"I'd prefer if you didn't come. You're still healing," Maggie says as she packs her bag.
"You know, dad used to say the same thing," I say, smiling with nostalgia.
She sighs, pausing her actions to look over to me.
"First, it was not going at all. Then, it became 'as long as you're behind me', then, it was me beside him.. The last time, when we went after Daryl- the day it happened. That was the first time he didn't say anything about me not going. He just let me get in the van," I remember.
Slowly, she takes a couple steps toward me.
"He knew I had to go," I say, almost reliving that moment Michonne, Rosita, Glenn, and I chased after Daryl.
Maggie nods, holding her arms out to me.
With only a single step, I'm in her arms and we hug each other tightly.
"This is for him. For us. And because it's for us, that means it's for him," she whispers.
"And then we have our future," I add.
"Exactly," Maggie agrees.
"Which is why you're the one that's gonna be behind me," I tell her.
She scoffs, but doesn't say anything as she pulls me tighter to her.
"I love you, mom. We're gonna be okay. The four of us," I say.
"Five.. Your dad, too," she adds.
"Him too," I nod.
She hesitates for a second before smiling softly, "Six of us."
"Six?" I ask, pulling back a bit to look at her.
"Carl too," she explains.
"Yeah?" I ask, smile growing on my lips.
"Of course," she grins.
At her words, and though I knew she accepted this long ago, I still felt grateful.
And as she smiles a bit more with a nod, I faintly hear Glenn's words of 'I'm glad it's him' in my head.
"Come here," she giggles, pulling me back into her as she kisses my head, "And for the record, I love you."
Laughing myself, I nuzzle further into her embrace.
We were still incomplete, though Maggie and I held each other with her baby bump hardly noticeable. Kate was outside helping the rest pack as Carl was spending time with Judith before we left. And of course, Glenn, Beth, Hershel weren't physically here.
But, with the sight of the war ending closer than ever and the optimism for our future- I felt a sense of security and comfort I hadn't felt in nearly two months now.
--
"Jade," a voice calls as we make our way through the field to the coordinates Dwight left on the map.
"King," I greet, spotting Ezekiel.
"Henry tells me that you spoke to him about his brother days ago. And weeks ago, Benjamin told me that he had spoken to you," he explains.
"I did. Henry's a good kid. And Benjamin was a good guy," I tell him, meaning each word.
"He is. And he was," he nods.
We continue walking, keeping the large group close together.
"Benjamin told me of your story. Your father's passing and how your mother is here. Now, I wish to have met your father as you and others speak so highly of him and I apologize for your loss. However, I have had the immense pleasure in meeting and working alongside your mother. She is a strong woman and I can very well see she's brought you up in her image."
Smiling at his words, I look to the ground.
I still wasn't completely over his whole persona. I still felt like Glenn was narrating each word he spoke as he did when I was thirteen from the many books I had.
"And just as Benjamin told you, I shall repeat. Your father, though his presence may be void, he's still by your side. And after this war has come to an end- he will still live alongside you," Ezekiel continues.
Surprised by just how much his words affected me, I nod.
"Thank you," I graciously say, grinning over to him, "Your Majesty."
"Your gratitude is mine. For your words to Henry and Benjamin- I thank you as well," he returns.
We trade a nod before he steps aside, moving to Carol's side.
"Speaking to royalty, huh?" Carl teases, quickening his steps to be by my side.
"Shut up," I scoff, nudging his arm with mine, "He's cool."
"He's definitely something," Carl nods.
"He's cooler than you," I tease.
"If you weren't injured, I'd make you sleep on the couch when we get back home."
"Home?" I ask.
"Alexandria. Home," he reminds.
"I haven't even thought that far," I admit.
After this, where would we all go? I guess I was growing accustomed to the Hilltop and being close to Maggie, I haven't given thought to going back to Alexandria where my things still were.
"Well, start thinking. Because after this, we're celebrating the end of the war," Carl says, placing his hand on my back.
"Candles and cheesy junk?" I ask.
"All that romance and shit," he confirms.
--
Upon arriving to the place marked on the map, we knew we were in the right place as whistling emerges from every side of us.
Panic floods through me, the sound all too familiar from the night of the lineup.
The sights flash in my head- a memory reel playing in my mind.
Daryl getting shot, the darkness of the van, the whistling from outside, Glenn's words of 'It's gonna be okay. It's gonna be okay.', the feeling of the gravel on my knees, Negan's speech, the feeling of Lucille on my hand- tearing me and Carl apart, the rhyme, Abraham, Daryl rushing forward, the promise of punishment..
