F̶o̶l̶l̶o̶w̶ Fuck the Rulebook - Kenma Kozume

A cry for help - Chap 65

Akasuki didn't think the day could go any slower but somehow it had happened. She was already in her last class, nervously tapping her feet as her eyes were preying on the door. Was she ready to end the only real connection she has left to the boys?
"Akasuki," the teacher spoke, what?
She lifted her eyes to meet theirs, what did she do?
"Are you okay? Class ended, yet you're still here?" They frowned.
Class ended? Akasuki slowly glanced around the room noticing the silence,
"I guess, I should leave," she scooped her bag up heading towards the, the worrying thought of Damien's whereabouts bothering her.
"Hey," the teacher interrupted her moving around their desk to stare at her, "are you okay Akasuki?"
Okay? It would be a delight for her to be just, okay, in this moment, but she wouldn't know that feeling of blandness until Damien leaves. She nodded forcing a smile,
"of course."
The teacher narrowed their eyes at her,
"don't push yourself too hard, remember what happened last year."
Last year. The thought soaked into Akasuki's head,
"I won't," hastily leaving the room.
Last year won't be repeated. Not exactly if she can help it. She took a breath of air settling her lungs, looking down the empty corridors, she was scared of what was going to happen.
"Looking for someone?" A voice question making her jump from her place to the nearest wall.
Damien beamed at her feasting from the fear on her face,
"obviously not."
She never noticed him there. How was he so quiet? He held his arm out gesturing for her to come to him. She gritted her, she hated it, her feet moving towards him like a magnet. She hated feeling this weak. He draped his arm around her, leading them down the corridor. That's all she was, weak. She always has been. If there was one thing, she could've done to prevent this, what would it have been? Take Damien back? Never have ratted him out? Leave the city? What was it? When did she mess up? When was she,
"ready?" Damien asked sourly.
Ready? Akasuki lifted her head from the ground to the doors before her. The gym doors. The stupid wooden doors. Her cheeks began to burn as her thoughts flamed up; she should have never stepped through these doors. Not the first time, certainly not the second. A hand pushed up against her back as another gripped her cheeks, Damien's looming before hers,
"remember, you're replaceable," his words were like butter, seeping into her skin, "they don't need you, you," she felt her own lips move to finish his words, "aren't worth anything, to anyone."
That was it. Damien grinned bearing his pearly whites, that was what she had forgotten,
"perfect."
Perfect. His fingers loosened on her cheeks, both hands moving to push her towards the door, sliding the paper over her shoulder into her shaking hands. Just do this Akasuki, just do it. Get it over and done with. Her fingers wrapped around the cold handle, the beating of her heart aggressively tightening her chest. Why, why does it hurt so much? Her hand worked against her pulling the door open, bright lights rendering her sight useless. Were they always this bright? She took a step into the hall, the floor almost give way underneath her, fingers tightening around the door frame for support. Was it always this nerving? Her eyes began to focus, blurs forming figures upon the court, constructing the faces slowly. For the moment she watched them, she hadn't quite noticed it before. The smiling faces, frustrating yet excited yells, easy communications. The air slipped from her lungs as realisation had finally made its way home. Crumbling the paper in her fist, moving towards the small statue of the coach. How did she not see it before? She stopped moving as she stood behind the coach gritting her teeth, fingertips becoming white as she reached out with her other hand to tap the shoulder of the coach. It's so stupidly obvious. He turned slowly, his face rendering in Akasuki's sight. But why, why she getting so angry?
"Au, we haven't seen you in a while," her mouth clicked as her nerves were snapping fast, "is everything okay?"
Her eyes caught the expression of another behind the coach, a warm heart filled smile, are promises really meant to be kept?
"Do it Akasuki," Damien's voice was repeating in her mind, "if you do it, it'll all be over."
"Really? You would promise me that?" Akasuki wondered helplessly.
Damien nodded, his eyes shimmering in the early light,
"you know I wouldn't lie to you."
Lie? Damien's expression suddenly changed into another, the sight of blood trickling over his lips, eyes wide glowing red, sweat pouring down his face, what, what happened? His bruised hands lunged out gripping her shirt tightly, his face pressing against hers, with heavy breaths Damien growled,
"how dare you do that to me!" his fingers snaked up her chest to her shoulders, "you had to do one thing, one thing! Yet you fucked that up!" she felt the tightening of fingers around the base of her neck, his tongue sliding over his lips, "I should've done this the first time I had the chance."
One thing. One thing.
