lovely - lams (✔)

chapter forty

*Posted February 17th, 2021.

*tw: mentions/depictions of (child) cancer

Alexander Hamilton

"Alex, the plane tickets came in the mail today!" John called as soon as he walked in our apartment.

I'd completely forgotten that John and his father had (mostly) made up and, and that we were going to travel to South Carolina during the first week of August to visit his family. Our trip was only a couple of weeks away. John's father had purchased our plane tickets.

"Awesome." I said, standing up from my place on the couch to greet John. He engulfed me in a hug.

John kissed me on my cheek, "I'm so excited to visit. I'm gonna be completely honest, I never thought my dad'd let me back home. It hasn't even been that long since I came out."

I pulled away from the hug, "I'm happy that he came around. For the most part anyway."

"Yeah, me too." John said with a shrug, "I mean, I know he'll never be okay with me being gay, but I don't mind. So long as I can see my brothers and sisters."

"I get what you mean." I replied, "I obviously never came out to my family, but I'm glad that you can still see yours."

John gave me another quick hug before pulling away and heading to the kitchen, "I'm thirsty." He announced.

"Then drink water." I replied with a chuckle. I sat back down on the couch with my laptop and began typing again.

John soon returned with a water bottle and sat next to me on the couch, "Are you nervous to meet everyone?"

I sighed and stopped typing, "A little. I'm mostly just nervous about your dad. I doubt he'll like me."

"You never know." John said, taking my hand in his free one, "But I'm sure my siblings will love you. They're cool. At least they were the last time I saw them." John laughed.

I chuckled, too, then regained my composure, "It's just gonna be weird. I haven't been in a family setting for like... God, I can't even remember the last time I was in a family setting."

I took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. Thinking about being with John's family kind of freaked me out. Families just... made me nervous. And sad.

John kissed the back of my hand, "It's gonna be alright. I love you."

I felt myself smile, "I love you, too."

Then, it was quiet. I focused on my breathing, and on John's breathing. It was a calm, comfortable moment.

"I'm gonna make something to eat. I'm hungry." John said, standing up and ultimately letting go of my hand, "Did you eat yet?"

I began typing and didn't otherwise respond.

"That's a no." John said with a short laugh, "What do you want to eat?"

"I'm not too hungry." I said.

"Nerves?" John asked.

"Yep." I simply answered.

"Well, I'm still gonna make you something." John said before repeating: "What do you want to eat?"

"I don't know." I replied, "Surprise me. Nothing too filling though, I don't want to puke."

John laughed again, "Sounds good." He then playfully muttered under his breath as he began to walk away, "What are we gonna do with you?"

-----

Today was the day. Our flight was at two p.m., it was currently eight in the morning.

"Okay, double check to make sure you have everything. You finished packing last night, right?" John said, stumbling over his words. He was nervous to say the least.