"Laur? Dinah?" Demi called, her footsteps echoing in the foyer as she shed her coat. Her internal monologue halted when she registered the sound of a heartbeat and a human scent inside.
"Lauren", she addressed me silently, "..are you and Dinah entertaining a guest?"
I glanced at Ari, who was sitting on the sofa, playing with the tassel on a throw pillow like it was the most fascinating thing she'd ever seen. It was the only reason she had conceded when I'd set her down. It had also distracted her from the whole "hunry" thing, whatever that was. I kept a vigilant eye on her, worried that she might topple off the couch and through the glass coffee table next to it.
Dinah plopped down next to her. Ari giggled as her weight jostled her side of the couch, clapping her hands.
"Not exactly," I replied, unsure how to explain the strange situation we found ourselves in. Dinah remained quiet, used to my one-sided communication with our best friend. "Come see."
Demi was in the living room before I could blink, her gaze sewn to Ari. Ari squealed in recognition, reaching a hand out to her.
"Winnie!"
Demi gave her a huge, silly grin. I couldn't help but laugh, never having seen her so carefree with anyone aside from Dinah and myself.
"Hello, sweetheart," she greeted her, tickling Ari under her chin. "It's been a while since I've seen you, Ariana. You've grown." Ari giggled at her attention.
Dinah smirked. "I see you guys know each other."
Demi's confusion was evident. "What is she doing here? Is Ms. Grande here, too?"
Dinah, never one to mince words, was blunt. "Ms. Grande left her kid on our doorstep, Demi. You care to explain what's going on?"
Demi's eyebrows knitted together.
"She's one of my patients. It's not really my place, but I stand in as a family doctor for a few families who can't afford healthcare. The Grandes are one of them."
Dinah's lips quirked, she was expecting more than just a little background information. "And?"
"And?"
Dinah sighed and thrust the envelope full of paperwork at Demi.
"You've been named as Ari's legal guardian," I added, pausing to prop up the little girl who was curiously examining the floor beyond the edge of the couch and about half a second from toppling off of it. "There's a bunch of legal stuff that Dinah says is legit."
Demi skimmed through the documents, papers fluttering rapidly as she read all the pertinent information.
"I swear I had no idea she was planning this." She sounded a lot calmer than I felt. You'd think we were discussing the weather, not the fate of a human being. "Ms. Grande was always a sweet woman… a single mother doing the best she could. She seemed to love Ariana very much."
"Ari," I corrected, unsure why I was making a point of doing so. "She likes to be called Ari."
"Do you know the father or maybe her other parent?" Dinah asked, though that was a front for her real question. She wanted to know was if Ari was Demi’s. Her curiosity was so great, it was like she was screaming the thought in my head.
"No."
"But–"
I interrupted, knowing this could go on for a while if I didn't intervene. "Demi, what Dinah wants to know is if you've ever dated Ari's mother," I said pointedly.
Demi chuckled. "You mean you're asking if I'm her other mother?"
Dinah looked sheepish. "When you say it like that, it sounds dumb."
"I'm not," Demi confirmed. Dinah's face fell. "Sorry to disappoint you. I would have told you if I had a daughter, you know. I wouldn't keep a secret like that. You two are my family as much as if we were biologically related."
Dinah sulked. "I was really looking forward to hearing your stories about how you seduced a human. I thought you were gonna tell us you hooked up with that hot nurse that we know you've been horning over."
"I told you that theory was ridiculous," I reminded Dinah, ignoring her crude thoughts on our best friend’s relationship with her nurses. The very concept of Demi "horning" over anyone was absurd. She was the epitome of respectful.
"I wish I lived with the Cimorelli sisters," Dinah muttered, insolent. "They don't mind sharing. And they don't skimp on details either."
I rolled my eyes. "I think we have more pressing matters to deal with than your need to be entertained by familial sexcapades."
I gestured to Ari, who was now chewing on the pillow she'd been so enthralled with before, her huge eyes following us, as if she were actually paying attention to our conversation.
