Arts of Heart (Compilation of OSS)

ART 110

ANGEL IN DISGUISE

I was 21 when Jan started to court me. Everyone finds me lucky for having a suitor like him--kind, smart, and handsome. Honestly, I had a little crush on him that time but it wasn't enough reason to easily fall for him.

Niligawan niya ako sa loob ng anim na buwan hanggang sa ibigay ko sa kaniya ang matamis kong 'oo'. I could clearly see how happy he was that he even shouted "yes" infront of many people. Hanggang sa gumaraduate kami ay naging matatag ang aming relasyon.

"Will you marry me?"

It was our 3rd anniversary when he asked me to marry him. Sobrang saya ko dahil nahanap ko na ang taong makakasama ko habang buhay.

Nagpakasal kami at tumira sa iisang bubong. Our life was almost perfect. He had a stable job that can support all my neccessities while I was staying at home, doing my responsibility as his wife.

-
"Magtrabaho na kaya ako, hon? Wala naman akong ginagawa sa bahay, eh," I asked him for a nth time.

His brows furrowed. "No. You stay here. It's my  responsibility as your husband," he answered, as always.

They envy me because I had a responsible husband. Jan doesn't want me to work. He would be mad at me whenever I force myself to do the things he didn't want.

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"Oh mommy, napabisita po kayo?" masayang bungad ko nang makita ang aking ama't ina sa aming bahay.

I immediately closed my eyes when I felt her warm hug. I missed them so much.

"Oo, sinabi kasi ng asawa mo sa akin na bisitahin ka namin dahil baka nabobored kana. How are you doing?"

"She's doing well, mom. Hindi ko siya hinahayaan mapagod. Nagkasakit lang siya nang tatlong araw kaya medyo pale siya," sabat ni Jan na nasa tabi ko na pala. He hugged me behind and kissed my hair. My smile became wide because of what he did.

"You are really lucky to your husband. Hindi ako nagsisisi na ipinaubaya ka namin sa kaniya. You never dissapointed us, my daughter. Thank you for that, Jan," my dad muttered.

My parents really want me for him eversince I introduced him to them. He's sweet, caring and thoughful man. My parents became more proud of me because I chose a responsible man.

-
Halos masuka ako nang makita ko ang paglapit ng isang babae sa aking asawa. We were at his friend's birthday party. Sa mga ganitong gathering lang ako nakakalabas kapag kasama siya.

Tumigil ako sa pagkain at matalim siyang tiningnan pero alam kong hindi niya ako nakikita dahil masaya siyang nakikipagtawanan sa babae. Kumuha siya ng desert para sa amin kaya wala siya sa tabi ko.

"Are you okay, Mrs. Ocampo?" one of his co-worker asked me so I let out a small smile to assure that I'm alright.

Naramdaman ko ang pag-upo sa tabi ko ni Jan pero hindi ko siya pinansin at nagpatuloy muli sa pagkain.

"Jan, hindi yata maganda ang pakiramdam ng asawa mo."

"I'm okay. Don't mind me," mabilis kong sagot.

Jan looked at me. There's a glint of worriedness in her eyes so I gave him a smile. Ipinulupot niya ang kaniyang kamay sa aking bewang bago bahagya iyong pinisil.

"Uuwi na tayo. Magpapaalam lang ako," bulong niya. Pipigilan ko na sana siya pero nakatayo na siya at pumunta sa birthday celebrant para magpaalam.

After a few minutes, agad din siyang bumalik. 

"Hmm, excuse me. Mauna na kami ah. Masama kasi pakiramdam ng asawa ko. I'm sorry," magalang niyang saad sa aming mga kasama sa table bago ako inalalayang tumayo. I smiled at them awkwardly.

Before we exit that place, I heard them talking about us. Hindi nakatakas sa aking pandinig ang pagpuna nila sa pagiging maalaga ni Jan.

Little did they know, it was just an act.

Marahas niya akong hinila papunta sa aming kwarto at padarag akong itinulak sa kama.

"What the fuck, Kyla! Anong kaartehan iyon? At doon ka pa talaga nag-inarte sa party. Wala ka talagang pinipiling lugar, ano?" Napapikit ako sa lakas ng kaniyang boses. Nakakatakot at nakakapanginig.

"At ikaw? Sayang-saya ka pang makipagtawanan sa babae mo! Akala mo ba hindi ko alam na nambabae ka? You are a cheater!" Hindi ko halos makilala ang sarili ko dahil ito ang unang beses na nasigawan ko siya.

Mabilis na lumipad ang kaniyang palad sa aking pisngi katulad nang madalas niyang gawin. Halos mahilo ako sa lakas noon.

"Hindi kana makakalabas ng bahay tandaan mo 'yan. I won't let your stupid parents visit you again. Karma mo 'yan sa kaartehan mo," malamig niyang wika habang dinuduro ako.

Nanlamig ako dahil doon kaya lumuhod ako sa harap niya at niyakap ang kaniyang tuhod. "No, please. I'm sorry, hon. Hindi na mauulit."

But he acted like he didn't hear me. He left me and locked me again in our room.

I love Jan so much that I could tolerate him to hurt me. I also don't want to dissapoint my parents bacause I choose a wrong man. 

Tuluyan na akong napahagulhol. I'm not lucky to have him because my life became hell when I married him.

He doesn't want me to work because he's afraid that I'll escape from him. Natatakot siyang makapagsumbong ako kaya palagi niya akong binabantayan. He knows every single move of mine.

He's just sweet when he's infront of my parents, acting like he's doing his responsibility as my husband.

He's just caring to me when everyone is watching. He loves hearing praises from other people.

He wasn't the old Jan anymore. Tama nga sila, 'tsaka mo lang makikilala ang iyong partner kapag alam niyang pagmamay-ari ka na niya. Sa loob ng 5 taon naming pagsasama, hindi ko pa pala siya kilala.

Not because people see us happy, we're doing good. We may look a perpect couple but behind those pictures were the bruises and wounds I always keep, not only in my body but also in my heart.

I am trapped in the arms of a devil who's acting like an angel.

So better find a better man and knows him well. Wait until his true color shows. 'Yong taong kilala mo ngayon, he's not yet him. There's also a devil inside him covering by his  admirable actions.

Don't find a man like Jan. Who's only good at the beggining and pretending. We deserve a man who'll protect us at any cost and not a man who'll just hurt us. We are a princess and not a pet.