oneshots 》minecraft youtubers

[ 12 ] scars

shipping: sapnap x georgenotfound
type: angst and cuddling
au: none
warnings: mentions of transphobia and a suicide attempt

The idea for this fic had been lying around for ages and I finally wrote it in a fit of late night motivation. The shipping was chosen randomly. (I literally took a list of ships, put numbers on them and got a random number generator lol)

X-x-X-x-X

- sapnap's pov -

Sapnap turned around in George's arms, away from the tv screen and the show they were watching. It wasn't uninteresting but also not interesting enough to keep him from acting on his need to cuddle. So he curled up against George's side who was lying on his back, sprawled out across the couch, and tucked his head under the older's chin. He hummed in contentment as George wrapped one arm around him and started playing with his hair, lightly combing through the dark strands and massaging his scalp with gentle fingers every so often.
Sapnap disnt hesitate to slip one of his hands beneath George's hoodie, seeking for skin on skin contact. There was no sexual intent to his actions, he simply wanted to be close to his boyfriend, feel his skin, his heat and heartbeat not muffled by the fabric of his hoodie.

George tugged on his hair in response.
"What are you doing?"
His tone was light, amused, and Sapnap knew without checking that he was smiling down at him.
"Nothing, just wanna cuddle...", he mumbled, scooting a but closer.
George laughed quietly and didn't object, so Sapnap pressed his hand and head to George's chest - one under, one over the clothing. He couldn't hear his partner's heart beating over their breathing and the tv, but he could feel the faint boom-boom under his fingertips.

George hummed beneath him, Sapnap could feel the vibration more than he heard it. "What are you thinking of?"
Sapnap hesitated to respond, burying his face in George's hoodie and breathing in his familiar scent.
"I'm so lucky to have you.", he mumbled, voice stifled by the fabric.
George still heard him and Sapnap could hear the smirk in his answer.
"Damn right you are!"

Sapnap smiled against his boyfriend's chest. Growing bored, he started roaming around with his hand beneath the other's hoodie, avoiding the sensitive areas of George's nipples (he really didn't want to ruin the cozy, comfortable mood) and brushed over his ribs, hearing George giggle. Not resisting the urge to tease his ticklish boyfriend a little, Sapnap applied more pressure, feeling the rise and fall of every rib and the hard bone underneath.
"Stop it.", George laughed, squirming a little underneath him.

Sapnap did as he was told, resting his hand just beneath the curve of his breast. His fingertips brushed over a healed cut, the tissue smoother and at the same time more ragged than the skin around it. Sapnap trailed his fingers along the scar, jumping over the unmarked skin on George's sternum and finding a symmetrical scar on the other side. His body tensed without him even noticing.

It took George so many years of insecurity, fear and abuse to get these scars and even longer to wear them proudly and Sapnap still could get worked up about how unfair all of that was. No one deserved to be invalidated, bullied for who they were and treated like an outcast on a daily basis for years, and especially not George, his precious, caring, beautiful George.
Sapnap knew his boyfriend had long made peace with his past. He had no contact to any of his transphobic family members, he got top surgery to deal with his dysphoria and went to therapy to get over the emotional scars, and was living his life proud and happy.
But even after over a year into their relationship Sapnap still got angry from time to time, at people he never met and the cold, harsh, unfair world in general. Just the thought that the discriminating behaviour and intentionally hurtful words and actions of some people nearly took George away from him, forever... no.

Sapnap curled his hands into fists and squeezed his eyes shut, pressing his face into George's hoodie. He felt the arm around him tighten in response, the hand in his hair moving to rub soothing circles on his neck. It just sent another wave of fury through Sapnap. How could anyone ever want to hurt someone as sweet as George?

"What's going on? You're all tense and you're gritting your teeth again."
George's quiet question pulled Sapnap back into the present, into his boyfriend's arms, where he belonged. He relaxed a bit, unclenching his jaw and fists and pulling back his hand from beneath the cloth.
He had the sudden urge to make sure George was still here, even though he knew he was, and to make sure he stayed, too. His body basically melted into the older's frame, trying to get as close as possible and creating as much contact as possible. He buried his hands in George's hoodie once more, clinging onto him for dear life. George wrapped his arms around him in response, pulling him even closer, and Sapnap closed his eyes, content.
"I'm so grateful you're still here.", he mumbled, voice cracking and tears pricking in the corners of his eyes. He just pressed his face more into the soft fabric of George's hoodie.
"Me too." The older's voice was soft and warm, just like him, and it made the last tension in Sapnap's body seep away. He relaxed, relishing in the feeling of being complete, whole, at peace. Only George gave him that feeling, and he was so, so thankful he got to experience it.

883 words