"Can't you find her hospital records and get an address?" Dinah asked Demi. "It's not like we can keep the little rugrat, even if she is effing cute."
I smirked at Dinah’s poor attempt at child-friendly language. I supposed it was better than nothing. Ari had yet to spout any curses and she'd been with us for almost half an hour.
Demi shook her head. "What I do for the Grande’s isn't legal. I could get fired if it came to light, so I've never kept records. I've never needed them. I remember everything I need to know."
"Well what are we supposed to do, then?" Dinah's frustration was evident.
"We go to law enforcement. Even if these," Demi held up the sheaf of papers, "are legitimate, they're not legally binding without my consent; I haven't signed them. There's got to be something they can do to locate her family."
I glanced at Ari, worried about what that would mean for her. I might not have known her very long, but I wanted her to be safe. The thought of her being returned to parents who didn't want her, or tossed into the foster system was horrifying.
"What if they send her to foster care?" I pointed out. "Who says they'll expend the effort to find her mother? I mean, if she doesn't want to be a parent, are they really going to force her to be?"
Demi offered a reassuring smile. "We'll figure out what's best for her, I promise."
That didn't make me feel better. I had a sinking feeling something bad was about to happen. Ari grabbed the hem of my shirt and gave me her toothy little smile. For some reason that made me feel better than Demi's words had.
Demi stood, collecting all the legal papers. "Okay, so, to the precinct? Dinah, you should probably come with me. You know more about family law than I do."
I froze, not liking where this was headed. "What about me?"
"You should stay and watch Ari. We shouldn't take her down to the station. It's no place for a child. She seems to like you and you were watching her just fine until I got here."
"But Dinah was with me!"
Demi chuckled. "If I know Dinah as well as I think I do, something tells me she was more of a hindrance than a help. You'll be fine."
"She's right, dawg," Dinah agreed.
I opened my mouth to respond, but was caught off guard as a foul smell caught my nose. It took me a moment to recognize it was emanating from deceptively innocent little person sitting on our couch.
Dinah seemed to register what had happened a moment after I did. She stood hastily, happy to have an excuse to get out. "Well then, we best get going. Problems don't solve themselves, you know."
She hardly paused to grab her keys before dragging Demi out the door.
I sat in bewilderment for a moment, unable to believe they had just left me alone with a baby who was clearly in need of a diaper change.
Sighing, I snatched Ari off the couch, cringing at the squishy feel of her diaper.
It wasn't her fault I had two assholes for best friends and it certainly wouldn't be fair to leave her in this state because I was upset with them.
The only problem was, I didn't really know how to fix it. Her mother hadn't left any supplies and it wasn't like we kept much in the way of human hygiene products. Vampires had no use for paper towels or Kleenex, let alone diapers.
Then I remembered we had a single roll of toilet paper hanging in our downstairs bathroom to keep up the illusion we were human, in the rare instances we had guests. That single roll had lasted nearly three years. Maybe I could use what was left of it to fashion a makeshift diaper until we could buy a proper replacement.
I retrieved the roll and headed to the kitchen, depositing Ari on the countertop. Undressing her, I yanked off the disgusting diaper and tossed it into the garbage with a mental reminder to change the bag as soon as possible.
There was no way I was touching anything, so I set her in the sink, running her under a stream of warm water. It didn't seem to help much, so I turned on the sprayer setting, which proved to be much more effective.
Ari giggled as the spray touched her skin – she thought it tickled – so at least she didn't seem to think I was doing a horrible job. I actually felt kind of proud I'd resolved the situation on my own.
Grabbing a wad of toilet paper, I patted her dry and wrapped the remainder of the roll around her in my best imitation of a diaper. Using a little duct tape, I managed to get it to stay together.
Ari prodded it with one of her little fingers. She thought it looked different than usual but it felt really soft, so it was okay. I grinned, pleased that my solution was to her satisfaction.
"Not bad, huh?" I asked. "I mean, for a beginner."
"Teddy," she agreed.
Lifting her into my arms, I decided we could watch TV until Demi and Dinah got back. It wasn't like she could get into much trouble watching TV.
