NOTE: Please take time to read.
This chapter is not for everyone. This is really a f*ucked one. There would be graphic description of horrible acts. If you are not comfortable with this, you can skip this chapter.
Thank you.
- HM
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He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. and if you gaze for long into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you. - Friedrich Nietzche
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Elodie's POV
"Please. Please. Let me go. I didn't hear anything. I didn't see a thing."
Nanginginig na ang buong katawan ko. Maiihi na ako sa sobrang kaba habang napapagitnaan ng dalawang lalaki. Pero parang wala silang naririnig sa sinasabi ko. Tawanan lang sila ng tawanan.
"Paano idi-dispose ito? Dapat malinis." Sabi ng lalaki sa tabi ko. Pakiramdam ko ay isang bagay lang akong pinag-uusapan nila kung saan itatapon.
"Tulad ng dati. Chop-chop." Sagot ng nagmamaneho. Hindi man lang kami tinapunan ng tingin.
Pakiramdam ko ay nanlamig ang buong katawan ko sa narinig. They were going to kill me, and they were going to chop my body.
Automatic na tumulo ang luha ko maisip ko lang na sa ganoon magtatapos ang buhay ko. All I wanted to do was to do my job. It wasn't my fault that I was there. At the wrong place, at the wrong time.
"'Tangina, chop-chop na naman? Ayoko na ng ganoon. Ang hirap. Masakit sa kamay. Lalo na kapag nagsasaksak. Badtrip kapag may mga tinatamaang buto," reklamo ng isa pang nasa tabi ko.
"Saan pa tayo pupunta? Dito na natin tirahin 'to," sabi pa ng nasa tabi ko. Naalala ko na ito ang tinawag na Pol kanina.
Hindi kumibo ang nagmamaneho. Tingin ko ito ang pinaka-leader nila at kung ano ang sabihin ng lalaki ay sinusunod nito. Patuloy lang ito sa pagmamaneho at nakita kong isang warehouse ang pinasok nito. Ipinarada ang sasakyan tapos ay bumaba. Sabay na bumaba ang dalawang nasa tabi ko. Ako, hindi ako gumagalaw. Shit. I don't want something bad happen to me.
Sumilip sa kotse ang lalaking Pol ang pangalan at ngumisi sa akin. "Baba na."
Umiling lang ako at lalong nagsiksik sa loob.
"Baba na," pagkasabi noon ay hinila ako palabas ng lalaki. Halos masubsob ako sa lupa. Hinawakan niya ang buhok ko at pahila na dinala sa isang silid tapos ay parang basura na itinapon doon.
Naabutan ko doon na nakaupo sa isang couch ang lalaking leader. May hawak na bote ng beer tapos ay nakatingin lang sa akin.
"What will I do with you?" Nakataas ang kilay niya habang nakatitig sa akin.
Napalunok ako. "S-Sir. Please. Please. I am begging you. I am not going to tell anything. I didn't see a thing. Please. Just let me go," umiiyak na pagmamakaawa ko. Lumuhod na ako sa puwesto ko para lang pakinggan niya ang pagmamakaawa ko.
Pero natawa lang siya habang nakatingin sa akin. Tinapunan ng tingin ang dalawang kasama na parehong nasa likuran ko. Maging sa kanila ay nagmamakaawa ako.
"Crawl." Sabi ng lalaking nakaupo sa couch.
Naguluhan ako sa sinabi niya. "What?"
"Bobo ka ba? Hindi ka makaintindi ng ingles? Gumapang ka at lumapit ka sa akin." Matigas na sabi nito. Nagtatawanan naman ang dalawang lalaking nasa likod ko.
Napalunok ako at napailing. May dinukot sa likuran niya ang lalaki at naglabas ng baril at napasigaw ako nang paputukan niya ako sa gilid. Lalong lumakas ang pag-iyak ko.
"Putangina ka, gumapang ka palapit sa akin!" Bulyaw nito.
Wala akong magawa, dahan-dahan akong lumapit sa lugar ng lalaki. Sinisenyas niyang lumapit pa ako hanggang nasa harap na niya.
Demonyo ang tingin ko sa lalaking nasa harap ko habang nakatingin sa akin. Umayos siya ng upo at nakita kong ini-unbuckle niya ang belt niya tapos ay tinanggal ang pagkakabutones ng pantalon at ang zipper. Gusto kong masuka nang ilabas niya ang pagkakalaki niya sa harap ko.
"Suck this."
Nanlalaki ang mata kong nakatingin sa kanya tapos ay umiling.
