April 5. 2020
"Harry!" I yell out from the living room, pacing around slowly. I have had contractions all day. They started with mild back pains and had gradually increased and turned sporadic, they had been spread out but now they seem to be more frequent and much more painful. Kitty has been very close to me today. He really hasn't left my side. Even now as I walk he is basically in my legs making me trip a bit over him.
I continue to walk around doing all that, that Allison girl said to do in class. I start humming a random tune to distract myself. Harry had just gotten in the shower so he probably can't hear me, instead of opening the window he uses the fan so it is loud and obstructs all hearing.
As I keep walking I feel myself leak. "Did I just pee myself?" I ask aloud in awe of the fact that I literally just peed myself. Then I feel and hear a small pop. A large rush of liquid runs down my leg. Holy fucking shit. No no no no.
"Harry!" I scream out kinda in shock not being able to move. I can feel my body start to shake a bit. Am I going into labor? No I'm not. I can't? This is too early. Way too early.
I keep getting large waves on contractions. My uterus feel like there is brick pressed on top of it and it is being drilled with a jack hammer
I am only 3 days early but still, she is due on the 8th, not now. We can't do this now. I'm not ready.
Maybe it's false labor. That happens, right? Like a pre-water break? Lord I hope there is?
"Harry!" Harry now turns round the corner fast walking into the living room with a towel hanging low on his waist, "What? What's wrong? Are you okay?" He ask frantically grabbing my shaken hands.
"I think my water broke." His eyes widen and his pupils dilate into nothing. "It broke? Are you sure?" His hands begin to shake as well now. We are a mess.
"I think? Maybe? It popped."
"What do you mean maybe? What popped?"
"My vagina popped!" A large pain hits again making my groan just a bit.
"Oh shit. Okay. This is happening now." He guides me to the coach and helps me sit. "Okay you stay right here, let me uh, let me go get dressed, uhm I'll grab your bag, I'll grab the baby bag, the seat, let me get the seat, wallet. Where is my wallet? And keys. Good fuck we need to me more organized!" He rambled aloud to me while running around like a chicken with its head cut off trying to grab all the items we need.
He comes back from the back room with my purse, the baby bag, and the car seat in his arms. The keys matched in his pinky finger and his wallet in his mouth. "Hold on, let me put this in." He says with his mouth muttered as he runs out the door. He comes straight back in and gets me and leads me out the door. "Kitty. What are we going do about him?" I ask as he shuffles me into the car and helps me in the Jeep. All our stuff was just thrown into the back. He seems more spastic than me.
"I'll call Mitch, he has a key." He says closing my door and running to the other side. He quickly pulls out of the driveway. Harry then pulled out his phone quickly so he could call Mitch.
"Hey man, can you come by and check in Kitty later? Jules is in labor. Yeah. Got to go. Kay. Bye."
He lazily tosses his phone into the cup holder and reaches out so I can hold his hand. "How are you feeling? You okay?" I squeeze his hand every time a wave comes through.
"In pain, lots of pain, lots of it." He steps on the gas a little more so we can get to the hospital. "Why is there so much fucking traffic?" Harry ask aloud letting his anger get the best of him as he hits the steering wheel with the palm of his hand. Traffic is stop and go right now. I'd probably be getting annoyed too but the pain is swarming my mind.
I lean my head back and close my eyes. "It's okay, we are almost there, it's okay." He says affirmingly over and over again.
We finally pull into the hospital and Harry pulls into the ER parking lot me. He hops out first and goes in the back seat to grab both the bags. Then he goes to the front passenger to get me out slowly. This is hell.
He supports my weight in his arms as we slowly walk to the doors. A nurse runs out with a wheelchair and ushes me to sit. He hands it over to Harry and tells us to follow him. He quickly guides us through the hallways and all the way to the pregnancy center. Harry keeps one hand on the handle bar guiding me and one hand on my shoulder so I can lay and rest my head on his arm. He is so comforting.
We finally get into a room. The nurse and Harry help me get into bed. He begins taking vitals and having me remove my pants so he can check to see if A.) my water actually broke and it wasn't something else and B.) to measure my contractions.
He said that I was about 4 centimeters dilated and he is going to bring me into a different room, the delivery room, and get me set up. He said he needed to get a doctor so we can start but first he had to set me up with everything.
Now the nurse and Harry help me strip out of my clothing and into a hospital gown. He puts in an IV in my arm and explain he'll be back shortly before leaving.
Now we are all alone in the actual delivery room, fear overtakes me once more as the adrenaline of getting here runs off. "Harry," I whimper out while holding his hand still, "I'm scared." This room is much better than the first one we were in. This one has pretty wallpaper and there is even a big comfortable couch and chair so Harry can sit.
