(You probably don't know why ya'll gonna hate me in the future. I f*ckin' mean it. REALLY f8cking hate me.)
_____________________________________
Grojband sits in the garage, brooding and sulking.
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
Copy and Paste is wonderful.
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
"My brain feels like-PghT."
"Hey, (Y/N), is this how you feel all the time?"
". . .Yeah."
"What do you do when you get like this?"
"TV."
Corey kicks off his shoe and hits the computer. It surprisingly turns on.
"And now for "What Dat?" with Buzz Newsworthy."O̶h̶,̶ ̶g̶o̶d̶ ̶w̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶I̶'̶m̶ ̶w̶r̶i̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶d̶,̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶a̶c̶t̶u̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶s̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶I̶'̶m̶ ̶a̶ ̶2̶0̶1̶0̶ ̶I̶n̶v̶a̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶Z̶i̶m̶ ̶f̶a̶n̶.̶
"Thank you, Chance Happening. Dat would be the tallest cake in all of Peaceville."
Grojband gathers around the computer, "What dat?"
Buzz continues, "100 stories of stories of flakey bakey, sugar cakey! MmmMmm!"
Laney snrks, "If the cake was really that tall? We'd be able to see it from-"
She lifts the garage, and yes, it was actually that tall.
"Caaaaaaaaaaaaake. . ." The twins drone.
"Friends, I vow to you this day that we will Eat.That.Cake!" Corey's tongue peaks from a smile.
"To those who would eat that cake-"
"He's talking about us!" (Y/N) pats Kon several times.
"You can forget it."
"Awe."
"Unless you're invited to the wedding of Bake Barnera's Barnera Barney."
Corey runs up onto the stage with his guitar.
"Guys. There's only one way we're gonna Eat.That.Cake"
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Eat That Cake Transition
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Grojband looks around at the many cranes piling cake layers.
"Anybody looking for a wedding band?"
"Me! I'm Cake Barney, owner of the Bake Barn and happy dad to the sweetest little bride in Peaceville."
Barney gestures to his daughter who is currently yelling at the wedding planner.
"I want more heart shaped sequins molded into kissing puppies with hearts for eyes that say 'I Ruv Rou', and then sneeze butterflies."
"Coulda swore that was my Aunt Karen."
"She sure is crazy. . .about love. I need some really lovey songs for his wedding or I don't know what she'll do."
"We're all about the cake-UH love."
Kin slumps his head down as both him and (Y/N) look at each other briefly before bursting out laughing.
"Corey? Sing a love song? Scoff!" Trina walks into the wedding although she's wearing a dark green hoodie and she has mascara running down her eyes, "He's never been in love, and totally knows nothing about it!
"DADDY!" Bake Barnera runs up to the band and her father, "Only love-wuvers can sing at my wedding!"
Cake Barney slings a hand over Corey's shoulder.
"Sorry, Corey. If love ain't in your heart, it ain't coming out of your head. We'll find another band."
Barney and his daughter walk off.
Corey swings his head around to face his sister.
"Why did you ruin our gig?!"
Trina yells back, "If I can't have love, no one can!"
"I used to be in max love with my sweater, Pinkcredible, but now I'm in the hoodies and Pinkcredible totally wouldn't change for me."
"So there's no way you're gonna have something you love when love just did me wrong," She pulls up her hood, "Mina, cupcake!"
Mina shoves a cupcake into Trina's mouth and she grasps the hoodie.
"Uhh. . ."
"Tastes like sad," She sobs more.
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Barney was just slathering frosting on the cake until Corey and Laney interrupt.
"Barney, I could totally crush-UH, cuddle, a love song, I'm madly in love with cake-I MEAN-"
Corey rubs his arms before glancing around him for. . .something.
A lightbulb spawns over Laney's head as she embraces Corey.
"ME! Corey's in love with me!"
"Whaaaaaa,-" Corey spots Kin miming eating a cake with a (Y/N) and Kon nodding, "aaaaHOO!"
"YEAH! That's what love makes me yell!"
"Okay, but if you wanna play this weddin,' you'd better be so in love that it makes me puke."
"We'll all puke!"
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Fake Love Equals Cake
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"Spill. Spill. Spill!"
(Y/N) jumps in place while Laney holds her arm.
"Well, I wanted Corey and I to go on several dates."
"Several?"
"If it's gonna be that many until he'll love me, I'll do it."
"Please tell me you got swan boating in there."
"I did, but I don't see how romantic boating in a swan so romantic."
"Well, me and Kon do it all the time! Whatever's platonic can be turned romantic."
"I've only got a while until Corey falls in love, so I should get going," Laney walks away from (Y/N).