Dinah loved SpongeBob SquarePants, so we subscribed to Nickelodeon. SpongeBob would be appropriate for a nearly 2-year-old, right? I mean, she wouldn't understand what they were saying, but it was a cartoon, and kids liked cartoons. I set Ari on Demi's favourite white loveseat, sitting next to her so I could keep an eye on her.
Ari wasted no time in ensuring the loveseat didn't remain white. It seemed toilet paper wasn't as absorbent as I'd hoped.
I plucked her up and headed back to the kitchen. Ripping off the soggy mess, I glanced around for anything I could use as a replacement. My eyes landed on a pair of sweaters Dinah had bought last week.
I didn't feel even a twinge of remorse as I tore off the price tag (after checking to make sure I'd chosen the more expensive one, of course).
I tied the sweater around Ari, wrapping it several times before securing it with more duct tape. I might have gone a little overboard with the tape. Hopefully that would seal in any more disgusting surprises.
Ari didn't seem nearly as pleased with this solution as she had been with the toilet paper. Her little fingers curled around the massive bulge of fabric and tape, trying ineffectually to remove it.
Her eyes landed on me accusingly when she realized it was held firmly in place with massive amounts of duct tape.
"No! Teddy!"
"Sorry," I apologized, just short of pleading. "Maybe when Kitty and Winnie come back, they'll bring diapers. Try to hold it until then, okay?"
She sniffed, huge watery eyes imploring me to take pity on her and remove the monstrous thing. Guilt prickled, but it wasn't as if I had another choice.
Hoping to distract her, I set her on the couch (though she didn't balance quite right with the lumpy diaper) and handed her the pillow that had so fascinated her before, clicking on the TV. She tossed it aside, looking grumpy.
I heaved a sigh. "I'm trying my best, here."
Life would have been a lot easier if babies could talk. I had thought I would get the gist of what she wanted from her thoughts, but her emotions were running rampant. She wasn't happy and her foul mood was clouding all else.
Maybe she was tired? Wasn't that why babies got cranky? Sure, she was wearing an uncomfortable diaper, but was that really cause for a tantrum?
"Nap time?" I suggested, unsure if she would know the word.
"Sweep?"
I grinned. She knew naptime meant sleeping.
"Yes. It's time to sleep."
I picked up the pillow she had thrown away and grabbed a blanket to cover her, tucking them around her small body.
But she tossed them both on the ground.
I sighed. So much for that. I was pretty sure I wasn't going to be able to force her to do anything that she didn't want to do.
"Hunry!"
I groaned. We were back to that again. That damn word.
"I'm sorry," I muttered. "I don't know what that means."
"Hunry!"
"Yes, hunry!" I snapped, feeling like an ass for getting angry with a baby. "Care to expand on that?"
"Hunry!"
Forcing myself to keep my temper in check, I delved into her mind for clues, but she was still in a foul mood and it took precedence. Well, that made two of us.
I tapped into every ounce of calm I possessed and repeated the word to myself several times, trying to determine what it could mean to a baby.
"Hungry!" I exclaimed, feeling like an idiot for not having cracked that complex code sooner. Was I really that out of touch with human needs? I liked to think I was pretty knowledgeable when it came to humans. I was quickly learning babies were a very different thing.
"Okay." I picked Ari up and headed for the pantry. "Food. I can do that."
Demi was meticulous about keeping up our human façade. I was sure we would have something non-perishable in the cupboards. Not the case. Every single one was empty. Even Old Mother Hubbard would have been ashamed of our cupboards.
"Hunry?" Ari repeated. This time I swore it sounded like there was a questioning note to her voice. Like she didn't understand how a pantry could have no food in it.
"Okay," I muttered to myself. "Food. We can go out and buy food."
A peek out the window revealed enough cloud cover had descended to make it possible to go out.
It would be easy enough to go to a drive through and get a sandwich. Could an almost two-year-old even eat a sandwich? I wasn't sure. It seemed like she had most of her teeth. So she could chew stuff… but what if she didn't like what I picked and refused to eat it? I didn't want her to starve because I was too unknowledgeable to pick the right things.
