ErasureMic Trans AU

an angsty awakening

Shota woke up in a cold sweat hyperventilating and shaking like an unstable washer machine, tears running down his face, hair floating, eyes blood red. He looked around to see were he was and couldn't remember where he fell asleep. He shoved his hands into his hair and started to let the tears fall down his face trying to regain normality. He couldn't remember what had happened to him but his whole abdomen hurt like he got stabbed.
Hizashi woke up to see Shota hyperventilating with tears flooding down his face holding his head with his hands shaking vigorously. "Oh no, shh it's going to be alright." Hizashi started to whisper as he came closer to the shaking friend. "Don't touch me!" Shota screamed as he closed his eyes and hid his face. "Sho it's me, Hizashi. I wouldn't hurt you." He continued not knowing how to calm him down from an anxiety attack. He dialed his mums phone and hoped she would come upstairs. Shota continued to cry and push away Hizashi trying to protect himself from what caused his anxiety attack. Hisama finally got the hint and ran into his room seeing Aziawa in the corner of the room crying hysterically begging someone to get away and not to hurt him. She went over to his bed and grabbed a blanket and quickly wrapped him in it preventing him from flailing. "Hizashi make some tea." Hisama said as she hugged the crying teen shushing him back to reality and humming a familiar tune.
When Hizashi got back with the two cups Shota was crying on her shoulder saying that he was sorry for all the trouble he has caused and the rest was inaudible from his hiccups. She didn't interrupt him untill his hiccups were gone and he was calmed down. " you cause us no trouble Shota, I'm glad to have met the kid my son looks up to and to finally know how much he had done for you all these years." She spoke smiling at Shota as he started to hiccup again trying to speak but couldn't. " you are an amazing kid Shota, I see what amazing kid you are even if you have health issues, I'll always see you as a second kid no matter how old you are." She said pulling him in closer. "But I-ive caused you s-so much trouble m-mamma i-i can't repay t-that." Shota said not seeing Hizashi watching his eyes and seeing his hurt soul through them.
"Let's get you back into bed dear," she said as Hisama lifted him into bed. "Just call my name if you need anything Sho." She said leaving the room. Hizashi walked over to Shota sitting up looking at Hizashi with tired eyes, " I made some tea if you would like some?" Hizashi asked passing him a small white cup. " I can't drink a-after crying" he said looking ashamed that he cried in front of him. "Oh...I'm sorry I couldn't help you earlier, I don't know- "it's fine Yamada" Shota said laying down onto the bed eyes still open. Hizashi was never called Yamada enless he did something extremely wrong. "Did I do anything wrong?" He asked tears welling in his eyes. "I-I... *sighs* no, I'm sorry I woke you up with my bullcrap Hizashi" he said as he covered his face with a blanket. "It's alright Sho-chan, I used to have panic attacks also as a young teenager." Hizashi said setting the cups down on the table. "I don't want to talk about it, I hate knowing my triggers to my anxiety attacks and it makes me feel weak hizashi! I turn into a complete child when it happens, I cry and bring so much attention to myself!" He rolled over fast forgetting his cyst and immediately regretted it groaning in pain and annoyance. Hizashi walked down stairs to the couch tears flowing down his face. He ended up staying awake till 2:30 am and ended up sleeping next to Shota and snuggling him until he fell asleep with Shota's arms around his hips.

The next morning at 9:30 am

"Ugh my head" Shota said sitting up in the bed he was in and grabbed his head with his right hand he felt around for his eye drops and couldn't find them in Hizashi's hoodie and decided to check downstairs for them. Trudging down the stairs slowly, grabbing the railing he made it down stairs and checked around for his eye drops not finding them. He Tripped over Hizashi's cat and fell to the floor landing oh his side a bit from not being able to use the other. He heard Hisama get up and speed walk her way over to see what happened.
" what happened Sho?" She asked helping the teen upward. "I tripped over attention horder here and fell, not wanting to hurt my stomach I only used my right arm to stop me. By the way have you seen my eye drops?" He asked rubbing his irritated eyes like that would help. "No, I didn't know you had them" Hisama responded. "I'll go to the store and get another container I guess" he said walking near the door. "Wait Shota. That doesn't mean I don't have any, I just hadn't seen your bottle. My husband has some because he is allergic to pollen and he has to flush his eyes or they burn." She said opening her never ending purse. "Here," she said handing him the bottle. "Uh thanks Hisama..." he said grabbing onto the wall for balance as he was dizzy from moving his head to fast putting the drops in. "You alright Sho?" She asked putting her hand on his shoulder. Shota flinched at the feel of her touch and said he was fine and just got a bit dizzy as he walked back to Hizashi's room seeing Hizashi crying. "Hizashi?!" Shota asked panicked seeing his friend cry. "What did I do last night to upset you?!" He asked upset from the night before. "I don't remember what happened last night can you please tell me what I did to cause you such pain" Shota asked running over to his crying friend. " YOU HAD AN ANXIETY ATTACK AND I TRIED TO HELP YOU BUT I FAILED TO HELP YOU, I OFFERED YOU TEA AND YOU SAID YOU COULDN'T DRINK AFTER CRYING SO I SET THEM DOWN AND APOLOGIZED AND YOU SAID ITS "FINE" YAMADA AND YOU NEVER CALL ME BY MY LAST NAME SHOTA!" He said using his quirk and rolling over and crying hysterically. " I'm so sorry I was being a jerk, I honestly do not remember anything from last night Zashi." He said crawling over to his crush." YEAH WELL YOU ALSO YELLED AT ME BECAUSE I TOLD YOU I USED TO HAVE THEM ALSO ABOUT MY DEAD SISTER AND YOU SAID YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT AND YELLED THAT HAVING THEM MAKES TOU FEEL WEAK, IMPLYING THAT I WAS WEAK AZIAWA!" Hizashi said bursting into tears once again.

"So I had a panic attack...and called Hisama mamma?" Shota asked once Hizashi calmed down and explained everything. "Yeah and you rolled over not snuggling me...not like you are dating me but I got used to snuggles...." hizashi said holding Shota close.

I need to find a way to end these more interesting😅
I just had a friend read this chapter and Hizashi is not mad at Shota he just lost control of his quirk.

I write these at night so any spelling or grammar is bc of sleep diprivan Adrian.