IMPORTANT A/N : this is basically another alternate universe (a.u.) chapter in grey's where cristina thinks about how her life would be with different endings :}
cristina's mind of endless possibilities
season 10 episode 17
"Jason..." Cristina repeated, glancing down at her patient who suffered a multitude of injuries which caused him to remain paralyzed in his gurney, "would you like me to remove the vent?"
The patient, glancing at his wife one last time before his eyes landed on his doctor, nodded— all the while, Cristina could not help herself but think of how things would be if they ended differently.
☁
Walking to the Nurses' Station with defeat, Cristina placed her patient's tablet in the chargers to join the rest in beautiful formation as she sighed.
Do you know who you are?
Cristina blinked, looking around at the doctors in front of her as everything slowed.
Do you know what has happened to you?
Her face lit up— catching the sight of Owen walking up to the elevator before pressing a button.
Do you want to live this way?
Taking a deep breath of courage, Cristina smiled softly to herself as she approached him, ignoring Jackson's cry of pain once the sound of a crack from the bones in his hands broke the silence.
"Oh, God." Jackson winced, holding his injured hand with the other as Meredith rushed over, worried.
"Jackson—" Meredith's eyes widened while Cristina spoke to Owen, admitting her love for him, "I-I'll go get Holly."
☁
"I'm sorry." Derek apologized while Holly sympathetically looked at Jackson, softly holding onto his previously-injured-now-healed hand, "I know how painful it is. I've been through it myself, but it's been over two years since the injury, and at some point, you just have to say enough is enough."
"What?" Jackson scoff, "No. Y-You have no idea where—"
"L-Look," Holly interrupted, offering him a smile, "your hand just needs more time, okay?"
"Just give your hand rest," Callie added, nodding, "throw yourself into the rehab."
"I've done the rehab!" Jackson outburst, sighing softly as Holly flinched— making him lower his voice, "I-It's been two years... it's done, okay? I'm good enough to operate. I mean, what is this?" He looked at the board members, frowning his brows before he sighed and relaxed his face, sitting back in his chair, "Is this about Mr. Willenstein? That was a routine—"
"The decision has been made." Derek finalized, raising his voice, "You can keep your administrative duties, but you are not cleared to operate. You're not going back into the O.R."
Jackson softly scoffed, eyes looking around the room at the doctors before he abruptly stood and stormed out of the room, too angry to speak anymore.
Glancing up from the table, Holly cleared her throat, "I'll go calm him down— the meeting's over, right?" Derek gave Holly a nod, making the redhead run after her husband. Catching up with him, she spoke, "Jackson—"
"It was a routine..." Jackson spoke, cutting himself off as his voice quivered while he turned to Holly, "It—"
"I know." Holly assured, holding onto his hand before she dragged the two of them into an on-call room, placing both of her hands at the sides of his face as she glanced up at him through her eyelashes, "I know, y-you don't need to convince me, okay? I'm with you."
Jackson exhaled deeply, looking at his previously injured hand before speaking with a defeated voice, "I feel like I can't do anything."
"Jackson," Holly interrupted his thoughts as she grasped onto his hand, "you can do what you want just—"
"Just not surgery?" Jackson muttered in slight anger, prompting Holly to pause before he closed his eyes and inhaled, "I'm sorry, I—"
"I get it." Holly nodded, lightly tightening her hold on the hand, "I'd be pissed too if I couldn't do surgery anymore— but Jackson," She grinned as her eyes softened, "you're so smart—y-you're amazing at the administrative side of things and I know if you put your focus into it, you might actually start to like it again." She beamed, "Or at least try for me?"
Jackson squinted at her with a smile, shaking his head, "Did they pay you?"
"Nope." Holly cheekily remarked, walking over to the door and locked it before making her way to her husband, "But, you know what? I think I can do something to get your mind off of things."
"Oh?" Jackson chuckled, finding himself lip-locked with his wife as his back hit the cushiony surface of the on-call room bed while his hand trailed to her hip— their activity just beginning.
