Draft version - Russian Roulette - Family secrets

Ch. 87: Fuckers

Maybe he should have had more scruples about it, Phoenix had a right to be awake and wait with them. Still, he was exhausted and would drive himself mad sitting and not knowing, so Gareth accepted the nurse's offer for Phoenix's sanity.

"Gareth, go take a shower, get some rest. I'll stay here and wait. I'll inform you the second there's news." Rami patted Gareth's shoulder with a reassuring smile. "You got him here, now you need to calm down. Whichever way this goes you're going to need your strength."

With a thankful nod Gareth left the room. He discarded the medical outfit and dropped it on the pile of bloody clothes and walked away from the hospital ward. When entering the hall, he saw all the guys gathered in the common room.

He had nothing to tell them.

He did not want to talk with any of them though they wanted to know. All he saw when he looked in there was sympathy, worry and uncertainty. Cowardly and guilt-ridden Gareth turned on his heel and walked up the stairs to his suite.

His remaining clothes got dropped one piece at the time on his way to the bathroom. The scorching hot water ran over him for what felt like hours. Gareth just stood there empty of thought but filled with emotions.

He would lose two of his best friends if Jace died.

From what he had witnessed Phoenix would lose it completely. Gareth had known for years about them, it had not been any of his business, he had approved, not that they needed his or anybody's approval. If only they had been secure enough to come out to them.

Some in Gareth's gang would probably have had a few issues with it to begin with, it would be like that in any crowd with a same sex couple, but none would have said anything, that Gareth would have made sure of.

Drying himself off Gareth went into the bedroom and just sat on the bed.

"I don't want to be disturbed," he grumbled when he heard the door being opened.

"Not here to talk," Vasili said when he had opened the door and popped his head in. He came over and placed a bottle of whiskey, a glass and an ashtray on the bedside table. He handed Gareth two packets of cigarettes and a lighter. "Thought you might need this. We're downstairs if you need anything else."

He did not wait for Gareth to answer or acknowledge anything, he simply left and closed the door.

Gareth ripped he packet open and lit up, he poured a generous whiskey and just stared at it. It was not right to drink himself into a stupor, he wished he could. He needed to drink enough to relax him for sleep. He needed rest.

Phoenix would need him soon enough.

If he could only get the anxiety and rage out. Whiskey would make him relax.

Sitting there with the whiskey and cigarettes he relaxed a little. He heard the door being opened again.

"Can't you just fucking sod off and leave me be for a while?"
"I'm sorry, I'll leave."
"No, stop," Gareth croaked out.

The way her voice had sounded sad and shocked with the way he had spoken was more than he could handle. He had asked her to come and there she was in the middle of the night and he had not bothered to see it was her before he threw shit her way.

Mackenzie saw Gareth sitting there in the almost dark room. He was stark naked. A cloud of smoke surrounded him and from the looks of the already half-filled ashtray he had been chainsmoking. Surprisingly, the whiskey bottle was barely touched.

He lifted his head and looked at her. Mackenzie's heart tightened at the sadness in his eyes. Vasili had given her the headlines of the night's events before she had stormed up the stairs not bothering to hear more.