*screaming into a pillow*

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*screaming into a pillow on the floor* 

What. The. Actual. FUCK.

Me: *dealing with such bad gender dysphoria that I stay up until 4 in the morning crying and just feeling terrible about myself* 

My God Damn Body: Ha. *laughing while pointing* You're going to be on your period now.

Me: *bangs head against floor*

Life: Also, it's going to be hot as Hell outside. 

Me: *wearing jeans and a hoodie* Too fucking bad. 

Mom: *it's 80+ degrees* You have to wear short and a T-shirt.

Me: *scared to tell her I am on my period, so I can't wear one of my knee-high shorts, and I lost the other* No!

Mom: Go. Change. 

Me: *runs inside to change into a girly pair of shorts and cries for a quick minute* 

Mom: I also can't order your binder for a while. 

Me: *not having any shirts that make me look somewhat flat* Fine. ):(

Mom: Why are you mad?

Me: *glaring out the window* It's fine. 

Also Me: *wanting to cry from being too girly with everything I do* 

I fucking HATE being a girl. It isn't that I want to be a boy, I just don't want to be a girl. 

I also cut my stomach today,  which just made me feel even worse. 

*screaming* 

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