What Emma Lost | The Promised Neverland Fanfiction [Emma, OC]

Burning Into Clouds of Ashes

I wasn't too keen on believing the world was infested by demon-like creatures, but I have yet to see evidence proving otherwise either — finally, Ray and I entered the dining room. He walked pass me and leaned up against the right side wall. On one of the tables, I noticed a leather survival backpack filled with all sorts of goodies inside, ranging from a pocket knife to a sleeping bag, just sitting there.

"There's also a couple of medication stuffed in there for treating poisons, rashes, or just plain wounds." Ray pointed out. "I assume you'll know which ones to use?"

"Yeah." I reassured him. "No need to worry, Ray, I'm sure I'll manage."

He both scoffed, then sighed sorrowfully, crossed his two arms together, and carefully thought of his next words. "Hey, Elios."

"Yes, Ray?"

"If you were in my position, would've you let the others die like I did?" He looked away, fully expecting me to scorn him verbally. "...All the others that I've sacrificed over the years, they were all good people, but I just let them die — they were already a lost cause and I was afraid that they might ruin my plan — they've long been dead, but I still can't shake the haunting thought of their demise."

Honestly? "If I were in your position, then yeah, you have yet to gather the necessary components together, so you let them perish for the sake of others. I would've done no different."

There was absolute silence after I've fully delivered my answer across the room, but I kept my sight on my packed bag, and one by one, I cross off the necessities that it was already storing. It wasn't long though, when Ray started the oppressed conversation once more. "That condition made it so you possessed nothing, like I had before, but what if you found out for yourself? You'd most likely come up with a way to break everyone out of here with absolutely zero casualties."

"Ray, what's done is done. You didn't tell them because you worry it would've brought death to others who still had a slight chance of escaping. If you were certain that they won't make it, then stand firm by your choice of letting go, it's all you can do now, nothing else." He was desperate for closure, I could tell. He wouldn't stop blaming himself for not preventing the curtains to close on his deceased siblings, and even slightly wishing he could've done something to save all those who died.

"Stand firm." He repeated. "Alright. I'll try and take your advice to heart. Thanks, Elios."

I gave him smile and a nod to let him have some sort of affirmation, but that resolved dilemma had me thinking: he let all those others die, but not me, why? "Hey, Ray."

"Did I miss something? We can just go raid the storage room or the kitchen if there's still anything you need."

"No, nothing like that." I affirmed while slinging the bag over my shoulders. "Everything's pack all neatly in here."

He looked at me eerily and stood properly, not leaning against the wall, but still had his normal cross-armed, scour looking demeanor with him. "Why did you tell me all this?"

"What do you mean, don't you want to live?"

"I meant why me specifically?" I cleared it up, even though I knew full well that he understood my previous question. "Everyone that have been adopted before me — Violet, Alex, and many more — you've never bothered telling anyone but me, care to explain?"

The boy gave out a big sigh before proceeding with his justification. "To tell you the truth, I didn't originally plan to inform you, it was initially only Norman and Emma I had desired to live." He declared. "But since that orange-haired idiot developed emotional feelings for you, I didn't have much of a choice — if she discovered reality as it is and realizes you're dead, then she'd practically be a walking zombie; a living shell of who she once were, if you like that term better — we've seen how she always acts around you, haven't we?"

"Hold it." I say. "Only Norman and Emma? Not any of our other siblings here? You haven't included yourself either, just what exactly is your plan, Ray?"

Needless to say, he was hesitant with revealing his true intentions, he had already bitten his tongue multiple times to keep it from slipping out. Now that I have picked up some aspects of it, he knew there was no disclosing his way out of his older sibling's suspicions. "There's a slight possibility that there can be more than two kids escaping, but I had dialed it down to those who can actually make it."

"There's Don, Gilda, maybe Nat when he's older, even Ana, but there aren't any guarantees. I've designed the plan so it's open for them to join the escape, but that's only if they can pull their own weight together." He continued. "But as for the actual details: 3 three years from now, I shall let another one of us die as a means of evidence, and it'll probably be Conny. I would intentionally place little bunny where Emma's likely to see it — and given how she is — she'll most definitely race towards the gates just to return it."

"And after that?" I should've expected this from Ray, he isn't afraid to risk everything in an effort to achieve his goals. "To what are you leading this up towards?"

"I'll let fate do the rest, whoever's viable breaks out while I stay here in this very room." A pause. "Burning myself into clouds of ashes — the fire will both act as an atonement and a distraction — brilliant, ain't it?"