"Au?" Coach's voice spoke softly drawing her out from the past.
Just one thing, she can't fuck this up.
With a heavy breath, staggering her words, Akasuki held out the crumpled paper in her fist,
"I, can't do, this, anymore."
His eyes lowered her fist, carefully prying open her fingers to slid the paper out ensuring she wasn't harmed during the process. His eyes lingered over the words for a moment too long, Akasuki's eyes fluttering shut in fatigue.
"I will always be your world," Damien hissed, his fingers running over her cheeks to her lips, "you'll always be mine, I will always be on your mind," soft breath hitting her nose as he lowered his plush lips before hers, "they can lock me up for as long as they like, but you'll never," his lips pressed against hers, "replace me," his lips were yanked from hers as two muscled men in matching uniforms wrestled him to the nearest wall, his eyes connected to hers the whole time, smirking sadistically.
Replace. 
"Are you sure?" the coach asked quietly.
Upon opening her eyes Coach was watching her closely. Was she sure? She nodded pulling her open hand down to her side,
"I'll have the uniform washed and returned asap."
He tutted stretching his neck out,
"I understand," he shoved the paper under his arm holding out his hand, huh?
"It was nice to have you," he insisted, smiling widely.
Nice to have her? She furrowed her brows taking his hand reluctantly then pulling away immediately, turning around to face the exit. Tears beginning to grow in her eyes, since when did everyone start lying to her? Not even within taking her first step, a new voice filled her senses,
"You've got to be joking."
Joking? There was no mistaking that voice. Lev. Her lips parted yet no words came out. She's come this far, there's no going back.
"No, face me when you talk to me," Lev growled.
Her eyes closed, her breathing becoming rapid. Anyone would think after everything she's been through; a raised voice wouldn’t bother her. Yet, his completely shook her to the core. Even if she does manage to look at him, forming words seemed impossible.
"Lev calm down," Tora grumbled from a distance, "what's going on?"
What's going on? That surely was the question of the hour.
"Well," coach cleared his throat.
Don't you dare say it, Akasuki hissed, her heart twisting in her chest, her lips parting as a coarse broken voice left her lips,
"I quit," that's all she could get out.
It was the truth, was there any need for more? Anything else she said would be useless. Tears slid down her cheeks as a new voice cut in,
"I thought,"
"She's a coward," Lev hissed, his footsteps stomping further away.
A coward. Hm, some part of her liked the sound of that. She was a coward.
"Wow," Kuroo breathed out, "I thought,"
"Stop thinking," Yaku interrupted harshly, his footsteps becoming distant too.
Stop thinking. Yaku was right. A hand slowly landed on Akasuki's shoulder. Her body instinctively tensed up. No, she pulled away wiping the tears from her eyes and she turned to face the remaining members. Sō standing before her with his hand still in the position where her shoulder was, please.
"Don't touch me," Akasuki warned, she doesn't want her body to confuse their touch with Damien's.
"Suki," So whispered, his hand slowly closing falling to his side, brows softly furrowed from concern, "you're leaving us?"
Her eyes moved to the others stood behind Sō. Tora. Kai. Shōhei. Tamahiko. Yūki. Kuroo. The last was stood behind Kuroo, eyes peering out wide at her, disappointment laced into his brows.
"I'm sorry," Kenma, "I'm so sorry I couldn't stick to my promise," she spoke, her lips quivering as confusion spread on their faces except Kenma's.
She stepped back, Kuroo stepping forward, his face stern,
"Suki, if this is him,"
No, she had to cut him off right there,
"it's my choice," she took a few more steps back a tea sliding down her cheek, "don't worry about me, focus on the tournament," she forced a weak smile, "I’ll be mad if you don't win," reaching the exit, "bye guys," she pushed the door open, slamming the door shut as she let out a sob covering her mouth.
It hurts so much. Why? Nothing has ever hurt this much. Fuck. She clung onto her chest, fear filling her thoughts, is this, a hand on her cheek distracted her from the thoughts. 
"Keep doing as I say and they'll be untouched," Damien whispered leaning down to pressed his warm lips against her head, "go home and rest," pulling away strutting away from her, his figure fading into darkness.
She would've loved to yell please stay, don't leave me, literally anything that would've kept him there. But she couldn't form the words, the breath wouldn't replenish in her lungs. Her hands moved to her throat, finger tips pressing into the skin in attempt to break some air in.
"Suki, are you," she turned around her eyes blurring the face ahead of her as her fingers pried at her throat, "I, can't," their eyes widened their hands reaching out to grab hers.