☁
"It's so not fair." Holly mused, squinting her eyes at Cristina and April as Jackson continued to look over the files for the hospital, "They're 'belly buddies'— what am I?" Holly scoffed, gesturing to her small pregnant bump, "Left alone, that's what."
"I'm here." Jackson reminded, looking away from the files to kiss his wife's cheek, "And I think you're forgetting about a certain event that prevented you from joining them."
"I guess." Holly rolled her eyes, scoffing as she looked at Jackson, "I'm never letting Derek drive again."
Jackson chuckled, kissing her cheek again as he nodded, "Yes, dear."
"What's got you so lovey-dovey?" Holly quirked a brow, turning to face him with a smile, "Not that I don't love it— but what's up."
"Frodo's certified." Jackson informed, watching as the smile brightened Holly's glow.
"Really?" She chuckled, "Now he'll be with us at work— I-I mean, he'll be around the Peds patients, but I'm excited! Yay!" She grinned, thinking over their dog walking around the hospital, "Go Frodo!"
☁
"Frodo!" Holly called out, watching as her dog attempted to climb into the bounce house set up for Bailey's seventh birthday, "Do not go in the bouncy house!"
"I've got him." Jackson assured, kissing Holly's cheek before leaving the benches they sat with Arizona and Callie as he rushed to get their dog— and consequently, his accomplice, their daughter, out of the bouncy house, "Rosie! Do not help him!"
"Hey," Callie spoke once Jackson was further away, "what did Erikson say?"
"Oh," Holly looked back at her, "actually," She smiled, "Jackson decided he's had enough of looking through ortho surgeons to help his hand."
"Really?" Arizona cheered, "That's great."
"Yeah." Holly nodded, "He's been really great with Rosie and Frodo, and he's actually liking the administrative stuff— which, I have to admit," Her smile softened, eyes glancing down as she lightly reminisced, "I didn't think he'd fall almost an equal amount of love with it as he did with me."
"Aww." Callie chuckled, "Well, that's great."
"Yeah." Holly grinned, "And it's good that he's starting to get into the flow of things 'cause..." She placed her hand on her abdomen, blushing lightly as Arizona quickly caught on, "there may or may not be a new addition to the family."
"Oh, my God." Arizona gasped, "I knew you had a glow!"
"Wait—" Callie blinked before she gaped with a smile, "Y-You're pregnant?"
"Yes!" Holly outburst, prompting Frodo to run to her to check if she was all right before licking her face, making Holly laugh, "I-I'm fine, Frodo." She looked at Callie and Arizona, "Jackson and I have been waiting to tell people, b-but we just didn't know when was the right time and—"
"Congratulations!" Callie and Arizona cheered, rushing out of their seats to hug Holly.
"Thank you." Holly flushed, "Y-You know," She looked at the doctors as they sat back down in their seats, "after the crash, I didn't think I was going to have any— let alone two, a-and I'm just glad they were wrong."
"Oh, yeah." Arizona nodded, scrunching her nose, "Those nobodies didn't know a thing, I'm not surprised they messed up your chart with someone else."
"Well," Holly beamed, "I'm just glad they were wrong— I-I remember feeling so..." She inhaled, "depressed that I couldn't have kids—" She smiled, looking at the two women in front of her to gave her a sympathetic glance as she beamed, "and now I have Rosie and another on the way."
"Well," Callie voiced with a smile, "I'm just glad everything brought you and Jackson back together."
"They were never separated, Callie." Arizona reminded with a chuckle as Holly looked over at Jackson, a pure smile on her face as she saw the two wave at her while Arizona and Callie thought over Jackson and Holly's dark period.
☁
"Jason..." Cristina repeated, glancing down at her patient who suffered a multitude of injuries which caused him to remain paralyzed in his gurney, "would you like me to remove the vent?"
The patient, glancing at his wife one last time before his eyes landed on the doctor, shook his head— all the while, Cristina felt a small smile approach her lips as she nodded, wondering how things would be if they ended differently.
