It was only an hour or so after Carl left that the gates were opened again. This time, letting people in.
"Jade!" Kate cheers, throwing her arms around me.
I didn't have the energy for excitement, I only felt relief.
"How's it hanging?" Tara asks, moving in to hug me as well.
"Where's Heath?" Eric asks, closing the gates back.
Tara sighs, her face turning a bit gloomy.
"He's alive," Kate answers quickly, "We know that much."
"Things got crazy out there, I'm happy to see all is right here," Tara says.
"What happened?" Eric asks as I ignore the sting of Tara's comment.
"We were all separated. I made it back to where we lost each other and the camper was gone- Heath had the keys. We thought he'd be back here by now," Tara explains.
"We haven't seen any sign of him," I say, confusion hitting me.
"Maybe he found something," Kate offers, "I'm sure he'll be back sooner or later."
"Yeah," Tara agrees, "Me and Kate found each other after that. We ran up on each other in town."
"Her crazy ass held a spear to me! Seriously, look at this thing!" Kate says, grabbing Tara's hand and holding it up to show the stick-like weapon.
Tara nervously laughs, "Yeah, my bad."
Kate shakes her head, though her smile doesn't drop.
"You seem to be in a good mood," I note, feeling queasy knowing I was about to ruin it.
"You were right. You and Maggie both.. Being out there felt good," she says, "And even though it was scary, being on my own for awhile felt good, too. Having time to think and clear my head.. I needed it."
I look to Eric who looked back to me with the same look- reluctance.
"But, I'm glad to be back. Where's Maggie? I wanna see if the baby bump is bigger," she smiles.
"Is Denise at home? I'll catch up later," Tara says, beginning to walk away.
"Wait," I jump, grabbing her arm.
She stops, taking off her neon sunglasses.
"What's up?" she asks.
I look back to Eric for help. He nods encouragingly, taking a single step back.
"We should talk," I say, "Things aren't as right as they seem."
"Is everyone all right? What happened?" Kate asks, concern taking over her voice as her smile fades.
I release Tara's arm, inhaling deeply to give myself strength.
"That place- it was just an outpost. There's more Saviors," I begin.
"What? How many? How do we know?" Tara asks.
"Daryl, Rosita, and Denise were on a run.. Abraham and Eugene, too.. That guy that Daryl saw before- Dwight.. he was back He had others with him," I say, knowing good and well I was about to break everything between Tara and Kate.
"He uh," I clear my throat, "He shot Denise. Attacked the others. Eugene was shot, too. But, he's fine."
"He- he shot-" Tara pauses, hands coming up to her head, "She's okay? They're both okay?"
"Denise didn't make it. He did it when they didn't even know he was there," Eric steps in, causing me to give him a grateful look.
"He blindsided them?!" Tara snaps and Kate rushes to place comforting hands on her back and arm.
"Everyone kept it low after that. But, Daryl took off to find him. So, a few of us followed," I continue, "Maggie got sick, so some others were gonna take her to Hilltop."
Kate's eyes widen and I could feel that goddamn lump in my throat again.
"They were caught," Eric says, recalling what Aaron told him, "They had traps on each road on the way there. They set them up."
"And we- Daryl, Michonne, Rosita, dad, and I," I say, looking to the ground so I didn't have to endure the eye contact, "Dwight found us. Shot Daryl in the shoulder- but he's fine. Last time I saw him, he was fine."
"Last time you saw him?" Kate repeats.
"They got us all together. Negan-" I breathe, his name alone making me sick, "Negan wasn't in that outpost. He was there. Him and about a hundred other Saviors."
"Shit," Kate hisses, looking around at a loss.
"He," I pause, swallowing.
Breathe, Jade..
"He put us in a lineup.." I trail off, looking up to the sky and forcing the tears away.
I can't say it..
"Jade?" Kate questions and I don't have it in me to look at her.
I remember what Carl said yesterday. They had no idea about any of this, it needed to come from someone close. Someone who loves them and cares about how they'll feel after they find out.
I force myself to regain control, breathing deeply for a second or so.
I look back to them, stepping closer.