Dad.. his head, the blood, his words I couldn't hear..
Negan centimeters away, speaking directly to me, his hand on my shoulder..
More hits to the man that raised me, Maggie's cries, the blood on my fingers..
"Well, damn, Rick.. Look at that," Negan's voice sounds from speakers- just like the night in Alexandria.
It snaps me out of my of the anxiety driven flashback. It's him. Negan.. The target. It's just about him.
"Pegged again. Pegged so very hard," he continues.
Raising my gun up, I jerk it into motion, ready to fire at the first thing I see. I place it on my left shoulder, avoiding my injured one. It was a handicap, but I couldn't be bothered as determination fuels me. I step to the side, keeping my promise to Maggie as I keep her behind me.
"I ambushed your ambush with an even bigger ambush," Negan amuses.
"How about you step out and face us?" Rick screams.
"Oh, I am everywhere, Rick," Negan reminds, "Some more bullhorns, more walkies.. Pick a direction to run. See how you do Make it fun for all of us!"
"Guess what else I did?" he challenges, "I brought you some of your old friends. You remember your old buddy Eugene? Well, he is the person that made today possible."
I spent months wondering what I felt to Eugene. Even after Terminus as his admittance to not being a scientist- not knowing the cure. But, it seemed as though it was betrayal after betrayal.. lie after lie with Eugene. I couldn't be bothered anymore, especially after Sasha.
"Same goes for Dwighty boy here. In case you're wondering, he didn't ream you on purpose. Nah, he is just a gutless nothing that sucks at life. And now, he gets to stand up here and watch you all die. And he's gonna live with that."
A mixture of relief and frustration hits. I was happy to know Dwight really was on our side the entire time, but the fact that he got caught.. And God only knows what he would do to Dwight after this is all over.
"And Gabriel.." Negan says and a cocks a gun by the radio, "Well, he's gotta go, too. We are cleaning house today, Rick. And then.. there's you. It never had to be a fight. You just had to accept how things are."
"But, don't get too upset on me, now," he laughs, "Not all of your people are gonna die today. I promise you that. See, I can't speak for the shit load of my people that just left out to fuck shit up at Hilltop.."
Hilltop.. Of course he would send more there. Tara was there- Judith was.. Enid, Gracie..
"But, not everyone here today is gonna die. See, I've got plans for people- I'm a guy that likes to plan ahead. So, let me give you a quick rundown on that, maybe those people drop their guns and head on over to my side instead of getting caught in the crossfire before inevitably ending up here anyway."
"For starters, I get my Daryl back. Maybe, I even put him and Dwighty in the same cell to keep each other warm at night," he names.
Out of the corner of my eye, I spot Daryl move a few steps up, clutching his gun tighter.
"And my lovebirds, of course!" he happily exclaims.
Carl sighs, already annoyed.
"Carl's gonna be my best front line solider! One day, my right hand man. And my favorite girl, Jade? Well, she's gonna be working side by side with my wives- tending to every little need they have. But, they'll be together. Isn't that better than losing one of if not both today?"
I glance to Carl, finding he was already looking at me.
It's you and me, Carl.. Just like day one..
If I die today, at least I was by your side..
Slowly, Carl nods, which I return. Without a single word vocal between us, we turn our attention forward, keeping both of our aims set.
"So, I'm gonna give my holy trinity, a holy trinity of their own! Three seconds to drop your guns and come to my side! Otherwise, you either die fighting the truth or you get caught or be put into your role forcibly, understand?"
"Three!" he shouts.
Carl's beside me..
"Two!"
Maggie is guarded behind Kate and I..
"One!"
And Glenn is always by my side..
In the distance, dozens upon dozens of Saviors stand, all their weapons pointed to our huddle of a group.
"You asked for it, assholes!" Negan screams.
The sound of guns exploding echoes, but no bullets come our way. Inspecting further, I notice the many Saviors ahead falling as the guns explode and ricochet against them, some dying instantly as others are left mutilated at their hands.
"Now!" Rick shouts, breaking into a run up the hill.
With the command, everyone sprints behind him.
It's an uphill battle, quite literally, before we make it up to the top. Still in front of Maggie, I fire relentlessly to the Saviors that dash toward us.
"He's running!" Maggie screams.
Following her sight, I spot Negan dodging between vehicles in an attempt to get away.
"Jade, go!" she shouts again.
"Go?" I yell back, keeping guard over her.
"Rick's going alone, Carl followed!" Kate calls over the gunfire.
