JAXON POV
It had been two months since she has been gone. For two months I've kept myself at work. Helping Alpha King with the rogues, killing some too. Training with the warriors again. Learning ways how to deal with the frustrating Alphas- learning my father's duties.
Four months and still no news of her. Patty was back in the pack after three days and some stupid part of me held hope that she might be back as well. But my heart broke into a million pieces when her car was empty. I wanted to blame Patty so badly for taking her with her but I knew it wasn't her fault. It was nobody but mine. I couldn't even text her anymore, nor call her. Because when I tried, she never replied to any of them. And it was hard to even type the words on the screen when every being of mine just wanted my arms around her, hold her in place and take in her scent. I wasn't living in the cabin anymore, but in my old room in the manor. I couldn't because her scent was fading away, each night, it felt unreal that she was ever even here.
Six months- half a year had gone by and no sign of her. No text message, no call. Even Will and Patty didn't know how she was. The only thing I knew through the bond was that she was alive. That's it, that's all I knew. That's all she wanted me to know.
X
CAROLINE POV
Six months, four days, two hours, six minutes, and thirty-two seconds. That's how long I've been away from him. I thought I'd heal but who was I kidding? I needed him badly but I wasn't gonna go, because I knew I'd end up hurting more and more.
I was still at the loft. Back on the sleeping pills- back to my old life where I never met him. Where I was this lonely woman who had given up on being happy. How dare he make me happy? How dare he made me almost love myself? How dare he hurt me?
It was Sunday, and I stood outside the balcony, getting the warm sunshine in my face. But it wasn't as warm as him. The finger where I used to have my ring felt naked, felt bare and sad.
After I came here, Patty found out that she was pregnant. And before going back home, she asked if I wanted to come, I said no. They call me sometimes but I don't pick their calls up. I can't when every time they either tell me to come back for him or tell me how much he misses me.
The doorbell rang and I sighed, walking to the door "Mrs. Spellmam, if you're looking for your cat, she's not here. I told you." I opened the door and it wasn't her. It was Will. He smiled and he looked like a literal grown-up. More buffed, grown a beard, and shorter hair. He smiled as I breathed his name "Will."
"Hello, Caroline. Been long."
I nodded my head and moved out of the way, letting him in. My stupid ass thought for a second that he might be behind him- that he might've come to get me but he wasn't. As I closed the door, he said "He doesn't know I'm here." I nodded and turned around, plastering a smile on my face "You want something? Water, beer, or a soda?" He sighed "A beer would be amazing right now." I walked to the fridge to get out the beer. I popped open the lid and slid it towards him with a straw on the side. His brow raised "A bendy straw for a wolf who's about to be a dad? Real manly, Caroline." I chuckled "How's Patty?" He took a sip as he bit his bottom lip with his mate in his mind "Sexually frustrated most of the time. Our pup is giving his mommy a really hard time." I laughed as I imagined Patty with a huge tummy. He took another sip after he said "But you would know that if you just picked up our calls."
My body tensed and I felt ashamed actually. He sighed "It's been six months, Caroline." I shook my head "I need more time, Will."
"Don't you dare lie to me that six months were not long enough for you?"
I agreed "You're right. Every day is too damn long without him."
"Don't you think it's time for you to come back to him?"
"Not yet."
"Then when?"
"When the time is right. When my heart stops hurting and my mind has stopped overthinking."
He sighed with a lazy smile "The time is never right, Caroline. It's just a lie that we tell ourselves. Do you know who taught me that? He did." My eyes began to blurry but I said with a whisper "Not yet." He huffed as I asked, "Why are you in town?"
"To tell you this myself. Luna Queen died." My eyes widen "She died in the morning. And with the full moon tonight, we'll burn her body. Give her a funeral." My heart dropped to my stomach as tears started falling down my cheeks. But I wipe them and ask "How is he?" He shrugged "He's alive if that's what you ask. He has buried himself in work. Barely sleeps, barely rests. He's punishing himself because he hurt you. He thinks it's all his fault." I scrunched the hem of my sweater in my fist "He doesn't stay in the cabin. I asked him why and he told me because every nook and corner reminds him of you. You truly broke him, Caroline. He wasn't this sad when he left the pack." I barely whisper "Why are you here?"
"He needs you. He needs you bad."
He sighed "I'll be in the car waiting for you. If you're not there in an hour, I'll go back." And he just left without uttering another word.
My mind was blank. Completely blank. My hands trembled. But even though I'm still trying to heal, he needed me, right?
I'm going.
I walked to my room, packed my bags, and went out.
