt down. You save me. You are my angel. If it were for you, i would be trapped in my little bubble. I would have been miserable because of my eating disorder. If it were for you, I would have attacked by Kyle."
I didn't know why I suddently said all those words at once. My ture feelings. It was cheesy but it was literally how i felt about him.
I guess it was because I knew I didn't have much time left.
"No, Im just a piece of shit. We are two people from different worlds yet you accept me. Im clueless and just...not smart at all. I ask you stupid questions all the time. Im not like Caleb, who always seems so confident. I dont speak.....whatever that language is, but you chose me over him. Am i the luckiest guy in the world or what?" he said.
I smiled. "You are not clueless. You are cute. Maybe we are different and thats why i like you." He was not afraid to ask about things that he didnt know and just different in so many ways. I couldnt list the things i loved about him because it would take me forever to write. I realized that sometimes you just liked things for no particular reasons. It was not a math problem. there was no a certain answer.
"Well, then you must like me a whole lot." he grinned.
"Caleb speaks French by the way." I giggled.
"Thats gay."
"How does that make him gay?"
"I dont know. I just like to say that." he shrugged.
I ruffled his hair and then he cupped my face. His smile was so memorizing. I would never get used to it.
He stroked my cheeks and leaned in. I wanted to kiss him but...my dad. We should go to somewhere else.
"I was going to ask you...what can i do with this ticket? All access, huh?"
"Mmm.....go on a date with the lead singer....at the park."
I chuckled. I went to tell my parents that i was going to the park when they were chatting with my aunt and uncle.
He grabbed the CD player with him. I didnt know why he couldnt leave the CD player.
The sun went down and it made the park even more beautiful. It was quite. The only thing i could here was the fountain.
We sat down on a bench and i lied on his laps. He played with my hair while using the other hand to press some random bottoms on the CD player.
"Whenever the next song came on the radio, its our song." he said.
"Okay." i frowned.
Chris Brown's With You came up. I handt listened to this song for so long. I looked at the CD player and it showed 'track 1'. It was not from the radio. He made a CD. This was the mix CD! I almost forgit i had with you on my iPod, i just hadnt listened to it for a really long time.
"You plan this!" I stood up.
"Yes i do." he tittered.
"What if i say.............this is our song?" I took out my iPod. I put one earphone in his ear and the other in mine.
"Fix you?" he said and i nodded. I rested my head on his chest, taking the warmth from him. We began dancing slowly.
"I wish i could fix you."
He already did though.The hole in my chest was long gone. The loneliness and emptiness were not killing me anymore. Before he came into my life, i was a loner at school, who had to watch people enjoying their life. One of the things that i hated the most was when teacher asked us to get in groups and i always had to be that girl who stood alone. People didnt hate me, they just didnt want to get to know me because i was boring.
The song was over and I leaned against the tree.
"Just hold me. Thats how you can fix me." i whispered. He wrapped me in a tight hug. I just wanted to hide in his arms forever; i didnt want to face the world; i just wanted to be with him forever.
He pulled away and picked up a sharp stone.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
He carved 'E+J'.
"I thought you didn't like cheesy things." I said.
"Why would you think that?"
"You dont like Twilight. Since when you become cheesy anyway?"
"Falling in love will do that to you."
"Maybe you should watch Twilight again."
"Oh, maybe i should."
Our lips crushed against each other and i let his tongue in. The way held my waist....like I was going to disappear the next minute. It made me want to cry. I didn't know how long our kiss lasted but it was long enough for me to picture myself having a future with him. Going to college together, having late night talks and waking up next to him....It was sweet yet bitter. Life was so unfair. I was smitten by him. I fell in love with him, head over heals. I didnt know what my life would be if i didnt meet him. He came along when everything in my life was about to fall apart. He was a gift for me.
****** Six months later
-Jai's POV-
I didnt get into UCLA or any other schools in the UC system but i got into a university in San Fransisco. I couldnt apply to UCLA since they didnt provide foreign students with scholarships. I wanted to study art. Drawing was my one of the things that i enjoyed. Thanks Ellie for letting me know that. I got a scholarship. Yes, i became one of the top students. Not as good as Ellie but it was good enough for me to get into a college in the States. All thanks to Ellie. Once i knew i got in, i went to tell her.
It had been a year since the day we've met, so it was actually a good anniversary gift for her.
She was in the hospital at that time. She looked tired but she got really excited when i told her the news.
I photoshoped Ellie and I. Pretending we were on the Hollywood sign mountain, Chinese theater, and other famous places in L.A. I stuck all the photos on the wall. I hoped these photos would make her feel like home.
"It would be awesome if we could really go to these places." I said when i know she couldnt go anywhere in this condition.
"I know, but i think i dont miss los angeles like i used to."
"Why? Because my amazing photoshop skills?" I said.
