Shut Up & Listen

chey & sadé: a commentary

Sadé

"The mall is closing in fifteen minutes. Please make your final purchases at this time."

Cheyenne and I joined the long line at the department store behind a man who favored Dame. I was looking at him because obviously he's my type, tall dark, the right type of fade. I love to ogle fine ass niggas, especially when they ogle me back. The way this nigga's teeth sparkled when he opened his mouth to say, "how you doing, ma" almost made me blush. I'm pleasant, of course I said hey back.

"Damn, sis. You thirsty?"

I rolled my eyes and looked at Cheyenne, smirking a little bit. Then I shook my head and looked down where all I could see what my big ass belly. "Register number four please." An analog voice said over the intercom for us to come up to the register. I could feel Chey watching me, and I already knew what we were gonna talk about as soon as we get out of here.

Our hands now full of bags from the mall, we are walking across the crosswalk and she chuckled a little bit which made me look at her because previously, neither of us had said anything.

"Girl, what?"

"Nothing, just..." she started, still cheesing. I shook my head at her dramatically urging her to continue. "what's the real on you and Damon?" She asked, closing the trunk. We separated to get into the car and she waited for me to respond. I took my time. The longer I took, the sadder her eyes grew. "What's wrong, Cheyenne?" I asked, lowkey irritated by her constantly changing moods. "We together... but it's like... complicated or whateva." I said, watching her emotional ass be emotional.

"Oh my God, sus? What is wrong?" She wiped her eyes with her jacket sleeve and rolled her eyes.

"Imma need you to take a deep breath alright? And chill, sus. What's going on? I mean, I know I've only known you for less than day, but ion know anybody who goes from spinnin' and grinnin' to tears as much as you do... or as quick as you do, girl. Are you okay?"

She started the car and pulled out of the spot in silence. I watched her face lighten back up when W.A.P. started playing on the radio. I raised my brows at her and my eyes circled the proximity, full of confusion, when she raised her hand in the air with her tongue out. "um." I looked down at my lap then back at her before covering my forehead with my palm. I waited until the moment was over and the song was long passed before I spoke again. Chile.

"What about you and Cecil? Y'all not together, right?" I asked out of curiosity.

"Right." She said simply.

"Well are y'all still messin' around?"

"No." She said but the way she said it, I know she's lying. How y'all be around eachother that much, two fine ass human beings and ain't still attracted to eachother? "How come?" I asked.

"The hell I look like having another baby by that nigga?" She looked back at me with low eyes, "straight stupid." She rolled her eyes and ran right through a red light. "He don't even take care of the one we have and I'm-" she cut herself off.

I raised by brow but kept my mouth shut because she don't know me and I don't want to overstep. I looked out the window to avoid the upcoming tension and changed the subject. "Them chemtrails big as hell, its gone rain tomorrow." I shook my head and took out my phone to record them. "Kisha, look at these big ass chem trails out here in the D girl! They poisoning niggas all over the damn country. This shit prolly got the rona all in it." I pressed send and looked back over at Chey who seemed to have calmed down. "Chey." She looked at me for a second then put her attention back on to the road. "If you want to talk, I'm a good listener. I won't even respond if you don't want me to." She stayed quiet.

"Come on girl, I ain't tryna spend all my time with them crackbaby ass niggas Dame keep around while I'm here so we gone have to get to know eachother better, friend. Gone head and get comfty wit me nah."

"I lied."

"I know."

"I'm just so fucking stupid to keep fucking with his ass. Yeah... I'm honestly embarrassed that I like this nigga even after he be ghosting me and our kid for months at a time."  She started and cut the volume of the radio. "Honestly fuck him and his unpredictable, unstable ass... but every time he come around, I be acting like I ain't got shit to be mad about." Chey said, putting all her attention on the road.

"Sound like you love him."

"No." She demanded almost instantly, before I could even finish the last word of my sentence. "Okay, I'm lying but I can't. I can't be in love with his selfish ass, Sadé. But he's been trying and I gotta appreciate that right?"

"Tuh." I said rolling my neck a little bit." You ain't gotta appreciate shit sus. And loving him don't make you stupid."

"But laying with him does."

I let out a frustrated breath and looked over at her again before putting my chin in my hand. "I get it boo. Just be patient with yourself."

The ride was quiet until we eventually pulled into the driveway of Dame's crib. I rolled my eyes when I saw two extra cars in front of the house. "Shiiiiid, i'm too tired to be bothered by that Cole nigga. That mutha is off his damn rocker, the fuck?" I complained to Chey before she cut off the car.

"You know I think he be high. But, I only ever been around him for a few days at a time so, I can't really say."

"A few days? Girl, I was in the room with dude for five minutes and was ready to karate chop him in his damn thoak." I almost yelled, rolling my neck again, making Chey crack up.

"I'm done with you, you crazy."

"I'm dead ass. I don't know what the fuck it is with these Detroit niggas, but they dumb as hell. Aint none of them got momma's and they reckless like the fuck is going on? The fuck is really going on here?"

"I fucking swear." Chey laughed, taking the keys out of the ignition. I called Dame and waited for him to answer the phone which took way too many rings for my liking. He finally answered the phone.

*one sided phone call*

"Can you come help me bring these bags in? My feet are killing me."

"The fuck you at? Your car is in the driveway."

"Whhyyyy would I ask them to carry my bags? They're not my man."

I hung up and rolled my eyes letting out a loud breath.

"Ooooh. See this is the shit i'm saying, man."

"What he say?" Chey asked.

"Talking 'bout , 'Cole and 'em at the house, one of them can help you.', like...the fuck? And where are you? Am I trippin' orrr."

"Girl, i'll help you, we don't need no half stepping ass niggas."

"And that's on what?"

"Period." we said in unison.

12/10/2020