[ Bonus ]

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why yall are rereading this book 😭😭

lmao so hi, this book has been up for AGES man. its so cringy i dont even wanna see it lmao,, but thanks to you all its almost at 900k 🥺❤️ so tysm for that i appreciate all of you that vote and comment, and i hope you all stay safe at home and have a merry christmas season,,

basicallys thats what i wanna say so here's a bonus christmas chapter just because I felt like it lmaoo okok also my writing skills are a bit eh so yea 😭

[ December 24 ; Friday ]

Pain.

All you felt was pain. Excruciating, eternal, never-ending pain. It tugged in your heart, in your chest, in your mind. It enveloped you wholly and with it your whole sanity, parts of them, that were left ever since you and Yoongi got married. It was an awful experience.

bad experience, didn't like it. I do not recommend 3/10

You suited up in a dark grey Pajamas and plain white shirt, you tied up your hair just for the fact that it'll prevent you from breaking down with sticky tears and hair in your face good enough that'll ease you of the excruciating pain you were currently feeling. You set the basket of fruits that you were holding on a random hospital bed you saw in the hallway. You bent down to your knees and hugged them and in front of the Room 309's door and in the hallway you cried for 30 minutes, just to get back up and hide your tears.

You wiped your tears and knocked on the door. You entered, and just like a puppy, Yoongi, greeted you by removing his IV and running to you, that led you to approach him faster.

"Don't remove your IV" you scolded him while leaving the basket on his bedside table.

You kissed his forehead lovingly and trailed your fingers on his delicate pale white face. He was speechless, at moments like these, you really do take his breath away, literally and figuratively.

"Sorry I was late, there was traffic—" You said as you prepared the knife and the apple you were about to peel when he cut you off.

"I know" he replied smiling like an idiot as if, he isn't going to surgery in 3 hours.

"So you knew I was here 30 minutes ago?" You mumbled to him, while continuously peeling the apple.

"Yeah" he looked down, hands clasped, still smiling like an idiot puppy getting caught eating ice cream.

Chocolate Ice cream, that is. You thought

"How could you not tell me" you whispered, tears falling down your eyes like glass, precious gems from the sky.

"No no no no no don't cry" he said immediately grabbing your head to place on his chest, a ritual you both got accustomed to after having your worst fight, 3 months after getting married.

"H-how could you die and and not tell me that" you cried out in between hiccups. "And it's fucking Christmas you" you continued. "You asshole"

You refused to be held like that, and he was surprised. You never refused a chest head hug, never once. No matter what happened, whose fault it was, or what consequences happened, never did both of you refused a hug. Did you not want him anymore, were you planning on leaving him, did the relationship nothing, did your marriage mean nothing, did all those sex mean nothing to you now? Were you gonna leave him and let him die into an eternal abyss of emptiness and loneliness once you find another guy that made you so happy. Did you find the guy? Is there a guy? It must've been a small guy. You like submissive men, surely it's a smaller built guy. Were you meeting in secret? Were you dating already, were you getting married and leaving him now WERE YOU?

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