"Ever been to a grocery store?" I asked her.
She peered up at me blankly. "Teddy."
"I hope you have, because I haven't. I'm almost a century years sold and I've never been to a grocery store. Crazy, right? Don't tell anyone, but I don't eat the same things you do."
I strapped Ari into the backseat of my Volvo and slid into the driver's seat. I knew kids weren't supposed to sit in the front; the big red and yellow sticker on the passenger side said so. I was a better driver than anyone else on the road and my car had a top safety rating. I wasn't too concerned about her getting hurt.
Of course, I didn't anticipate that she would manage to squirm her way out of the seatbelt and end up on the floor of my car.
One moment my eyes were on the road and the next I was peeking in the rearview mirror and the baby in my charge was gone. I'd nearly slammed on the brakes until a giggle and her pattering heartbeat gave her away.
She'd found something shiny on the floor of the car – a hideous gold chain belonging to Dinah, a relic of her gangsta phase – and was attempting to stuff it in her mouth. Steering with a knee, I'd managed to contort myself to retrieve her from the back and plop her into the passenger seat. Maybe she would be safer there, after all.
Getting the chain away from her was another matter. I tried to pull it from her grip but her responding tug was firm. I was in no mood to hear her scream bloody murder, so I let her keep it as long as it didn't seem to be in danger of being ingested.
One hand on the wheel, the other holding Ari down, we managed to get to the nearest grocery store alive. Well, Ari did, anyway. Thank god it was only five minutes away and there were no cops on the road.
"Are you ready to go shopping?" I asked Ari as I scooped her out of the seat.
I glanced around, pleased to see the parking lot had only a handful of cars. Hopefully no one would notice her unfortunate diaper situation.
Inside, the store was more crowded than the empty parking lot indicated. Still, no one seemed to take notice of us, so I kept my head down and pretended this was a normal day for me.
I tried to tug one of the carts out of the stack at the entrance, but they were all chained together. Unsure what was required to get one, I tugged a harder thinking maybe the chain was supposed to come out and it was just stuck. I was surprised to find I'd pulled hard enough to snap the chain.
I deposited Ari in the seat of the cart and hurried into the store, hoping no one would notice the broken metal and ask questions.
I was relieved to find Ari seemed to know exactly what she wanted. She stretched a hand out to a bright blue box featuring a cheerful looking cartoon tiger as we rolled down the cereal aisle.
"These ones?" I grabbed a box off the shelf and put it in the cart.
Ari squealed and clapped.
"Okay, good, you won't starve. Now let's find you some diapers."
As I wandered down the remaining aisles in search of the elusive diapers, Ari managed to spot an astounding array of things that she seemed to feel were necessary additions to the cart. If I tried to pass by one of her suggested items without adding it to the pile, she would screech until I went back and retrieved it.
I was just adding a box of some disgusting looking cream-filled pastries called Twinkies to the cart when a familiar voice called my name.
"Lauren, is that you?"
I turned to face Camila Cabello, a pretty brunette who sat next to me in the Latin course I'd selected as an elective for the latest semester. We hadn't spoken much, aside from a few occasions we'd been paired off for the TA's in-class assignments. She had always been friendly, if a little shy.
She struck me as one of those, sweet all-American girls. She was a great student from what I could tell, and was nice to a fault. And of course, she was gorgeous.
Her hair hung in shiny waves down to her waist and her flawless skin was nearly as pale as mine. Her eyes were a deep brown that matched her hair. She wasn't a classic example of bombshell, but she was beautiful nonetheless. If I was honest with myself, she was exactly the kind of girl I imagined myself with when I thought of having a mate, at least physically.
Most intriguing of all, her mind was silent to me. I'd never come across anyone so resistant to my ability before. It was as if there was a constant barrier in place protecting her thoughts from me.
"Hi, Camila," I smiled weakly. Ari grabbed my sleeve, tugging it to get my attention.
