You didn't feel like leaving your room today, but you knew if you missed any classes you would kill yourself for it later (not actually kill), you got up and got dressed but decided to leave your hair down and curled today, you grabbed your things and left your dorm being careful as to not wake Pansy
You hated that you had to avoid all of your friends to avoid Draco but you would make it up to them later. You made your way down to the common room and quietly exited, you decided not to bother Harry, Hermione, or Ron today and headed straight to the Great hall, it was only 6:55 so they would be serving breakfast in five minutes
You entered the Great Hall and sat at the griffyndor table, there were about 15 students in the Great Hall including you, and one of them was Neville who was sitting towards the end of the griffyndor table reading one of our textbooks "Flesh eating Trees of the World"
"Hey Nev" you said smiling at him
"Oh, hey Y/n" he said looking up at you
"You're reading one of our textbooks?"
"Yeah, I made it to page 96"
"That's great, mind if I sit with you?"
"Sure" Neville smiled at you
You took a seat next to Neville leaving your stuff where it was in the middle of the table, you sighed and tried to pay attention while Neville talked but your mind blanked out and all you could think about was Draco, Draco's eyes, Draco's smile that people rarely ever see, Draco's hair, Draco's smell, but worst of all you couldn't stop thinking about how Draco hurt you, he knew what Cedric did to you yet he still acted just like him and for what? Because you had a friend he didn't like?
"Hey Y/n, you're here early" Hermione said as she walked around the table to the side you were on
"Uh- yeah, I woke up pretty early and just decided to get a head start on the day" you lied, but it was a believable lie
"Hey Nev, I'm going to go sit with them, do you want to come?"
Neville shook his head no "I'm ok Y/n, thanks for asking though....its more than what most people do"
You gave Neville a sad smile and hugged him before sitting next to Hermione and opposite of Harry
"How'd you sleep?" Hardly asked looking at you
"I slept well, why do you ask?"
"Courtesy, and because you were here so early"
"I got here at 6:55 that's only five minutes before breakfast starts"
"Most people don't even come down until 7:30 for breakfast and that's just the "early" people"
"Well I woke up a little early and had nothing better to do"
"What about Malfoy? Shouldn't you be with him as he walks you to every class" Harry rolled his eyes remembering Draco's words the first day of classes
You giggled a little, despite the Draco talk Harry's reaction was funny "Nope, I can walk on my own" you tried to say it as nonchalantly as you could, you really didn't want to explain the situation but you could tell Harry called bullshit
"Yeah, I suppose you can" Harry said in a questioning voice, questioning the situation not if you could walk in your own
Ron interrupted the moment to talk about quidditch and you were so thankful for that
You rested your hand on your cheek and propped yourself up listening to Ron speak, you noticed Lena walk in with Luna, they were holding hands, you quickly got up and walked over to them, they were halfway to the Ravenclaw table "Omg, are the LL's official?!"
"Yup, as official as official can get" Lena said as she kissed Luna
You squealed "Im so happy for you two"
Luna hugged you "Thank for being accepting of this, we know quite a few people who aren't"
You smiled "No problem Luna, I will always accept you for you, I'll accept both of you"
You said your goodbyes and see you laters and went and sat back down next to Hermione, just as you sat down Draco entered with Pansy, she slapped his arm hard, you knew she was trying to get information out of him but he ignored her which made her even more mad than she already was
Draco looked at you and you looked away from him, for a moment you thought you saw his eyes soften but then next time you looked at him they were cold again, must've been your imagination
Blaise and Theo entered shortly after and waved at you before sitting down, you waved back smiling at them
Breakfast was fairly long for you considering you'd been there since before it started, you finished breakfast and decided you were going to head to class, Hermione and Harry decided to leave with you,as you got up and started walking Harry whispered something to Hermione
"Hey Y/n I'm going to go to the restroom before we leave, you can start walking with Harry though"
"Okay, we'll walk slow" you said to Hermione as she started walking away
You started walking with Harry
"Y/n, what's going on with you and Draco" Harry asked concerned
You looked down at the floor, you knew this would happen "N-nothing, he was just being a prick"
Harry knew Draco, he knew this was true, but he knew you better, even better than you knew yourself "Theres more, isn't there?"
"Maybe...."
"Y/n you can tell me, we've been best friends since first year" you truly were best friends with Harry, he was the first friend you made at Hogwarts which is shocking considering your a slytherin, you have a lot of best friends but Harry was by far the best (don't tell Pansy or Theo, although the tie for second place)
"He-" you struggled to find a way to explain what happened "He acted like Cedric....he was possessive and jealous...and angry, so so angry..."
Harry grew angrier the more you spoke "I'll kill him, I'll kill that blasted Malfoy!"
"Harry, it's ok really...I've been avoiding him that's why I've hung out with you and Hermione and Ron so much, I've cooled down and I'm hoping he has too" you placed your hand in Harry's
Harry seemed to calm down as you held his hand "I just don't want to see you hurt Y/n, I care about you"
"I know, but murdering Malfoy isn't the answer"
Harry hugged you as he stroked your hair, you felt calm, you had forgotten how much Harry helps you
"I'm back" Hermione said just as you and Harry were breaking your hug
"Hey, ready to go?" You asked Hermione
"Yep"
You walked with Harry and Hermione to Herbology and just as you got there the bell rang
Harry gave you a smile "I'll see you in charms"
You smiled back at him
"Bye Hermione" Harry said before walking off
-Time Jump-
Your classes went by and it was now dinner time, in Potions you sat next to Parvati Patil and ignored Draco to the best of your abilities, Charms was lovely you just talked with Harry the whole time and took notes on the lesson
During dinner you of course sat at the gryffindor table next to Harry, once dinner was done you headed to the library for your study date with Hermione and Harry
You all sat down at a table in the middle of the library and started taking notes on all of your classes, sharing information that one of you might have missed during class
"I'm going to go find a book for Transfiguration, I'll be right back" Hermione said as she left the table and headed towards the back of the library
Harry suddenly looked nervous and started tapping his foot on the floor "Hey Y/n, there's something I have to tell you"
"What is it Harry?"
