Love and Loss

Prologue

Love
/ləv/

noun
an intense feeling of deep affection.

To be binded to someone by your mind, heart, and soul. A feeling so strong the mere taste of it leaves your stomach yearning for more.

An emotion so raw your heart grows stronger as if it was multiplied by two, and your mind no longer belongs to yourself but to the one you love as well.

Love is a feeling of infinite happiness.

It is one of the most powerful emotions a human can experience.

Deija never thought she could experience an emotion stronger than that of love.

That was until she came face to face with a new emotion, that rocked her world in the lost unexpected way.

Loss.

"Please! Somebody help me! Please!"

Deija's almost lifeless body laid in her boyfriends arms as he ran into the hospital, her blood coating his shirt. She looked at her surroundings with dreary eyes, her vision becoming cloudier by the second.

"Please! I need help!" Cameron screamed, tears welling in his eyes.

"I need a gurney stat!" A nurse yelled, running up to the pair with a staff of ER nurses right behind her. "What's her name?"

"D-Deija Wal-Walker." He stuttered, his eyes still wide with alarm. "Please you have to help her."

"We will sir, I promise. Where's that gurney?!" They watched as a set of nurses rushed a gurney over to them and Cameron immediately laid Deija onto it carefully.

"Cam..." She rasped, gripping onto his hand as tight as she could, her eyes wide with fear. "D-Don't leave me. I'm scared."

He held her hand to his chest and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. "I'm right here baby. Right here."

She tried her hardest to find solace in his eyes, but all she could see was the same fear that was clouding hers. She knew she needed to calm herself down for more than just her health, but she couldn't stop herself from stressing.

But see, that's what loss does to people. It instills in you a fear you've never felt before. Your stomach wraps between itself, your head pounds in frustration and your hearts beats out of anxiousness.

Your body prepares you for the worst.

"She's losing a lot of blood! I need two rounds of O negative stat, I will prep Ms. Walker for a transfusion. Page Dr. Montgomery ASAP!" The nurse said rapidly as they began to wheel Deija down the hallway and away from Cam. The only one who could keep her calm in this moment of urgency. The one she needed the most.

"Cam!"

"Let me go! I need to be with her!" Cameron yelled as security tried to hold him back from reaching her. "Deij!"

"No! You have to take me back!" She cried as they wheeled her into a new room, away from her stability. "Please! Take me back!"

"You'll be okay. We are trying to help you." The nurse smiled, running to the other side of the room. Another nurse handed her a tray of tools and she grabbed a needle, tapping the inside of Deija's arm to try to find a vein.

"Where is Doctor Montgomery?!" She yelled.

"She is about to scrub in."

"Well go find her! Tell her this is an emergency." She said before injecting the IV into my arm.

"Emergency?" Deija whispered to herself, watching as nurses ran throughout the room hooking her up to different machines.

She looked down at herself, seeing she was covered in blood.

Was it mine? It has to be mine. She thought.

Her calm attitude had flew out the window. For the last fifteen minutes she had almost been in a daze. But now it was all coming back to her, and she could feel her heartbeat speeding up by the second.

"I-I need my boyfriend." She mumbled feeling fear rise in her chest. "I-I can't-"

"Everything will be fine, Ms. Walker. Just try to calm down." She rubbed her arms reassuringly.

"Please I need him." She begged.

Just as she went to respond a new doctor rushed through the door with a cap, gown, and gloves on almost as if she was about to perform a surgery.

"Doctor Montgomery. She's losing a lot of blood."

"Get me a microscope I need to see in here. She looks pale, give her two more rounds of O neg." The doctor with red hair stated calmy as she sat at the end of the bed and raised my legs. "I need more light!"

"She's losing too much blood! I need gauze. Clear this area for me."

A strong pain sliced through Deija's back causing her to scream out in pain. Her eyes welled with tears as she fought through it, hoping the intense pain would go away.

What is happening to me?

"That's not good." A nurse mumbled from beside the doctor.

Her heart dropped.

"What's not good?" Deija said. When no one answered her, she sat up a little, looking at everyone with wide eyes. "What's not good?!" She spoke louder.

All eyes flew to her as the doctor and the nurse moved between her legs urgently.

"Everything will be okay, Ms. Walker. Just breathe."

No matter how many times she said it, Deija could feel something wasn't right.

"What's wrong?!" She screamed, her mind assuming the worse.

"What's wrong with my baby?!"

You see, the funny thing about loss is that it is a lot like love. Though the two emotions are polar opposites, they both are forever. Love is a feeling that never goes away and loss is the same.

Isn't it weird how god gives you something so good just to tear it away from you in seconds?

loss
/lôs,läs/

noun
the fact or process of losing something or someone.

Loss is the strongest emotion of all time. It will sweep in and knock you off your feet, taking everything you've ever loved from you with no remorse. And it's in that moment, your soul leaves your body and takes every good feeling you've ever had with it. It is the start of your downfall.

One that no one could've imagined.

"Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of loss."

-Kahlil Gibran