✓LIFE SENTENCE|| TodoDeku Au

☆Three☆

~ Third Person P.O.V ~ *Again, more trigger warnings*

"You painted my walls with your words, both loving and degrading. You painted my soul with your hatred . . . burning right through me. Yet I found myself still loving you . . ."
—BisexualCricket, In Her Poetry Journal

His body shook and reverberated as he huddled himself in the corner of the bathroom, lips trembling and eyes glistening with salty liquids. No matter how hard he tried, his eyes betrayed him as the tears trickled freely down the plump mounds of his cheeks — staining his flesh with wet streaks. Damn it, he did not know what happened, how he ended up like this . . . and fuck — he was doing so well too. Nothing like this had happened for at least a good few months, the only thing that ever bothered him was his intrusive thoughts or physical contact.

But not this again . . .

God damn it, why this again . . . ?

Izuku's body buzzed, like a swarm of bees were pricking at every corner and crevice of his skin; embedding themselves into the surface below his flesh. His mind filled to the brim with words, words that he believed yet were not his own, they were the words and sayings of another. Someone bigger, stronger, and intimidating. A strangled scream erupted from his chapped lips, trying to do anything to make the words go away.

Of course, that didn't work.

No matter how much he pushed and pulled those damned words never left him alone, they printed themselves into his consciousness. Inking along the thin walls of his brain and soul, driving into his very existence like a honed tip of a blade. Penetrating the diaphanous veil shakily covering his thoughts, ripping through the seams so effortlessly and taking over him completely. A steady stream of tears rolled off the end of Izuku's nose, gliding over the pink tissue of his lips and onto the floor. His body shaking violently now.

Quick, broken influxes of air hopelessly clung to the outer walls of his lungs, trying to get in yet failing nonetheless. The green-haired male's throat lit ablaze as choked breaths made their way in and out, damn it — breathe. Every nerve in his body screamed at him, just as the words swimming around in the trenches of his mind did. Yet he couldn't listen, for no matter, the efforts he put up Izuku couldn't breathe. His face flushed a brilliant scarlet as his fingers instinctively clasped around his throat desperately.

Slowly, his vision began to blur and distort as everything went foggy. Everything except those fucking words! He just wanted them gone . . . was that too much to ask? After everything he had been through why did they have to stick with him? What did he do to deserve such torture?

"Deku!"

Izuku's emerald orbs slowly drug upwards, being met with a blurred over pair of red ones. More strangled breaths being emitted from him like an unsteady pattern.

"Deku, I need you to breathe," Bakugou instructed softly, bringing his hands up to remove Izuku's from his own throat. "He's not here anymore, please breathe . . . Can you do that for me?"

The younger male's digits gripped onto the blond's biceps, squeezing hard as he tried to control the influxes of air. "Ka . . . Cchan . . . I — ah," he gasped, the world around him diminishing as his eyes began to flutter.

Bakugou's arms wrapped around Izuku's trembling frame, lightly burying his nose into the younger's curls. "Please Mido, please breathe. I know it's hard but I'm right here . . . Your big brother's got you, okay?" Bakugou soothed, as he rubbed circles into Izuku's side.

"I'm sorry . . ." Izuku breathed out, finally sinking into the warmth his 'brother' radiated as he got a hold of his breathing issues. "I didn't mean to —"

"Don't you dare apologize, okay nerd?" Bakugou cut in, allowing his head to fall back against the tiled wall with a soft, thump.

The green-eyed male remained silent as he focused on the ministrations Bakugou's hands made on his arms, never exceeding from that particular place on his body. He knew where not to touch, and he never pushed to do so . . . That's why Izuku loved his brother so much because he just knew.

"I don't think it's time for you to go live on campus just yet," Bakugou intoned softly, shaking his head despite Izuku not being able to see it. "If something like this happens again —"

"It won't."

Izuku wasn't sure he believed those words as they fell from his mouth, he just wanted to make sure Bakugou did. As much as the thought of leaving the comforts of the house petrified him, Izuku had to do this; he was going insane being cooped up in the house all day. Things couldn't get better if he didn't make an effort . . . right?

"Mido —" The elder began to protest, only to be swiftly cut off once more as Izuku shifted in his hold now facing him.

Clasping his hand over his elder brother's mouth, Izuku sports an unreadable expression before speaking. "I need to do this, Kacchan. Every day I sit here by myself, not living life to the fullest — by doing that I'm letting him win. I don't want him to win," he admitted solemnly.

"I know that, I'm just —"

"Worried?"

Bakugou's brows knit together, his eyes holding mock irritation for Izuku within them. "If you cut me off one more fucking time —" he began, only to his dismay to be interrupted.

"You'll what?" Izuku challenged, pushing everything that had happened a few minutes ago aside. Just wanting to focus on right now, this time he was sharing with one of the most important people in the world to him. "Ground me?"

"If only," The red-eyed male jested, earning a low chuckle from Izuku who began to pull himself up.

The two silently made there way out of the bathroom and into Bakugou's room . . . well, more like their room. Unspoken words being brought to light without ever actually being pushed out into the air. Bakugou was worried, more than worried at this point — ever since Izuku's parents had died a few years back he took it upon himself to look after the boy. Of course, the two had known each other since diapers but . . . they got unbelievably closer once Izuku moved in. Brothers. Not by blood but by the bond they share.

He'd do anything for Izuku, absolutely anything. And seeing him like this . . . like a fractured, shell version of his true self hurt like a bitch.

"What's with that look on your face? Either you're thinking too hard or you're constipated," Izuku commented, allowing himself to drop onto the bed.

"Excuse me?" Bakugou snorted, "Take a wild guess,"

"It could be both at this point, Kacchan." The younger retorted, just wanting to get under the elder's skin. "Are you constipated?" he asked, a devilish smirk adorning his features.

The blond nearly facepalmed at the question, dropping down into his bed next to his brother. "Why the fuck would I be constipated right now?" he chuckled, only for his face to drop as he inspected the younger. "No but . . . Are you sure you're going to be okay?"

Izuku heaved a sigh, staring upwards at the vast ceiling before him. He wasn't entirely too positive on how to answer such a question, he had been asked that so many times he just wasn't sure. So he took the easy way out —

"I hope so . . ."  

Hello Cricket Cultists!!

Just one last warning here. There are going to be a lot of trigger warnings from here on out, be prepared. 

This chapter was so hard for me to write, not only was I crying my fucking eyes out, but I was trying my best not to reveal too much. I can't wait though, TodoDeku meet is coming up either next chapter or chapter 5 it depends. I'm honestly shaking with excitement guys, you don't even understand because I can't say too much.

The struggles of an author.

Uhm, Sunday's are my official off days so no posts tomorrow. I'm still trying to get into the groove of my new schedule, so I might only post one chapters a days for all of my books until further notice.

Until we meet again!!!