"I know you are, I know." He stands and wraps his arms around my head and pulling my into his chest. "I'm right here, I'll be here the whole time, I won't leave your side once." He pets my back and kisses my head. He just stands there holding me and continuously just telling me it is all going to be okay.
The doctor comes in with 3 nurses following her. "Hello I am Doctor Shay, I will be helping you deliver this baby." She says shortly while reading a clipboard. Doctor Shay helps Juliette get situated for her knees are bent up so she can have the perfect view and access for delivering baby Madeline.
"Okay so you want the epidural right?" Doctor Shay ask rusting around. "Yes please." Juliette says shaking her head feeling the burning pain.
"Alright I will be back and in the meantime an Anesthesiologist will come in and get you situated." Doctor Shay walked out and all the nurses followed.
Before the anesthesiologist could come in, the original male nurse comes with a plastic cup full of ice chips. "I know you didn't ask but many women love these during this time." He hands Harry the ice and a chilled water bottle, he accepts and graciously thanks him.
"Are you okay baby?" Harry ask her pushing her hair out of my face. "I'm okay, just hurting, I want the ice chips. Can I have them?" Harry nods and helps feel her with the small plastic spoon.
Juliette continues feeling these sickening waves in her stomach. "Harry, I think I am going to throw up." Thinking quick on his feet he grabs a large pink throw-up bowl sitting beside him. He sets in front of Juliette and she begins to heave in it. Harrys heart is breaking watching the love of his life hurt like this. He almost got sick himself.
He rubs her back telling her it's okay. Her throat is now burning from the acid heat. How am I supposed to do this? She thinks to herself as she finishes up. I'm not strong enough to deliver a full human. "I'm gonna get a nurse." Harry says leaving her alone. Now the only thing she can think about is how luck she is to have Harry. He drives her insane most days
He comes back in with the same nurse they had continuously had. "Okay this is normal, let me take this for you, are you drinking water? You need to stay hydrated." He says taking the bowl of throw up to set it on the other side of the room as he adjust her IV. Once he finishes helping Juliette re-settle, he takes the bowl and leaves again.
Harry and Juliette kept a steady conversation flowing while waiting for anesthesiologist. They are both trying to distract themselves, the waiting is nauseating. She finally comes in and sets Juliette up on her side. She placed a needle in the small part in her back, pushing the tube in. Her face is laced with discomfort making Harry feel pain for her. Once this is done Juliette can lay back on her back and relax while the pain medication kicks in.
She closes her eyes as Harry still rest squeezing her hand. He calls Betty to let her know what is happening. It is only 5 at night so she is still up and awake. He tells her not to come to the hospital yet and that he will call her with updates. Juliette and Harry had previously decided they wanted to be in the postpartum room before anyone visits. Betty was so excited. She almost jumped up and down before she remembered she might break a hip. This is like her own great-grand baby.
Juliette and Harry alike both feel like the doctor will never come in. As her contractions grow worst the pain becomes unbearable.
After maybe 20 minutes of her body falling under the medications spell, Doctor Shay had arrived back into the room.
She has been coming in hour after hour after hour seeing if we are in the right place to start actually pushing. This had been going on for over four hours. Four excruciatingly painful and long hours.
"Alright Mrs. Styles, let's get started again." Doctor Shay says as she lifts Juliettes gown and starts looking. "Well, we seem to be 10 centimeters now, are you ready?"
"No." Juliette says frantically making the doctor give a small smile. "Mr. Styles, would you want to get up there with your wife, help her out maybe?"
Harry jumps at the offer and tucks himself right in behind his wife. He holds her shoulders and guides her with her breathing. Helping her take deep breaths so she can push and be concentrated. Occasionally he would give her hard massages to relax her, this happened only until she grabs his hand so she has something to hold.
"Okay Juliette, I need you to give me a push okay? Can you push for me?" Juliette does with all of her might. She squeezes Harrys hands as tight as she can.
They get into a pattern of pushing three time with all her will strength and then resting for a moment. Every push made Juliette curse strings of profanities and yelling. It's like shoving a bowling ball through a key hole.
Harry feels useless trying to help her. He can't push the baby for her, he can't take the pain away, he can't do anything to help her. Juliette feels weak and beginning to feel herself not be able to push. Her whole body is tense and stressed. She feels bad for squeezing Harrys so hard, she bets that his hand is going to be broken by the time the baby is here.
