Once cooking breakfast for Forth and Lam, beam is back to the allotted intern's room he changes to all set for his duty, his face is amused with deep smile feeling contented for cooking breakfast to Forth, the past times when he is young at all times he handled his senior on his fingertips he always says to his senior that someday he will cook for his doctor boyfriend whenever he says that forth used to grin and he can see some spark of being loved in his prince charming eyes
Today his fantasy to cook for his hardworking senior came true he is able to cook breakfast, with an amused smile he keeps buttoning up his shirt buttons he felt lucky to have spare clothes in his locker he is thinking to get his stuff from forth room
****
The minute forth and lam all set for the day, walking through the hall, forth is viewing to lam in frowning, lam raised a brow "what is with that look?" he asked walking along with his friend to the main door
Locking the door, forth asked "I don't understand, in an overnight how come you're supporting beam, when he made your friend a big fool and heart broken,"
He conveys a confused look "I did not say anything for you to ask me in a doubtful manner,"
Forth nod in a serious stern "I doubt you,"
He lift a shoulder saying forth is overstressing
"why you suddenly showering your supportive brother nature on beam?"
"I am not," he shrugged ever so casually
"what about you helping me in taking revenge?" he pucker an eyebrow in testing lam
Lam nod "if that helps the re-union of you, I will definitely help you," he clarifies his friend meaning of revenge with a good smile
This made forth to rise a brow "lam, even after beam saying he played with my feelings just to experiment you still making good prayers, can I know your reason?"
Forth felt his friend being strange, normally lam would be supportive of forth decisions and help him but now even if forth is trying to move on lam is asking his friend to look after his brother
That made forth confused he thinks there is something lam is hiding, his so-called good friend must have a reason to behave like a cupid of god between him and beam
Pressing on the button the elevator doors closed, he nod answering his friend, "Just a good thought forth, we know what beam is?"
Forth shook his head on Lam justifying mostly being supportive of beam, he complained "no, not anymore, if it's in the past yeah I would deny beam confrontations" he sadly brace his shoulder to elevator wall
Lam standing beside to other side of the elevator wall he said "see, this is what I am saying, I don't believe whatever nonsense he spout to you,"
He gives him a sad laugh "you don't," he shook his head for lam being so uncharacteristic being so supportive to beam, he expressed his feeling "of course, me too I did not believe his words, but those words from the beloved fondled me with pain they are still ringing paining me"
Lam nod in calm way "I understand the pain, yet...,"
Forth heaved a sigh, he snipe on lam "just tell me your reasons, I don't want to hear you speaking a list of what beam is!"
Lam made a calm face, he understand he being clear in supporting beam instead of forth he knew forth will be hurt, so he explaining "all I am saying is just follow beam and study him, you give your full attention to him but don't let him know,"
Forth confused with a laugh "lam are you giving me tips to follow beam,"
He shook his head in frustration "I am asking you give it a one more try, I know beam words are meaningless and they did not hurt you so you're standing like a doctor,"
Forth huffed and pocketing his hands "I don't understand what your interest in pressuring me is,"
"I know what my friend wants," he declared with certain confidence
Forth sighed "don't be a stubborn ass, I am thinking you planning something with beam,"
"what?" lam surprised
"if I find you doing anything like cheating, I will be more broken lam, you're are my best friend whom I trust you to core," he warned
Lam gulped with half shook of head "forth, why would I do anything that harm you, I only felt beam had some other problems and I want you to know and get beam back, I want to be together, that is all,"
Forth raised his brows "why do you feel such way? There is something you're hiding?" he nod in a serious way
"forth," lam could not speak for himself
Forth nod in heavy seriousness "you're tight lipped about something, that means you're hiding something from me, what is it? Did beam blackmailed you?" he asked with serious eyes stare
Lam gulping his throat down feeling nervous to lie to his best friend, "forth, try to understand me, I felt beam still loves you but he is acting the opposite,"
Forth half nod "its clear that you and beam are playing on my back,"
"forth no," lam is walking behind forth who is striding in anger,
He is asking him to listen but forth strides to his working room and closed the door with loud thud making lam stand in steps, he ranked his hair in frustration now forth is thinking lam is hiding things form his friend which he don't like the feeling of forth being angry on him
**
Beam heard noises of his friends bustling into their room
Yo is teasing kit as soon as he meets him in the hallway, and ming is shaking his head for yo being tired and sleepy yet he had energy to tease kit
"beam, take a look,"
Kit tugged on yo elbow warning him not to announce to whole world while ming calmly walked to the common working rectangular wooden table which is placed in the centre of the room he sat on chair looking to his friends teasing kit and kit pouting on him
"finally kit-kat..." Beam happy eyes turned kit pouting on ming
Kit glared "we have something to talk, remember?" he asked with serious eyes
"kit, its nothing serious," beam answered aware of kit glaring him he pressed his lips in silence while ming is staring to the two best friends
"I am going to sleep, if he tell anything, let me know when I woke up, by the way I think beam is in relationship with Dr.Forth, he is with him last night," yo rolled his eyes on beam before moving to other part of the room and jumped on the cot like bed "good night for me,"
Beam looks back to kit and rubbing his neck "kit, it's not like I want to hide from you,"
Kit hissed "then?"
