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"How about we make a checklist and get a little organized?" Ranboo suggested, even though he knew it would go unheard by the other two boys in the room, who was currently tearing apart the closet Ranboo had just organized this morning.
It had been nothing but chaos ever since Tommy came to their room, prepared for their 'sleepover.'
After waiting for a couple of minutes, hopeful for a response, Ranboo sighed. "Okay, I'll make a checklist."
His eyes widened as he watched Tubbo pull out a bottle of what he hoped was temporary brown hair dye.
"Woah- woah woah woah NO we are not..." he grabbed the hair dye bottle from Tubbo's hand. "We are not going to do something that could possibly be permanent."
"Fine then, why don't you help us?" Tommy frowned, sitting on Tubbo's bed with his arms crossed.
"Yeah, don't just stand there," Tubbo acknowledged, crossing his arms as well.
"That's-" Ranboo took a deep breath. "That's what I was trying to do."
"Well you were obviously doing a shit job," Tommy rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, Ranboo. You are shit. Shitboo."
Ranboo's eye twitched.
"Okay, as I was saying, we should maybe plan this out." He watched the two boys warily, surprised to see them actually listening.
"It's a formal event of course," Ranboo continued, after ensuring that they were paying attention. "And the people of the Antarctic Empire don't know how Tubbo and I look, so we don't need disguises."
"But Tommy does," Tubbo piped in. "Because he's a prince."
Ranboo sighed. "Excellent observation," he acknowledged, to which Tubbo beamed.
"So we're gonna have to put him in some extent of a disguise, especially because there is an entire bounty on him."
"But they think I'm dead, to be fair they could just think they are hallucinating," Tommy offered.
Ranboo looked at him skeptically. "And if they try to see if you aren't a hallucination and start a conversation with you?"
Tommy thought over it for a second. "That would suck."
"Exactly," Ranboo nodded slowly, as if he was talking to two five-year-olds.
He looked at the two thirteen-year-olds staring up at him.
He probably was talking to two five-year-olds.
"So what's your big idea Ranboo?" Tommy asked, raising an eyebrow.
What was his big idea?
"Well, you could just wear a hoodie," Ranboo tried, to which Tommy instantly shook his head.
"It's a formal event idiot. I can't just show up in a sweatshirt and sweatpants" Tommy rolled his eyes.
Tubbo's eyes suddenly lit up, and he jumped on the bed next to Tommy. "Can I straighten your hair?"
Tommy blinked.
"I mean, they might not recognize Prince Tommy without his curly hair," Ranboo added.
"And worst-case scenario, we dye your hair brown!!"
Tommy desperately turned to Ranboo, then to Tubbo, before sighing. "Alright, fine I guess."
It was silent in the room for a second before Ranboo spoke up.
"Where the heck are we getting a hair straightener from?"
Tubbo's mouth formed a perfect 'o' before he smiled. "I could try to make one! Worst case scenario we just set his hair on fir-"
"WHAT?"
Ranboo chuckled nervously. "Yeah you go do that Tubbo, Tommy don't worry I won't let it get to that point."
Tommy stared at Ranboo unsurely, and that's when Ranboo realized something else.
"Your eyes."
Tommy looked taken aback. "Pardon?"
"Your eyes, we have to disguise your eyes. Screw you and your really blue eyes. Why couldn't you just have really boring eyes like us?"
He could hear Tubbo shout protests from his workstation, where he hopefully was making a hair-straightener.
"Mr. Boo, I can't tell whether that was a compliment or an insult."
"That's not the point, what are we gonna do about your eyes? Where are we going to get access to eye-contacts without disturbing George, who if we ask, will most definitely tell Dream?"
Tubbo quite literally jumped from his chair and opened a drawer. He looked around a bit, before running up to the two, holding two clear contacts.
"I have a prototype, that I was gonna give George once I fixed them but look!"
Tommy squinted his eyes at the contacts, turning to Tubbo amused. "Ah yes, I'll wear clear contacts. That will definitely make my eyes less recognizable."
Tubbo looked at him like he was an idiot. "No, you dumbass, they change colors! Look!"
The two watched as Tubbo tinkered around with his phone, and both of their faces lit up when the contacts flashed from clear to white, then black, then green.
