A Longing Kind of Love

Chapter 1

Present

Paige

Death came knocking on Grandma's door the other week. After that strange conversation I had with her a couple of months ago, I knew she let death in with open arms. Death would take her to my Grandfather.

She died in her sleep, peacefully. I miss her already. The last time I saw her alive was three weeks ago, and she seemed to be okay. Our routine was that we talked about the news, watched TV, and ate takeout. No indication that would be the last time I saw her. It's still unclear how I feel. Now that she is gone, I realize that she was gone the whole time. A part of her died when Grandpa died, and that was the part that I grew up with.

The wake is going smoothly, but I am a little edgy because I am making a speech at her funeral, and I don't know what I want to say. Mom insisted I speak at the funeral service because I was her favorite grandchild. Considering Derek and I are her only grandchildren, that isn't saying much. Since I visited her more often, she must think that. Mom and Grandma had a complicated relationship. There was tension surrounding them, but neither talked about it. Even as we stand by her casket, I can feel unease radiating from my Mom. She is standing between Derek and me, holding our hands in what feels like a vice.

I glance over at her. "Can you ease up on the grip? My hand is going numb." I whisper. As she loosens her hold, and I see Flossy walking up.

"Hey girl, sorry to hear about your grandma. She was so," Flossy has to pause to collect her thoughts because, well, she hated my grandmother, actually it was mutual. Every time they encountered each other, it went one of two ways: Grandma making fun of Flossy's bohemian style or Flossy doing some shit like lighting sage and chanting to Grams aura, which she said was an ugly brown. She continues, "eccentric. Unlike anyone I have ever met."

She has a forced smile on her face. Being respectful to the dead is important to her, even if they weren't pleasant during life. Flossy reaches in her pocket and hands a stone to my Mom, Derek, and me. Mom and Derek look at her funny.

"This is Amethyst. It has all kinds of healing abilities. This can be very beneficial when experiencing grief. It can also help in forgiveness of oneself, hopefully giving you peace." she interjects. Flossy is a very spiritual person and is in touch with her "chakra," I think that's what she calls it. Some might call her a bit of an odd duck, but she is one of my best friends. It wasn't till college when she started her "spiritual journey."

"Thanks. I know you two had your differences but it means a lot that you are here." I smile, wrapping my arms around her in a hug.

Suddenly, she stiffens in my embrace. I let her go and she is staring at something behind me.

"Don't look now, but the hottest guy just walked in. Wait a minute, is thatー"

Holy shit. It's Brett. Derek's childhood best friend. I haven't seen him since he left for the marines five years ago. He was only seventeen at the time. His time in the marines was certainly kind to him. He's taller and more muscular from what I can see in his suit. When did he get back? It's had to have been a few months since his hair is long. I know they have to keep it buzzed in the military. Derek never told me he was back. His face lost that baby-look, his jaw is square and sharp. I can't explain it, but his eyes are different. It's like I can see through his eyes that he's seen a lot of things. That probably doesn't make any sense one soever. Before I can think about it anymore, his eyes find mine.

Flossy whispers in my ear as he walks towards us, "Just play cool."

She liked you, thought you were, and I quote, "cute as a button."