"Hope it goes well!" (Y/N) laughs to thereself.
Kon comes running to (Y/N) in a fit of excitement.
"Yo, Kon."
"Dude, me and Kin are buying water guns! Wanna come with?"
"UH, Yeah-!" (Y/N) starts jogging off although they jogs back, "Wait, you said 'and Kin'. I don't do stuff with Kin unless it's band related."
Kon sighs, "Come ON! Can't you too hang out together once?"
(Y/N) bares their teeth.
"For me?"
(Y/N) sucks in air.
"FINE."
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Laney and Corey sit on a plaid blanket with a basket between them
"We've only got a few hours to make you fall in love."
"For fakesies to eat cakesies!"
"Oh. Yeah, total false love, but we need to know how to do in love stuff, so you know how it feels!"
"For others!"
"And picnics are more lovely than an all you can eat cheese fries because. . .?"
Laney ignores everything said and gazes at Corey.
"What's wrong with your eyes-"
Kin and Kon burst from the picnic basket.
"You got a bug in there or somethin'?"
"You should wash it before it get's infected with puss."
Kin pulls out a glass spray bottle. He then proceeds to spray water into her eye.
The twins laugh as Laney scorns.
"BEAT IT, SO COREY CAN LOVE ME!!!"
.
.
.
"Huh?"
The four look over at a confused (Y/N). They're holding a large water gun.
They hold the gun tighter to their chest, "Oh, no. Carry on."
"I just wanted to drown Kin in the Tsunami-3000 Anniversary Edition, but go on."
Everyone goes to look back at Laney.
"Heheh, so we can fool Barney and cake can happen!"
"Now, we're talkin' romance!"
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The two have moved on to a parlor where Corey is lackadaisically drinking a milkshake.
"Sharing a milkshake is super cute."
"But I wanted banana-"
"Chocolate's cuter."
"B U B B L E T I M E"
Kin and Kon stab their straws in to the milkshake and blow air into the drink.
Chocolate splatters onto both Laney and Corey and the twins laugh.
Their titters are interrupted by loud a$$ slurping.
"(N/N), I thought you went home."
"How'd you get that black eye?"
(Y/N) rolls their eyes, "Nah, I went to a laser tag place and shot people with water since KON bailed out on me!"
"You don't need me to tell you when to hang out, dude."
The band sits in a thick silence.
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They have moved on to a romantic stroll on the beach.
Laney once again ogles Corey. He makes a silly face in return.
He chuckles as Laney purses her lips.
She then splashes water on him. Corey and Laney start giggling and splashing each other.
Two shark fins swim around them.
"Shark attack!"
Ah, you guessed it. Kin and Kon.
"NO! Nononono-" (Y/N) runs over with their water gun in hand, "Laney's gonna kill me," After glimpsing at their watch, they warily look up at a soaked Laney.
She glowers at (Y/N) with a crab in her hair.
"Oh, god."
The twins cowardly grin while (Y/N) runs away as fast as they can, as you do.
Next thing you know, Kin and Kon are buried mouth deep in sand.
The brother's screams are muffled as the crabs skitter toward them.
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Laney heavenly sighs.
She took (Y/N)'s suggestion and rented a swan boat.
The two enter a cave, "When you're in love, even doing nothing at all is wonderful."
Corey frowns, "I dunno. Feels more boring-"
"Shh-" She slaps a hand over his mouth, "Wonderful."
"BUMPER-SWANS!"
C̶o̶r̶e̶y̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶L̶a̶n̶e̶y̶ ̶s̶t̶r̶a̶i̶g̶h̶t̶ ̶d̶i̶e̶.̶
The twins ram into Corey and Laney with a cackling (Y/N) at the very front.
"C'mon, Lanes, we gotta catch'em!"
"Not romantic, Core."
"We could ram into them. . .together."
The two pairs of best friends float over.
"You aren't chasing us."
"Did we break your legs when we rammed you?"
"(Y/N), I thought you swan boat with Kon. That isn't swan boating," Laney slights.
"What do you mean? This is swan boating," Laney glares harder, "Well, swan boating is when you crash your swan into other swans."
She only sighs, "Core, can you ask your friends to leave us alone?"
"We're your friends too!" Kin snubs.
"Yeah, you ask us to leave you alone!"
"STOP RUINING THIS FOR ME!"
Corey frowns and leans into the spray painted swan.
"Uh, guys, can you. . .-"
"Ram you again?"
"Put flames on your boat?"
"Be awesome buds?!"
Corey pauses, "Leave us alone. . ."
"-Yeah, no. . .problem."
"Beep, beep, beep."
(Y/N) rubs their nape, "Is this my cue to get off?"
