After a few minutes you were again standing on top of the tower, at the exact spot you had left three days ago. You tried very hard to stay on your feet, but the dizziness took over and your knees couldn't hold your body any longer. Thankfully before you could touch the ground Loki was by your side with a quick move holding you tight.
He gently led you to sit on the bench nearby and you nodded as soon as you were sat. You took a few deep breaths, trying not to throw up. Only a second later the whole team started to come out of the elevator and run towards you. They looked deadly worried and as though they hadn't slept for days. Tony was the first one to arrive at your side, followed by Steve and the others.
"Hey, kid." Tony placed his hand on your shoulder and looked at you, trying to get eye contact but you were still facing the ground. "Talk to me kid, are you okay?" He asked.
"How are you feeling y/n?" Steve asked more calm than Tony.
"Like I have been spinning around for an hour straight." You managed to say as you were starting to breath properly again and the sick feeling in your stomach was going away.
You were finally feeling like you could stand up again. You first lifted your head to see everyone looking at you with worried faces. You let out a small laugh and smiled at the way everyone was so worried about you. You then stood up and everyone took a step back to give you a little space. You didn't say anything and they all kept looking at you like you owed them a lot of explanations. You started for a little while longer, only to keep their suspense. As for their thoughts, they got better by the second.
"I'm fine guys!" You finally decided to end their torment. They all seemed do relived to hear this from you.
"So what happened?" Tony asked.
"It's a long and complicated story, believe me. What's important is that I am healthier and stronger than ever."
"Guys I don't think I like the stronger part very much." Bucky said and everyone laughed.
You then all got inside the elevator and headed to the penthouse. Once you were there you all sat around the living room everyone kept asking you questions. You were so happy and excited to see them all again, especially after everything that had gone through your mind so you didn't mind answering a few questions full of concern from them.
"So is it going to happen again?" Clint asked.
"No, Frigga made sure of it. After unlocking that door in my head I have access to all of my magic and it can never be suppressed again."
"Cool."
"So who locked the door?" Tony suddenly spoke up and your face darkened.
"No one important." You said dryly and sighed.
"Is everything alright y/n?" Steve asked.
"Yes...It's actually late and I really need to rest." You said and stood up.
You picked up the books Frigga had given you and looked at everyone. No one said anything and they just nodded. You said your good nights and entered the corridor, heading to your room. You heard some whispers before you left but you ignored them along with some concerned thoughts of Steve, Tony and Nat.
"y/n!" You heard Loki's voice calling you before you could enter your room. The trickster was in front of you in a second, looking into your eyes. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I am just tired." You told him, avoiding eye contact.
"You can't trick the trickster you know." He told you with a chuckle.
"Loki, I am just tired. Can I go to sleep please?"
"Well, I will not push you any longer but if you wish to talk..."
"I am fine Loki." You gave him a sweet smile and got into your room closing the door behind you.
You let out a loud sigh as the door closed and even some tears fell down your cheeks. Yesterday you had told Sif that you weren't sad about anything that had happened in Asgard with your mother but this turned out to be a lie. You had been suppressing your feelings for the past two days so you would ruin Thor and Loki's visit home but now you were finally alone and you had to let it all out.
You fell to your knees behind the door, letting the books fall of your hands and started crying. You didn't know if the pain you were feeling was coming from finding out that your mother was alive or because she had abandoned you all these years ago or just a combination of everything that had happened the past few days.
You were feeling an enormous amount of pain in your heart and an endless nothingness surrounding you. You had never felt more alone in your life. All you wanted to do was go across the hall and burry yourself in Loki's arms but at the same time you needed to be alone.
After a few minutes you got yourself off the floor and lifted the books while wiping your tears off your cheeks. You put the books on your bookshelf and then sat on the window sill, gazing at the night sky over New York. The city was so peaceful even though it was just late in the afternoon. You really had missed it and that weird feeling every time you looked at it from above.
About an hour passed and your attempts to get yourself together were more and more successful. Suddenly you heard a quiet knock on the door and you quickly wiped the few tears in your cheeks before answering for them to enter.
The door opened slowly and Nat stuck her head inside your room. You immediately gave her a sweet smile and told her to come in. She quietly and with a sympathetic smile on her face came and sat next to you on the window sill.
"You okay?" She asked you.
"Yeah, totally why?" You tried to seem as natural and stable as possible.
"First of all, totally?" She gave you an intense look.
At that point you knew very well that there was no point to lie to her anymore. You let out a sigh and relaxed your muscles, letting your guards down.