"both of you sit down," ming asked
Kit dragged beam hand to walk along and sat on opposite side to ming and beam sat beside kit
"tell me everything, from how long you know him?" he questioned
Beam gives him wary looks, while kit pinched on beam forearm that is resting on handles of the chair
"ahh..kit," he cried out
"speak up," he demand
Beam turned sad upon saying his past, "I know him from my high school, p'forth used to study in the opposite college campus,"
"so your love story started their," kit asked and beam nod
"tell me what happen?"
"five years, we know each other and we both had feelings for each other, but I tried not to express them and keep distance, but I could not," he said with pale face
"why you don't like him that much," ming asked
Kit give him a look asking him to stay silent and ming gives him a pout
"I do love him, but.."
"but, what?" kit asked looking to beam mist eyes
"I pushed him away, I don't deserve him.."
"beam, why do you feel in such way?" kit asked
Feeling warm tears in his eyes, beam shook his head "I thought he will forget me once I reject him , but he still.." his eyes trembled to hold tears
"he is still asking you," kit asked with a worry for beam breaking down again
"I scold him on face, I told him I don't," he lower his head with tears falling freely like tiny drops
Kit pulled him into hug and beam is silently wetting kit shoulder "if you love him, tell me, why you're pushing him away,"
Beam back is still weeping in silence
Ming walked past his chair and reached for beam shoulder "beam," he is calling but beam is still hugging kit tight he is leaving tears with tightly closed eyes alongside kit keeps consoling him not understanding what is the painful reason behind beam sufferings is!
After five minutes beam left kit hug and cleaned his eyes "sorry, I cannot say anything .."
Kit nod patting his shoulder "its okay, don't force, but listen beam don't push him away, its been years and p'forth, is still loving you, if there is any problem talk out," he suggested as beam is not opening up yet kit can see how miserable beam is so he suggested
"I have work," he got up from chair with a nod
Ming sat to the chair where beam left a while ago he hold kit fingers who is deep in thoughts "what must be his reasons to push him away?"
He shrugged in sad way "I even see him having rings, might be P'forth proposed him at that time,"
Ming nod thinking all the way "how about you talk with phee, you know him well more than anyone"
Kit nod with a smile "I will see, when I get time I will talk out with phee,"
"had breakfast?" ming caressed kit worried knuckles
Instantly kit relaxed giving him a warm smile "no, what about you baby?"
"eew..baby is so clinching," ming laughs
And kit shakes his head "come on I am losing my pride,"
"aww baby" ming called him with endearment making kit blush
"stop.. we suck in endearments" he laughed
"how about honey, sweet, love, darling.." ming is asking him
"mingkwan and ming, as for me kit, are better than all those cheesy endearments," he said
While ming lean in dropping a kiss on kit lips, kit gasped placing a hand on ming chest "someone might see us" his eyes widen
Ming chuckled "let them, we are not doing any sin? Are we!" he winked pulling kit chair close to him which has small wheels and easy to pull around
Kit struggled in pushing ming, ming is not leaving the chair handles he keeps making them sit closer parting kit legs he moved his legs in-between sitting closer to kit face and he was smiling to kit struggling
"cute" he murmured close to kit face making him stop struggling
Kit gives him shy face "don't start again,"
Ming smiled tilting his head he keeps staring to kit face, while kits say "lets go and grab some breakfast,"
"can I have my breakfast here.." ming is leaning in while kit smiles
"stop it ming," ming is leaning in while kit is playing push and pull
**
During today's class and surgeries forth never given any eyes of attention to beam who is always staring to forth feeling a tight pain in his chest, he regret to spout such nonsense to the senior who once loved him like there is no other day, he scold himself for saying all unnecessary words to forth
He did not even knew he started crying as soon as forth left the class ming and kit were shocked, kit shook beam trembling shoulder which made beam to get into kit arms and crying his heart out while ming who sat beside kit felt sadden for beam sobbing he placed hand on beam weeping back
"beam," ming asking him stop crying and kit is coaxing him
He left the hug murmuring a sorry
But kit hold beam face "tell us, what is making you cry in this way," he asked with pleading eyes
Beam shook his head in a sad way
"beam if you love him so much then why rejecting and suffering in this way," ming enquired
**
Meanwhile forth sat in his chair feeling goose bumps all over his skin he can still feel how beam is affecting him he tried his best to avoid beam and turn his senses to null point, yet still he can feel beam staring doe eyes his dark chocolate eyes keeps pestering him. Throughout the class every second he felt beam is giving him a deep looks which is more than necessary
he felt his heart is tugging every time and his mind is asking him repeatedly to take a look and then again he comforted himself not to see in the direction he said to himself it's just a hallucination he repeated twice every time his heart beats like a drummer
Dr.phana casually walks in placing his stethoscope on table he reached for side chair sitting he placed the files on the working table he gave a look to his co-doctor who is in deep thoughts he waited and stretched his limbs groaning in relaxation
"oh pha," forth spelled
"did I disturb your day dreaming," he asked
Forth sighed he shook his head
Phana nod "here are the piled up surgeries,"
"any critical or emergency case,"
Phana nod "one, we need to perform in the afternoon section, pretty much complicated and need some study,"
Forth nod is stressed face, and his co-doctor opened the file mind reading the case and explaining to forth and nod asking him "how many arteries are blocked?"
