Alexia

Chapter 4

I didn't respond to her comment about money. I couldn't relate to normal people at all. She must've had Dad's money so what would she know about what normal people were like.

"Things weren't going so well in my art lessons either, to the extent that I dramatically dropped out.

I overheard a teacher saying that I was struggling to the point of almost failing so the next time I had art class I threw a load of paint at my art work, then trashed them and then took a craft knife to my left wrist until it bled.

"All my other lessons were going alright though. I still don't know why I did that, other than it was a spur of the moment thing." I explained.

"How much more destructive can you make your life?" Faith asked.

"There was a lot more for me to ruin yet." I said.

"Steve (my agent) was a huge Liverpool FC fan so I took him on a tour around Anfield ground with Ryan.

At that point Ryan and I were growing apart because of his dedication to that place so we ended up in a huge row while we were still showing Steve around.

We broke up by the end of the tour and I ended up punching through one of those glass cases that have fire hoses in them.

Steve got suitably worried about me (my arm was still bandaged from Art) and decided to try to stop the abuse.

"Hurting yourself is not a good way at all to handle a situation." He said sensibly.

"I just lost control; it isn't how I usually handle things." I promised.

"Ryan and I were together for at least three years, and I lost him to a football team." I added.

"Maybe you should get some boxing gloves and a punch bag to take your anger out on." He suggested.

"Okay but I don't think it'll help." I nodded.

I bought them against my judgment and they actually did help me a lot and it's good fun." I described.

"Good, I'm glad you're willing to get help in some aspects of your life." Faith said.

"I went straight into the arms of Adam once Ryan and I broke up. Adam was very good at making jokes at Ryan's expense and he didn't care much for football but skateboarders never do.

I hate those couples who are constantly breaking up and getting back together again so moving on from Ryan was the best way to stop myself becoming one of those people.

Now that I was just in a relationship with Adam we were free to move on from just kissing but we decided to take things slow. Maybe it didn't work out with Ryan because we went straight into having sex.

Adam loves going to "boob town", I swear getting to touch them is the best part of our relationship for him. He even gave them names but they are silly names that I can never remember.

I must just like weirdoes, Ryan with his determination for football, Zack (although I never wanted to go out with Zack) with his infatuation for his best friend and Adam's slight obsession with breasts." I informed her.

"In June I had to sit my AS levels, history (unit two) and English language (unit one) I found them quite easy but most things seem easy when your on multiple drugs (I smoked "death joints" before each exam.

"Steve got me a job on one of the soaps as one of the teens that the real characters on the show meet when they go on their summer holiday.

I quite liked that role even though it was only for two weeks. I got to snog a load of lads as part of the job which was brilliant.