Immediately a few tears started running down your cheeks and you took a deep breath before starting talking to Nat. You told her everything that happened form the day you left earth up to the moment you arrived at the same spot on the roof of the tower. You told her about finally letting go of all that power you had been holding back for so long and about finding out that your mother was not dead. You even told her about kissing Loki at the night of the feast. You could see so clearly how much she wanted to talk about that, but she understood that it was not exactly the time for it.
You talked for about two hours, you cried for most of it, but it was actually so nice to finally tell someone about it. Nat really was a great listener and she helped you so much. Within a few hours you were already feeling so much better; she made you realise that you didn't have to get sad over such stuff. Nat had quite the family drama herself so she knew exactly what she was talking about. She lived without her family for many years but then finally found a new one, the Avengers and you. You sobbed at her words but she told you that if you cried she would make your life hell and same goes if you told anyone anything. You decided to listen to her and contained your tears.
Finally she asked you about Asgard and how was your experience there. Of course you started telling her everything you saw there in extreme detail and she seemed quite interested. Then you got to the feast Frigga and Odin had prepared for you and their sons. Nat was immediately more intrigued to hear more and especially about what happened next.
"What do you want me to tell you?" You asked her.
"Everything! How was it?" Nat told you and you gave her a guilty smile.
"Great!" You said and you could feel your cheeks burning up.
"y/n, I need details."
"Well...He was so sweet, loving and... hot." You giggled.
"I am happy for you y/n. And for me of course."
"For you?"
"Tony, Buck and Steve owe me ten bucks. Each."
"Excuse me? I was dying and you were betting on my love life?"
"In our defense we made that bet way before you got sick."
"Like how long?"
"About a week after you came in the tower."
What?
So they knew you liked Loki even before you did?
You talked about it a little more and as it turned out Thor was the one to start the bet. He told everyone he had never seen his brother like that with anyone except their mother and then Tony bet we would get together by the end of the year. Nat and Pepper said by then end of six months and as it turned out they were right. You knew Loki for five and a half months but the connection you two had felt way deeper.
"So now he is you boyfriend or something?"
"I don't know..."
"y/n sweetheart listen to me." Nat put her hand on your shoulder and looked at you with an intense look. "You and Loki have something and we can all see it okay? And don't try playing the shy little girl to me because we both know you are not. If you don't want to date him that's fine but if you do stop the act and go to him."
"Thanks...I guess."
"We all want you to be happy and even though we don't like saying it out loud Loki can make you happy."
"Thank you." You sighed.
"So, now get up. Everyone's in the living room." Nat grabbed your hand and quickly led you to the living room.
As soon as you walked in you saw everyone sitting around drinking, talking and laughing. You really loved to see them like that. At that moment Nat's words came into your mind and made you realise that this was now your family. You smiled and looked at them with a sweet expression and stayed like that until Clint told you to "get your ass and join them for a drink." You laughed and immediately grabbed a beer to join them.
Everyone was there, even Loki, who had his eyes on you quite a lot. You looked at him back of course and smiled.
The rest of the night passed quite smoothly. You all sat around in the living room, drinking talking and laughing. It felt like you hadn't sat all together like that in a very long time. Everyone really enjoyed themselves and the night was truly amazing.
About a few hours later everyone was starting to get very drunk and especially you. Of course Thor and Loki were still standing well and Cap was...better than everyone else. You, along with Tony were the two most drunk one of all. At the beginning of the night Tony had said that you were going to drink like no other night and you both took that quite literally.
Some more time passed and then everyone, one by one started going to bed. After a lot of protesting Loki managed to get you off the couch as well and drag you to your room. He carefully placed you on your bed and kissed you gently on the forehead.
"Goodnight." He whispered but before he could go you grabbed his hand.
"Loki..." You stood on the bed on your knees and looked at him with a half-drunk expression and a fully drunk .
You tried to say something else but all you could think was kissing him, and so you did. He kissed you back as he put his hands on your waist and pulled your body closer to his. You moved your hands to his face and run your fingers through his hair while your kiss became more intense and passionate. Loki took a step forward to the bed as you slowly slid your hand to pull his shirt off. He suddenly stopped and grabbed your hands, looking at you in the eyes.
"What?" You said with a half drunk tone on your voice.
"y/n, you're drunk, you should go to bed." Loki said calmly.
You were in no shape to say anything, or actually knew what was going on. Your mind and judgement was blinded by the huge amount of alcohol in your system. You just nodded and fell on your bed again. Loki covered you with a blanket but you didn't let go of his hand with your last bit of clear mind you still had left.
After that the alcohol completely took over you and everything from the moment is just a blank page.