Thankfully, Will was still outside and he smiled at me when he saw me with the bag. He got out of the car and took my bag from me, keeping it in the trunk as he asked "I don't remember you packing lightly last time." I said, "I'm coming for two days only and then I'm leaving again after the funeral." He looked at me disappointedly but still nodded getting back in the car.
X
I held my breath as we reached the pack walls and went inside. I kept reminding myself that I had to keep my feelings aside and only mourn for the Luna. That's what my reason was for coming back.
He parked the car and we got out. He grabbed my back and we began walking in silence through the woods. It was cold and it looked like it will rain storms tonight.
X
We reached Patty and Will's cabin. The door opened and out came Patty wearing pink shorts and a yellow shirt with a sunflower on it. Her pregnant belly was full-on display and she looked like she was about to go into labor any time. She held up her arms and said "Pregnant lady over here! Can't stand for too long. Get your ass here now!" Will chuckled "That's what I deal with every day." She yelled, "I heard you!" He yelled back "You were supposed to!" I ran to her and she took me in her arms and I couldn't stop laughing at the fact that she couldn't fully hug me because of her belly. I felt a push against my stomach and I backup with a shock. She winked "It's a werewolf. It kicks."
"I can see that."
She grabs my hand and leads me inside. I couldn't help myself- couldn't hide my smile at the way she wobbled in like a penguin. I chuckled "You look so adorable." She shook her head "I don't feel adorable." Pointing at Will as he walked in "It's his fault! His! He couldn't keep his hands to himself. And I'm stuck with a pup in my belly, I wobble all day, I sweat all day and crave everything." She looked at me "I could eat you right now with a side of chocolate." I threw my head back laughing at her. Will said, "Oh please, you know you enjoyed every minute of it, baby." He winked at her and she blushed. She huffed "When you mate, be careful. They trick you with good sex to get you pregnant like bunnies." My laughter died as she talked about Jaxon and suddenly the atmosphere became thick. Will cleared his throat "I'll show you to the room." I nodded and kissed Patty on her forehead "Auntie Caroline is dying to meet the pup." She nodded "Auntie Caroline will help Mommy babysit too."
"Deal!"
Will took me to the guest room. Keeping my bag on the bed, he asked "You're not gonna meet him?" I shrugged "I'll meet him at the funeral." He just nodded "Get some rest. I'll call you when I have dinner ready." I raised my brow "You cook?" He nodded his head defeated "That was Patty's rule before she agreed to live with me."
"Smart girl"
"I was tricked."
We laughed and he went outside.
I didn't unpack but just lay down in the bed and soon exhausted sleep took over me.
X
I wake up two hours later to the sound of thunder outside. It was pouring. I walked out of the room to find the cabin empty. A plate of food covered on the island and a note of the fridge that said:
'We're going to the funeral. Eat up and meet us there. It starts exactly at midnight.'
I didn't feel like eating. So I kept the plate in the fridge and went into the room to change my clothes into black jeans and a black top with a navy blue trench coat.
I knew where to go. To the river at the end of the woods.
X
After a twenty-minute walk towards the river in heavy rain, I finally made it to the end of it. But I didn't join them. It had stopped raining but the dark cloud still covered the sky. I watched from afar as people gathered around. Some crying, some mourning, and some too broken for their queen. Patty crying amongst them too.
There was a wooden raft near the river where the Luna Queen was laid upon in a simple white dress. Her grey hair sprawled across the raft with white lilies in her hands that rested upon her chest. She looked like she was sleeping peacefully. And for some reason I was happy. Happy for her that she didn't feel pain anymore. She wasn't in pain like I last saw her.
A tear slipped down my cheek as I remembered her warm hugs and smiles towards me but I wipe them away and let them remain a good memory forever.
The pack fell in silence as they saw Claude walk right beside the raft as he said out loud "Wolves, we have lost a beautiful soul today. The soul that provided us with nothing but positivity and warmth for the past thirty years. Our Luna Queen. And now, her son, our Alpha Prince would like to say something too." I tried to control my breathing because I was about to see him.
I didn't notice that he was sitting amongst the other people until he stood up and walked to the raft, standing beside it. My heart broke as I looked at my wolf. He had lost weight and look exhausted with life. Dark circles were under those dark brown eyes. He had grown out stubbles that looked more like a beard. He wore black jeans and a black shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his arms that had white scars. Scars I've never seen before.