Harry turned to face you and he grabbed both of your hands holding them as he looked into your eyes "Yesterday... we did Amortentia and when I smelled it I-" Harry took a deep breath "I smelled you, Lavender, Champagne and Honey, and Chamomile, the same scent you've had since first year, the same scent that would linger in my room every time we had a sleepover"
You were dumbfounded at this information, you couldn't form words "I-...I love you Y/n"
"Harry I-"
You saw Draco out of the corner of your eye, oh no, no no no no no
You stood up as Draco exited the library, you chased after him as he entered the abandoned girls bathroom "Draco, it's not what it looks like"
"Oh really?! It's not what it looks like!" Draco was fuming "Because what I saw was you about to snog fucking Pottah!"
"Draco I wasn't" you could barley get the words out of your throat, you've never seen Draco so made before, you were terrified
Draco stepped closer to you as you stepped back "And to think I was coming to apologize to you, well you know what you don't deserve an apology!" "Diggory was right, you're just an attention whore who will snog any dumbass who takes an interest in your pathetic little ass!" "You don't deserve me, you don't deserve love"
You were so shocked and terrified by what just happened you didn't even realize the tears streaming form your eyes, you tried to speak but no words came out, your body went numb As you fell to the ground sobbing
Draco exited the bathroom leaving you there, you've never felt so worthless in your entire life, not even Diggory made you feel this way
You saw a broken shard of glass on the ground and before your mind could even process what you were doing you sliced all the way up your wrists, you screamed in pain as the blood dripped onto your uniform, just as you were about to do the other wrist Hermione entered the bathroom
"Y/n!" Hermione yelled in horror
You had no idea what happened after that, you blacked out and awoke in the infirmary, Madame Pomfrey had cleaned and bandages your wounds, your positive she gave you a numbing potion too because you couldn't feel the hurt anymore...you kind of wished you still could
You turned your head to find Harry holding your hand leaning on your bed, you squeezed his hand slightly and his head shot up, he was crying
"Oh Y/n, I was so worried about you" Harry sniffled out as he held your hand tighter
"I'm ok Harry..." you weren't, in no way possible were you ok, but you couldn't worry Harry more than you already have
"No, no you're not ok, look at you, you are in a hospital bed Y/n!"
You slightly jumped at Harry's tone still shaken by the way Draco talked to you
Harry noticed you jump "Y/n I am so so sorry I didn't mean to yell, I'm just so worried about you"
"I know you are, it's not your fault"
"Y/n, if I may ask....what happened"
You too. A deep shaky breath in and then explained to Harry all of what happened, Harry had murder on his mind
"You are not pathetic Y/n, you are perfect, you're the most amazing girl I've ever met" Harry's words made you blush, you felt a little better knowing that he meant them
"You can stay in mine and Ron's dorm, that way you won't have to run into him"
You didn't know if that was such a good idea but it's the best one for now
You nodded at Harry "Thank you Harry"
"You're welcome" Harry looked you in your eyes "You know if do anything for you right"
"I know...but Harry I don't like you like that, I love you but as a friend....I know that I liked you at some point but not now...I'm so sorry"
Harry gave a sad smile "Its ok Y/n, I kind of got that when you ran out on me" Harry gave a slight chuckle "As long as we stay friends then I'm happy"
"Of course Harry, we will always be best friends"
Harry smiled and hugged you as gently as he could, he gave you his sweater and helped put it over your head to hide the bandages on your arm
Once you were out of the infirmary you headed to the slytherin common room to grab some of the things you would need to bring to Harry's, once you entered the common room your eyes immediately fell on Draco, he was making out with some girl, Astoria, Astoria Greengrass, When Draco saw you he looked you dead in the eyes and stood up grabbing Astorias hand
"Shall we take this upstairs" you heard him say as he winked at Astoria
You watched Draco disappear up the statues and towards his room, your heart dropped and you felt as though you would throw up, you swallowed thickly and quickly went up to your room to pack your things
You wrote a note to Pansy and Lena and one to be given to Theo and Blaise before you made your way to the griffyndor commons
You made it to Harry and Ron's and set your bag on the floor, Ron came up and gave you a huge hug, you smiled to yourself and hugged him
"I'm so sorry for what happened to you Y/n"
"It's ok Ron, I'm working on being ok"
Ron told you where to put your things and as you were putting them away Harry and Hermione entered the room
Hermione gave you a hug "I was so worried about you"
You hugged her back tight "I know"
By the time all of this was done you had to go to Astronomy, when you made it to class you found Draco nowhere to be seen, you had hope that he would be here, not because you wanted to see him but because you knew that if he was here he wasn't fucking Astoria, it was a foolish thought of course he was fucking Astoria you saw all of what happened
After Astronomy you made your way back to Harry and Ron's and flopped onto Harry's bed, you fell asleep as soon as your head hit the pillow, you were exhausted