It was strange that after such a traumatizing and exhausting day, I was unable to sleep. I sat against Jacob's bed, listening to him breath. The morphine drip was gone in short time and he soon began to move about uncomfortably.
I still felt a little dizzy if I tried to stand up, so I just turned on my side and rested my arms on the bed and watched as he woke up.
Jacob furrowed his brow and groaned a bit. "This sucks."
I choked a laugh. "Yeah, it does."
He turned his head to face me. "I didn't mean to get hurt."
"Well, don't get hurt again you, you, stupid, idiotic... cheese bucket!" I croaked. I tried to stifle my tears, but a few squeezed out anyway.
Jacob was in a full body wrap with only one arm movable. He touched my face and wiped the tears away. "Cheese bucket?"
I just shook my head. "I was so scared. I thought I was going to die."
Earlier in the day, I had been in a bit of shock, and hadn't felt the full effect of fear. But now, I was feeling the fear.
"I thought you were dead. But I don't want to think about it."
I closed my eyes and leaned my head on the bed. "I just want life to be normal now."
"Agreed. In some ways, Bella being one of them and leaving will solve some problems." Jacob whispered.
True, but that didn't make it any nicer.
Jacob coughed. "When I thought you were dead, my life stopped. It was only for a second, but I thought of all the thing I wanted to do with you and that could never happen. I thought of our wedding, and our kids, and of our life together. For a second I thought it would never happen."
If my tears had been stifled before, they weren't now. I turned into a water hydrant and tears streamed down my face.
"What's wrong?" He asked gently, his voice a little pained.
I shook my head, but that caused a headache to begin. "Nothing. I don't know why I'm crying."
Jacob laughed softly. "It'll be fine though. I'll get better, we'll grow up a bit, I'll marry you, and we'll have six kids and they'll be the best ever."
"Six? That might be pushing it. Maybe four." I teased back, my smile a little watery.
"Yeah, lets hold that thought."
I leaned up and kissed him softly on the lips. "I love you Jacob Ephraim. And never forget it."
"When anyone else calls me my full name I am in trouble, but when you do it I love it." Jacob murmured.
"Mmm."
"I love how you always call me Jacob. Everyone shortens it to Jake, but I kinda like how you say it." His free hand caught mine and he played with my fingers.
"I'll say your name more often then, Jacob."
I did always call him Jacob. I liked the way it sounded and he never seemed to mind, so I just kept doing it. Now that I knew he liked it I would always feel happy when I said his name.
Jacob sighed. "Besides kids, I do want to spent my life with you. However you want me. Doing whatever we want."
I closed my eyes again, tears dried up. "I would like that. I don't know what I want to do. I like taking pictures, but how can I make a living off of that?"
"Lots of people don't 'make a living'. Anyway you can take wedding pictures or something." He said tiredly.
"That's not a bad idea actually. I could maybe take some courses for it. What about you? Will you open a shop?" I could imagine him working on cars and trucks in a cute little garage.
Jacob cracked a grin. "Yeah, I hope so. Embry and Quil will help me, and maybe we can get some of the younger guys helping too."
"The shop can be called the Big Bad Wolves." I teased.
Jacob glared. "No. Not funny."
"It kind of is." I snickered.
He rolled his eyes. They landed on my right wrist where I still wore the promise bracelet. He fingered the band. "I still mean this promise."
I bit my lip. "Yeah."
Jacob gripped my hand tighter. "I mean it. I'm not going anywhere. After I'm better you'll have to order me away. You'll need help with that ankle anyway. I do whatever you need."
I smiled. "Thanks." I thought for a minute. "Quil is going to have to wait for Claire. He'll stay looking this age for years while we grow older. It'll be strange in some ways."
"We'll manage. He'll want to grow with her, so he will keep phasing until she is sixteen or so. Maybe a bit older." Jacob said.
"Bella's gonna be eighteen forever." I sighed.
He frowned at me. "You don't want the same right?"
I lurched upright and then immediately put my head back in the bed as it spun. "No. I want to grow old and grey with you. But it's a little sad. She won't ever change."
Jacob nodded. "Yeah, I'll stop phasing when it's time and we'll grow old. I'll look awesome though."
"Are you insinuating that I won't?" I stared flatly at him.
"No. Not at all. You'll look amazing. I'll just be even better looking." Jacob winced in pain, and I realized that he was still healing and should probably sleep.
"Shh, just sleep. You'll need it if you want to look great when you are old."
He humphed a bit. "What about you? Have you slept?"
I shook my head. "I haven't. I don't know if I can."
"I'll be here. Not able to go anywhere anytime soon." Jacob sighed. He lay back and closed his eyes. "Sleep."
I loosened my hand from his and gingerly lay down. My head throbbed a little and my ankle was very sore. I slipped into an uneasy rest where my dreams were wild, but fortunately not nightmares.
I woke around six and found Jacob already awake. He grunted as I sat up. "Did you have a nightmare?"
