Reviewed by: FmEver
Book Title: Sirius-A collection of short stories
Author's Name: Flame_of_Frost
Cover: 7/10
The star (I guess that's Sirius) is hidden behind the title, and I don't like it. I also don't like that there are different colors for the "Sirius" and "a collection of short stories" part. I would remove the eyes and put the "Sirius" in its place.
Title: 7/10
I wonder why you chose the name "Sirius" because the first few stories didn't seem relevant. The cover and the title are nice together.
Blurb/Description: 9/10
I like your blurb a lot. It's interesting, short, and well written. I'm not an expert on blurbs of short stories (Mine is terrible) but I think that if I had to suggest a good blurb, I would name yours.
Creativity and originality: 7/10
Your stories are nice and enjoyable but I'd like to see more interesting first opening paragraphs. Your ideas are interesting but you need a shocking or unique opening to hook your readers.
Plot and Flow: 15/20
The main issue with the flow of the story is the repetitions of words and the fact that sometimes your paragraphs aren't connected. For example, in the third story, check this paragraph: "Sergei remembered...Sergei sneaked...Natalya had rented...He was half tempted...But deciding..." Also, I noticed that you have a specific structure with which you almost always start your sentences. It would be nice to have some variety. As for the plot, as I mentioned before, I like your ideas and especially the second story and the horror story were really good.
Character Development: 6/10
I could see a little bit of character development in the first chapter but since most of the stories are really short, I'm not sure how could you make any difference to your characters. However, I'd like you to create your characters with more details. For example, in the story with the thief and the gloves, we don't see enough of Sergei and Natalya to care for them and their story. I think creating more realistic characters, adding some facial expressions or/and body language (e.g. when the shower is broken) would really help create a better picture of the characters.
Writing style, Grammar, spellings, etc.: 7/10 I noticed a couple of mistakes. For example, in "Musings of a Centennial", in "Alas, the my new owner..." you don't need the "the".
And don't put a comma after an ellipsis (check the third story).
I didn't find any spelling mistakes and I like your writing style, though there are problems regarding the flow. There are also some repetitions and I suggest avoiding starting multiple paragraphs in a row with the same word.
The change of pov in story 3 was a little strange and confusing. I'm not sure why you chose it but when I first read the scene where the pov changes, I was very confused and I'm not sure if you need it. I would continue with the third-person pov.
Genre relevance: 10/10
It's an anthology of short stories and I wouldn't call it otherwise.
Reader enjoyment and Communication with the readers: 7/10 I enjoyed reading your stories despite the things that bothered me. You could interact more with your readers and especially those who comment. Sometimes a "thank you" or an emoji can show that you want to know your readers' opinions and genuinely care for them.
Overall: 68/100
The story "Outrunning Fears" was my favorite and probably the best-written story. I loved the ending! Improving the flow, changing the opening paragraphs, reading your stories aloud would improve your stories a lot. You are a good writer and your short stories were better than the other story I had reviewed some time ago.
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