Camila's eyes landed on Ari, widening as they did.
"You have a daughter?" she asked carefully, waving uncertainly at Ari who returned the gesture.
"Uh, no," I said hastily. "I'm babysitting. This is Ari. She's umm my friend’s, Dinah."
"We didn't have much in the way of food left," I continued, "so… we're grocery shopping."
I gestured to the cart, which was stocked high with all of Ari's picks. Camila glanced into it and frowned.
"Are you sure you should be feeding a toddler all those sugary snacks? I mean, I don't want to impede on your authority as babysitter or anything, but that's a lot of crap you have in there."
"Ari picked them," I added. "I didn't know what she'd eat."
Camila chuckled; a soft, warm sound that set me at ease. "So you thought it was a good idea to let a toddler to make all the grocery-shopping decisions?"
"Like I said, I didn't know what she would like. I wanted her to actually eat the stuff I got." I couldn't help my defensive tone.
"I can help if you like," Camila suggested. "I babysit my friend's son, around the same age. They probably eat similar things."
I wasn't about to turn down help. I heaved an internal sigh of relief, more grateful than I could express for the assistance. It felt like I'd finally spotted land after being stuck at sea for months.
"Yes, thank you, that would be great. If you don't mind," I added, trying not to sound too desperate.
"Of course not." She smiled at Ari, tickling under her chin. "You, missy, are very sneaky, taking advantage of your aunty."
Ari squirmed away, giggling.
"Hey, I'm right here," I sniffed. "I haven't spent much time around babies, okay?"
"First thing you need to know is, they're always looking for a chink in your armour. Ari seems to have found yours with ease." Camila smirked.
"What's that?"
"Your inability to say no," she stated matter-of-factly, a hint of a smile tugging at her pretty features. "Okay, let's clean out most of this crap. She can keep one or two things. How long is she staying with you?"
"I'm not sure exactly. That's kind of up in the air right now," I said carefully, not wanting to lie any more than necessary.
"Okay, we'll just get the basics then."
She reached into the cart to grab one of the boxed items to return and burst into laughter.
"Oh my god," she gasped out between chuckles, a hand clasping over her mouth in a poor attempt to stifle them. "What have you done to her?" She pointed at the duct tape and sweater monstrosity that Ari wore in place of a diaper.
I crossed my arms defensively.
"I wasn't left any diapers. I was desperate. I was planning to buy some after getting food."
"And where exactly were you planning to put them?" Camila asked, eyeing the overflowing cart.
I shrugged sheepishly. "I hadn't thought that far ahead."
Together Camila and I cleaned out most of the cart, leaving only the frosted cereal that Ari had picked out initially.
Ari frowned as each item was returned to the shelf but seemed to recognize that Camila was in charge now and she was not someone to be messed with. There was no screaming like when I'd tried to return an item before, just silent pouting. That, I could handle.
"How do you do that?" I asked in awe, once the cart was cleared and Ari was left playing with the single cereal box. "She's not screaming bloody murder for not getting her way."
Ari was babbling at the box, seeming to have an imaginary conversation with the tiger on it.
Camila shrugged. "It's just one of those things. Like I said, babies find and exploit weakness. If you show no weakness, there's nothing for them to exploit. After I started putting everything away, she figured out I wasn't going to let her have all those sugary things."
"That's awfully manipulative for a baby," I pointed out.
Camila laughed, her features lighting up with warmth. "Yeah, it is. You'll figure it out, don't worry. So I suppose you're new to this babysitting thing?"
I nodded. "It's my first time."
"Wow, a first timer, and your friend made you go grocery shopping with her? That's cruel."
I shrugged, pushing the cart down the next aisle. "She had something urgent to attend to though, it's not her fault."
"If you say so."
Camila chose a handful of healthy fruits and vegetables that smelled like dirt. I dropped them into the cart, making a concentrated effort not to let my disgust show. A loaf of bread, some juice, a carton of milk, eggs and cheese slices were also added to the cart. Each item smelled worse than the last.
