All is Found

14

            "You just made me feel so much lighter you have no idea." I said as tears pooled in my eyes.

            "We got your back Ashlyn. Also all of your assets are unfrozen if you need to make any purchases. I'm going to get back to work and I will give you a call if we have anything else." Lindsey said.

            "Thank you Lindsey." I said.

            "You're welcome Ashlyn." Lindsey said and hung up the phone.

            After the phone call was over I cleared my throat and slipped my phone into my back pocket and looked up. Thea was standing right behind the couch and probably heard everything through the phone.

            "That is really good news Ash." Thea said quietly and gave a smile. I just nodded not trusting my voice before nodding towards the door.

            Thea got the hint and we left her house a few moments later. We went through the drive through of the closest Dunkin Donuts and then drove to my house. When we got there all of the news vans from last night are still here. Thea must have caught my drift and drove around the block behind my house. The patrol car was sitting in the same spot as last night when we got out.

            The officer jumped out of his car and Thea went over to speak with him as I caught up. He gave Thea the house key he was given and Thea pulled me over to the fence. She took my iced coffee as I hopped over the fence then handed me our coffees along with our breakfast before doing the same. Once we were both in my yard I took the key from Thea's hand and unlocked my back door stomping the excess snow off my boots before stepping inside.

            Thea followed my lead as I kicked off my boots and looked around the kitchen. Everything is the same as it was the last time I was here. I took a seat at the kitchen table as Thea shut the back door and dove into my first wake up wrap. It didn't take me long to suck the first one down then the second.

            After I was done I threw out my garbage and took my coffee upstairs to my room. I sighed when I opened the door. My room was still a mess and I didn't want to clean it up. I set my coffee down on my desk and quickly made my bed before starting on picking up all of the paper on the floor.

            I ended up sitting on the floor looking through the random pieces of paper. Some are bills, others are random contracts, a few are fan mail and some have lyrics written on them that i wrote quickly before the thought left my mind.

            "Need any help?" Thea asked from behind me. I jumped at the sound not noticing her walk into my room.

            "Uhm not really I'm just trying to make my room look a little more presentable. I had piles of random lyrics on my desk and this one just really caught my eye." I said and held out the paper titled Temple to her.

            There was only a verse written on the paper but I wrote that within the last year during a low moment on tour. Basically the song is about the saying my body is a temple. I took that saying and turned it on its head saying that if my body is like a temple then why does it hurt.

            "This is so powerful Ashlyn. You should try and finish it." Thea said and held onto the paper.

            "Maybe, here take these too. I'll stick them in my laptop and take them all with me." I said and gave Thea all of my lyric sheets.

            Once all of my papers were in order I took the pages from Thea and stuck them inside my laptop and grabbed my flash drive. I took a look around the room and saw my brothers Boston Red Sox hat sitting on my nightstand and I walked over to grab it. I pulled the SPD hat off and slipped on the old dad hat. After it was on I looked back down at my nightstand and saw the picture of my siblings and I. We went to dinner one night at a restaurant on a pier and had a waitress take our picture. It was one of the last pictures I have of the three of us.

            I grabbed the frame and took the picture out and held it close to me. Thea came up behind me and I turned to show her the picture.

            "That's Ashley and Asher. It's one of the last nice pictures of the three of us together." I said and took a deep breath.

            "You guys all look alike." Thea commented. All three of us had dark brown almost black hair and blue eyes.

            "Yea we did" I said put the picture down on my nightstand.

            We left my room after that. I didn't really want to take anything else right now. I had a feeling I would be back here soon. When we were back downstairs I called Pat and asked if I could stop over. He said yes right away and he was waiting for us by the back door after we hopped the fence.

            Pat and Eds son Nicholas was waiting in the living room when we walked through the back door. He pulled me into a hug right away and I held onto him for a minute giving him my condolences before we pulled apart. I sat on the other side of the couch and Pat sat right in the middle of us. Nicholas and Pat went over the details for Eds funeral for the when and where. The wake would be in two days and the funeral will be the day after. They didn't want to do anything at the burial site because of the changing weather.

            They asked me to sing My Way by Frank Sinatra at the funeral, one of Eds favorite songs. Frank Sinatra was always playing in there house, both Pat and Ed loved his music. This will be a tall ask for me as I wanted to do this song justice and because I need to brush up on all of the words.

            We didn't stay took long at Pats house. I wanted to give him some time alone with his son. Nicholas doesn't come to visit as often as Pat would like because he owns a construction business in North Carolina. So when he does come up I disappear for most of his visits. Pat gave me a wink after Thea walked out the back door first and I gave him a stern look before slipping out the door behind her.

            The ride back to Thea's house wasn't long and we stopped to pick up salads for lunch from the deli. Once we were back at her house I pushed the salad to the side and opened up my laptop to try and get some work done with putting up my apartment for sale. I called the building owner and he talked me through what I needed to do as I explained what I wanted. After that was set up I called the moving company he suggested and asked for them to leave me boxes so I pack up my own things. Anything that I left could be thrown out or given away or to the new renters of the place once it sold.

            I also bought a plane ticket to Los Angeles for the night of the funeral. I was only staying there for two days to pack everything up. I didn't want to be there longer then I had to be.

            Once that was done I went through my phone book on my laptop and saved some numbers in my cell phone. When I found Eli's contact I dialed the number and waited. He actually didn't answer the first time I called so I tried again and that time he answered. At first he didn't believe it was me calling. I had to tell him the story of that one time he got so drunk at an after party he fell into a bush and got a branch stuck in his arm that I pulled out and laughed so hard I peed my pants.

            We had a tearful conversation over the phone and he wanted to get on the next flight out to Massachusetts but I told him not too. I told him my plans to fly out to LA in the next couple of days to pack up my apartment. He was excited and said he would pick me up from the airport and would help me get everything together.

            Our phone call didn't last much longer. After I hung up I closed my laptop and joined Thea on the couch. She didn't say anything when I rested my head on her shoulder and I didn't say anything when her arm moved onto my thigh. The smile on my face lasted the rest of the day.

Song on the side is My Way by Frank Sinatra.