"He killed Abraham," I say then look to Kate, "Then dad."
"Oh my god," Tara gasps.
Kate's head shakes, denial setting in.
"In front of us all. Then, he took Rick somewhere else. When they came back, he threatened Carl. Nearly made Rick cut Carl's hand off. Rick broke and Negan got what he wanted," I say, feeling myself shut down as I say the words.
We all knew what happened- I didn't need to talk about the events until now. Speaking the reality of that night made me feel like I was reliving it in a cruel way.
"They're making us provide for them. For Negan. We do anything out of line, he'll kill someone- if not everyone," I explain.
"They were just here a few days ago," Eric speaks up once more, "Rampaged through everything. Took all the medicine, everyone's beds, furniture.."
"They'll be back again soon. Rick and Aaron left out the other day to find more stuff for them," I say.
"And Maggie? You said she was sick, where is she? Is she okay?" Kate rambles.
"She's fine. She's at Hilltop with Doctor Carson. Carl went this morning to see her," I say.
"Why didn't you go?" Tara asks, her voice empty and raw. I could tell she was barely keeping herself together.
"Because I knew you two were coming back. And I'm kind of.. the only.. you know.." I trail off, glancing to Tara.
"The only one with medical knowledge," she says and I could almost hear the cries in her throat.
I stay quiet, not sure how else I could say anything else.
"I'm gonna go home," Tara says, not looking to any of us.
"Tara," I sigh, stepping to her.
"I just need some time," she says, not looking back as she makes her way to the medical house she and Denise shared.
I frown as I watch her walk away before turning my attention back to Kate. Of course, I regret it as soon as I do so.
"Glenn.. he's really.." she says through stuttered breaths.
I nod, biting my inner cheek in a way to force my emotions down.
Her shoulders begin to shake and within seconds, the tears are escaping her eyes. I step to her, wrapping my arms around her. She doesn't have any strength as she keeps her arms by her side. She rests her head on my shoulder, her tears quickly soaking my shirt.
--
"Thank you, Olivia," I say as I take Judith from her. Her little arms wrap around my neck, nuzzling her face in my neck.
"Anytime," she smiles, rubbing her back, "She's too precious for me not to take every now and then."
"She is," I agree, resting my head on hers.
"How'd they take it? Are they at least semi-okay?" Olivia wonders.
"As much as you would expect," I say, "They both went home to rest and think about things. Think they just need a bit of time."
Judith whimpers, her hand clenching my shirt a bit.
"You should let her get some rest, I'll get out of your hair," Oliva says.
"Actually, I was going to ask if you wanted to stay for dinner," I offer, "I know Tara and Kate won't have enough sense to make themselves any food, I was gonna make enough for them, me, and Carl once he gets back."
"That would be great," she smiles.
"I'll just put her down real quick," I say, excusing myself as I walk out the room.
Once we make it to her room, Judith sighs to herself.
"What? What's on your mind?" I ask her.
She's said a few words now- enough to get her wants and needs out even though it may just be one singular word at a time.
"Carl," she pouts.
I laugh a little, hugging her closer.
"Carl will be back soon. Okay?" I ask her and she hums pitifully.
"He's just doing me and your.." I pause, "What is she to you? What are you gonna call her when you get old enough? She's my mom.. and Carl and I.."
My face turns red and I quickly shake the thoughts out of my head.
"We'll just settle for Aunt Maggie for now, okay?" I say.
As I try to set her down, she whines, clinging to me more.
"Okay, I get it," I sigh, walking around the room and bouncing her a little.
After a few minutes, I hear the front door open and then close again from downstairs.
"Hmm?" I hum, moving to the window to look down.
Did Olivia leave? Did Kate come here? I'd told her this is where I would be so maybe-
My movements stop once I hear whistling. Getting a hold of myself, I sigh and force the thoughts out of my head. It's just whistling. I can't let a normal thing become a trigger to think about him.
"Great, great, great, great, great, great!" Negan's voice sounds through the air as he exclaims.
Not great..
His voice becomes muffled as he speaks to Olivia.
Olivia..