"It's for Glenn! Go! Help them end it!" Maggie cries.
I look back to her for a split second, catching the desperation in her eyes.
"It's just about him!" she reminds, "Help them!"
She nods once, firing behind me to another Savior before shouting once more, "Go!"
At the demand, I break from the group, following the way I saw Negan go to begin with. Dashing down the hill, I spot Carl's back, picking up pace. Further beyond him, I see Rick and Negan by a tree as Negan tackles Rick to the ground.
I freeze in my tracks, holding my gun up to fire but see there's no clear shot. If I took the shot, I would risk hitting Rick. Instead, I begin running again down the hill again.
Carl charges, bashing his shoulder into Negan and sending all three spiraling. Negan makes it to his knees first, grabbing Rick around the throat in a choke hold as I raise my gun to him.
"Well.. isn't this interesting?" Negan asks, "I did say to make it fun."
Carl holds his hand up cautiously to Negan as he holds Rick close to him.
"Let him go," I demand, voice surprisingly stern.
"Baby girl.. You should know better than anyone that when I am speaking, you do not interrupt. I already had to kill daddy, do you really want me killing daddy-in-law, too?" he asks, making it to his feet with Rick still in his grasp.
"And just so you know.. 'eenie, minne, miney, moe'? That was bullshit. I already made my choice when I saw you all," he says.
I knew it.. Of course I knew it.. I caught on when he was midway through it.
And yet, his words- the confirmation coming from the man himself, sends a burning heat through my chest, rage making my hands clutch my gun tighter.
"Let him go," I repeat.
He begins to bend over, the action causing me to take a step closer. As I do so, he points at me, the action making me stop.
"Careful how you're pointing that thing, baby girl," he warns, "I wanna kill daddy-in-law, I really do. I'd hate for you to do that on incident. But, it would make my job a hell of a lot easier."
He finally reaches enough to grab Lucille, the item only angering me more.
"Hows about I take out Ricky here with the same thing I bashed your daddy's brains out with?" Negan growls.
Snapping, I fire the gun, the words sending me over the edge.
The bullet goes into his shoulder. Enough to break his hold on Rick.
Rick lurches forward, snapping Negan's arm over his own shoulder. As he turns, Negan swings Lucille to him with a anguished shout. Rick jumps backward, but Lucille still hits his side, sending him to the ground. I fire again to Negan as he's on the ground, but he rolls out of the way.
Carl reaches for him, fighting to pin the bigger man to the ground. as Negan exclaims, "Shit, son!"
Considering the sheer size difference Carl's attempt was admirable. Carl holds him for a second until Negan's hand reaches up to him, ripping his bandage off and pushing his thumb against his wound. Carl cries out and as his grip lessens, Negan uses his other hand to throw a punch to him.
With Carl out of the way, I rush forward again with my gun.
"Goddammit, baby girl!" he yells, rolling back to his knees.
Just as I fire the gun, he swings Lucille to me, which I jump back away from. The gun fires into the glass plate that hung in the tree, sending glass everywhere.
"I told you, I didn't want to kill you two!" Negan bellows, swinging Lucille once more.
He makes it to his feet, still swinging the bat wildly as I continue trying to dodge and get an aim on him. After seconds, the barbed wire hits my hands, cutting the back of my hand open as the gun flies out of my grasp.
"And I don't want to kill women, either!" Negan shouts, "But, for fucks sake, Jade. You're just as willing to jump as your daddy was!"
Defenseless, Lucille's incoming strike to me seems inevitable.
"No!" Carl shouts.
I heard him before I saw, or felt him, as he suddenly races over. With both arms around me, he throws both of us to the ground away from Negan. We roll a few times, but are out of harms way for the moment.
"Shit, Carl!" Negan cries out, frustration in his voice.
Just as he takes a step toward us, Rick jumps to his feet. With a angry roar, his fist swipes in one quick motion against Negan's throat.
Negan's actions come to an abrupt stop, falling to his knees as he grasps at his neck where blood began to pour- a shard of the stained glass I'd shattered.
"Rick," he gurgles out, "Look what you did.."
Unable to hold himself up, he falls to the ground as more and more blood spews from his neck.
Chest heaving, I pull my own hand to my chest where blood also came from- the deep scratches from Lucille clearing doing it's damage.
Rick turns, spotting where the others were coming from. Hilltop, Alexandria, Kingdom, and even a number of Saviors made their way down the hill to inspect the situation. Once I spot Maggie, I glance back to where Negan was still breathing- though the breaths were shallow.