"Because you are my home, Jai Brooks. I belong with you."
"I love you."
"I love you too." she said weakly.
These few months seemed like a blur. It seemed like i was living in fast forward. Senior's photo, graduation, formal...everything had ended. I took a full time job near my house. I had to save some money. But when the fall semester started, i would go to America.
I felt sorry for Ellie because she got it all figured it out and now she couldnt go anywhere.
Life sucked.
*** Another four months
The ocean of pain crushed over me. The funeral was over and Ellie was gone. Beau, Luke , Meghan, Caleb and my mom had already left. I plodded down the stairs after taking a last look at Ellie's room. Her parents were waiting for me in the living room. My mind was in an endless loop.
"You can keep this. We dont know how to use it anyway." Her mom handed me her blue iPod.
"Are you sure?"
"Of course." her mom said.
I took her bule iPod from her mom, observing it. It was old with all these scratches. Her parents kind of just looked at me touching the scratches carefully and flipping the iPod around. It looked like it had been through a serious of battles, just like Ellie. It was so fragile....life was so fragile....I felt the room was loaded with this unbearing sadness.
"She changed me. I would never thought i would get into a college. She was...like the most wonderful person i had ever met." i had to use past tense. Past tense....
"You changed Ellie too. She told me about her eating disorder a few weeks ago. I couldnt believe i didnt notice. She recovered...magically. That was like........impossible. Thank you. " her mom said. Her voice was still weak from all the crying. She looked really worn out.
We stood up and her dad patted me on the shoulder. He didnt say much this whole morning. And then he gave me a strong one-arm hug.
"Take care, kid." her dad said.
"Thanks, you take care too." I said. They walked me to the door and we waved goodbye. I walked to the park, our park. This placed that used to remind me of the time i spent we my grandparents but now this place was filled with my memories with Ellie. It was the third time that i went here. Everything was still the same and that was why i felt sorrowful. The bitterness swallowed me. I wasnt sure if i could be that carefree type of person again.
I found the tree that i carved letters in and touched the 'E' one last time."Bye, Ellie." I said to myself. I had been holding back the whole time. But i didnt want to do this anymore. I began bawling.
I let the tears dropped until they could fall no more. The tears blurred my vision but i couldnt bother to wipe it away.
My mom, Beau and Luke took me to the airport. They didnt talk much. Beau and mom just exchanged some comments about the weather and that was about it.
I would go to LA first. Ellie's hometown.
***Jai arrived in LA.
I rented a car and drove on the Santa Monica Blvd.The weather was great, just like Ellie said. No wonder she would like LA so much. I hoped the weather was good in San Fran too.
I listened to Ellie's playlist as i driving down the road. She had a playlist called 'California' and it only got four songs. I had never heard the songs before but I liked them already. They were really relaxing. I felt the soft wind on my face...it was nice and it reminded me of the feeling when Ellie's hands in mine.
I parked the car and went to the places where Ellie used to go. It was easy to find because those places were only fifteen minutes away from the place i parked the car. The steak house was closed yet the yogurt store was not. There was a couple sitting outside the store, having yogurt and the girl smiled at something that the boy said. The boy shrugged and smiled bigger. They looked so happy and I was captivated by it. I just stood there looking at them. The boy gave me a look and then I walked away even though I didn't want to.
After wandering around the street, I finally went down the beach. There were actually a lot of people and noises near me but I seemed to zone out somehow.
I took out a photo of us from my wallet and began remembering things. The photo was taken at John's party and it was our first photo; Meghan sent me this a few months ago and i put it in my wallet from then on. I couldnt believe Ellie didnt mention this picture before. Although i couldnt really see her face in this photo, i still loved it and i didnt know why. I remembered one time i was studying with her and i drew a little house on her test paper and the way she looked at me...like i was doing something really great. I was useless but she idolized me, which was pretty amusing. In five years, I was sure I would still remember the 'big events' that happened in our life: the amusement park, her cousin's birthday party, me throwing a punch on a stalker's face for her, the magical dance we had that night, our first kiss.....but I hope I would still remember the smaller things because they meant so much to me.....the broken smile she gave me when she thanked me for sitting with her every day at lunch time, the fact that she tended to wear black on Friday and she always went to Taco Bell before a Spanish final but only ordered a raspberry tea. It was hilarious and just too cute.
I wished she was here with me. I knew i was with the right person when i became a better man. Actually she made me more of a man; i was not a boy anymore.
I could not imagine ever feeling that way about someone else ever again.
If you ask me do i still miss her?
Everyday.
The End
____________________________________
This is probably not a happy ending but I really like it bc Jai finally achieved something, haha (and Ellie's parents got back together, so its not exactly a sad story right?)
i dont know how many people are readin this, but thanks for the lack of support :)