I rubbed my neck. My head still hurt and I leaned over to the night table where Carlisle had left pain killers. "No actually. But I had a weird dream. We were in the cowboy time, and Dad was the sheriff and I was wearing a dress. You were an Indian riding a horse. You had full on paint and long hair. Then we were us again but we were swimming in the ocean and turned into fish, like Nemo. I liked being a fish, it was kind of cool. And then we were on a boat and you hit me with a pool noodle and I pushed you into the jellyfish tank. Then I woke up."
"Huh. I wouldn't want to be in your head while sleeping. I might go dizzy." Jacob said. His voice was a little rough from pain and lack of sleep.
"Oh, well, as least Edward isn't around to see them. Or maybe it's too bad, cause if he did see them maybe I could make him dizzy." I popped two pills and swished them back with some water. I once again propped myself against the bed and looked at Jacob.
Jacob snorted. "I dunno if that would work. He said you were foggy."
I frowned. "You were sleeping."
He shook his head and winced. "Nah, I woke up when I heard you talking. After you fell asleep we talked a bit."
My eyes widened. That must have been an interesting conversation. Jacob hated bloodsuckers in general and didn't like Edward at all.
He continued on. "It was rather... interesting. I learned some things. For a vampire, he's not as bad as he could be. We'll never be friends, but I think we aren't enemies any more."
"Huh, that's good." I acknowledged. Rather strange if you asked me, but Jacob didn't elaborate further.
I yawned. The past week had been pretty messed up in terms of sleeping. I was not ready to sleep again though and was perfectly content to lie awake with Jacob.
We quietly talked about everything and anything, from trivial nothings to life plans. It got a little mushy when we started telling what we loved about the other person, but I loved it.
An hour later Jacob proclaimed that he was hungry. He was still immobile and his dad wasn't up yet, so that meant I had had to find him something that had could eat both in bed and that he didn't have to chew too much.
I carefully tried to stand up and once I was on my right foot I leaned against the wall. It wasn't too bad, but my head pounded just a bit.
"You know, we still have those crutches from a couple years ago. I think they might be in the garage though." Jacob said.
I snorted. "Right, we have me, unable to walk properly, and you, unable to move, and your dad, who rarely goes out to the garage alone. We'll have to wait for someone a bit more able bodied."
I shuffled and hopped to the kitchen, holding to the wall and furniture as I went. Any pressure, even the slightest tap, I put on my left foot caused my ankle to throb.
I found some food but was then faced with the challenge of getting it to the bedroom without dropping any or without falling over. I managed fine, but I could quickly tell that this broken ankle business would get very old very fast.
Snick. Snick. Snick.
My dark curls fell to the floor. Though I was sad that my hair was shorter than I normally wore it, I was happy that is was one length again. The six inch difference between the right and left sides of my hair had been very distracting and annoying.
Now, thanks to Sue's skilled hands, my hair ended just above my collarbone. I stared at myself in the mirror for a second before smiling at Sue.
"Thank you. You really don't know how much I appreciate this." I said.
Sue squeezed my shoulder warmly. "Sweetie, you've been like another daughter to me for so long. I couldn't do anything but help you."
She trailed off but then a half grin appeared on her face. "And I couldn't leave you to Sam. He used to cut the packs hair when they turned. Suffice to say, they were glad to ask me to fill that roll."
I laughed as I thought of the shabby haircut that Jared sported when I first met him and then the much tidier haircuts that followed later in the year. "Yeah, I wouldn't trust anyone but you to do this."
I pushed myself up, using the bathroom counter for balance and grabbed the crutches that Sue had brought in from Jacob's garage.
I hobbled to the kitchen table where Billy sat with Leah, who looked kind of stiff. Her eyes flicked to my hair and an odd expression that I couldn't place crossed her face.
"Thanks for the clothes." I offered as a greeting to Leah. I still had a hard time knowing what to say or how to act around her now. I had been friends with her a little, but now I hung out with Emily a fair bit too, and I didn't want to hurt either of them. And Leah hadn't been very approachable recently.
She nodded shortly and frowned. "Can I talk to you? Alone?"
I raised an eyebrow and leaned in my crutches a bit more. "Okay, sure. What about?"
Leah grimaced. Billy and Sue got the message and disappeared from the kitchen. Jacob was still asleep in his room and with no other wolves around, our conversation should be mostly private.
Leah was silent for a moment before frowning. "I'm sorry."
"Okay, what for?" I asked, a little confused.
To my surprise, Leah just sighed. "Nothing... and everything. I'm sorry that I've been mean to you. It's not your fault this has all happened. And I'm sorry that you and Jake got hurt."
I shuffled to the table and sat down. I had been standing for a while and my head didn't feel amazing. "It's okay. It's not your fault. It was the vampires fault."
Leah stood and made her way to the door but paused. "Liana, umm, if you need help with anything... I can help you. You might want more than a bunch of bumbling males around you." She finished with half a smile but then ducked out the door.
That conversation was rather uncharacteristic for the current Leah, but was more in line with the Leah before Sam broke up with her.
I hoped that it meant that Leah was healing. That she was moving forward. Either way, it was nice to see a glimpse of the old her, no matter how brief.