It's over.. He's seconds away from bleeding out..
It's done..
"Save him," Rick says, motioning Siddiq over.
Save.. Save him?
"No!" Maggie immediately shouts.
She begins marching forward only for Michonne to grab her as she called her name, "Maggie! Maggie!"
"No, he can't! No!" Maggie cries, fighting against Michonne's hold.
"You can't save him!" Kate screams, also taking steps forward before Dianne grabs her just as Michonne held Maggie back.
Save him? Save..
The words echo in my head, leaving me feeling disassociated from my own body.
"Save," I repeat the word quietly, looking to where Siddiq was making his way to Negan's side.
"He killed Glenn!" Maggie wails.
The reminder sends me back to the present at once.
"Rick! You can't.. You can't," I protest, voice breaking as it feels weaker than ever.
"We have to," Rick says.
"We have to end it!" Maggie screams, still being held by Michonne.
"This is ending it. This is how we do that," Rick argues.
"It ends when he's dead!" I shout, pulling myself up to my knees.
"It's just him!" Kate shouts, "Nobody else, just him! He killed Glenn, Rick!"
He killed Glenn.. Siddiq is minutes away from saving the man that killed Glenn..
A whimper leaves my throat before a full cry does as I crawl toward where Siddiq was cleaning Negan's wound.
"Jade.. Jade!" Rick shouts.
"He can't.. He can't live," I mutter.
As I make it to Siddiq's side, I shove him off Negan. As he's off, the blood returns to pouring.
Just a little longer..
Siddiq picks himself back up, attempting to block me.
"Don't!" I scream, shoving Siddiq once more.
Just let the blood go a little longer..
Just like Donnie back at that warehouse- Negan just has to lose a little more blood and-
"Jade!" Rick shouts, his footsteps getting closer to me.
Just a few more seconds..
"Jade!" Rick calls, his arms wrapping around me and jerking me off the ground, away from Negan as Siddiq jumps back to work.
"No! No! You can't!" I cry, my chest heaving.
Maggie's cries grow louder, repeating, "No! No!"
"Siddiq, stop! You can't save him! he- he killed," I sob, "He killed my dad! Please, stop!"
Rick pulls me back further, my feet dragging on the ground as I try to cement my spot.
"Let go! Let go!" I demand, hands pushing and slapping at Rick's arms around me.
"Rick!" Maggie cries, Michonne bringing her to the ground to hold her close.
"Let go! Let- let go," I cry, fight in me going weaker as heavier cries escape my chest.
When I'm far enough away, closer to the group, Rick lets go and I crumble to the ground.
The grass on my legs in my kneeling position, the unstoppable sobs retching from my mouth.
It was the lineup all over again..
I fall forward as Rick makes his way back to Negan, still trying my best to crawl after him.
Not like this.. He killed Glenn.. How could he save him?
I make it a foot away before Carl is kneeling beside me, pulling my broken figure into his lap and hiding my face in his chest as he holds me.
Rick begins speaking, telling everyone how everyone will go home and move on.
Move on? How can I live knowing Negan is still alive?
I don't hear everything, feeling Carl's hands ease to my head, covering my ears to block out Rick's words.
--
Brutally, I shove the remaining items of mine in a bag, ignoring the tears that were constantly streaming down my face.
I kick over the desk that was hardly standing. As it falls, a cloud of ashes flows through the air on impact from the floor as it breaks into even more pieces.
I scoff, waving my hands to settle the dust around my face. Trailing my foot through the ashes, I see there's no saving anything that was once in the desk. Standing back up, I move to the nightstand. It's bulky nature saved a few things inside, but not much.
Sighing, I reach my hand to the book that laid among the ash.
Dale's bible would have been unrecognizable to anyone else that wasn't me..
The edges of the book were singed, the cover unreadable. Flipping through it, some of the pages even fall out while others were crumbled and destroyed by the fire.
One of the things that fell out was my picture from Woodbury. Where our faces once were, it was melted. Only a mess of colors from the print as the edges were burnt off. It was gone.
Merle, Brian, Paul, Karen, and Martinez were in that photo.. All of them were gone. And now, even the photo was gone.
"You shouldn't be in here alone," Rick's voice sounds from the doorway.
My jaw ticks and I shove the remains of the book in my bag, ignoring his presence.
"This place was bombed, Jade. The walls could collapse and we can't risk you getting stuck in here or getting hurt because of it," he says.
"I was in here when the bomb went off to begin with. I think I can handle it now," I say, my colder than I'd ever spoken to him with.
