Come On & Save Me

Chapter Twenty Nine

(A/N: Wow, 29 chapters in and I really don't know how or when to end this one! I have a dark ending or a happy ending, but I think the dark ending would quite frankly send me spiraling. I base a lot of Alex's attacks in these on my own attacks. It's sort of my own way of talking about it. So I don't know if an ending is coming soon or not, but I do actually really like writing it and getting to know this other side of Alex more. If anyone has ideas, let me know!)

*Jack's POV*

I just stared at Alex as he did all of this, chewing me out, acting like I'd flip out of he'd shown me his real self? I had an even bigger feeling that I would've been even more comfortable with him then. We would've been helping each other instead of me feeling like a massive pity party.
I wasn't going to argue with him though, maybe. I don't know. What the fuck do I even say or do? I was half tempted to text Rian, but that would be proving Alex right about his best friend needing to babysit him and teach me how. Then again, I was worried about what he'd do.
"Alex get your hands out of your hair." I sighed. I felt defeated honestly.
Alex just glared at me, "No." His voice was laced with so much venom. It genuinely made me want to cry, but I wasn't going to be a pity party once again. That couldn't happen.
"Alex please stop. I just want to fucking talk to you. I just want to know what you've never showed me before. Is that too much to ask?" I asked him, my own voice laced with my own anger. I completely understood that he was having a bad episode, but fuck. 
"Yeah, you know what? It is honestly. I don't wanna be here right now." He went to his closet, grabbed a hoodie and a bottle of Jack Daniels that I didn't know he had stored. He pulled the hoodie on, pulled some shoes on and just walked out of the door and out of the house.
Like an idiot, I just stared at him.
It was fucking freezing right now, snowing, December...He was going to fucking freeze.

I called Rian, waking him up in the process.
"Jack what's wrong" He always knew if it was us, something was wrong. Great. 
"Alex just got pissed at me and he stormed out of the house with this huge bottle of a Jack Daniels and it's freezing, and I didn't tell his parents because I don't want them to freak out but I need your help Rian. Come get me. I don't know which direction he went...I don't know where he's going but he's going to freeze to death." I was talking too fast. 
Rian sighed, "Okay, okay. Calm down. I'll be there in five minutes, I'll look for him on the way." He hung up.

*Alex's POV*

I was anxious leaving Jack, but I was also anxious being around him right now. I was guilty, and that explained my anxiety of being around him and my anger directed at him. I was completely guilty and I took it out on him. I knew how unfair that was. I told him off instead of just talking to him and god damn it I hated myself for it. How could I do that to him? I opened the bottle and took a drink. I did that to him. How could I walk out on him? I took another drink, a bigger one at that. I lied to him in the first place. I didn't like saying that I lied, but he was right. That was exactly what I did and I was a piece of shit for it. I chugged. I didn't stop until I was over a quarter, almost halfway through the bottle. 
I walked for ten minutes, looking for anywhere to hide. I didn't really see anything yet. It was cold but I didn't care right now. My feet which were only covered in slip on Vans were frozen and soaked from the snow. I drank. Then I drank again, and again. I was determined to polish off this bottle. It had been a little over six months that I'd drank too, so I knew I'd be fucked up. I was fucked up. Why did I have to ruin things? Jack and I were good until we weren't. He'd hate me now, and I couldn't blame him. Chug. I looked at the bottle as I began to stumble. I laughed a little. I was halfway through it now. 
I just kept walking and walking, I'd lost track of time, not that I was paying attention to it anyway.
I was stumbling worse and worse though, it entertained me. I polished off the bottle and laughed drunkenly at myself.
"Youuuu stupid piece of shit." I laughed, then stumbled upon a bench. I looked around to see where I was, but I didn't know. I could hardly see. My brain was fuzzy.
Turns out, it was a bus stop bench. So I laid down on it, stomach down, holding the bottle in my hand, laughing at myself.  I laughed even harder when I threw up.
Somewhere in my drunken stupor, I found myself blacking out. Good. I wouldn't remember this shit in the morning.