"Not now, ETD," Kin just shoves (Y/N) off the swan entirely.
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"Why don't you complement my hair?" Trina and Mina also swan boat.
"UHH Your hair is so great, Trina, it's like all highlights!"
"I'm talking to my new hoodie, Mina."
Trina laments, "Pinkcredible totally complemented my hair, this hoodie hides it."
"Well, maybe a sweater can't take the place of a best friend?"
"I probably just need time to bond with my new hoodie. Mina, privacy!"
Mina holds her nose and dives off the end.
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Wicked Sad Transition
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Corey and Laney, hand in hand, stroll into the garage, giggling.
"Well, well, well. Look who decided to come home."
"And without flowers!"
"Look, guys, we just needed some time to learn what love is, so we can fool Barney and his crazy daughter."
"And so we can nail our super cute duet."
"Duet?"
"You wanna play a gig/without us?"
Laney embraces Corey.
"When people are in love, they sing duets"
"It's uh like a rule."
"What happened to you guys?" Kin stands from his position on the couch, "This gig used to be about the music!"
"It was always about the cake."
Kin and Kon storm out of the garage.
"Bottom line: If we're out, we're all the way out!"
"Are we moving?"
"Moving? You don't even live here."
"Exactly!"
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"It's 3pm and I'm eating ice cream."
(Y/N) sits on a park bench with a cup of ice cream.
"Man, where did I go wrong?" They place the cup on top of the bench and lay on a handle.
"How should I know?" Ice Cream Tom stares down at the pre-teenager.
"Okay, but like Laney's so in love with the dude and my best friend's best friend is my worst frenemy! I'm alone in this! I go to bed waiting to go to band practice because I don't have anything else going on for me!"
"Kid, I'm not your therapist."
(Y/N) opens their eyes, "I thought you said you had a degree in Psychology."
"I have a degree in Photography and Culinary arts, now are you gonna pay for your ice cream or are you washing my utensils?"
(Y/N) was about to respond, but they feel a vibrate from their phone.
"Hold on, Ice Cream Tim-Thomas-whatever," They skim over a text of Kon wanting them to meet him at the Peaceville's park gazebo.
"Uhhh," (Y/N) quickly snatches the cup and runs off to the park.
"Get back here!"
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Kin looks up from his phone with wet eyes. (Y/N) walking over to him, eating ice cream.
Why's life so cruel?
"What are you doing here, coon-tail?"
"Kon texted me to meet him here, almost nice-guy."
Kin's pupils shrink.
"He didn't."
"What?"
"Well, Kon sent me a text to meet him here too."
The two stare in an uncomfortable silence.
Kin mutters as (Y/N) sat next to him.
"Don't you have any other emo friends?"
"Sorry that I don't really hang out with anyone that's not Kon."
"Seriously?"
(Y/N) grimly chuckles, "Do you hear the hipsters and goths yelling, 'Poser!' in the halls?"
"Apparently I like life too much."
"So you tease me because you have nothing else to do?"
"Hell no. It's cause you annoy me to no end!"
(Y/N) places an empty cup onto a lower step and they leer at the fresh grass. They hike their legs to their chin.
Kin leans back onto the gazebo ground. He observes the empty park and shifts his head.
"You probably don't wanna hear this from me, but I'm sorry you don't have many friends."
(Y/N) frowns. Their eyes flicker, but they wouldn't let Kin see.
"Thanks."
They tilt their head on the gazebo post.
"What've you been crying over?"
"Corey and Laney."
"We quit the band because they wanted us to leave them alone," Kin rolls his eyes.
"Now, that I say it, it sounds kinda stupid. But Laney was getting so worked up over it!"
(Y/N) looks back.
"S'cause she really likes Corey."
"Oh."
"Oh."
"Mhm."
Kin looks at Kon's text again. He really got tricked into this?
He click his phone off and smiles.
It's nice like this.
Peaceful, no one else but them.
(Y/N) holds the post and stands.
"Wanna get outta here, Kujira?"
Kin sighs as he closes his eyes and pumps his legs up.
"Yeah, okay, (L/N)."
The two walk off the gazebo, side by side.
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Trina sobs into her sleeves as she looks through photographs of Pinkcredible.
"Should I make sweater noises?"
Corey and Laney sit on the stage.
"So, what should we have in our duet?"
"A total lack of keyboard," Corey glances at Kin's piano which now has gathered a spider web.
"Well, I want," Her eyes quickly peer at Kon's drum set, "No drums at all nor a weird techno twang," She looks away from (Y/N)'s mixtable launchpad.
"What's happened to us?"