He sighs and I could feel his eyes on the back of my head.
"I get you're upset-"
"Yeah, no shit," I snap, turning on my heels to look at him.
His eyes soften, seeing my state. Though my eyes were hard and void to him, the tears still flowed.
"You don't understand it now but in the future-"
"No!" I shout, jumping to my feet, "You don't get it, Rick!"
He brings his hand u, pinching the bridge of his nose, "Jade-"
I stomp to him, staring up at him with a glare.
"You're the one that doesn't understand!" I yell, pointing my finger into his chest, "You've never went through this. You've never had this pain that me, Kate, and my mom are feeling!"
"I know what you're-"
"You don't! Lori chose her fate. Jessie was taken by walkers. Michonne, Carl, and Judith are still here! You've never had someone taken from you like we have! Beth was murdered, Hershel was murdered, and my dad was murdered! Not by walkers or natural causes. Murdered, Rick!" I scream, voice raw from emotion and the constant crying.
He frowns, not sure if he wanted to argue or comfort me.
"Mine is always taken, Rick," I state, voice going calmer, "You know that better than anyone."
At my words, he shakes his head with a pleading look.
"If this is about Shane-"
"Who gives a shit about Shane?" I hiss, "Unless you want to admit that you've never been the one being taken from. You're the one taking."
"That's not.. Jade," he sighs.
"You've never had someone taken like I have. Like my family has. I know you cared for them, too- I do. But, it's different, Rick."
Heaving a breath, I shake my head, fighting to get the words out. Of course, after years of knowing Rick, we had our up and downs. Seeing as we were in each others lives for so long, I never hesitated to tell him when he screwed up. Like I told Carl, to others, he was the leader they feared to cross. To me, he's still the man I've known my entire life.
"He may have been the man that saved you at the start. But, to me, that was the man that raised me since the start- even before you came back. That was the man that busted his ass to take care of me when I felt like I had no one in this hellhole of a world. He was my dad, not my friend. And he's dead and you saved the man that killed him," I cry.
"And I can't even try to explain to you what that's like because you've never felt it! I can't ask you how you would feel if someone protected the person that killed Lori, because no one did! You don't know what it's like."
He breaks his eyes away, looking to the wall instead of me, a rough swallow as he keeps his bearings.
"You saved the man that killed my father. You took that from us," I say, voice quieter in hopes of getting my point across.
In the distance, frantic footsteps make their way to the room.
"Rick?" Michonne asks as she and Carl emerge from the hall.
I glance to Michonne, then back to Rick. He follows my eyes, still a gloomy swirl in his features.
"You don't know what it's like. And I pray that you never will," I tell him.
Turning my back, I pick my bag up from the ground, throwing it around my shoulder.
"You could stay," Michonne offers, her voice gentle and hesitant.
"With that asshole here?" I ask incredulously.
She frowns, already knowing my answer before I said it.
"I'm going to Hilltop. And not coming back," I say, looking back to Rick, "Not today, not tomorrow, right?"
His eyebrows knit together and for the first time in my life, I couldn't read what was going on in his head.
I push past Rick, making my way outside.
Kate and Maggie didn't want to come back at all, so I had already been to their rooms in an attempt to save what I could. That was already packed in bags in the car Aaron was going to take me back in. My room was the last I had to go through, meaning I was ready to leave.
"Jade, wait!" Carl calls, the one thing that could make me stop.
He sets his hand on my shoulder from behind, the touch only bringing more tears.
"Give me ten minutes to get my stuff. I'll meet you by the car," he says.
Surprised, I turn to look at him. He nods, rubbing my shoulder in comfort.
"Carl-" Rick tries to argue.
"It's not your call," Carl says, turning back to him.
"You don't have to," Michonne attempts.
"I talked to Earl from Hilltop before we left. I was worried about something like this and he already told me that if I wanted to stay at Hilltop, he'd give me a job working under him," Carl explains.
"Carl.." I breathe out.
He gives a soft smile to ease my worries.
"Go wait out by the car," he motions, "Just give me time to get my stuff and say bye to Judith."
He turns back to Rick, further explaining.
"I'll visit. I'm not just up and disappearing. But, I do need to do this," he says, tone serious and determined.
Slowly, I take a single step back, watching the look in Rick's eyes as he looks to Carl. When he looks to me, I feel the ashamed look grow on my face before fully walking away.
--
so this was a rollercoaster
im giving carl his comic job what about it scott pimple shouldn't have screwed with the og chandler deserves better
❤❤