"Are you going to suck this, or I am going to blow your brains?" Itinapat niya ang baril sa ulo ko.
"No. Please. Don't let me do this," ang lakas ng hagulgol ko. Never in my life that I felt so humiliated like this.
"'Tangina dami mong arte." Pabigla niyang hinila ang buhok ko at pilit na isinubsob sa harapan niya. God damn it. His penis was touching my face. He wanted me to put this shit in my mouth? Nakakadiri!
"Sabi ko ng isubo mo!" Hinawakan niya ng mariin ang pisngi ko at sapilitang ipinasok iyon sa bibig ko.
God. What did I do to deserve this? I was crying while his penis was in my mouth. I don't want to do this.
But I am going to fight. I am not going to let them do this to me. I know they were going to kill me, and the least I could do was to fight for my life even if I knew I am going to lose.
My mouth was full of his penis. I wanted to vomit. The stale smell of his crotch was really making me nauseous.
And with all my strength, I fought back by biting his penis so hard.
Ang lakas ng sigaw ng lalaki at marahas akong itinulak. Bagsak ako sa matigas na semento. Agad na hinawakan ang pagkalalaki niya at halos umiiyak sa sobrang sakit ng ginawa ko. Bahagya akong napangiti. Bagay lang iyon sa kanya. If I could bite it off, I would do it.
"Putangina mo!" Tumayo at lumapit sa akin tapos ay malakas akong sinuntok sa mukha. Nahilo ako sa ginawa niyang iyon. Naramdaman kong may tumulo sa ilong ko. Marahas niya akong itinayo tapos ay muling sinuntok. Isa. Dalawa. Pakiramdam ko ay basag na ang mukha ko dahil sa ginawa niya.
"Kinagat ka?" Kahit hilo ako ay naririnig kong natatawa ang nagsabi noon.
"Fuck you, Karl." Galit na sabi ng lalaki. Narinig ko pa siyang mahinang umaray nang muli niyang hawakan ang pagkalalaki niya.
"Animal ka naman kasi, Jorge. May pa-suck-suck ka pang nalalaman. Eh, puwede naman fuck na agad."
Pagkasabi noon ay naramdaman kong may bumitbit sa akin at pilit na inalis ang suot kong blazer. Pinagpupunit ang damit ko hanggang sa wala ng matira kundi under wears na lang. Pero kahit nahihilo ako ay pilit pa rin akong nanlalaban. My right eye was shut already because of the hard punch that I took from the man that I bit.
"Are we really going to do this? I mean, she witnessed that we killed Pedro. We could kill her right away. Hindi na kailangang gawin ang ganito." Ibang boses ang narinig ko.
"Huwag kang sumawsaw kung ayaw mong tumikim." Sagot ng lalaking naghubad sa akin.
He pulled my hair and violently smashed my body on the table. He was pressing my head on the table while I felt his other hand ripped off my panties. He pulled my legs apart and without a word, he shoved himself inside me.
I was screaming in pain. This fucking experience was horrible I wanted to die right at this very moment. A stranger violating me. I never had any experience with any man. I was reserving myself for someone who could rightfully owned my body. But right now, this man was abusing me. Raping me.
"'Tangina, jackpot! Virgin!" His voice was like a demon yelling to his cohorts. He kept on fucking me, pulling my hair vigorously I felt all of it would take off my scalp. He was slapping my behind, punching my back. Pressing my head on the table hard. I was screaming and he put something in my mouth to gag my screams.
"Fucking asshole, Karl. Ang manyakis mo talaga." Narinig kong sabi ng isang lalaki.
"Hindi na puwede si Jorge. Maga na ang etits kasi kinagat," humalakhak pa ng malakas ang rapist ko.
Pinipilit ko talagang manlaban sa gumagawa nito sa akin. But he punched me so hard on my face I almost lost consciousness. He punched my back over and over. He was choking me until I am out of breath. My body gave in. I felt it went limp until I couldn't move anymore.
I heard him moaned and he moved away from me. There was a total silence in the room. I heard zipping pants and harbor breaths.
"Buwenas. Sino susunod?"
I am still leaning on the table. I couldn't move. All I could do was to cry. I was in pain all over. I was wishing they should have killed me instead of doing these horrible things to me.
I felt someone forcefully took me off from the table and threw me away on the floor. It was the man that I bit the penis. He was looking at my face, stroking it then gave it a hard punch again.
"'Tangina mo ka. Ang sakit ng ginawa mo sa akin. Pagbabayaran mo 'yon."
