Pearl Green |KTH| 4 ✔

~9~

As I know it would only lead to heartbreak.

• • •

I swiped the screen to switch off the alarm and groaned in frustration. I rubbed my eyes and sat down on the bed with a frown plastered on my face. I couldn't sleep all night because of that idiot. Why the hell is he wandering in my brain? 

I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I look like a devastated person who lost hope in life with those bags under my eyes. Lately, sleep has been a far end from me and the reason is known. 

Sometimes, I feel that the reflection is mocking me for the things happening around me. It is right, I couldn't manage myself, the people around me, and anything. I just run away from the problems in my life. But does it know? Running away is just as hard as facing it.

"Falling in love is like fighting a war with no weapons. The only shield you have is your soulmate"

"Allah knows how much I hated him before I fell in love with him. Love is an uninvited blackhole which you could never get out"

"Today I slept on his shoulder and his heartbeat became my favorite music"

I smiled at myself reading those lines and closed the book. Baji really knows the definition of love. 

What if I get into that black hole? Will I never be able to get out like her? Why are these lines affecting me a lot more than what they used to from?  Am I missing her much lately? Of course, I need her in times like these. 

I decided to bathe shrugging away all my thoughts regarding her and that idiot. Only a hot shower could help me.

• • •

I pulled up my pants and wore my sweatshirt. Today is a Sunday. Finally, a day where I won't be seeing him. I just want to distract myself from his thoughts today. I will spend my day with Ammi without any disturbing thoughts.

After doing the usual Morning Prayer, I climbed upstairs to take a nap again. I am not going to waste my Sunday, at least by not sleeping. I closed my eyes and drowned myself easily into sleep

"Baji, please don't leave me"

"I can't do that Nazeera. They will kill him if they get to know."

"You can't leave me like this"

"I love you so much Nazeera, always remember that. Be a brave girl okay?"

"Please don't leave me Baji. Please"

"Baji", I yelled as I woke up. It was the same dream again. I don't know if I could call it a dream, it is one of the most dreadful incidents of my life. I was sweating profusely. I know it isn't a nightmare but still, that event haunts me like the devastating aftermath of a tornado.

My stomach grumbled and I feel hungry now. I walked downstairs for having breakfast. Seeing the items already served on the table, I smiled. It's been a long time that I have eaten this.

"What's so special today? Dates, yogurt, and Pita?", I raised my brows and she smiled.

"Are you so used to the Korean breakfast already?", she chortled and I sat down to have the food

"Where is Baba?", I asked her and she sighed.

"The colony is having a meeting today. He had his breakfast and left early", she mouthed and served the breakfast on the plate for herself.