Lovely Girl...

Chapter 9

The next days we didn't really leave the bed. We both must have lost some weight. We didn't really eat and were very active. Those seriously were the best days of my life. We slept and had sex, or pleasured each other in some sort of way. We never got tired of it.

Today was the last day before the others would come back. Kirstie was at her apartment, while I got us some Starbucks. I had gotten rid of all evidence in mine and Kevin's apartment. I went to Kirstie's and gave her her coffee. She thanked me and we sat down in her living room. We were both exhausted and tired. We decided to just sleep today. I think Kirstie was sore actually. Maybe it was too much.

We had come really close... well obviously... but what I mean is that mentally we had bonded as well and I'd say we were a thing now and boy was I happy about that!

“Avi... listen...”, she said, not looking at me “the last days were amazing, but... that doesn't mean we're a thing now.”

“What?”, I didn't understand what was going on.

“I think we should just forget this and... it never happened...”, she said. I was hurt and mad. Is she serious? What's that supposed to mean? Then it hit me.

“So I was just a meaningless fuck to you? Is that what you're trying to say?”, I stood up as I yelled at her “like: 'Hey, why not use Avi to finally get laid after a year?' Is that it? Great Kirstie! Very well played!”

“No Avi...”, she stood up as well and reached out her hand to touch my shoulder. I pushed her hand away.

“Don't fucking touch me!”, my voice got silent as I said: “I really thought this meant something to you. It sure did to me!”, I turned and walked towards the door “See you in rehearsals”, were my last words before I left. I didn't know when I would see her next; if it was rehearsals or some other time. I just wanted to make clear that I didn't want to see her, unless it was necessary. How could I be so stupid and naive? She was just playing with me!

I went into my room and flopped onto my bed. All the stuff that happened here was just meaningless sex... to her. To me it wasn't. How could I think she loved me? I'm so stupid!

I crawled off the bed disgusted. I turned around and kicked my door, yelling out of frustration.

I laid down on the floor, not wanting to touch the bed nor couch. The last few days traveled through my mind once again. All the passion and love... LIES! Yes it was fun and pure lust. But deep inside it was about being near her. Feeling and touching her. Cuddling and sleeping with her in my arms. About making her happy. I hate her. But I love her.

With so much on my mind and the exhaustion from the past days I fell asleep on the floor.

I woke up to the front door shutting. I looked at my phone. 10 in the morning. Did I really sleep 20 hours? On the floor?

“Avi?”, I heard Kevin yell for me.

“Yeah hi! Just a second!”, I yelled back. I stood up and my back hurt so bad! I slowly walked out my bedroom to be greeted by my brotha.

“Hey!”, he greeted me, hugging me.

“Hey! How was Germany?”, I asked him.

“OH my gosh! It was amaziiiiing!”, he sang.

“Okay, let's get some coffee and you can tell me more!”, I suggested.

“Starbucks?”, he asked.

“Starbucks.”, I confirmed.

“What's this?”, Kevin picked an empty condom package from the floor, next to the couch. Shit. “Avi... did you get some?”