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Draco was going to be heading back to the manor almost every weekend, sometimes during the week too during the new term. It's hard to focus on classes at all with the tensions rising. I wasn't even going back to the manor with him and I felt it.

Daphne was back now though which made his absence more bearable since I had someone to talk to. As we sat in the common room Friday night after our first week of classes back we talked about the rest of our breaks.

She told me about her parents and that were still fighting for her to marry the old geezer, she wasn't backing down though. Then I got to share my fun news with her that I have no idea who my dad is which doesn't sound bad until you say one of the options is literally Voldemort.

"Damn." She said softly as we sat on the same couch. It was fairly late so there was no one there as we shared our life problems. "We got shit" she giggled lightly, as did I.

"For real" as I said that the door leading to the corridor opened. Allowing one Pansy Parkinson to strut in. I tried to keep in my audible groan.

"Hey Greengrass" she looks at Daphne and sends a wave then her gaze meets mine. She said nothing but raises her eyebrow before leaving to her dorm.

"Wow she really hates you huh?" Daphne said amused.

"The feeling is mutual." I said through gritted teeth. "She won't leave Draco alone it's infuriating"

"I sense some hostility in your voice..." she smirks. "Is there something that has progressed in your relationship?" She teased.

I was silent for a moment.

"So you're going to tell me your daddy issues but you won't spill the dirt on your relationship?" Daphne said with sass I couldn't help but let out a loud laugh.

"My gosh, okay my bad." I said readjusting my seat. "We um... may have gotten a bit.. closer.." I hesitated. She raised her eyebrows again, telling me to elaborate. "We just kissed okay... a few times. It's no big deal" I said shrugging but a big smile grew on her lips.

"No big deal? How was it? We're they hungry kisses or passionate kisses or-?"

"Daphne!" I threw the pillow behind my back at her.

"What I want details!" She still had a big grin on her face.

"Well we've kissed a few times. But there all pretty... passionate. It ranged from sweet to 'hungry' I suppose" I scoffed copying her words. "I don't know how to explain it." My cheeks were glowing red, I could tell by the heat I felt that wasn't coming from the fire. I didn't want to embarrass myself by saying what I felt which was that every time we kissed it felt like we'd been waiting for each other forever, or that the world stops even when his face is inches away from mine. That butterflies have been in my stomach for months but I've been pushing them away hoping that I won't get hurt.

"You're so cute together. I knew you'd get past the friendship level of your relationship."

"Well, Stick two people into close quarters it's bound to happen." Which is true. Sometimes I felt like I couldn't decipher if my feelings were real or just an infatuation, even though I knew I was just trying to down play what I felt.

There was a soft silence as we listened to the crack of the fire. "Have you thought about the war at all?" I asked her continuing to stare into the fire rather than back at her.

"What about it?" She asked lightly.

"What... side you want to be on?" That's when I looked back at her she has an unsure look on her face. "I don't like the side I'm on" I said softly.

"I know what you mean.. I don't like that side either.." she looked at her hands.

"Do we fight? Against our families?" Against Draco, my thought continued. My voice was barely audible at this point.

"I don't know what to do.." she gave me a soft look.

"What side is Katie on?" I asked her.

"The Order" I nodded. "It makes sense." She let out a sigh.

"Will I ever get to meet her?" I asked trying to lighten the mood that I dampened.

"Yeah, maybe you can come to a secret rendezvous of ours one time"  Her soft smile grew.

"Tell me about her" I asked trying to get away from the conversation I started. Her eyes lit up at my words and her smile grew even wider. I leaned my head against the couch as she spoke.

"We met last year. She was my tutor for transfiguration. McGonagall paired me with her since she was a year older and I guess 'had the extra time' we got really close. I thought we were just good friends but it changed when she ended up in the hospital. I think it was a wake up call for both of us. Luckily we both realized what we felt was more than that, it only took her life almost being lost to figure it out." Her smile faded slightly at the thought of it. "She was supposed to graduate last year but she missed so much time in the hospital she had to stay back, lucky me I get more time with her I guess" she giggled lightly.

She continued telling me everything about her, even the things I didn't necessarily need to know like her favorite animal or favorite color. Her smile didn't leave her face the rest of the time she spoke.

She's in love and it's so easy to see. I can't wait until she gets to run away with this girl and never look back.

As I got up to go to bed I gave her a tight hug.

"I honestly don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you here Daph. You're keeping me sane" I said trying to hold my tears back but laughing lightly. She squeezed me tighter.

"I'm so happy you came" she whispered back.

As I walked back to my room I thought a lot about everything.. literally everything. How much different my life is now than in was just 5 months ago. How much I've lost but how much more I gained.

Draco.

I can't imagine fighting opposite him in this war, because I know he doesn't have a choice on what side he wants. I don't necessarily have a choice either. But I can't imagine fighting for Voldemort, I hate the idea of it.

I also know that fighting opposite them means my death. My moms death. Possibly even his death.

I groaned loudly as I flopped onto the bed. Staring at the ceiling for a moment before I heard a knock on my door. Confused, I got up and walked over. Cracking it enough to stick my head out.

The audacity.

"Is Draco here" Pansy smiled twirling her black hair in her fingers.

"That's not your business" I tried to close the door but she stopped me.

"I just want to chat with him." She gave me a smirk.

"How many times do you have to embarrass yourself before you get the hint? He's taken" I hiss.

"Not by choice" she sneered.

"Sorry to tell you Parkinson, if he really wanted to leave me for you he would have by now. I'd watch yourself if I were you especially if you try to pull this desperate shit again. Goodnight." I gave her a sarcastic smirk and shut the door in her face to stop myself from punching her in the throat.

"We'll see about that" she yelled through the door. I was so close to going after her in that moment. Hexing her. Punching her. Anything. But I took a deep breathe, that's not me. I don't fight, but damn does she make it so hard.

My frustration with her is on the last straw. If she pulls anything else, I don't think I'll be able to hold back next time.

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