04: our baby

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Saturday 14th June 1998

"Did you already find the cause for the crash?" Mr Kim asked. His eyes were empty and he had dark shadows under his eyes. His leg was bouncing up and down, while he sat in the chair opposite of the police officer. 

His wife, Mrs Kim was sitting next him and held a sleeping toddler in her hands. Her eyes were red, from all the crying, and her skin was pale. Mrs Kim looked like a ghost. 

The ghost, on the other hand, was standing behind her parents. Looking at them with a frown on her lips. Juna looked from her mother, to her father and lastly to her little brother. A sigh left her lips and she scanned the police officers face.

The police officer sighed and shook his head. "Our forensic team is still looking for a cause of the crash. But we can already confirm that Miss Kim died on site." The police officer said and a gasp left Mrs Kim's lips.

"Why was she transported to a hospital then?" The woman asked in a hushed voice—not trying to wake the small boy in his arms. "When she died on site, why was she—", her voice broke and Mr Kim stretched out his hand to touch his wife.

Juna looked at her parents. The distress and terror in their faces scared her. Juna didn't knew this look. Her parents, that usually showered her with love and affection, were merely a shadow of themselves. Juna couldn't imagine what they were going through.

The unimaginable had happened to them.

Juna's parents were nineteen, almost twenty, when they realised Juna was growing in Mrs Kim's tummy. They married soon and five months later, healthy Juna was born. Juna was their everything. 

Since they were so young, they didn't have a lot of money. Mr Kim dropped out of school and started working in a garage, repairing cars and earning the money he needed to feed his two girls at home. Mrs Kim had sold almost all of her deisgner clothes in order to buy clothes for Juna.

But somehow the two young adults managed to live—even with the little money they had. Mr Kim soon got promoted and Mrs Kim started working in a boutique once Juna was old enough for kindergarten. 

And even if Juna ruined their academic career; she brought her parents even more together. And now they were sitting on two dark blue chairs, on the verge of crying because they lost their child. The child that had first made them from simply young adults to young parents.

Mr Kim looked past his wife and Juna could feel her fathers gaze on her. "Dad... I'm here. I'm here...", she whispered. Juna had no idea how often she had said these words in the past two days, but she knew she had to reassure her parents that she was still here. She was still lingering on the planet. 

"You have to understand", Mrs Kim started and looked at the police officer, "she was our baby. She was our first born. Our baby..." A wave of tears rushed down Mrs Kim's face and she bit her lip. "Was there even a chance that she would've survived the crash?" The woman asked and rocked the toddler in her arm—gently, so he wouldn't wake up.

Juna looked at her little brother and her heart broke. Kim Junsu was two years old. He was a surprise to the family and even if Juna complained about becoming a bigger sister when she was almost seventeen, she had loved him dearly.

She still did. She loved Junsu. She missed waking up to him screaming. Juna felt her form shaking. She looked down. Her feet were translucent and shaking. It looked like she was glitching. She sniffled.

She was jumping from her normal self, to her injured self. Flickering in a milky green light. She sniffled once more and looked at her parents. Moving closer to them, she laid a hand on Junsu's head.

"Even if you can't see me, your Noona is here, Junsu-yah. I miss you, little one. I will always miss you." She gently patted his head before caressing her mothers cheek. Her mother shivered and Mr Kim looked at her. "Are you cold, darling?" He asked and Mrs Kim shook her head. 

Juna looked at her. "Mum, I am so sorry for yelling at you that morning. I was behaving really bad. I'm sorry." She took a deep breath. "Take good care of Junsu, okay? He needs you and Dad even more now." Her form flickered once more and she realised she was in her injured form.

Juna took a deep breath. The first time she saw that she could switch from her normal form to her scary, injured one, made her freak out. She looked SCARY. There were stains of blood all over her clothes and her forehead was bleeding. There was blood dripping from her arms as well— it wasn't a pretty sight.

Juna gently patted her mothers cheek before drifting over to her father. Mr Kim was holding the fabric of his trousers between his fists. She sighed. "Dad... I'm sorry I was so moody lately. I'm sorry I barely listened to you." She patted her fathers face. "I'll miss you and Mum. And Junsu. I will miss you all so badly."

She sat down on the desk of the police officer and looked at her family. "Mum, Dad, Junsu... please remember me. Don't you ever forget me." She felt herself getting weaker. It took all of Juna's strength to float around all day. As soon as the sky got darker she felt herself become invisible. 

"I'll miss you all", were her last words, before dissapearing into thin air. (At least for today.)

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