☁
Walking to the Nurses' Station with cheer, Cristina placed her patient's tablet in the chargers to join the rest in a beautiful formation as she smiled.
Do you know who you are?
Cristina blinked, looking around her surroundings as doctors passed her by and everything slowed.
Do you know what has happened to you?
Her face lit up— catching the sight of Owen walking to the elevator to press a button, wanting to go to his destination.
Do you want to live this way?
Taking a deep breath of courage, Cristina smiled softly to herself as she walked up to Owen— ignoring Jackson's cry of pain once the sound of a crack from the bones in his hands broke through the silence.
"Oh, God." Jackson winced, tightly holding onto his injured hand as Meredith rushed over, worried, "Son of a—"
"Jackson—" Meredith's eyes widened as Cristina spoke to Owen, informing him of her glorious day so they could celebrate, "I-I'll go get Holly."
☁
"What do you mean?" Jackson scoffed, standing on the other side of the Nurses' Station with his wife as they stared at Owen, "it's been six months since my last procedure!"
"Your hand's still not healed!" Owen deadpanned, "You need more P.T. and more time in the skills lab. You are not stepping into that O.R.—"
"Jackson," Holly soothed, trying to bring hope to him as Owen brought him down while she held onto his injured hand with a reassuring smile, "It's okay—"
"Not today, maybe not ever!" Owen shouted, prompting Holly to turn to him with frowned brows.
"Dr. Hunt," Holly glared, "first of all, you need to lower your voice. Second—"
"Oh, okay!" Owen laughed, standing up while Jackson lightly wrapped an arm around his wife's waist, pulling her away from the slightly drunk man, "So, what, nobody can yell at him? Why's that?" He glared at Jackson, "Why is that?! Because you're an Avery?"
Holly tried again, "Dr. Hunt—"
"Oh," Owen mocked, "and now the wife he's finally made up with is coming to his aid? Huh? Are we all just going to forget the yelling and the—"
Holly squinted at the man as Jackson voiced, "That has nothing to do with any of this, and you—"
Owen continued, ignoring the sound of the doors opening behind him as he grew unaware of Cristina and Bailey's presence, "You're just some pampered little rich boy who was gifted a hospital so he thinks it's okay to go ahead and endanger patients, 'cause he's too damn proud to admit that he can't operate anymore!"
"Dr. Hunt!" Bailey yelled, alerting him of the Chief's presence as he paled while his eyes landed on Cristina before walking away.
Holly turned to her husband, "Jackson..."
"I'm sorry." Jackson whispered, glancing down at his parter with softened eyes.
"Jacks..." She placed a hand on his cheek and shook her head, "it's all in the past, okay?"
☁
"My little Rosie~" Holly sang softly, bouncing her newborn daughter in her arms while Jackson sniffled, wrapping an arm around his wife as he placed a delicate hand on the back of his daughter's head.
"She's so tiny." Jackson mused, prompting Holly to glare at him.
"Yeah, well," Holly squinted up at her husband, "it didn't seem like that a few hours ago when she was literally coming out of me."
"You're right." Jackson nodded, kissing her temple, "I'm sorry, sweetheart— she's huge."
"Jerk." Holly rolled her eyes, nudging Jackson with a smile before Derek entered the room, "Hey, Der—"
"Sorry, guys, Rosie." Derek cringed as the other board members began to enter the room, "Emergency board meeting."
"Oh?" Jackson quirked a brow, flickering his eyes through the doctors, "Why—?"
"It's Owen." Meredith informed before she awed at the baby, her first time laying her eyes on the baby since she wasn't able to join Derek when he visited their god-daughter and celebrated the birth of the child, "Cute—"
"April told us she, herself, does not trust Owen Hunt." Arizona informed seriously, not wanting to waste time, "And after a child's life was involved— I move to terminate him. Effective immediately."