I heard his voice for the first time in six months and it sounded broken "We lost a friend, a wife, and a mother. We lost our protector- the heart and soul of the pack. But I'm glad about one thing, that she died in her sleep." He looks at her as tears start falling down his cheeks "She isn't in pain anymore. I beg the moon goddess to keep her soul and her wolf safe in heaven for eternity." I thought the Alpha King will say something too but he couldn't take his gaze off of his mate. He looked broken and exhausted. Dry tears stained his cheeks and his grey hair was disheveled. Face blank of any emotions but pain and suffering.
Moments later, the son and the husband, gathered at the raft. Both kissed Luna's forehead and Kane whispered something in her ear too. Kissing her cheek and taking her body in his arms one last time. Whispering stuff in her ear but then he lets go of her.
They both spread a white sheet on her body. Jaxon and Kane went in the river, pulling the raft with them. Halfway in there, till the water was reaching to their stomach, they pushed the raft further. Kane lit a fire on a plank of thick wood and kept it on the sheet, flaming her body. Jaxon pushed the flaming raft and the current of the water took her body away.
The body on the raft burned but in the flick of the moment, I see golden light pushing out of the flames, and right in the midnight sky, the golden turns into the face of a wolf. Aurora, I think her name was as she flies to the sky, disappearing in the dark clouds. Going to heaven. It was beautiful. I looked back down to the flames but it was gone as well as the raft and the body.
All of them turned half wolves as they howled a sad cry towards the sky- towards their goddess.
Instantly, Jaxon's head snapped towards me, his eyes glowing red. I knew he saw me but I didn't want to meet him. I turned around and made my way back into the woods.
As I walk, I hear a crunch of leaves behind me. Turning around I saw him there, in his wolf form. He stood the same as my height. I didn't say anything as he watched me with sad red eyes. His head going down as he approached me and nudged my cheek with his nose, then backing away with wide eyes. I said "Hi." His bones cracked and his body turned into his human form. He stood in front of me with a broken expression, naked, and said "I'm not imagining things, right? You're here?" I didn't answer. He bit his bottom lip as he approached me again, his hand out. Just as his fingertips contacted my cheek, he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a hug. His face buried between my shoulder and neck as he whispers with a whimper "Oh, I've missed you." I could hear shivers in his breath as he smelled me. And he held me tighter as I wrapped my arms around his waist. He whispered again "I've missed you so much."
I stayed quiet for a second until I softly pulled away from his arms, standing at least three steps away from him. I could tell by the expression on his face that he didn't like it. I noticed my ring on his wolf chain as he sighed my name "Caroline." he let out his hand to rest it on my cheek but I backed away another step. His jaw clenched as he stuttered "W-what? Why?" I plainly replied "I'm not back. I came just to pay my condolences. I'm sorry for your loss, Jax." He asked, "Where are you staying?"
"At Patty's."
"F- For how long?"
"I'm going back tomorrow night."
He whispered with a shiver "Please don't go. You said you'll be gone for a while and it has been six months. Don't you think that's enough?"
"I only said that I don't know how long it will take."
"It's been long enough."
"It hasn't, Jaxon. It really hasn't."
Before I could turn around, he grabs my left arm and puts his other hand against my cheek. He tries to lean in to kiss me but I turn my head the other way and gently get out of his grip. He looked hurt as I did that and his voice broke "Please don't leave me again. Please." I wrapped my arms around myself "I've made up my mind. I'm leaving tomorrow. Goodbye, Jaxon."
As I turn around to walk away, I hear a whimper behind me. Turning back at him, he had transformed himself into a wolf. I turn back again and began to walk and he starts walking beside me. Same speed, right beside me with his head lowered and his gaze to the ground. I said, "Tanner, stop it." But he didn't listen. I stopped and then he stopped. I walked and then he walked with me. I took a step and then he took a step. All the while not even looking up at me. I whined "This is frustrating. Stop it!" But he didn't listen. I lightly jumped and then he jumped.
I walked to the other side and he walked beside me. Just to trick him, I instantly turned in the other direction, catching him off guard but not even three steps later, I heard a growl behind me. I turned towards him in frustration but he wrapped his arms around my waist and soft lips crashed against mine. His arm was tight around my waist while his other rested gently against my cheek and I couldn't help but lean into his touch and kiss him back. I was starving for it too just like he was. My head was getting dizzy from his kiss as I held his forearm just to keep myself grounded. But he knew as he put both arms around my waist and picked me off the ground without breaking the kiss.
I pulled away to catch my breath and he puts me down gently, resting his forehead against mine with his eyes closed. He whispered against my lips "Have mercy." I smiled at his man and he says "Four more days. Just four more days. And after that, if you feel like you need to go, I won't stop you. I'll wait for however long it takes. I promise. Just four more days."
I wanted that too.
I nodded my head and he smiled, kissing me again.
•••••