Matt's POV
I laid across my bunk, with my arm covering my eye, trying not to think about her.
I didn't want to think about her.
Not now.
Not ever.
She hurt me.
Worse then anyone ever has before.
And I can't forget that.
But I also love her.
With all of my fucking heart.
And as much as I want to be mad at her for betraying me.
With my friend no less.
She's the love of my life.
And a love like that can't be erased.
It's been four days and I miss her so, so much.
I just want to know how she's doing.
Look into those beautiful eyes that could hold my attention for hours if I let them.
I think about the hours that we would spend laying there together, just talking about the first things that came to mind.
I smiled at the time she karate chopped Johnny for eating a pop tart I'd been saving.
Then I thought about her and Zacky.
Together.
And the anger made my blood boil and my fists clench tight.
Just the thought of him with his hands on her, touching her, kissing her the way I do, makes my stomach turn.
I slammed my fist into my bunk.
"Fuck." I growled.
"Hey." I heard a soft voice say.
I sat up and looked down, seeing Savannah sitting on the bunk below me with her eyes on the ground.
I sighed deeply and jumped down from my bunk.
I sat down next to her and still she kept her eyes glued to the floor.
"How are you doing?" I asked her after a few minutes of silence.
She drummed her fingers on her legs.
"Probably as good as you are doing." She said.
I nodded because she's right.
I sort of forgot that I'm not the only one going through this.
"Yeah that was a stupid question." I admitted.
I heard her laugh softly and nod as well.
"Why?" She asked me.
I looked over and she was staring up at me, her eyes brimmed with tears.
"I don't know. I really don't. I thought everything was going great between us." I told her.
"Yeah. I thought so too." Savannah whispered.
We stayed quiet for a couple of minutes before I felt her hand on top of mine.
I looked up at her and she had an apologetic look on her face.
"I'm sorry." She whispered.
My eyes widened in surprise.
"Why are you apologizing?" I asked her in disbelief.
"I feel sort of responsible. It was my boyfriend that was sleeping with your girlfriend." She said.
I gritted my teeth.
"You have nothing to be sorry about. You didn't do anything wrong. You got hurt, just like I did. You need to hear the apologizes. Not be giving them out." I told her firmly.
She nodded.
"I just don't understand why this happened." Savannah said.
"Neither do I." I said.
"Are you gonna forgive her?" She asked me.
I was dumbfounded by the question.
Because I honestly don't know.
"Are you gonna forgive Zacky?" I asked her back.
"I'm not really sure. What he did was wrong. But I still love him." She laughed.
"Why are you laughing?" I asked her.
"Because you are the first person to hear me say that I love Zacky." She said ironically.
I chuckled.
"Yeah that's ironic." I told her.
"You never did answer my question." She pointed out.
"I know I didn't. And I don't know. I love Missy more than I've ever loved anyone. But she screwed me over. Worse than anyone ever has. And with one of my best friends. There's just some lines that don't get crossed. And she crossed them. I don't know if I can forgive her." I said.
I heard footsteps and the door to the bunks opened.
Jimmy popped his head through and he looked at me and Savannah.
"You have visitors." He said.
Great.