"That should be enough to hold you over for a little while," Camila said, peering at her selections as she added a sippy cup.
"What do I do with them?"
I was probably giving away my ignorance but I didn't really care. It was better I know than accidentally feed Ari the wrong thing.
Camila laughed. "She's almost two, right? She eats most things you do. Just keep it simple."
"I doubt that," I muttered.
Camila laughed, drawing the wrong conclusion. "Well, it's probably a good idea to keep her away from beer and wings, but stuff like a grilled cheese sandwich or a bowl of cereal she can have. You can make those with the stuff we got."
I didn't dare explain that I had no idea how to make those things. My human memories were limited and didn't include much in the way of food preparation.
"All that's left is getting diapers," Camila pointed out.
In search of diapers, we passed by the toy aisle. I stopped, recognizing the two dolls from Ari's thoughts earlier in the day. The ones she had been playing with in the strangely accurate version of our living room. I pulled one of the dolls off the shelf, examining it. The pink patterned dress was identical. As were the creepy googly eyes.
I handed them both to Ari, who beamed like I'd given her the sun. She waved the dolls happily, clonking them together.
"Dolwy! Teddy!" She extended one to me.
"Later," I offered. "We can play later, okay?"
Camila grinned at me. "That was nice of you. You just made her day, you know."
I shrugged. "I guess I'm getting a hang of this aunty thing."
Camila nodded. "I'd say so. She's lucky to have you. It's obvious you love her very much. I love that she calls you Teddy. That's adorable."
I shrugged bashfully, pointing out that we'd reached the diaper aisle.
"I don't suppose I should ask if you have a preference?" Camila wondered as she perused the massive wall of options.
I shrugged. I didn't know it was possible to have a preference. A diaper was a diaper, wasn't it?
"Is there really that much difference between them?"
Camila chuckled. "Just get this one."
She deposited a package in the cart and examined its contents of it a final time.
"Well, I guess that's everything." She smiled at me.
I smiled back. "Thanks for your help. Ari and I appreciate it very much."
"No problem. It was my pleasure. It was kinda fun and this one," she poked Ari who giggled, "is the cutest thing. If you're ever babysitting again, you should bring her over to meet Justin, my friend's son. I babysit him most afternoons while his mother is at work."
She stood on her toes and kissed my cheek. I could have sworn it burned under her lips, though my skin must have felt cool to her.
"I'd be happy to give you my number, in case you have any questions, or if you want to set something up."
My eyes shot up, meeting hers.
I was no stranger to girls offering me their phone numbers. Usually I had no interest in hearing from them and they were tossed in the trash. Camila, I actually liked. It wasn't just because she'd helped me out, either. I genuinely wanted to get to know her.
Friendship wasn't something I'd ever been allowed in this life and I'd never really felt like I was missing out. Dinah and Demi had always been all I needed. But I found I wanted to be Camila Cabello's friend.
"That would be great, thanks."
She tapped her number into my phone with practiced ease. I hoped she didn't look at the contact list. It was embarrassingly empty. I pocketed it when she handed it back.
"Thanks again, Camila."
"Bye!" Ari input.
She smiled, waving at the little girl a final time. "Bye, Ari. I'll see you in class Thursday, Lauren?"
I nodded, waiting until she disappeared around the corner to turn to Ari with what I'm sure was a ridiculous smile.
"She was really nice, huh?" I asked. "That was Camila. We go to class together."
"Mila."
I nodded. "Yeah, that's her."
When I got back home, the house was still empty. I unloaded the groceries and Ari (who was much more cooperative in the backseat this time, with her dolls as a distraction).
I managed to finagle together a cheese sandwich and a glass of juice for her, just as Camila has suggested. I even cut it into squares and cut off the crusts just like I'd seen mothers do in Kraft commercials. She ate it without wailing once, so I figured I must have done something right.
I'd just handed her a little bowl full of the frosted cereal as a reward for her compliance when my Demi and Dinah strode in the door.
"We've got news," Dinah announced, not bothering to pause before launching into it. "We're keeping Ari."
XD