No, please she couldn't breathe, she needed. Her head thudded against a solid object, shaking her sight, a quickening thump echoing through her ears.
"take your time," a whisper teased her heart, who, "it's okay," is it, Damien? No, "you're safe."
She felt her airways become free as she listened the beating of their heart, this was,
"You son of a bitch!" A growl erupted, a sudden object impacting Akasuki's solitude. 
What just, her body was yanked from the ground into the arms of another, what is happening? Her eyes dropped to the ground to see a small kitten, head down supporting its right side tenderly.
"I told you, if you ever touch her," the arms left her side reaching down to grab the kitten by its scruff, "I will crush you,"
No, this, this wasn't right, no. Her feet lunged forward before Damien, shielding the kitten with tears spilling down her face,
"I can't do this anymore!"
Everything, she couldn't do anything anymore.
"Suki," Kenma's voice whispered, frail golden eyes matching hers, "was this all a lie?"
A lie? What does,
"What do you think, fucking freak," Damein spat pushing against Akasuki's back in attempt to grab Kenma.
She tried to hold him back with her remaining strength, speaking through gritted teeth,
"can you just, give us a minute, I promise, after this, it'll stop."
It was as if her words were a lullaby to Damien's ears as the pressure stopped, the sound of footsteps decreasing.
"Tell me the truth," Kenma asked, the beg seeping into his quiet words.
Standing before him right now, Akasuki was convinced now.
"It’s not like we were a pair made in heaven," Akasuki spoke, her hands lingering by her side, "you should stop lying to yourself," she took a deep breath, "this way, things are better for you.”
Pure silence followed her words. Their eyes still connected. Why wasn't he speaking? His silence is worse than any possible word he could say. Her hand slowly lifted to hover beside his face, please just say,
"that's it?"
His words were simple yet effective, her heart crumbling. That's it. 
"You really just went through all of this for, what," he stepped back leaving her hand in the air, brows furrowed, red faced, "nothing?"
What was she meant to say? Yes, no, maybe? What was the right answer? A scoff slipped from his pale lips, his head lowering for a split second, maybe no answer was better than- his head lifted rapidly, face brighter than beetroot along with misty eyes, a frightful yell left his lips,
"Leave! Right now!" his palms hit her shoulders with a harsh softness.
Her eyes widened; she didn’t expect this. For Kenma to suddenly, flip.
"You broke the promise!" the promise, "never speak to me again!" his yells were becoming more frightful each second, "no, never speak to, my, team again!"
Her lips parted in attempt to communicate, eyes lifting to meet two pairs of eyes watching from the gym door. Yūki. Sō. Kenma's right. She tightened her lips, carefully reaching out to brush Kenma's messy mane behind his ear. Even when he's angry at her, she knew his intentions were good. His arm smacked her hand away rapidly,
"Get out! We don't need you!"
Need. They really didn't need her.
"You're right," Akasuki spoke stepping back from Kenma's furious rage, looking at what she's done.
His eyes widened at her words, trying to hide his content. Her eyes softened as she stared at Kenma's flustered face,
"I know you'll look after them," she took another step lifting her eyes to catch the first years, "see you around."
With her last words, Akasuki turned on her heels, making her way towards the gate. It pained her to leave Kenma in a such a terrible way. Thanks to him, she was okay, but thanks to her, he wasn't. Her feet trudged through the school gates, head down, thoughts going crazy in her mind. What's in their future now? She shook her head, that’s not the right question, she's already gotten onto Damien's train, there's no going back. She took a breath of sour air gazing up into the darkened sky, neither the moon nor sun obvious. This is exhausting. All she wanted, she felt the tears rise in her eyes again, was for a peaceful life. Suddenly her phone began to ring. Please just, stop, she lifted it in her hands clumsily clicking deny.
“Suki!”
Shit. Tadashi’s voice filled the silence,
“Suki?”
She cleared her throat, wiping her tears away bringing the phone to her ear, fuck,
“oh, hey Tadashi!”
“Hey Suki! We’re having a small meet up tomorrow, you’re welcome to join us!” Tadashi exclaimed cheerfully.
“Unfortunately,” Tsukishima muttered in the background.
She hadn’t even thought about them. Not since Damien arrived. Was she allowed to?
“Yeah, okay, I’ll think about it,” she insisted, “look I’m late so I gotta go, speak later,” before Tadashi had gotten a word in, she hung up.
Shit. Fuck. She gripped her phone fighting against the will to throw it. Why, why does this have to happen?