I didn't have the courage to say anything. My throat was aching because of the choking earlier and right now, he was doing it to me again while he was beginning to rape me. I closed my eyes when I felt he pushed himself inside me. He was like an animal while raping me. He was slapping and punching my face. I could hear laughs around me. Clanking of bottles. They were celebrating the nightmare that they were giving to me.
I am not moving at all. I am letting them treat me like this. What was the use of fighting when I couldn't move my body? I felt sore all over. When he was done, he pulled himself and released his load on my face.
"'Yan bagay sa'yo maarte ka." He left me like a garbage on the floor. "Pol, your turn." Sabi pa nito.
"I don't want to taste your leftovers. Puwede bang idispatsa na 'yan nang makauwi na," I could feel disgust on his tone.
"Putangina."
Ramdam ko ang kaba sa boses ng nagsalitang iyon.
"Bakit?"
"We're fucked."
"What? Why?"
"'Tangina. Shit. Look at this."
What? What did they see? Kahit gusto kong alamin ang pinag-uusapan nila ay hindi ko magawang igalaw ang katawan ko. Kahit nga ang ibiling ang ulo ko ay hindi ko magawa sa sobrang sakit.
"Her name is Elodie Yen Valderama. Valderama. I found her ID."
"So?"
"Gago ka ba? Anak ni Valderama 'yan."
"What? Gago. Hindi."
"Look at her ID! I found this inside her blazer."
Katahimikan ang narinig ko sa paligid. Maya-maya ay mahihinang 'shit'.
"Anong gagawin natin? Nandiyan na 'yan. Kill her."
"Siraulo ka, Jorge. We can't just kill her. Hahanapin 'to. Kilala ang tatay nito."
"And so? Kilala din naman ang tatay natin. Dad can fix this. He always fixes our mess."
"God damn it!"
Wait. Ibang boses iyon.
"Dad!" Magkakapanabay na banggit ng tatlong lalaki.
"What the fuck is this mess?" Dama ko ang galit sa boses ng lalaking dumating. Boses pa lang ay alam ko ng may-edad ito.
"We just had some fun."
Wala akong narinig na sagot pero parang nagkakagulo sila. Parang may binubugbog.
"Mga gago kayo! Gago! I didn't tell you to kill Pedro. I told you na paaminin 'nyo lang. I can call cleaners to do that shit!"
"Hindi ka pa ba masaya, Dad? Kami na ang naglilinis ng kalat."
"And this? Nagbitbit pa kayo ng basura dito? Ang tatanga 'nyo! She saw your faces. Makikilala 'nya kayo."
"Then we'll shut her up."
Malakas na putok ng baril ang narinig ko. Isa dalawa.
And I felt something stung on my chest and abdomen. God. Someone shot me.
I was crying. And I reached the end of my life. I never imagined that I could die like this.
"This is shit." Boses ng may-edad na lalaki iyon tapos ay parang may tinatawagan. May kausap. Hanggang sa maramdaman kong binuhat ako at inilagay ako sa parang plastic.
"Buhay pa ba?"
"Naghihingalo. Mamamatay na 'yan mamaya."
Naramdaman kong binalot ako sa plastic at binuhat. Ipinasok sa kung saan. There I lost consciousness.
I knew this would be my end.
Definitely this was my end but how come when I tried to open my eyes I could still do it?
"Who did you cross? What did you do to take this kind of shit?"
I heard a faint voice. It was blurry but definitely it was pitch black. I could feel movements around me. I was thrown to the rough floor. Alam kong ibang lugar na ito. And I smell something dousing me.
Gasoline.
Wala na akong maramdaman sa katawan ko. Nanlalamig ako. Hirap na rin akong huminga. Napaungol ako at sinubukan kong humigit ng hininga pero napaubo ako.
"H-help me."
Hindi ko alam kung paano ko pa nasabi iyon. Pero wala akong sagot na narinig mula sa paligid ko. Napapikit ako nang may liwanag na tumapat sa mukha ko.
"P-please... h-help..."
Hindi ko makita ang mukha ng kung sino mang tao na narito pero inalis niya ang nakataklob na plastic sa akin. Pero sigurado ako na lalaki ito. Iyon ang bulto na nakikita ko.
"I-I don't want to die..." mahinang-mahinang sabi ko. But I know death was around the corner. I heard phone ringing tapos ay may kausap ang lalaki. Maya-maya ay naramdaman kong inayos niya ang plastic na nakabalot sa akin.
I felt heat on my skin. The smell of gasoline was assaulting my nose.
He was going to burn me alive.