"two," phana replied "also had pacemaker problem,"
"complicated,"
He nod
"okay let's make it in the afternoon," phana said and forth nod in frowning
"still having hangover from last night," he asked
Forth gives him a small smile "I am okay for the day,"
"who is beam?" he asked again "from the new intern batch, are you both known each other form a long time," he asked with certain eyes as if he is guessing something between his friend and intern
Forth did not give him a complete nod
"so, last night which I see is true, why you're hiding your boyfriend," he asked in a teasing tone
Forth shook his head with a doubtful laugh "what boyfriend? Why would I hide from you, its nothing like that," he dismissed
"come on forth I know what you're and after from what I witnessed you cannot so easily escape from me," he said with confidence in his eyes as if he caught his friend dating a intern in secret "hey, I won't judge you for dating a intern, love has no rules," he chide
Forth is confused even more, He did not understand
Phana winked showing his phone screen there are photos of beam siting on forth lap and he gently tap on forth shoulder "come on now I pulled the cats out of bag," he gives a proud smile
Forth snatched the phone scrolling the photos he turned red they are intimate in bone crushing hug.
he closed his eyes even after beam yelling on him he still hugged beam he grip the phone between his fingers, he trying to think what he did when he is drunk
The doctor composing himself , his voice quivered "pha, can.n you tell me clearly, did I do anything?"
Pha shook his head "do the photos look like that, don't worry you and intern were comforting each other in a tight hug,"
Forth turned red "stop exaggerating pha,"
"oiee...am I seeing the doctor blushing"
Forth shook his head "tell me, is it beam that help me last night,"
Phana simply nod, "but...is anything wrong."
Forth is turning serious, he closed his eyes and shook his head, he is calming himself
"forth, I am asking you, don't take this seriously, I thought you guys are dating and I thought to ask you and say it's okay to come out," he mentioned carefully
Forth shook his head "nothing serious, don't worry I understand what you trying to say," he mentioned
Phana nod "Is it a problem like, beam is not accepting your proposal or something like that,"
Forth deny him "no pha, we are not in any relation and last night I was pretty drunk,"
Pha amused a smile saying he don't believe such "hey, I even see beam being worried, when he got a call from your father his face turned pale he promised your father to not worry and the way he rushed and when he see someone sitting on your lap he fumed in anger at that person,"
Forth gulping he looks to pha for confirmation and the doctor nod "that is how he reacted,"
"It may not be what you think?" he replied in a slow voice and not confident on what he is saying
"hey I have never seen you this down," he slowly left the hug, when his observes forth eyes are mist
Lam walks in looking to the uncertain atmosphere around his friends "anything wrong,"
Forth did not spare him any glance and that pained lam while lam looks to phana to say something
Phana shrug "heart broken..is what forth is representing"
Lam totally wants to roll his eyes "again?"
Forth stood form his chair which anger pumping in him he pushed his chair getting out and walking pass the table, lam holds his elbow "forth, can we talk buddy?"
Forth shook his elbow form lam hold "something is really missing" he sneered
lam turned cold on spot, he huffed trying to speak, "forth listen, I am trying to help you,"
forth walks out form their while lam and phana exchanged worried faces
****
Beam feeling hurt since the non-sense he spill to forth, he is till the restroom vomiting his stomach out
Forth entered is searching for beam everywhere he want to speak out how dare for beam to say he is experimenting his feelings he is striding to the interns room and barged in making the interns get scared to hell "where is beam?"
The loud voice caused kit to stand to his feet, he gulps by the doctor forth is intimidating his aura he can feel the danger that his friend is going to see soon
Kit swallowing his tension he replied "he went to washroom,"
"which one,"
"common washroom ..end of the floor," he replied feeling tensed "but..phee,"
Forth is impatient he is about to close the door, when he heard kit calling him as phee he stops closing the door and ask "what?"
"bea.m is.."
Forth waited for kit to speak up but seeing kit is struggling to speak he understand he can sense the same thing with lam, everyone is trying to convey something to forth but they could not he can see something is stopping them he directly wants to talk out with beam
From one side he wants to be understanding and ask beam if he wants any help or if beam is in any trouble, on other hand he also fears and still hurt for what beam spout to him, without wasting any time he closed the door and striding to the end of the floor with many questions keep haunting him he feels miserable.
If its true that beam help him last night, then its true that beam supported forth to his bedroom, then its also true he did kissed beam and beam let him do, he clearly remember beam saying 'if it's a dream what will you do?' the visual keep playing in forth head
Sprinting in anger strides to the end of the floor he push the door open and walked into the other side of the wash area where he can see two people already leaving and beam is washing his face and pushing the wet hair all the way to backside and using fingers he is neatly partitioning the wet hair strands