She had a close call last time he was here, she must be terrified to be facing him alone.
"Here," I whisper, placing Judith in her bed.
She whimpers a little and I quickly shush her.
"I'm gonna be right back, just be a good girl, yeah? I'll be right back," I carefully say to her.
She pouts and the sight alone breaks my heart.
"I'll be right back," I promise, patting her head before rushing out the door.
Just as I make it to the steps, I catch sight of Olivia's tear stained face before she draws back and slaps Negan.
Or she's totally fine and can handle herself..
I take another step only to then spot Carl standing behind Negan. As if sensing my presence, Carl turns, his eye widening as he sees me. His bandage was off, his wound showing clear through his hair. He looks to Negan who was moving in to whisper close to Olivia then back to me. I hold my hand out as if to ask 'what do I do?' and he nods his head for me to go back upstairs.
"All right well, I'm just gonna put my feet up and wait for my stuff to get here," Negan decides.
I ease back up the steps as Negan smiles to Olivia.
"Olivia, would you be a lamb and make us a little lemonade? Now, I know I left you all some of that good powdered stuff," Negan requests, his voice growing fainter and fainter as I ascend back up the stairs and back to Judith's room.
Once back inside, Judith whimpers, her hands reaching to me. I shush her, rushing to her side and setting my hand on her back to ease her a bit.
I stayed there, listening as Negan begins trailing through the house and making side comments to Carl every now and then. Panic sets in as I hear their footsteps getting closer to Judith's room.
"How about this one?" Negan asks, his voice directly in front of the door.
"Oh, i-it's just a water heater," Carl lies on the spot.
"Seriously?" Negan asks, the door knob turning, "Come on, man."
With no other options, I place my back against Judith's bed, keeping her behind me just as the door opens.
"Baby girl!" Negan exclaims, a wide smile on his face.
I stay quiet, hand clutching the wood of the bed.
"Don't tell me," he points, "You were getting ready to surprise Carl here with a little fun time?"
Annoyance fills me as he chuckles.
"Well, considering what your boy just did, I don't think he deserves for you to put out just yet," he says.
What he just did?
"Oh, of course you wouldn't know. Unlike Carl, you get it," he sighs, "Well, I'll let him explain it to you later, I was just-"
He cuts himself off, leaning backwards as he peers behind me. Protectively, I step to the side he was going, guarding Judith to the best of my ability. As I do so, he looks to my eyes with a glare. He straightens himself out, taking slow steps toward me. As he makes it just a centimeter away, he looks down at me.
"Step aside," he lowly says, a curious gleam in his eyes.
Swallowing, I look over to Carl who held a defeated look on his face.
"Baby girl," Negan calls my attention back before repeating, "Step aside."
I look to my feet, slowly stepping to the right.
"Oh, my," Negan inspects, holding his arm out to Carl who begrudgingly takes Lucille, "Look at this little angel."
I couldn't look, only catching the sight out of the corner of my eye. Negan chuckles, reaching in to pick Judith up, holding her in his arms.
"Goodness," he awes.
He stood between Carl and I, so even as I tried to look over to Carl, I was met with Negan.
"Baby girl," he calls again, "I might have just found a new favorite."
I scowl at him, wanting nothing more than for him to put Judith back.
"Don't get jealous now," he grins at the sour look on my face, "You've still got a spot in my heart. A very special one."
I shake my head, looking away from him.
After a few minutes of cooing over Judith, he turns back to me.
"Say, baby girl, why don't you go down to the ole market and fetch us some dinner?" he asks.
"What?" I spit out.
"Come on!" he urges, "You, me, Carl, and this princess here can have ourselves a family dinner. Even Olivia can come once she finishes. Olivia's getting our drinks, you can get our meal. How's that sound?"
I look to Carl who sighs, just as fed up as I was.
"I'm here until Rick is here," Negan says, "Might as well make the best of our time together until the stink eye comes back."
I turn my eyes back to him, being met by that same damned smile he always carries.
"And you know how we do that?" he asks.
"How?" I ask monotonously.
"With spaghetti, of course!"
--
❤❤