And all the while the doctors lowly argued as the newest addition to Holly and Jackson's lives slept soundly, Cristina, accepting her Harper Avery award at a fancy venue, grinned at the cameras as she told her speech into the microphone.
✧
"Jason..." Cristina repeated, glancing down at her patient who suffered a multitude of injuries which caused him to remain paralyzed in his gurney, "would you like me to remove the vent?"
The patient, glancing at his wife one last time before his eyes landed on his doctor, felt his eyes water as he nodded— all the while, Cristina felt a wave of ease hit her as she nodded back at him, understanding his request.
✧
Walking to the Nurses' Station with a small sense of defeat, Cristina placed her patient's tablet in the chargers along with the rest in beautiful formation as she exhaled.
Cristina blinked, looking around at the doctors in front of her as everything slowed, everything seemed too familiar and— there, walking up to the elevators with a hum, was Owen.
Her face lightly brightened as she stared at him— mouth slightly agape as she pondered over her next actions. She could rush to him, admit her love and plague herself with a life full of children and unfulfilling dreams— or have him for a few more months before he grew tired, and reminded himself of his dreams for children she could not fulfill.
Instead, Cristina found herself backing away— pressing her back to the wall as she, with a frown, watched her lover wait for an elevator.
Hearing a clattering sound behind her, Cristina turned and looked at Jackson— attempting to move a computer before warning, "Hey," She pointed, "watch your hand."
"Oh." Jackson nodded, moving the position of his hand, "Thanks."
"Oh," Cristina softly grinned, "no problem."
She turned her head back— and some part of her, feeling joy for saving Jackson's hand, decided to step forward and join Owen before Meredith approached her, "Hey, Cristina." Meredith smiled, "Hey, you got a sec? I could really use a set of eyes on my patient."
"Uh, yeah." Cristina nodded, flickering her eyes between the two, "Um, just give me one, uh—" She paused, watching Owen enter the elevator, "Never mind. Uh, what do you got?"
It was funny, it seemed, that although the scenarios were figments in her imagination— she had foreseen some events in the future fully, and others missed details.
✧
IT'S HOLLY ONLY HOLDING ONTO JACKSON'S INJURED HAND FOR ME ASDKLFJHASDFJ 🥺🥺 HE FEELS SO ASHAMED OF IT AND SHE JUST GOES ✨✨GIMME YOUR HAND✨✨
in case you're wondering why their dog's name is frodo 😳✨... you'll find out LMAO i mean... it wouldn't be hard to find since it's somewhere— AND TO THOSE OF YOU WHO FIND IT, SHHH, but i'll give a little backstory in one of the upcoming chapters where they pick the name :}
BUT ANYWAYS ASDKFJHAS JOLLY AS PARENTS IS JUST AMAZING AND THEIR CHILDREN— IK I'M TECHNICALLY SPOILING RN (JUST CAUSE IT'LL BE AN EXTRA IF ANYTHING) BUT IT'S THE FUNNIEST THING EVER YOU NEED TO KNOW— FOR FATHER'S DAY WHEN JACKSON'S FIFTY, THEY TOOK HIM OUT FOR A FANCY DINNER AND WATCHED A MOVIE, AND THEN FOR MOTHER'S DAY WHEN HOLLY'S FIFTY, THEY LITERALLY BUILT A STATUE FOR HER AND DID A LIVE-WEBINAR IN THE CATHERINE FOX FOUNDATION WHERE THEY BOASTED ABOUT THEIR MOTHER AND HOW MUCH SHE DID FOR THEM
LIKE ASDKJFHASLK LMAOOO JACKSON ACTED SALTY BUT HE LITERALLY PLANNED THE ENTIRE THING WITH THEM AKDJFHAKJKJHASDFA
✨ jolly and their kids supremacy ✨— they literally win over my heart with their planned saturday nights of watching movies together when the kids were little 🥺🥺
aNyWaYs, IMA GO BEFORE I SPOIL MORE ADFLAKJSF HOPE Y'ALL ENJOYED