I'll stand by you Twilight Fiction

Chapter 8 Sorry Not Now Jake

Renesmee POV:

It's the next day now and Alice still hasn't returned but Jasper, Esme and Carlisle have...how strange?. I was with Jake at his house checking he was okay after I was a little harsh yesterday. He held me in his tight grip inches away from his lips, and shivered as they touched mine "I love you so much Nessie" He pured into my skin. My hands began to tremble, Jacob stopped abruptly "What's wrong?" He asked as his eyes sank into my soul "I just need some time to myself if you don't mind" I gushed "Of course" He walked himself out the room through the hall, and into the kitchen I presume.

"Get a hold of yourself Renesmee. Jake loves you and you love him, this is what people who love each other do" I said convincing myself, taking in deep breaths. I walked into the bathroom to wash my face off. The cold water seemed to help as I felt the tense in my muscles drift away. I heard a knock on the door "Babe are you okay?" Jacob murmered against the door. My brain began swimming back to reality, Jacob, that's why I'm here to show; not to prove that I love him. "Yeah" I whispered as I wallked through the door way "Good" He smiled pulling me in by my waist. I felt safe in his tight but gentle grip around me. His lips had found a new intensity against mine, and I couldn't help but melt into his arms. I pressed my body against his harder, feeling his warmth against my marble skin. I was able to feel his hands pulling roughly in my hair and I ran mine up and down his chest, just marvelling at how tense his body felt below my fingertips.

The butterflies in my stomach wouldn't stop flying around and my mind buzzing constantly chanting out my dads orders, wedding plans. Argh! why can't i just enjoy the moments with my fiance'. I tugged away and quickly ran towards the door and left Jake. I couldn't stay i need to clear the air with everyone first and then mabey go back and help Jae with the invitations and the book a honeymoon, there's just too many things that need doing to be doing nothing, we'll have pleanty of time for that at our wedding and on out honeymoon.

When i got home i asked dad once again where Alice was, he didn't know (he said) but i know he's lying. She can't just be out there doing nothing, for crying out loud i need her to help me with MY wedding. Right i'm going to ask Jasper he will obviously know as their husband and wife.

"Jasper" i shouted

"Yep Ness" he said whilst sliding down the stair rail

"Please please please can you tell me where Alice is" i said to him giving him puppy eyes

"Erm i don't know Ness" he said but the winked after obviously not going to tell me infront of my dad

I signalled for him to come into my bedroom, and then hopefully he will tell me.

"Ness you aunt Alice is avoiding you and Jake, she dosen't want you to get married she feels you deserve better than that mut" Jasper told me

"oh" i whispered

"It's okay Ness she'll be fine" Jasper assured me and left

Well wasn't really the answer i was looking for, but it's better than no explaination.

Alice POV:

Running.

I am running.

I had no desire to stop, no feeling of exhaustion, and no plan of action.

I felt free of the world yet carried the burden of my guilt.

Jasper did not go after me. He understood and he accepted. He could not deny the love of my family. It broke his heart that i would be leaving for a while, but it devestated mine to know that i had caused it.

LOVE. Such an emotionally packed word repeated itself in my head.

I thought I knew the feeling, I thought I understood the sacrifices but now I knew how much I lacked.

A familiar scent made me stop in my tracks.

EDWARD.

"Alice, don't." He simply said.

Don't? Don't? How could he ask me such a thing?? I was aware of how loud my thoughts were to him. But no need to come chasing after them just leave me alone. 

His voice answered my question out loud. "It has been five days, Alice. She will not want to remember. She will hate you because she hates me." I knew exactaly who he was talking about Renesmee.

I looked at his face, seeing the flicker of guilt and pain reverberate in it before he composed himself.

"I did her wrong by leaving her I do still love and for that I will forever be ashamed. I could not return to her to admit my wrong. She will hate you because of what I have done." He was just concerned about his little sister.

"Edward. She deserves an explanation of what happened. Even if it comes from me. She deserves the truth she deserves to know how I feel. I can't live with myself if I don't try. I need to do this. I need to know if she-if she feels anything. I can't rest."

I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples.

I felt Edward wrap his arms around me. "If you need to do this, I cannot stop you. I just thought I would try. I just don't want you to get hurt."

"I know Edward but she and Jasper are my everything as Bella is yours."

Edward nodded and I ran. The wind made it feel like I was flying. I ran until I felt drops of rain on my face. I was assaulted with the familiar scent of wet grass and pulsing blood as I entered the woods. I growled as I recognized the demanding burn in the back of my throat.

I haven't fed in a week and the smell of humans camping close by made the monster inside growl in protest.

I ran far away from the temptation before climbing up a tree. I raised my nose to the air searching for anything other than human. At this point I could go for a grizzly bear. That should certainly make Emmett proud.

Ahhh. Deer, a small herd, was on its way straight to where I took refuge. I waited and soon enough the small herd appeared and I feasted.