We Made You || An Eminem FanFiction

Studio Time

"I got really drunk and drove"

Marshall scrunched his face up on confusion "Everyone does stupid things"

"It was 9 am in the morning and I was so drunk I couldn't even see, I took out a road sign, I had driven through school areas... I shouldn't have been driving"

"Oh" He said sitting back rubbing his chin, blue eyes boring into me curiously, he was about to say something but decided not to "Well at least you learnt your lesson?"

"I did it a two more times, I haven't had a license since 2006... I'm lucky they didn't send me to jail, I had a very good lawyer"

Marshall's eyebrows shot up "Damn Harley Quinn, what in the world would have you that drunk at 9 am"

I sighed "You know how it is, sometimes you just keep drinking to get over the hangover, sometimes it's because you're lonely or bored, sometimes I don't even need a reason... My family is full of high functioning alcoholics who are in denial, I'm pretty much predisposed to be one and I guess I let it take me"

Marshall was back to frowning but this time thoughtfully.

"Well, knowing that, why did you drink?"

"Why did you do drugs and drink when you knew there was family history?"

Marshall smirked "Touche"

"I drank because it's the only thing in my life I thought I could control, but ironically it took control of me"

"That's pretty deep" Marshall shorted, with a smile, leaned back in his chair still, a look of realization crossing his sharp features "Yu don't control anything?"

I shook my head "Even less control now then what I had growing up"

"Who makes your decisions?"

"Most of the time my label and Audrey, I can make some, but sometimes they can be overruled, the second person is my mother, my family doesn't trust me to not make a mockery of things... The nervous break down didn't help"

"So that award-winning meltdown was because of control?"

"it was one of the reasons... There are a few things that led to it"

"Damn and I thought I had baggage"

I finished closing off the track then sat back.

"What about your mom?"

"I've been avoiding her calls since news got out, I'm not ready to deal with it, she's going to tell me how much of a disappointment I am "dating a rapper" and it's going to make me feel worse because she doesn't know it's not real"

"What's the normal type of man you date?" He laughed "Shesh she sounds like a nightmare"

"Goodlooking country boys that look great on paper who have a hidden toxic mean streak that enjoy beating on women behind closed doors"

"I'm sorry to hear that, I mean inlay rap about it but id never actually do that" He said as he gave me a look of pity that made me annoyed.

"Well my mother always had a habit of setting me up with terrible emotionally unavailable men because they looked good in pictures" I sighed "That's why I've been single all this time, I'd rather be lonely then bruised and lonely, which worked out for this little gem of a fake relationship, the timeframe works"

He cringed at my last statement and started to roll the pen over his knuckles again.

"What men do you like?"

"If I had a choice? A sense of humor, I guess I just want someone who can make me laugh and accepts me, the real me"

"I get it" He nodded as I stood up.

"I'm gonna head to my room, thanks again for the help, I appreciate it"

"Not a problem" he said, this hard face looking at me kindly with a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

I walk up to my room and stripped off, stepping into the shower and letting the hot water take over.

I overshared way too much about my life today

my mother would be mortified if she found out I was sharing information regarding my mental state.

There is no such thing as being mentally unstable in her world.

Just like the time I would turn up with bruises from those boyfriends she set me up with, she would look the other way, telling me it was my fault because men don't like smart women and that it was most likely my fault because I shouldn't gained that pound and gotten fat.

Sure mom, let's feed all these demons that rattle around in my mind.

I guess something's eating.

I groaned.

I'm such a mess.