"Tubbo, my right-hand man" Tommy grinned, slinging an arm around Tubbo.
"They are still prototypes though, I haven't fully tested them yet. Worst case scenario we stab your ey-"
"Don't finish that sentence," Ranboo sighed.
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Tubbo's hair straightener worked, but at what cost?
He obviously didn't have time to make heat settings, and none of the three boys knew how hair straighteners worked, exactly.
So he built it with one setting.
"Pain"
When Tubbo was done quite literally torturing Tommy's hair, it looked straight.
Granted it also looked dead and completely and thoroughly burnt, even slightly ashy and not as bright as it used to be.
Though, he definitely made Tommy look like someone else.
And that really was their goal right?
"So? Did you... do it?" Tommy asked unsurely.
Both Ranboo and Tubbo stared at his hair, before staring at each other.
Ranboo let out a snort, and Tubbo broke into a fit of giggles.
"What the hell did you do to my hair?" Tommy growled, and Ranboo had to immediately cover his laugh.
"No no, you don't look bad per se. You just kinda..."
"You sorta look like Dream" Tubbo finished for Ranboo.
You could see the relief in Tommy's eyes.
"Well more like maybe... a 'bad hair day' Walmart version of Dream."
The relief slightly vanished. "Oi you pricks, you've done made me ugly now haven't you?"
"I mean... we could style it and hopefully fix it...?" Ranboo offered sheepishly.
"Forget about your hair for a second jeez," Tubbo rolled his eyes. "Try on the contacts!"
Tommy ran a hand through his hair, grimacing at the feeling. "I'm never forgiving you for this Ranboo."
"What? Why me? I didn't do anything?!"
"Yeah whatever, just give me the contacts Tubbo," Tommy muttered, holding his hands out.
After a couple minutes of fidgeting, and Tommy poking his eye out twice, the contacts were sort of properly in.
Good enough.
"Now for the magic," Tubbo smiled, playing around on his phone. He grinned with pride as Tommy's eyes changed colors.
"You are a god Tubbo" Tommy said, his eyes wide.
"So what color are we going for?" Tubbo asked.
"Pink" Ranboo answered, at the same time Tommy went "Blue!"
Ranboo and Tommy looked at each other.
"Are you an idiot? I do not want pink eyes Ranboo."
"Yeah? Well, the whole point of the contacts is to change your eye color, Tommy."
Tubbo shrugged. "I'll do purple, give both you fuckers what you want."
"As if anyone would believe purple is his real eye color, you can't be serious," Ranboo scoffed.
"AND PEOPLE WOULD BELIEVE PINK WAS?" Tommy shouted back at him.
"Yes."
"Okay jeez, what about brown Tommy?"
Tommy rolled his eyes. "I'd prefer purple."
"Purple it is."
"NO!"
"What? You just agreed?!"
Ranboo interrupted the two. "You... you idiots. Wilbur's coronation is in 2 hours. The walk to the kingdom is quite literally a good hour and a half away. Not to mention it's gonna be impossible to get out of here without getting caught."
"Not if I have anything to do with it."
Ranboo looked at Tubbo skeptically. "An invention? What, do you have like, invisible capes or something?"
"I have something better."
"What could you possibly have that could be better than invisible capes?"
Tubbo pulled out a pair of shoes with wheels.
Tommy raised an eyebrow. "Roller skates?"
"Not just roller skates. Roller skates with rocket boosters!!"
Tommy and Ranboo blinked.
Then their eyes went wide.
One with fear, and one with excitement.
"Tubbo I don't think that's gonna be the safest mode of transportation..." Tommy laughed nervously.
"I dunno dude, it looks fun," Ranboo shrugged.
"What... so we're gonna get dressed all fancy, then wear rollerskates? Thats not very professional..."
Tubbo's eyes widened. "We forgot to get dressed fancy."
"We can just wear our uniforms" Ranboo offered.
"But that's not dressing fancy!" Tommy whined.
"I'd like to think I look very fancy in my uniform." Tubbo retorted.
"Not Royal festival type fancy!"
"Suck it up."
Ranboo groaned and checked his watch.
"This is why we needed a checklist."
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