For two hours they had been at this. Just constant pushing and pushing. Juliette is crying at this point making Harrys heart squeeze up and shrivel.
"Okay Juliette, I need you to push with everything you got left, I know it's hard, I know it is, but we are almost there, she is crowning. Once her head is out the rest will be better."
"1... 2... push!"
Juliette pushes, screaming as her daughters head comes through. After another two pushes Madeline is out and her cries fill the room making Juliette fall back onto Harry. She looks up to his and they both smile as he nuzzled his face in her.
The baby's umbilical cord is cut and she is taken to the side of the room to be cleaned. Juliette has to push some more to now deliver her placenta. But Harrys and Juliettes gaze is focused now on where their baby currently is. Once realizing she need to deliver this too, she takes two large pushes and the placenta slides out.
Now she cant finally relax.
They had declined to keeping it and Madeline was brought to them, she was all cleaned up and ready for her mommy and daddy. Juliette held out shaken arms while taking her baby girl and bringing her to her chest. Her arms cradle her and Harrys arms wrap around Juliette so his hands could rest on Madelines head and back. Harrys head rest on her head, he relaxes and hold on to his little family.
Nine and a half hours
Nine and a half hours they had spent in this hospital. It is now morning. The entire day was spent since fresh at four in the morning with pains and contractions. That was fifteen hours of labor. Fifteen hours of pain but now, their angel was here.
The nurses clean up around them and then leave the room so they could have a moment. As soon as they leave Harry begins to cry. Not out loud, silently, happy and proud tears soak his face, Juliette does the same. He leans backward with her so they can rest more. "Are you okay baby?" She with a scratchy voice.
"I'm perfect. This is perfect. You did so good, I am so proud of you. I love you so much." He kisses her cheek and then he keeps his face pressed into hers just enjoying her. "Are you okay?" She just shakes her head 'yes' without saying a word, she is tired.
He didn't want to hold the baby yet. He wanted Juliette to have her moment with her first. They stayed like this for almost two hours before the Doctor came back. She had to check Madeline vitals and Juliettes quickly. Once this was done, a new nurse came in with a wheelchair. From here they are going to the postpartum room where they can rest and sleep.
Juliette is wracked-out. She is dead asleep in the postpartum room. She did so good, I am so proud of her. She did that all by herself. They moved us into the postpartum room after two hours after delivery. They took Madeline away so they could do some testing and take her vitals. In that time period, I laid next to Juliette and helped her to sleep. She needed to sleep.
Madeline was brought back in to us. "Alright Mr. Styles," a nurse comes in with my daughter wrapped up in a small pink blanket. "Here she is, I'll leave you alone after I check Mrs. Styles vitals. Once you get sleepy, I am gonna ask that you press this button, this will just notify us and we will take her into the nursery so you can both relax and sleep." She hands me Madeline and then goes to Juliettes bedside to go check things.
I take Madeline and begin to pace around a bit with my sleeping beauty in my arms. She is so perfect. She is so tiny and fragile. She is beautiful.
The nurse finally leaves and I move to sit on the small couch by the window. "Hi babygirl." As soon as I speak the words her eyes slowly flutter open. "Hi baby." A large smile is on my face while her body is pressed to mine.
(The baby in the photo ^^ doesn't match the description so just use your imagination)
She closes her eyes again, drifting back to sleep. I feel myself grow tired too but I fight it. I want to stay up with her. I don't want to put her down right now. She already has a full head of light brown hair, similar to how mine and Jules looked when we were young so it should darken up. Her eyes are a toned down blue, they won't stay that way so she'll either have hazel eyes like her mum or green eyes like me.
A small little whine comes from her as she shifts in sleeping making my heart explode just a little. She is so perfect.
After some time, I don't even know how long, Juliette begins to wake up and mutters a small "Harry" to get my attention. I get up and walk over to her, she scootches over so I can lay with her. We get situated so her head is rested on my chest and Maddie is scooped in my arm. "How are you sweet girl? How are you feeling?"
"I'm okay, sore, tired, but I'm okay." She whispers, I lean over to kiss her head and I wrap an arm around her. "I love you so much, you know that right? And you know I am so proud of you? You did so good, so good my love."
"I love you too." She hums out at me before putting a hand out so she can play with Maddie's small foot. "I'm gonna go back to sleep now, is that okay?"
"It's more than okay, go to sleep, I'll be right here when you wake up." She tilts her head up and gives me a quick kiss and then turning to give one to Maddie.
Now both my girls are fast asleep in my arms. I'm sure I'll be asleep soon given the silent atmosphere and the long night we've had. When she wakes up I will be right here, I'm never leaving her side.