Laney offers a hand on Corey's shoulder, "I think we let something get away in our friendship."
"True/Fake love."
"I just really wanted this gig!"
"And I just really wanted," She looks at Corey again. He sniffs and tear rolls down his face.
". . .The gig. . .as well."
Trina's cries burst through the garage, "PINKREDIBLE! I can't believe I threw you away!"
"I'm fixing my makeup and getting you back!"
Corey's eyes light up.
"That's it! We need to get something back too!"
"Three somethings. Named (Y/N), Kin, and Kon."
"So whata we do?"
"We need lyrics about lost love, and I know just where to find some."
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"Okay, be cool. You're too good for her," Trina teases her hair and snaps her compact shut.
"MINA! Garbage picking!"
Mina picks her head out from the garbage can and shakes her head.
She gasps and dives into the can herself.
"Pinkcredible, where are you!?"
"That sure is the perfect sweater for you, Lanes!"
Trina pokes her head out.
"Thank you, Corey! I thin me and this pink sweater will be together forever!"
Trina's eyes latch onto the fuzzy sweater.
"Pinkcredible, what are you doing?!"
Corey smirks, "Look's like she's moving on," He leans, "But you didn't want her anyway, right?"
Trina's frown wavers. Tears well up in her eyes as storming clouds gather around the melancholic teen.
"Oh, Pinkcredible, I never should have let you go."
She slips out from the green hoodie and trash falls from her hair.
Trina ascends into the storm, her hair damp. Illusions of her sweater dance around her fancifully. Her diary and pen swivel into her two hands.
Thunder clouds rise from the words that bestow her. Lightning strikes to burn the hoodie for good.
Trina holds out her pen to drip, drip, drip.
She shuts her eyes and falls back into the garbage.
The diary slams onto Laney's head and into Corey's hands.
"Got it! Let's hit that wedding!"
"Goodbye, itchy sweater," Laney throws Pinkcredible into a nearby can.
"GASP! You're my best friend, Pinkcredible!"
_____________________________________
"I wish I was 25% polyester."
_____________________________________
"Can you believe, Corey's text?!" Kin grumbles and shoves his phone into (Y/N)'s face. A (Y/N) who was wearing a clip-on-tie.
"HAH! 'At least show up for some cake'. Cake and pensiveness. What a great evening."
"What a jerk!" Kon throws his hands up, "And when do we eat it?" He stops when he sees Corey and Laney holding hands.
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"Okay, make me puke from love or you ain't gettin' on that stage!"
"Well, in one day, we picnicked in the park, strolled on the beach, shared a milkshake, and went through the tunnel of love."
Barney glares harder.
"AND we were so in love that we ignored our friends, broke up the band, and had a fight! Over nothing!"
Barney has tears in his eyes before he puked into his hat.
"Sounds like love to me! Hit the stage yous crazy kids!"
"Yes!"
_____________________________________
"This one goes out to some very special people."
The guests awe and coo Barnera and her husband.
"Our best friends."
"(Y/N), Kin, and Kon."
The three gasp as a spotlight is put on them
_____________________________________
Corey: There used to be a love between us
Laney: Then suddenly that love was gone
Corey: Now everywhere I turn, you're missing
Laney: Like a hairless cat, it feels so wrong
Corey: I let we be about me
Laney: And I let us fall apart
Corey: Wrong is what I know I'll always be
Laney: Can we de-end and restart
Both: Please come back. Please come back.
Corey: My life without you ain't worth jack
Laney: I threw you away
Corey: Like a pile of old stuff
Laney: I'd take all the blame
Both: But I've had enough. I'm nothing without you. Well maybe not nothing but a whole lot less. It's true.
_____________________________________
The twins embrace each other and Kon holds (Y/N)'s hand.
Corey and Laney wait for a reaction.
The three cry and laugh as they hug with Corey and Laney.
"We'll never be apart again!"
Bake Barnera squeezes her husband, "Now, that is love!"
In fact, she squeezes him enough to pop.
Butterflies were in this man.
Excuse me?
Huh?
What?
What the hell?
"So beautiful!"
Grojband smiles at each other.
Barney runs up to the band.
"Yous guys are welcome to play at any of our daughter's weddings!"
The five glance at Barney's daughter's in bridesmaid dresses.
"Thanks, Barn, but maybe weddings aren't our thing after all?"
Corey shoves cake down his throat, "You know what they say about love, when you got it on the inside, yourghfon the outside. No matter how much love you have, there's never enough!"
"Core, those would have made into some perfect lyrics."
The rest of Grojband nod their heads.
Corey swallows the frosting.
"Thanks for coming out everyone!"
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(A/N)There's a reason for why I use the word frenemy